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Old 12-07-2012, 07:37 AM   #826
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Jen...hugs to you!!! Hrh needed stitches when she was two. She was very close with my paramedic friend who happened to meet us in the er to help me hold her...he passed out..a medic! He said it killed him to hold her and hear her scream. You go girl.you kept it together...we can always fall apart behind closed doors
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Old 12-07-2012, 07:44 AM   #827
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Hugs all around today ...

Sarah, thinking of you today with only the best wishes for a quick procedure and even speedier recovery! Lots of love to you.


Jen, hope DD slept well and is feeling better today.


Melissa, hoping for a smooth and easy procedure today for your DS.


IHTM: Good luck today, hope you recieve positive support today and that the school takes action immediately.

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Originally Posted by i_heart_the_mouse View Post
Jenny - Wanted to mention since you asked, on Wednesday the teacher had a talk with the other kid. She presumably told him that DS told on him. Great move letting the kid know that he has been told on, but do nothing to discipline him.
Seriously?? If so, that teacher needs a reprimand!
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Old 12-07-2012, 07:51 AM   #828
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Sarah...you are always in our prayers...milkshake party soon
to BOTH! When Sarah feels better and you aren't working 'round the clock, we will shake it up!!
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Old 12-07-2012, 09:06 AM   #829
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Originally Posted by i_heart_the_mouse View Post
I hope the procedure and recovery are quick and easy

Jenny - Wanted to mention since you asked, on Wednesday the teacher had a talk with the other kid. She presumably told him that DS told on him. Great move letting the kid know that he has been told on, but do nothing to discipline him.
At least with the schools around here, they are not legally allowed to give any information like that to other students or parents. I would ask to have him moved out of her class. That teacher is putting his safety at risk. She's not just ignoring the situation, she's making it worse by letting the bully know who's getting him in trouble. Your DS needs to be away from both the teacher and the other kid. If the bully was the only issue, I would suggest you make them move him. Since the teacher is almost as much of a problem, I would suggest moving your DS.

I'll be thinking of you today and sending good thoughts, prayers of strength and pixie dust your way.


My DH was so cute last night. He thought he got a pin code in his email, but it was just the current deal that runs from January through March 2013. He did get an email to register to win 3 years of DVC. He had me to the entering for him, but I'm wondering if I can enter as me. I'm just afraid to since we have the same home address and phone number, even if our email addresses are different.
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Old 12-07-2012, 09:49 AM   #830
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Your being way to hard on yourself. I think you are doing a perfect job with the situation. Just stay calm, and keep talking until someone does something about it.
I'm trying, but I'm just not sure it's enough.

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Okay....nipple twisting??? This is freaking ridiculous. How did the bully know your son had told you? Stick to your guns, I don't know how you can contain yourself but hang in there and give them heck tomorrow.

DD4 just woke up crying saying her chin was really hurting. To be expected I guess. We gave her some Tylenol and she's gone back to sleep.

Thanks everyone for caring, you are a special group of ladies.
Poor DD. I hope she isn't in too much pain today.

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Our best wishes go out to our Pioneer Girl Sarah Jungle Cruiser today - we're all thinking of you
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Trying to catch up here...

jen Poor DD!!! That must have been horrifying to watch!
I'm glad it wasn't worse. I hope she is feeling better soon and heals quickly!

ihtm I hope the admin takes you seriously and does something about this kid. I feel so bad for your son, I am glad he's telling you what's going on though.

sarah good luck today. Hope you are feeling better soon!!

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I haven't heard back about my raise yet (our director actually went home early yesterday with that vomiting bug I had last week...not pretty! ) But, depending on what he comes back with, I may be YC CL too!

I'm up bright and early...had my annual physical yesterday and have to go and get my bloodwork today, so I'm gonna do it early, before work and get it over with. I hate needles and the last time bloodwork was ordered I avoided it for 6 months! I'll be a good girl this time and go get it done and over with.
Bloodwork. Good for you for being on it though! An ounce of prevention and all that jazz...

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Originally Posted by pas130 View Post
I heart....omg kids like that make me want to homeschool...so sorry your ds is experiencing this abuse. This older boy has serious problems and needs to get out of mainstream schools...
The kid is actually in his class which is making it harder. Homeschooling is officially on the table as of this morning.

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Originally Posted by pas130 View Post
Jen...hugs to you!!! Hrh needed stitches when she was two. She was very close with my paramedic friend who happened to meet us in the er to help me hold her...he passed out..a medic! He said it killed him to hold her and hear her scream. You go girl.you kept it together...we can always fall apart behind closed doors
Awww, poor little girl. It's kinda cute how the little ones have the power to bring the toughest of tough to their knees.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Janet B View Post
Hugs all around today ...

Sarah, thinking of you today with only the best wishes for a quick procedure and even speedier recovery! Lots of love to you.


Jen, hope DD slept well and is feeling better today.


Melissa, hoping for a smooth and easy procedure today for your DS.


IHTM: Good luck today, hope you recieve positive support today and that the school takes action immediately.



Seriously?? If so, that teacher needs a reprimand!
I made my opinion on the teacher well known today. I hope the principal heard me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by letthewookiewin View Post
At least with the schools around here, they are not legally allowed to give any information like that to other students or parents. I would ask to have him moved out of her class. That teacher is putting his safety at risk. She's not just ignoring the situation, she's making it worse by letting the bully know who's getting him in trouble. Your DS needs to be away from both the teacher and the other kid. If the bully was the only issue, I would suggest you make them move him. Since the teacher is almost as much of a problem, I would suggest moving your DS.

I'll be thinking of you today and sending good thoughts, prayers of strength and pixie dust your way.


My DH was so cute last night. He thought he got a pin code in his email, but it was just the current deal that runs from January through March 2013. He did get an email to register to win 3 years of DVC. He had me to the entering for him, but I'm wondering if I can enter as me. I'm just afraid to since we have the same home address and phone number, even if our email addresses are different.
I never thought about a class switch. I think I may have to request that. Thanks for the idea.

I think I'd enter as him must to be on the safe side. Wow, wouldn't that be an awesome win!


So anyway....

I don't want to bog you guys down with too many details, but here's a nice paraphrased tidbit from my convo the principal.

Me: DS is concerned because he knows the school rule is automatic suspension for physical violence and he sees that the other kid has not been suspended.

Her: I'm not sure that that policy applicable in this situation since no other witnesses reported any of the incidents and DS didn't tell anyone here at school when any of this happened.

Me: Wait, suspension is off the table?

Her: Well, not off of the table, but... I can't discuss this with you anymore

DH is through the roof. I'm trying to remain calm and it's not working.
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Old 12-07-2012, 10:09 AM   #831
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Originally Posted by i_heart_the_mouse View Post
I'm trying, but I'm just not sure it's enough.



Poor DD. I hope she isn't in too much pain today.



Yes



Bloodwork. Good for you for being on it though! An ounce of prevention and all that jazz...



The kid is actually in his class which is making it harder. Homeschooling is officially on the table as of this morning.



Awww, poor little girl. It's kinda cute how the little ones have the power to bring the toughest of tough to their knees.



I made my opinion on the teacher well known today. I hope the principal heard me.



I never thought about a class switch. I think I may have to request that. Thanks for the idea.

I think I'd enter as him must to be on the safe side. Wow, wouldn't that be an awesome win!


So anyway....

I don't want to bog you guys down with too many details, but here's a nice paraphrased tidbit from my convo the principal.

Me: DS is concerned because he knows the school rule is automatic suspension for physical violence and he sees that the other kid has not been suspended.

Her: I'm not sure that that policy applicable in this situation since no other witnesses reported any of the incidents and DS didn't tell anyone here at school when any of this happened.

Me: Wait, suspension is off the table?

Her: Well, not off of the table, but... I can't discuss this with you anymore

DH is through the roof. I'm trying to remain calm and it's not working.
NOT APPLICABLE??????? I'm so confused....
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Old 12-07-2012, 10:13 AM   #832
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to all of you. Sorry there seems to be a lot of not-so-nice happenings going on. We've got a tough, whip-smart buncha chicas here though, so I know everything'll be alright in the end. You're in my thoughts.

Sarah: to you. Positive vibes to you by the truckload today. Look forward to an update. Hoping the recovery is lickety-split.

Melissa: And the same to your DS. Let us know.

I_Heart: Wow. That is a pathetic and totally unacceptable response. Can you get a meeting with their teacher and the principal together? With all the recent focus on bullying, it angers me to no end that any child should be subjected to such torment at school; schools should be safe havens for learning which foster respect. That sort of behaviour should be instantly and heavily reprimanded. So sorry you're dealing with this. I hope you can get a resolution to it soon.

Jen: How's tough-cookie DD this morning?!
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Old 12-07-2012, 10:14 AM   #833
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Janet B View Post
to BOTH! When Sarah feels better and you aren't working 'round the clock, we will shake it up!!


Quote:
Originally Posted by i_heart_the_mouse View Post
The kid is actually in his class which is making it harder. Homeschooling is officially on the table as of this morning.



Awww, poor little girl. It's kinda cute how the little ones have the power to bring the toughest of tough to their knees.



I made my opinion on the teacher well known today. I hope the principal heard me.



I never thought about a class switch. I think I may have to request that. Thanks for the idea.

I think I'd enter as him must to be on the safe side. Wow, wouldn't that be an awesome win!


So anyway....

I don't want to bog you guys down with too many details, but here's a nice paraphrased tidbit from my convo the principal.

Me: DS is concerned because he knows the school rule is automatic suspension for physical violence and he sees that the other kid has not been suspended.

Her: I'm not sure that that policy applicable in this situation since no other witnesses reported any of the incidents and DS didn't tell anyone here at school when any of this happened.

Me: Wait, suspension is off the table?

Her: Well, not off of the table, but... I can't discuss this with you anymore

DH is through the roof. I'm trying to remain calm and it's not working.
I do understand they can't discuss the punishment with you...but no witnesses...he didn't tell school...what the........................

I am sorry...she did go to school to teach children...I am sure she has heard of bullying, seriously!!!!

I think it's time to threaten legal action...ok not threaten...suggest perhaps!

I am SO sorry your Principal is not being proactive at all, violence should never be tolerated
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Old 12-07-2012, 11:04 AM   #834
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DH called and got a meeting set up for this afternoon with the principal and DS's teacher. He thinks I'm not being firm enough. He also said his first impression after speaking with the principal was that there is serious butt covering going on. The question is why and what?

Bullying is such a hot topic. You would think they would be bending over backwards to protect an innocent child?????

Here's another winner.

Her: We can put all kinds of interventions, rules and discipline in place but the bottom line is that when the other kid is alone it's on him to control his own behavior. We cannot control what he does and DS needs to be able to know what to do to get away and get help. I will inform him that he is allowed to break school rules to keep himself safe.

Me: Wait, what?

pas - When you say legal action, what exactly do you mean? I do know that they can't tell me about the other kid's discipline, so I'm not sure what that means. If I can't know what they are doing, how do I know DS is safe? It is starting to feel like the bully has more rights then DS.

Do I just say if there is another incident I will be getting a lawyer? I know I sound dumb, but I'm confused and angry and not thinking straight.
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Old 12-07-2012, 11:16 AM   #835
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Quote:
Originally Posted by i_heart_the_mouse View Post
DH called and got a meeting set up for this afternoon with the principal and DS's teacher. He thinks I'm not being firm enough. He also said his first impression after speaking with the principal was that there is serious butt covering going on. The question is why and what?

Bullying is such a hot topic. You would think they would be bending over backwards to protect an innocent child?????

Here's another winner.

Her: We can put all kinds of interventions, rules and discipline in place but the bottom line is that when the other kid is alone it's on him to control his own behavior. We cannot control what he does and DS needs to be able to know what to do to get away and get help. I will inform him that he is allowed to break school rules to keep himself safe.

Me: Wait, what?

pas - When you say legal action, what exactly do you mean? I do know that they can't tell me about the other kid's discipline, so I'm not sure what that means. If I can't know what they are doing, how do I know DS is safe? It is starting to feel like the bully has more rights then DS.

Do I just say if there is another incident I will be getting a lawyer? I know I sound dumb, but I'm confused and angry and not thinking straight.
I agree with your DH...they are covering something up...this kid probably has multiple issues and/or parents that are not helping the situation...I will say that I have told my own kids to protect themselves and I will not punish them for that.

It is the school's responsibility to keep children safe..her response is ridiculous, and let her know you are keeping written track of incidents and meetings, and fully prepared to go to the Superintendent, and escalate to consulting a lawyer if they can't help you. Ask her if she feels you are better off pressing charges with the police for battery...how about sexual assault....nipple twisting. I may sound extreme....but sometimes when you use certain "words" it can trigger a response..and hopefully some action!

When I am being blown off...I do let my DH take the lead...he gets the job done..when I tend to be the "nicer" parent to deal with.
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Old 12-07-2012, 11:23 AM   #836
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DH called and got a meeting set up for this afternoon with the principal and DS's teacher. He thinks I'm not being firm enough. He also said his first impression after speaking with the principal was that there is serious butt covering going on. The question is why and what?

Bullying is such a hot topic. You would think they would be bending over backwards to protect an innocent child?????

Here's another winner.

Her: We can put all kinds of interventions, rules and discipline in place but the bottom line is that when the other kid is alone it's on him to control his own behavior. We cannot control what he does and DS needs to be able to know what to do to get away and get help. I will inform him that he is allowed to break school rules to keep himself safe.

Me: Wait, what?

pas - When you say legal action, what exactly do you mean? I do know that they can't tell me about the other kid's discipline, so I'm not sure what that means. If I can't know what they are doing, how do I know DS is safe? It is starting to feel like the bully has more rights then DS.

Do I just say if there is another incident I will be getting a lawyer? I know I sound dumb, but I'm confused and angry and not thinking straight.
Not pas but I'll throw in my 2 cents. What I hinted at was that I would hold the school, teacher and principal legally responsible (that read to them financially) for anything that happened to DD since they had been made aware of the violence. This was about 15 years ago and bullying wasn't such a talked about issue as it is today. As I mentioned, the school handled it right away with the boy and his parents .... and it never happened again. Now to be perfectly honest DS who is 2 years older also had a little "talk" with the student so I'm really not sure which action worked .... but it stopped and that's all I cared about.

P.S. DS did not hurt the boy but made it very well known that this would never again happen to his sister!
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Old 12-07-2012, 01:24 PM   #837
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Quote:
Originally Posted by i_heart_the_mouse View Post
DH called and got a meeting set up for this afternoon with the principal and DS's teacher. He thinks I'm not being firm enough. He also said his first impression after speaking with the principal was that there is serious butt covering going on. The question is why and what?

Bullying is such a hot topic. You would think they would be bending over backwards to protect an innocent child?????

Here's another winner.

Her: We can put all kinds of interventions, rules and discipline in place but the bottom line is that when the other kid is alone it's on him to control his own behavior. We cannot control what he does and DS needs to be able to know what to do to get away and get help. I will inform him that he is allowed to break school rules to keep himself safe.

Me: Wait, what?
It sounds like this other child has figured out ways to get around the system. He thinks that if it's only him and your child, with no witnesses, he won't get into trouble. I would tell them, you want to limit the opportunities this other child has to get your child alone. It sounds like they already know the bullying happens when he can get your child alone. Since they are totally aware, they are legally responsible to stop the situation.

My oldest DS would kill me if he knew I told anyone about this, but last year, he had a girl in one of his classes that we had issues with. It was a teen leadership class. Instead of the desks being in rows, they were in several circular groups. He was grouped with this one girl that kept poking him with pencils (and leaving marks) and clawing him with her nails enough to bring blood to the surface. He kept trying to keep from me what was going on. It wasn't until I had a hammer hovering above his (at the time) favorite XBOX 360 game that he admitted a girl was doing it to him in class. He is my sweet child and is way shy. He said he didn't say or do anything to her to make her do what she was doing. When someone else in his circle would make her stop, the other student would say it was b/c she was a crazy "witch". I made him tell me the girl's name and I called and talked to the assistant principal, with one call they moved her out of his group. There was no need to change classes in his case since it was only a semester long class and the semester was almost over. The ironic thing to me was that the girl's name was Honor. There she was clawing my son, or stabbing him with pencils, on a daily basis and her name was Honor when she obviously had no clue what her own name meant.



Quote:
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pas - When you say legal action, what exactly do you mean? I do know that they can't tell me about the other kid's discipline, so I'm not sure what that means. If I can't know what they are doing, how do I know DS is safe? It is starting to feel like the bully has more rights then DS.

Do I just say if there is another incident I will be getting a lawyer? I know I sound dumb, but I'm confused and angry and not thinking straight.
Well, they aren't legally supposed to even mention the name of the other child. You, and your DH, can say the name of the other child all you would like, but any school official can't. Which is a good thing b/c it means they can't legally tell the other kids parent's that it is your child their child is bullying. The last thing you need is angry parents to come yelling at you about how your child has to be telling lies b/c their perfect little angel could never bully even a fly. (Ugh, I hate parent's like that. It's the main reason I stopped working in day care, and didn't want to become a teacher.)

Let us know how it went. I'll be sending all the good thoughts, prayers, and pixie dust I can muster to you and your DH.
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Old 12-07-2012, 02:38 PM   #838
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I am exhausted but just wanted to stop in quickly again.


Jen - so sorry to hear about DD! How scary! I hope her little chin feeling better today.

I_heart - I can't believe what is happening! I hope it gets resolved and your DS can have bully free days!!!! My friend called me hysterical last night that one of the boys in their neighborhood pushed her son down walking home from school yesterday, I just don't get why some kids think its okay to be violent!!!


DS is doing well and they pushed proactive antibiotics during the endoscopy so hopefully no ER today the bad news is that his stomach is not any better and he has to stay on all his meds and probably even up his doses we'll know more when we get the biopsy results. Such a helpless feeling!!!

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Old 12-07-2012, 02:46 PM   #839
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Sarah sending you lots of extra well wishes and hugs! No need to look for Janet and me at WDW ..... we know where to find you!!!

Jen so sorry about you DD ... glad she is okay. Stay strong mama there will be many more accidents .... sorry for the bad news .... but just my experience .... also the kiddos always make it thru better than mama!

wookie do you by any chance have instructions for the mickey head scarf you made? If so, maybe you could pm them to me or pm me and I'll send you my email.

Quiet afternoon today .... just sitting on the couch addressing Christmas cards for my DL Diva group. Only about 20 of us signed up for the exchange so that isn't too much to do. As of now there are 70 ladies signed up for the Diva trip!!! I'm very shy .... not sure how I'll handle this .... (worried look on my face)

Have a good afternoon/evening ladies!
I really, really want to go on that Diva trip, Linda!!! Maybe....just maybe I can talk DH into letting just ME go next yr/ in January (that's when they usually are, right?) for the next one!!! I'd be your roomie, if you'd like to stay at Disney Land Hotel with me That's where I gotta stay when I go! How many days are the Diva trips? Is there enough to do for about 5 days?? or will I be awfully bored with that many days on my itinerary?? hmmmm...my birthday is January 29....so I think that would be a perfect birthday/christmas gift combined!!! now....just to convince DH!!!!!
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Old 12-07-2012, 03:11 PM   #840
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Originally Posted by chimo2u View Post
I really, really want to go on that Diva trip, Linda!!! Maybe....just maybe I can talk DH into letting just ME go next yr/ in January (that's when they usually are, right?) for the next one!!! I'd be your roomie, if you'd like to stay at Disney Land Hotel with me That's where I gotta stay when I go! How many days are the Diva trips? Is there enough to do for about 5 days?? or will I be awfully bored with that many days on my itinerary?? hmmmm...my birthday is January 29....so I think that would be a perfect birthday/christmas gift combined!!! now....just to convince DH!!!!!

This year the DIVA trip is Wednesday, Feb 27th thru Sunday, March 3rd. Not everyone is there the entire time. Meals and/or activities are planned for all those days. You're free to join in as many or few things as you want. They also do a tee shirt that one of the DIVAs and her son design. This year DD is going with me for a couple of the days but she's not as into it as I am so I'm not sure just how many group activities I'll do on those days. I still need to buy a tiara for the princess photo .... I don't think DD is too thrilled about that one!!! One of the DIVAs is traveling thru Sacramento today and a bunch of us local folks are meeting her for dinner so at least I will have met a couple of people. I'll let you know what I think of the trip after I get back.
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