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Old 11-14-2012, 09:14 AM   #76
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Originally Posted by Bonnie151 View Post
I think you may be my new best friend (and I spent my Junior year in Heidelberg- lovely town!). ITA. Her teen years shouldn't be just about academics. There's so much opportunity to find areas outside of school where she can really excel. Don't push the academics to the point where they become her life (which is what will happen if you're aiming to get her into college at 14!).
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Why in the world would you do that? Dd16 could probably graduate now - she always took academic classes as electives (she's taking honors accounting now for college credit, for fun), always had zero period, and this is her first year with a lunch period. There is NO WAY I want her to graduate early and go to college.What are your dd's passions? For college admission, they want to see a continuance of something she loves, that she is a leader in, something she's stuck with. Dd is music and theater (HS choirs, All State, Regional, tons of plays...), ds14 is soccer, music, and theater (same as dd, plus has been playing soccer since the age of 4, starter on his freshman team). Focus on getting her involved in something she loves outside of school.
All of this...I too have an extremely bright 15 year old freshman. His scores and abilities blow me away. I too am waiting for the realization that he may not be the smartest kid in class but it hasnt happen yet. But I so want him to have all the experiences of being a kid, a teen, to get the HS experience and send him off to college at the right age and maturity.

I would find a school where she can be challenged and I would have her expand her interests outside the classroom. Does she play a sport, and instrument, does she do theater?

My son now attends a pretty well known prep school in our area, the admissions director during the parents interview, look at my DS's tests scores and said hmmm gee your kid must have been pretty bored at his parochial grade school. I said yes he probably was but sometimes being bored is ok, and that we found other ways to challenge him outside the classroom. He loves sports but isnt that great at it but isnt horrible either. This was where his challenge lie. He worked so hard at 3 sports, football, basketball and baseball. It made him well rounded and he saw great improvement in himself. He may have been more proud of that, than academics that has always come so easy to him.

Oh yeah he read at 2, no one taught him at all, just picked up the newspaper and read words to us and asked what they meant.

But he was the last toddler on earth to be potty trained

So neither to me are indicators of squat!

ETA He also struggled at a young age being able to "talk" with his peers bc they just were not on the same level as he was. Like I said his passion was sports and cars. He could talk circles around some adults. Actually the dads of his friends LOVED talking to him bc he could discuss ERA and gas mileage and brands of cars beyond the Phillies won last night and that car is blue. This all leveld out eventually and he also learned to tailor his conversations appropiately for the audience which I feel is a HUGE social skill to learn. He doesnt talk down to people like so many extremely smart people can wind up doing.
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Old 11-14-2012, 09:28 AM   #77
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Or it could be an indicator that she just doesn't have a lot in common with the kids around her. The whole "high school experience" doesn't work with some temperments.
I certainly have a kid who does not like the whole "highschool thing" and she WILL be happier in a more adult environment. But even she had things she would miss in every area we lived up and has been reluctant to move. A few close friends, karate schools, girl scout troops, etc. It appears from the OP that this girl has lived pretty much her entire life in one place--if NOTHING there,at age 11,causes her to feel she does not want to leave, it would seem that she has not been helped/encouraged to find things and places and people that she can connect with.
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Old 11-14-2012, 09:34 AM   #78
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All of this...I too have an extremely bright 15 year old freshman. His scores and abilities blow me away. I too am waiting for the realization that he may not be the smartest kid in class but it hasnt happen yet. But I so want him to have all the experiences of being a kid, a teen, to get the HS experience and send him off to college at the right age and maturity.

I would find a school where she can be challenged and I would have her expand her interests outside the classroom. Does she play a sport, and instrument, does she do theater?

My son now attends a pretty well known prep school in our area, the admissions director during the parents interview, look at my DS's tests scores and said hmmm gee your kid must have been pretty bored at his parochial grade school. I said yes he probably was but sometimes being bored is ok, and that we found other ways to challenge him outside the classroom. He loves sports but isnt that great at it but isnt horrible either. This was where his challenge lie. He worked so hard at 3 sports, football, basketball and baseball. It made him well rounded and he saw great improvement in himself. He may have been more proud of that, than academics that has always come so easy to him.

Oh yeah he read at 2, no one taught him at all, just picked up the newspaper and read words to us and asked what they meant.

But he was the last toddler on earth to be potty trained

So neither to me are indicators of squat!

ETA He also struggled at a young age being able to "talk" with his peers bc they just were not on the same level as he was. Like I said his passion was sports and cars. He could talk circles around some adults. Actually the dads of his friends LOVED talking to him bc he could discuss ERA and gas mileage and brands of cars beyond the Phillies won last night and that car is blue. This all leveld out eventually and he also learned to tailor his conversations appropiately for the audience which I feel is a HUGE social skill to learn. He doesnt talk down to people like so many extremely smart people can wind up doing.
I totally agree and that is the kind of thing am getting at.

I have one kid who is naturally very good at the social thing, but he needs to work on academics.

On the flip side,DD is great at the academics, but we have had to focus and work on making sure she will be able to get along socially with all kinds of people--because in the real world of jobs, etc she will need to. (oh, and that focus is paying off )

From the OP and her follow ups it does not sound like the OP has focused on much other than how much sooner her child dose everything than other kids.
Childhood should not be a race to finish early, it should be a process to get the most TOTAL, whole being out of in those brief 18 years.
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Old 11-14-2012, 09:39 AM   #79
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I was reading at 2...and trust me, while I am smart, I am far from gifted. Reading at 2 is NOT a good indicator, IMO!

Agree. My youngest did NOT read until she was 5 and she is naturally gifted at language arts now.

That is why taking the ACT and SAT tests NOW will tell OP where her dd really sits.
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Old 11-14-2012, 09:41 AM   #80
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As to apparently not minding leaving her friends (assuming she has friends, and I don't mean that in a snarky way), most kids that age like the status quo. Actually, many, if not most adults also prefer it. There's a term used in social work/psychology circles, homeostasis, which means that we tend to be most comfortable in a non-changing environment and when things change, we work towards returning to the known state.

Perhaps your daughter, since she's always lived in her small-town environment, doesn't know what it feels like to live outside of her comfort zone, therefore she doesn't concern herself with what she has no experience with. Yes, I am over-analyzing things...it's what I do best.
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Old 11-14-2012, 09:49 AM   #81
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My kids go to a very small Catholic school, with no "gifted" or "AP" classes. Algebra is standard, however, starting 1st quarter of 7th grade. So, an 8th grader taking Algebra is nothing, IMO...they also do Geometry in 8th grade, OP - sounds like your kid is in a very basic school. I wouldn't worry about anything more than sending her to a public school with more opportunities around you..
That is what I was thinking reading the entire thread. Our "completely average" kids take Algebra starting in 7th grade. That is our school's curriculum.
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Old 11-14-2012, 10:19 AM   #82
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we're also in NY (Rochester) and in our school district algebra is the regular curriculum in 7th and 8th grade.

OP I think the first step should be having your DD's IQ officially tested and then to speak to a guidance counselor at your school to see what the options are. I personally think social skills are important also, not just academics. Also, colleges look for well rounded kids so she should get into some clubs, volunteering, etc.
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Old 11-14-2012, 10:39 AM   #83
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Originally Posted by NHdisneylover View Post
From the OP and her follow ups it does not sound like the OP has focused on much other than how much sooner her child dose everything than other kids.
Childhood should not be a race to finish early, it should be a process to get the most TOTAL, whole being out of in those brief 18 years.
I couldn't agree more.
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Old 11-14-2012, 10:57 AM   #84
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That is what I was thinking reading the entire thread. Our "completely average" kids take Algebra starting in 7th grade. That is our school's curriculum.
Which is why the OP is trying to get her kid in a different district I think. Here in MO schools are wildly different with urban, small town, & the burbs as far as curriculum. I don't blame here one bit for getting out of a district that is so limited.

The fact that the school had no "gifted program" to help point the parent in the right direction did not help OP either.

I hate to keep saying it but that is why the SAT & ACT test will give the OP relatively quick assessment of where her dd sits nationally & then OP can proceed from there.

Look into Duke Tip and John Hopkins! I do know with Duke Tip you could get a letter of invite from them via your guidance counselor. If she is not in 6th grade yet then you are good.

The kicker is you have to take the test in Dec. because that is the deadline date. If she were to get a perfect score, you are looking at scholarship $ which is not unheard of. Also I do think the deadline date was Oct. for Duke Tip now that I think about it, but I would still look into it. Maybe John's Hokins program has something there. I do not know anything about that I am sure that is what your area of the country uses.

My dd took the ACT in 6th and got near a perfect score on the "english" part, no surprise there.

We went to there ceremony thing and a few kids got perfect scores at 11/12yo.



So I would tell you to start looking into that.
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Old 11-14-2012, 11:39 AM   #85
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I certainly have a kid who does not like the whole "highschool thing" and she WILL be happier in a more adult environment. But even she had things she would miss in every area we lived up and has been reluctant to move. A few close friends, karate schools, girl scout troops, etc. It appears from the OP that this girl has lived pretty much her entire life in one place--if NOTHING there,at age 11,causes her to feel she does not want to leave, it would seem that she has not been helped/encouraged to find things and places and people that she can connect with.
The OPs dd is 11, in an 8th grade class. Mom is a single parentin a small town, with 500 kids in K-12. That's 38 kids per grade. When you have that small of a peer group, you just don't have a ton of options, and what's available will just have the same peer group over and over again.

Clearly, the school is not prepared for academically advanced kids. And the more posters argue that OPs kid may not be THAT academically advanced, the more that means that the child's peer group is even further removed from her academically. I mean, if OPs dd was gifted or bright, rather than profoundly gifted, what does that say about the school system that says they cannot handle it? It says that in a spread over 13 years, they do not have a single student that is even close to OP's dd academically. Sorry, that doesn't mean that the dd is a failure socially. It could mean that she would welcome being in a peer group that is closer to her level of intelligence. Wouldn't you?

OP, I do agree with others that you need to get a quantitative feel for her level of intelligence. She could be profoundly gifted, gifted, or just plain bright. Here, 8th graders take the classes you listed (my own dd, who is in no way, shape or form gifted, took Honors Algebra in 7th) so that doesn't prove anything. Neither does potty-training or when they learn to read. But I do think that you absolutely need to find a place where you can get a larger peer group for your dd. One that will have more kids that are closer to her academic level. You say that a jobs a job, but many areas that have better schools also have a significantly higher cost of living. I'd give up the idea of raising another Doogie Howser graduating med school at 16, and instead focus on finding a high school that will work for her.
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Old 11-14-2012, 12:00 PM   #86
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The OPs dd is 11, in an 8th grade class. Mom is a single parentin a small town, with 500 kids in K-12. That's 38 kids per grade. When you have that small of a peer group, you just don't have a ton of options, and what's available will just have the same peer group over and over again.

Clearly, the school is not prepared for academically advanced kids. And the more posters argue that OPs kid may not be THAT academically advanced, the more that means that the child's peer group is even further removed from her academically. I mean, if OPs dd was gifted or bright, rather than profoundly gifted, what does that say about the school system that says they cannot handle it? It says that in a spread over 13 years, they do not have a single student that is even close to OP's dd academically. Sorry, that doesn't mean that the dd is a failure socially. It could mean that she would welcome being in a peer group that is closer to her level of intelligence. Wouldn't you?OP, I do agree with others that you need to get a quantitative feel for her level of intelligence. She could be profoundly gifted, gifted, or just plain bright. Here, 8th graders take the classes you listed (my own dd, who is in no way, shape or form gifted, took Honors Algebra in 7th) so that doesn't prove anything. Neither does potty-training or when they learn to read. But I do think that you absolutely need to find a place where you can get a larger peer group for your dd. One that will have more kids that are closer to her academic level. You say that a jobs a job, but many areas that have better schools also have a significantly higher cost of living. I'd give up the idea of raising another Doogie Howser graduating med school at 16, and instead focus on finding a high school that will work for her.
I dont disagree with you that moving might help the OP's DD expand her network socially esp if the area is very small town but....

I disagree with the bolded statement. I want my kids to be friends with and interact with everyone from all levels! I want them to be able to interact with people, all people. The working world will be very diverse and even the smartest person in the world needs to communicate to those around them. And many people come in their own much later. I know many people who were in lower tracks than myself in HS who are now VERY successful business people. So intelligence is great and having a stimulating conversation with an intellectual equal is fun but there is more to life and people need to be more well-rounded than that.

I know a doctor who is suppose to be extremely brilliant. But he is also a complete arrogant tool. He does not know how to talk to his patients bc he feels he is so much smarter than them, and he probably is, but he puts them off.
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Old 11-14-2012, 12:18 PM   #87
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I have an 11 yr old she is currently in the 8th grade taking 3 high classes. Algabra, biology and french 1. She attends a public school. While having a meeting with school last week reguarding history the guidence counsler and principal...told me that the school can no longer meet her needs and we should look at other options for high school. So now I have to figure out what the best option would be for her.

I am open to any and all ideas. I am willing to move just about anywhere. Only requirement is that i need to find a job but i dont care what i do.

Options i've started looking at:

combination of continuing at our public sublimented with online courses


private high schools both all girl and co-ed.

I am tring to find but with no luck yet the high school where u get your hish school diploma and associates degree at the same time.

Her ultimate goal is to go to Harvard and to be a Pediatric cardilogist or heart transplant surgeon and maybe on her days off she would work as a flight surgeon on a med flight helicopter.
What about community college classes? Otherwise, many of the elite private schools (not meaning parochial) have scholarship and financial aid available. While it sounds like you have a gifted child, has she been tested? For eighth grade, those classes sound great but not terribly advanced. My average seventh grader was offered French 1 (chose spanish) and is in pre-algebra. Also, have you asked the school why they can't meet her needs? Personally, I have very little tolerance for bright and gifted kids getting the shaft at school (most teachers I know do too). I know current laws and testing have schools focusing on troubled kids, but focusing on good kids is worth fighting for imho.

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Old 11-14-2012, 12:22 PM   #88
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Reading the Algebra comment, I have to agree. I started being taught it in 4th grade (I was in a special program) and took a full load of it in 6th.

Also, has she learned to write long papers, and give presentations? Those are standard in college. I actually wrote an 8 page paper in 5th grade, and have to give an hour long presentation along with a hands on activity. We all had too. It was in a public school as well.

It could just be your daughter needs to attend a public high school with a tougher schedule.
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Old 11-14-2012, 12:31 PM   #89
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mine either



i had the same reaction




Its over an hour away and not really the enviroment id want her in they actually have state police stationed in the school due to problems.
Most schools do have a police officer on staff. It doesn't mean the school is bad. Have you checked out the environment yourself? I went to a school considered dangerous to outsiders and while there were some rough kids, the bright kids were sheltered away from it all…and those schools tend to have amazing opportunities (it's whether you capitalize on them). Anyhoo…your daughter being much younger than the typical freshmen may be a problem though.
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Old 11-14-2012, 12:45 PM   #90
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Clearly, the school is not prepared for academically advanced kids. And the more posters argue that OPs kid may not be THAT academically advanced, the more that means that the child's peer group is even further removed from her academically. I mean, if OPs dd was gifted or bright, rather than profoundly gifted, what does that say about the school system that says they cannot handle it? It says that in a spread over 13 years, they do not have a single student that is even close to OP's dd academically.
I don't buy it. In a school of 500, if you take the (generally) accepted 3-5% of students being gifted, there should be round about 15-25 students from K-12 who will come under the gifted label. I know that's just a statistic and MAYBE this school has never seen a gifted child before, but I'm calling bull. It's *possible* that every single gifted child at that school has been ignored and the school has a history of crying "we can't fill their needs!", but honestly, I don't believe it. I'd love to hear the school's side to all this!
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