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Old 10-08-2012, 05:24 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by luvmy3 View Post
I wouldn't call the parents. If it keeps happening, maybe, but not for just this one time.


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Originally Posted by FayeW View Post
He did nothing wrong and more importantly, he knew what the other kid was doing was wrong and tried to stop him. The fault lies with the parent who did nothing to stop his/her kid, not your son.
I agree- If I was to call ANYONE it would be the stupid parent who drove that let it happen!!
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Old 10-08-2012, 07:04 AM   #17
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There is no way I would be calling the other parents. I try not to get overly involved with my kids friends and their parents unless their is a health or safety issuse which there clearly is not in this situation. I don't go "tattle taling" for minor issuse.
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Old 10-08-2012, 08:50 AM   #18
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Originally Posted by SweetJoy View Post
The parent was the birthday girl's dad - not the boy who made the calls. But yeah, don't understand how or why he didn't notice or stop the shenanigans going on.



I'll have to check on that tomorrow.



We already gave it back to him, as soon as we realized he wasn't participating in the pranking.
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Originally Posted by goofyintoronto View Post
I understand that. I still think its ridiculous that a parent was in the car and did nothing. id have a few words with that parent. and i agree that your son did nothing wrong.

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I'm not defending the parent driver, but what did you expect him to do? Should he have pulled the car over and grabbed the phone out of the kids hand? Should he have done that as he was driving a van full of other people's kids?
If it were me, I would have told him to knock it off and give the phone back, but if it wasn't my kid there would be nothing I could do to make him do that. I would mention it to his parent when they picked him up or I dropped him off, and let them deal with him.

OP, did your ds say the driver told him to stop, or did he say he did absolutely nothing?
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Old 10-08-2012, 09:05 AM   #19
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I would call the parent, as noted in a "Just wanted you to know" type way. They're at an age where "boys will be boys" pranks can escalate easily and quickly into bullying, sexting, and other troublesome electronic behaviors. (No, I'm not saying that this behavior will always escalate, or that every boy who does this will become a bully or a serial killer. But these are things that parents need to keep an eye on.)

Prank calling is, to me, the minor issue. Grabbing someone else's property is more serious. You want to prank call from your own phone? Fine. You want to get someone else in trouble for it? Not so fine. And if the kid had broken the cell phone? Still no big deal?

Tell the parents. For all you know, this may not be the first problem. Since the kid is 11, the parents still have time to nip problems in the bud.
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Old 10-08-2012, 09:25 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by luvmy3

I'm not defending the parent driver, but what did you expect him to do? Should he have pulled the car over and grabbed the phone out of the kids hand? Should he have done that as he was driving a van full of other people's kids?
If it were me, I would have told him to knock it off and give the phone back, but if it wasn't my kid there would be nothing I could do to make him do that. I would mention it to his parent when they picked him up or I dropped him off, and let them deal with him.

OP, did your ds say the driver told him to stop, or did he say he did absolutely nothing?
Simple, tell the kid to knock it off! how hard is that? I don't care if it was my son or his friends. I would tell him to stop. If he doesnt listen I would be more firm with my second warning. and yes, pull over if needed. I wouldn't just sit there and let the nonsense continue!

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Old 10-08-2012, 09:29 AM   #21
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Originally Posted by snykymom

Prank calling is, to me, the minor issue. Grabbing someone else's property is more serious. You want to prank call from your own phone? Fine. You want to get someone else in trouble for it? Not so fine. And if the kid had broken the cell phone? Still no big deal?

Tell the parents. For all you know, this may not be the first problem. Since the kid is 11, the parents still have time to nip problems in the bud.
yes totally agree! This kid needs a lesson in manners.

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Old 10-08-2012, 09:30 AM   #22
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Originally Posted by luvmy3 View Post
I'm not defending the parent driver, but what did you expect him to do? Should he have pulled the car over and grabbed the phone out of the kids hand? Should he have done that as he was driving a van full of other people's kids?
If it were me, I would have told him to knock it off and give the phone back, but if it wasn't my kid there would be nothing I could do to make him do that. I would mention it to his parent when they picked him up or I dropped him off, and let them deal with him.

OP, did your ds say the driver told him to stop, or did he say he did absolutely nothing?


I asked my son and he said that the driver didn't say anything. He also said that he was telling his friend 'give it back' loud enough that the parent could intervene on his behalf, because at this point that's what my son wanted.

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Originally Posted by snykymom View Post
I would call the parent, as noted in a "Just wanted you to know" type way. They're at an age where "boys will be boys" pranks can escalate easily and quickly into bullying, sexting, and other troublesome electronic behaviors. (No, I'm not saying that this behavior will always escalate, or that every boy who does this will become a bully or a serial killer. But these are things that parents need to keep an eye on.)

Prank calling is, to me, the minor issue. Grabbing someone else's property is more serious. You want to prank call from your own phone? Fine. You want to get someone else in trouble for it? Not so fine. And if the kid had broken the cell phone? Still no big deal?

Tell the parents. For all you know, this may not be the first problem. Since the kid is 11, the parents still have time to nip problems in the bud.
This is what my husband's problem with the situation is, right there. The fact that the boy grabbed the phone and wouldn't give it back - plus the fact that one of the persons pranked happened to call the phone back. When I asked DS what the person said, he didn't know, because he still didn't have the phone back yet.
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Old 10-08-2012, 09:38 AM   #23
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I guess I'm in the minority here. I would not be calling the kids parents or the adult driver. Kids think prank calling at that age is funny. Definately not something to get worked up over. Yeah, the kid should have given the phone back when asked. It's a great lesson that you've taught your child to be more assertive with his property, but it's not your job to tell the other parents what lessons you think they should be teaching their child. Nor do I think it's your job to reprimand the driver for in retrospect not acting like you would have in that situation.

No one's safety was at risk. If some kids parents called me to reprimand me for such a minor situation, I'd think they were an overprotective loon and I'd be steering my kid away from any future interaction with their child.
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Old 10-08-2012, 10:24 AM   #24
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I guess I'm in the minority here. I would not be calling the kids parents or the adult driver. Kids think prank calling at that age is funny. Definately not something to get worked up over. Yeah, the kid should have given the phone back when asked. It's a great lesson that you've taught your child to be more assertive with his property, but it's not your job to tell the other parents what lessons you think they should be teaching their child. Nor do I think it's your job to reprimand the driver for in retrospect not acting like you would have in that situation.

No one's safety was at risk. If some kids parents called me to reprimand me for such a minor situation, I'd think they were an overprotective loon and I'd be steering my kid away from any future interaction with their child.
Thank You that is what I said also.

I really don't get the way over the top reaction to a few prank calls!

And OP did your son say Hey Mr Z, Billy took my phone, please tell him to give it back? When I'm driving kids I would ignore them just saying to each other "hey give me my phone" I don't interfere with kids until I"m asked, they need to work things out among themselves at that age.
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Old 10-08-2012, 11:35 AM   #25
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Originally Posted by teacup princess View Post
I guess I'm in the minority here. I would not be calling the kids parents or the adult driver. Kids think prank calling at that age is funny. Definately not something to get worked up over. Yeah, the kid should have given the phone back when asked. It's a great lesson that you've taught your child to be more assertive with his property, but it's not your job to tell the other parents what lessons you think they should be teaching their child. Nor do I think it's your job to reprimand the driver for in retrospect not acting like you would have in that situation.

No one's safety was at risk. If some kids parents called me to reprimand me for such a minor situation, I'd think they were an overprotective loon and I'd be steering my kid away from any future interaction with their child.
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Old 10-08-2012, 11:43 AM   #26
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I'd let it go this time, unless it keeps up. Good thing in my days of prank calling, there was no *69 or caller ID.
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Old 10-08-2012, 11:51 AM   #27
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what the hell? what is wrong with that parent? I would not allow that to happen. How he or she can sit there and say nothing is beyond me. I wonder what else this kid gets away with at home!? in this case, you bet I would call the parent and ask why he or she allowed this to happen with your sons phone, why didn't he/she step in. ridiculous!

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This-this is the parent I would call. Ask them about the incident. Tell them the pranked people called back on your son's phone and HE is in trouble. Ask the parent what he or she thought was going on. They, the parent driving, are idiots. Any parent not calling for good behavior from 11yo children should not be allowed to supervise your child again.
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Old 10-08-2012, 12:04 PM   #28
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Thank You that is what I said also.

I really don't get the way over the top reaction to a few prank calls!

And OP did your son say Hey Mr Z, Billy took my phone, please tell him to give it back? When I'm driving kids I would ignore them just saying to each other "hey give me my phone" I don't interfere with kids until I"m asked, they need to work things out among themselves at that age.
A cell phone is an expensive item and as an adult, you should step in. It's not like it's a mechanical pencil or knit cap. As an adult, you just say, 'cut the crap boys, give the phone back now.' Then instruct the owner to put the phone away and not get it out again, firmly. 11 yo boys need guidance and boundaries. They take lack of supervision as permission to have bad behavior.
As someone who has had charge of as many as 65 kids at one time, over and over, they respond best to rules. In the end, they actually like knowing bullying will not be tolerated. Would you just throw them in a pen and let them fight it out? Sounds like it.
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Old 10-08-2012, 12:07 PM   #29
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I'm not defending the parent driver, but what did you expect him to do? Should he have pulled the car over and grabbed the phone out of the kids hand? Yes . Should he have done that as he was driving a van full of other people's kids? No, he should have, as you said, pulled the car over and taken the phone from his son and taken control of the situation. If it were me, I would have told him to knock it off and give the phone back, but if it wasn't my kid there would be nothing I could do to make him do that. Sure you could. You could stop the car and embarrass the heck out of the kid. I would mention it to his parent when they picked him up or I dropped him off, and let them deal with him.

OP, did your ds say the driver told him to stop, or did he say he did absolutely nothing?
It doesn't matter whether it's his kid or not. He is the adult in charge of the children.

Any child that i was ever responsible for was made it understand that I was in charge and therefore I make the rules while they are with me.

But I wouldn't be calling the other kid's parents. In the grand scheme of things a couple of prank phone calls is no biggie. I'd also be thinking twice about letting my kid go with this parent who can't seem to control some 11 year old boys in a car.
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Old 10-08-2012, 12:14 PM   #30
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A cell phone is an expensive item and as an adult, you should step in. It's not like it's a mechanical pencil or knit cap. As an adult, you just say, 'cut the crap boys, give the phone back now.' Then instruct the owner to put the phone away and not get it out again, firmly. 11 yo boys need guidance and boundaries. They take lack of supervision as permission to have bad behavior.
As someone who has had charge of as many as 65 kids at one time, over and over, they respond best to rules. In the end, they actually like knowing bullying will not be tolerated. Would you just throw them in a pen and let them fight it out? Sounds like it.
I'm not listening to everything they say!!! for heavens sake they were probably in the back and who listens to all their yacking?

Seriously you listen intently to all the conversation going on in your car when you take kids? I can guarantee you won't be the preferred mode of transportation as they get older.

Again I ask if the OP's son asked the parent to intervene? I'm not butting into 2 boys squabbling over something, sorry.

And I don't need a lecture on supervising kids. a school group etc is a lot different than a few boys in my car.
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