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Old 10-11-2012, 08:27 PM   #46
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Originally Posted by lukenick1 View Post
Yes exactly....his being small doesn't give him much strength behind his hits. Although he is a great hitter, he just doesn't have the strength to hit the ball out of the park like some of the big kids can do. He is very good as a short stop, or any infield position and he is a lefty pitcher. He does have assets.

I also want to add, one of his friends is 5'5 and weighs 125lbs at 11 years old. The kid is bigger than me! Granted his parents are both very tall people. My hubby is 5'7 and I am 5'4 so there isn't much hope for my boy to be a big kid.
I would highly recommend he try lacrosse. It is a fast moving sport and favors the more nimble. And if he is a left handed pitcher, left handed shooters are always an asset.

As for the present, don't refer to the team as the "reject" team. Encourage him to use his skills to be a leader.

My son didn't make the Elite squad for lacrosse one year, while all his friends did. At first he was disappointed, but he ended up having the best year. He was the big fish, the starter, the one the others looked up to. He had a blast that year. It may be better than you are anticipating.
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Old 10-11-2012, 10:03 PM   #47
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Ya know......
As hard as it was for him to be rejected from majors, he had an amazing season in minors while some of his friends struggled. It made him stronger for the next season and then he was picked for majors. He even got nominated for all-stars (but couldn't commit and be on the team because of vacation). Your right.....it all works out for a reason!
Okay, so he DID make a team in each instance, just not the one he wanted to be on? With all due respect, IMHO, there is difference between being rejected, and not getting what you want. That's really an important life session.
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Old 10-11-2012, 10:35 PM   #48
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You have my sympathy. We went through something similar with DD9. She is a ballet student and she wasn't getting roles in productions with her previous ballet studio simply because she was above average in height. (55") They didn't care about talent at all - only if you fit the costume. We ended up switching studios where they base things on ability - not height. But, we were very sad to have to leave and it was hard to say goodbye to teachers and old friends.

And, as far as baseball is concerned, size definitely does matter. DH coaches Babe Ruth (ages 13-15) and he would tell you that if you have 2 kids with the exact SAME skill level and work ethic that the tall child would be a bigger asset to your team. A tall kid in the infield is often the difference between an out or a hit. It's a lot different than when they were little and couldn't hit very far. Of course, it's my very average sized DS13 who is the baseball fanatic. We are a small town so everyone gets to play, but even average sized he is at a disadvantage compared to some of his taller peers.

I tried to convince them to switch passions. DD is much faster than her brother and with her size could really hit that ball. And, as a male, DS could have all the ballet roles he wanted. But, alas, they didn't go for it.

I wish your son the best in whatever he decides to do.
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Old 10-12-2012, 08:46 AM   #49
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Okay, so he DID make a team in each instance, just not the one he wanted to be on? With all due respect, IMHO, there is difference between being rejected, and not getting what you want. That's really an important life session.
He was rejected from getting into the Majors in baseball. The kids who don't make Majors have to play Minors. In the basketball case he was rejected from Suburban League and got bumped down to CYO. If they didn't have enough kids to make a "C" team he would have been cut. Wasn't a matter of what he "wanted" it was a matter of not getting on to the competitive teams.
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Old 10-12-2012, 08:48 AM   #50
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I would highly recommend he try lacrosse. It is a fast moving sport and favors the more nimble. And if he is a left handed pitcher, left handed shooters are always an asset.

As for the present, don't refer to the team as the "reject" team. Encourage him to use his skills to be a leader.

My son didn't make the Elite squad for lacrosse one year, while all his friends did. At first he was disappointed, but he ended up having the best year. He was the big fish, the starter, the one the others looked up to. He had a blast that year. It may be better than you are anticipating.
For reasons unbeknownst to me, he despises Lacrosse and everything about it.
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Old 10-12-2012, 09:45 AM   #51
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Heck, the kid is already bigger than Muggsy Bogues!

Play for whatever team will give him playing time . . .
I was going to mention Muggsy, too! His story inspires my own short basketball player so much. - His real name is Tyrone Bogues, he's 5'4" and played for the Charlotte Hornets. If you Google him, you should hit on the school he coaches at now, and even be able to e-mail him.

Anyway, DS played town rec league last year, on the "B-team" (we only have A and B), and still ended up enjoying it and learning a lot. This year, he plans to move up to a travel league through the Y, and then next year maybe try out for the more competive travel team.

There is a niche in basketball for the short guy - you just need to really know how to fill it, and practice a lot. Good luck to your son!
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Old 10-12-2012, 09:53 AM   #52
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there are other things to do besides those sports that require a good athletic kid...
Soccer is a good choice as already stated..

How about a karate group...they go at their own pace and no one is judged by their peers..

Swimming too...kids really excel when they are just themselves at first...never can tell that he could join a team in HS...

Good luck...
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Old 10-12-2012, 09:57 AM   #53
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Not every child gets chosen for every team, production, or whatever. That's life. And those that have learned to deal with 'rejection' are really better off in the long run. I see those 'golden' children, who got every single thing they wanted.....prime teams, perfect positions, the lead in school shows, etc.....and they are now having extreme issues with having to deal with lesser spots in colleges. Some have even left school due to it's not living up to expectations.

My dd is almost 5'11'' tall...she is a theatre major. And let me tell you how many times she has learnt to deal with rejection. Anne of Green Gables??? Yeah, she would have been a perfect Anne...has the red hair, freckles, etc., but she was too tall and would make everyone else look like pygmies. So, they brought in a lesser actress, with blond hair that they dyed red, who couldn't sing, and made my dd a minor townsperson, in the background so that she wouldn't detract from the chosen 'Anne'...that was the only show my dd ever quit.
When she finally got a lead, a year ago, (due to the usual lead girls temper tantrum and not auditioning), many people came up to me and asked why dd had never been cast before?? That she was incredible, and what a waste it was to have her in the background. Well...that's the way the cookie crumbles in theatre. She knows that..and is prepared to go ahead anyway.
So....let your children be rejected. Support them, encourage them to stick with that activity. But please, don't tell them how stupid the coaches (or whatever) are, that their child is wonderful and talented and that they should have been chosen over others that are less talented. Believe me...coaches very seldom allow a talented player sit on the sidelines. Sure, a less talented player may be left behind in order to allow a similar player to be chosen due to politics. But a player that has talent and is gifted will not be left sitting.
Many parents allow their children they are the best thing since sliced bread. Let me share a story with you...
For my dd's entire life, I have told her that she will most likely not be a leading lady on Broadway...due to her height. I have always given her constructive critisicm...she didn't always like it, but if I saw room for improvement or if I saw her doing something that wasn't quite right, I told her. I always told her how wonderfully she had done if that was appropriate as well. I was never mean or nasty..just truthfull. It is my job as her parent to be sure she is grounded.
Well....when we went to her college freshman production a few weeks ago, this is what I told her following the show...'Kate, for the first time ever, I saw only the character...I never saw Kate!! Terrific job.' She jumped up and down and screamed!!! She was so happy. I asked her if it was worth hearing the less than stellar comments I made to her over the years. Oh yes, it was she said...she now understood what I had been trying to tell her...when I say you did something truly great, you'll know I mean it.
So, support those kids, but keep your expectations where they should be. Allow your children to do the best they can do, even if it's less than you think it should be. And when they are rejected, or don't go as high as they may want..support them and try to give them ideas as to how to improve. Then, when they give a truly wonderful performance, they will really believe what you say. This whole 'everyone gets a trophy or a prize' mentality just has to stop.
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Old 10-12-2012, 11:33 AM   #54
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Tennis? Fencing? Rowing? I think he'll have more of a chance at scholarships in the 'lesser known' sports too.
There are a ton of other sports he can try. If he is truly athletically gifted, he can probably excel in other sports.
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Old 10-12-2012, 11:40 AM   #55
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Honestly it sounds like her ds has a lot going for him. I don't know that he needs to find something new. We don't have to excel at everything we like to do. Sometimes it should just be for the joy of doing it.

If your son really loves to play basketball, for instance, what difference does it really make if he is on the more competitive team? And does it really matter that much to HIM or more to YOU? (not meaning to be snarky, I know how easy it is for something to mean more to us than it really does to our kids). If he just loves to play, just let him enjoy the team he is on.

If he wants to improve his skills in that sport, let him. But, it has to come from him otherwise you are just wasting your time. If he is happy at the level he is playing at, don't push it.

If you really think its all political, find another league or accept it for what it is.

I do agree with the pp, that even with politics, a truly talented kid is going to shine through. It may take a little longer, but his time will come.
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Old 10-12-2012, 12:08 PM   #56
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I can totally relate to this. I have a DS13 who has just reached 5 feet tall. He is one of the smallest in his class. He too plays baseball and basketball and knows he has to make up for his size in other ways.

Baseball - He has been playing since he was 4. Loves the game. Has always played Rec Teams for for School. Last year he wanted to try out for traveling team but did not make it. Tried out again this year and is on the team. I have really seen improvements in him the last couple of years. He is fast and loves stealing. At the end of this season his coach told him that he was his "go to guy". He knew he could put Alex in any position on that field and he could play it.

Basketball - Little tougher being small. This is my DS's 4th year on the school team. They have a big team (17 kids) so playing time is not all even. A few years ago he would be put in here an dthere. Now he is one of the starters. He has continued to really practice and I have sent him to a few Basketball Camps. He is fast and can steal the ball really well. It's amazing how many times he comes up with the ball when the other players are towering over him. He was on a summer league this year with only 6 kids on the team. Well, they pretty much played the entire game with small breaks. He learned so much from this and just having all that playing time really helped him get better and increase his confidence.

So, I guess. I would say. Don't give up. He may be at the top of this C-team and that means he will get lots of playing time. That is only going to make him better. Don't let his size deter him. Just have him concentrate on the things he can control.
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Old 10-12-2012, 12:09 PM   #57
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Athletics are so competitive now and I hate it. My son plays basketball in a couple leagues and he's happy as long as he's playing. He's very good. We have a court in our backyard that has a partial 3pt zone and a regulation rim that is permanently in the ground. Our backyard seems to have constant hoops going on. Because of his size, many coaches are going to discriminate against him. He needs to continue to improve his skills and maybe choose a league instead of a travel team. If he chooses league that don't compete, schedule wise, he can get in lots of basketball. Do NOT try to get him into a different sport-he loves hoops-but, he could participate in additional sports. Soccer is a great sport for basketball players; it keeps the conditioning of the legs and lungs going outside of the season. Also, running is a great and individual sport that is big in high schools and track teams in middle schools. If he can work to become a decent distance runner, by the time he's in 7th grade, he could be a force in competitive track.
Lots of basketball players are good sprinters because they have strong legs and they already know how to get short distances quickly. He needs to do multiple sports to stay fit and as we say in our house, it's cross training. You DO spend a fortune on shoes at that age because all the sports need shoes and kids feet keep growing rapidly(my experience anyway)until age 13-14. Got lemons? Make lemonade. In my house, when you give your all and fail in some way, it's still a huge success. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Give him a project of finding all the successful NBA players who were not exactly giants. Michael Jordan did not make his high school team until his 2nd or 3rd tryout. Interesting, huh?
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Old 10-12-2012, 12:18 PM   #58
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Athletics are so competitive now and I hate it. My son plays basketball in a couple leagues and he's happy as long as he's playing. He's very good. We have a court in our backyard that has a partial 3pt zone and a regulation rim that is permanently in the ground. Our backyard seems to have constant hoops going on. Because of his size, many coaches are going to discriminate against him. He needs to continue to improve his skills and maybe choose a league instead of a travel team. If he chooses league that don't compete, schedule wise, he can get in lots of basketball. Do NOT try to get him into a different sport-he loves hoops-but, he could participate in additional sports. Soccer is a great sport for basketball players; it keeps the conditioning of the legs and lungs going outside of the season. Also, running is a great and individual sport that is big in high schools and track teams in middle schools. If he can work to become a decent distance runner, by the time he's in 7th grade, he could be a force in competitive track.
Lots of basketball players are good sprinters because they have strong legs and they already know how to get short distances quickly. He needs to do multiple sports to stay fit and as we say in our house, it's cross training. You DO spend a fortune on shoes at that age because all the sports need shoes and kids feet keep growing rapidly(my experience anyway)until age 13-14. Got lemons? Make lemonade. In my house, when you give your all and fail in some way, it's still a huge success. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Give him a project of finding all the successful NBA players who were not exactly giants. Michael Jordan did not make his high school team until his 2nd or 3rd tryout. Interesting, huh?
Most people would be surprised at the number of pro baseball players that didn't play youth ball and if they did, they never made "all stars" or elite teams or played on travel teams.
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Old 10-12-2012, 12:32 PM   #59
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Athletics are so competitive now and I hate it. My son plays basketball in a couple leagues and he's happy as long as he's playing. He's very good. We have a court in our backyard that has a partial 3pt zone and a regulation rim that is permanently in the ground. Our backyard seems to have constant hoops going on. Because of his size, many coaches are going to discriminate against him. He needs to continue to improve his skills and maybe choose a league instead of a travel team. If he chooses league that don't compete, schedule wise, he can get in lots of basketball. Do NOT try to get him into a different sport-he loves hoops-but, he could participate in additional sports. Soccer is a great sport for basketball players; it keeps the conditioning of the legs and lungs going outside of the season. Also, running is a great and individual sport that is big in high schools and track teams in middle schools. If he can work to become a decent distance runner, by the time he's in 7th grade, he could be a force in competitive track.
Lots of basketball players are good sprinters because they have strong legs and they already know how to get short distances quickly. He needs to do multiple sports to stay fit and as we say in our house, it's cross training. You DO spend a fortune on shoes at that age because all the sports need shoes and kids feet keep growing rapidly(my experience anyway)until age 13-14. Got lemons? Make lemonade. In my house, when you give your all and fail in some way, it's still a huge success. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Give him a project of finding all the successful NBA players who were not exactly giants. Michael Jordan did not make his high school team until his 2nd or 3rd tryout. Interesting, huh?

You mean he didn't make varsity team his sophmore year.
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Old 10-12-2012, 12:41 PM   #60
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Same thing happened to my son for volleyball try outs. Most of his buddies got in, except him. He was so crushed. I felt so bad for him. But he got over it quick. All i can do is reassure him. Told him im proud of him for trying. He tried out for track & field and got in! So he's happy now. He's just not looking forward to running the 3.5 km!
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