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Old 09-18-2012, 06:59 PM   #16
DawnM
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I would sit down and figure out what she needs. If she can take along any food she will need from home, food money would be a min.

I would think that you could come up with a good number. If she lives at home do you cover all food, toiletries, gas, etc....????? If so, she shouldn't need much.

We don't want our son (oldest) to work when he gets to college either. He has some LDs too and we would rather he focus on school. But we will see.

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Old 09-18-2012, 07:42 PM   #17
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Originally Posted by DawnM View Post

We don't want our son (oldest) to work when he gets to college either. He has some LDs too and we would rather he focus on school. But we will see.

Dawn
It is all a lot to figure out with you are dealing with LDs You want them independent, but you also want them to succeed.

It is possible she may be coaching a middle school girls basketball team, but they will pay her at the end, and it won't be a lot. But she is studying special education and wants to work with middle school kids and she also wants to coach so if she gets this we felt it would contribute to her goals for her future.

But if she doesn't get this job, I think I would rather her wait until summer to get a job.

For us, the hardest part is dealing with the 'twin' issue. Wanting to be fair to both and not give one more than the other....but frustrated because the one without the LD has a job and can be independent (although she works at American Eagle and it seems like she is working for clothes and spends more at work than she makes), but giving to one rather than other wouldn't be good and cause issue.

The complexities of twins has been an ongoing issue for us over all these years.....this is just one more of those issues I guess. haha
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Old 09-18-2012, 07:45 PM   #18
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I went to school out of state and my parents gave me much more. But it was to also cover other expenses. I want to say I got a few hundred a month. It's been a while.

ETA: My parents didn't pay my tuition, they did agree to pay my living expenses while I was in school though.
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Old 09-18-2012, 07:46 PM   #19
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I might sound mean to you, but I don't give my college kids ANY spending money, and they have to work in the summer to contribute to their expenses. The oldest lives with his girlfriend, so while I will pay his tuition, I offer NO MONEY towards his rent. The second has a big scholarship and some grants, plus I work at her university and get a very big discount, so we split the bill ( she really doesn't have to pay much). I found that when I was paying for everything they did not think so much about what they were doing, the oldest didn't get great grades. When THEIR time and money were on the table, doing the best they could became much more important to them.

My kids are bright and talented and have had no problem finding summer work.

I agree that working during the school year is tricky and that each student has to weigh the course load, outside activities, etc when considering whether working during the school year is a good idea or not. Grades come first, and if they can't maintain high grades while working they should focus strictly on school. On the other hand, there is absolutely no reason why a student who is not paying for any of their school could not work during the summer and save that money for spending money.
I don't think it's mean and we do the same for our DD, but OP specifically stated that there are learning issues involved. I think in that case, it would be setting a child up to fail if you expect her to work. She already has to put in more time to achieve the same results. I am all for working in the summer, but not during the school year and I would provide monetary support for that.
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Old 09-18-2012, 08:07 PM   #20
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I worked retail full time during summers and winter break (1 month), and that made me enough to easily cover my spending money. My parents contributed towards tuition and room and board, but not spending, and I didn't have to work during school except for my 15 hours a week of work study that was part of my financial aid package.
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Old 09-18-2012, 08:47 PM   #21
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Oh, it isn't just twins. I have two sons who are 20 months apart. They will be in college at the same time, so I have to figure out equality too. It is an issue NOW in some ways. My 7th grader can simply do more academically than my 9th grader. 7th grader already feels I require more of him. Sigh.

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It is all a lot to figure out with you are dealing with LDs You want them independent, but you also want them to succeed.

It is possible she may be coaching a middle school girls basketball team, but they will pay her at the end, and it won't be a lot. But she is studying special education and wants to work with middle school kids and she also wants to coach so if she gets this we felt it would contribute to her goals for her future.

But if she doesn't get this job, I think I would rather her wait until summer to get a job.

For us, the hardest part is dealing with the 'twin' issue. Wanting to be fair to both and not give one more than the other....but frustrated because the one without the LD has a job and can be independent (although she works at American Eagle and it seems like she is working for clothes and spends more at work than she makes), but giving to one rather than other wouldn't be good and cause issue.

The complexities of twins has been an ongoing issue for us over all these years.....this is just one more of those issues I guess. haha
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Old 09-18-2012, 08:52 PM   #22
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My twins just graduated college. They worked full time summers and made their money last all year. They commuted and paid for their gas money out of summer earnings. They learned to be very frugal with their money!
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Old 09-18-2012, 09:01 PM   #23
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I give my child $100 for spending, haircut and laundry money. He's there to study, not to have fun.
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Old 09-18-2012, 09:08 PM   #24
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I have a college freshman, and we give her no spending money. We paid her tuition, dorm and meal plan -- the small stuff is her responsibility.

I'm actually surprised that she isn't really going off-campus to eat, etc. She has the smallest meal plan a freshman's allowed, and she's already calculated that she's going to have a hard time spending all her food money. Students get into football games for free. They have two movie theaters on campus, which are $1. She isn't old enough to get into the bars, and now that she's becoming a health-nut, I suspect she'll never become a drinker. She and her roommate neither one have a car on campus, but they ride the free bus up to the grocery store or the shops. Her tuition includes book rental, which is a wonderful thing. She's still using her high school back pack and calculator. Long story short: I've quizzed her a couple of times about whether her money is sufficient, and she is spending much less than I anticipated.

She was outraged that she had to spend $18 on a pair of goggles for her Chemistry class. She bought a few things for her dorm room. That's about it for spending.

For your situation, it's too late this year, but I'd suggest having your daughter work during the summer and save her money for the school year. Say she works full time for 12 weeks during the summer and saves $200 each week (that'd leave her some summer spending money too); that'd give her roughly $80/week during the school year -- more than enough for small treats like meals out, movie tickets, an occasional item of clothing.

I don't think working during the school year is too much for a college student -- even one who has to spend a more than average amount of time studying. This is especially true if she can get a job on campus; those jobs tend to be very flexible with time.
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Old 09-18-2012, 09:21 PM   #25
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Originally Posted by MrsPete View Post
I have a college freshman, and we give her no spending money. We paid her tuition, dorm and meal plan -- the small stuff is her responsibility.

I'm actually surprised that she isn't really going off-campus to eat, etc. She has the smallest meal plan a freshman's allowed, and she's already calculated that she's going to have a hard time spending all her food money. Students get into football games for free. They have two movie theaters on campus, which are $1. She isn't old enough to get into the bars, and now that she's becoming a health-nut, I suspect she'll never become a drinker. She and her roommate neither one have a car on campus, but they ride the free bus up to the grocery store or the shops. Long story short: I've quizzed her a couple of times about whether her money is sufficient, and she is spending much less than I anticipated.

For your situation, it's too late this year, but I'd suggest having your daughter work during the summer and save her money for the school year. Say she works 12 weeks during the summer and saves $200 each week (that'd leave her some summer spending money too); that'd give her roughly $80/week during the school year -- more than enough for small treats like meals out, movie tickets, an occasional item of clothing.

I don't think working during the school year is too much for a college student -- even one who has to spend a more than average amount of time studying. This is especially true if she can get a job on campus; those jobs tend to be very flexible with time.
That all depends on who the student is and the courseload/major. And at my school, most jobs on campus are only work study jobs. Yes SOME college students can work and maintain greta grades at school just like SOME can't. There's no one size fits all situation for college students

If I worked during the school year, there is no way I'd ever have a chance at getting into the post-bac programs I am looking at. It just wouldn't work in my situation. Plus...I already have a part-time job...10 hours a week of driving and doctors appointments...I just don't get paid for it...

By not working during the shcool year and working my butt off in school, I will be eligible for scholarships and grants for post bac and research grants for those programs as well for pre-med.

I hate it when people make broad statements that college students should be working while in school. It just isn't so simple
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Old 09-18-2012, 09:28 PM   #26
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Actually, I didn't mention before, but my oldest does have learning disabilities. (executive processing disorder, add, visual processing disorder).It doesn't mean that he can't work in the summer for spending money for the year, in fact, I believe it is more important for him to work because he needed to learn what was expected before he started doing internships or getting career related jobs. While schools will work with learning disabilities, jobs aren't so accommodating.

I guess I should add that my parents paid for my room/board and I paid all my own tuition and spending money. Some years I worked, some years I got scholarship money. Seemed a good model to me.
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Old 09-18-2012, 09:51 PM   #27
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That all depends on who the student is and the courseload/major. And at my school, most jobs on campus are only work study jobs. Yes SOME college students can work and maintain greta grades at school just like SOME can't. There's no one size fits all situation for college students

If I worked during the school year, there is no way I'd ever have a chance at getting into the post-bac programs I am looking at. It just wouldn't work in my situation. Plus...I already have a part-time job...10 hours a week of driving and doctors appointments...I just don't get paid for it...

By not working during the shcool year and working my butt off in school, I will be eligible for scholarships and grants for post bac and research grants for those programs as well for pre-med.

I hate it when people make broad statements that college students should be working while in school. It just isn't so simple
And yet when I was a student in the 80s, I'd estimate 70% of my college friends had jobs of some sort during the school year -- and they made it work because they had to do so. Some had classes only MWF and worked on TuTh, while others worked 3rd shift or weekends, and others worked intensely during holiday breaks. Pretty close to 100% worked during the summer. You say that it just wouldn't work for you, but IF YOU NEEDED to work, you'd figure it out one way or the other, no matter what your major or special needs. You'd sleep less, socialize less, become more efficient in your study time -- but you'd make it.

Today, judging from what my college daughter says, I think fewer than half her college friends work during the school year -- and quite a few didn't even work during the summer. It's easy to say, "I can't because of this or that", but challenging majors, medical needs, and a need to keep grades up for scholarships, etc. aren't new concerns -- every generation has faced those same issues; learning to deal with them is part of becoming an independent adult. I think the difference is that it's become more acceptable to borrow these days, and many people use that as their first option rather than working. Also, I think that today's young people have lost some creativity and resourcefulness that previous generations had -- I think much of it has been replaced by the use of technology, which is useful in a completely different way.

I don't think anyone said that college students "should be working", but IF it's a need, a college student should be capable of making it happen at least in some small way.
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Old 09-18-2012, 09:53 PM   #28
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I keep seeing people mention working in the summers because students won't be in class, do other states not have mandatory summer classes? My school mandated a certain number of summer courses and they were a lot harder than my regular school year classes. I think I was busier in the summer than regular semesters often. Also some majors run year round, but I'm sure that varies by program.

Oh and my best college job was being an RA. Paid room and board and a little extra for really not that much work.
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Old 09-18-2012, 10:06 PM   #29
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OP,

You do what YOU need to do for your daughter and what you can do. I wouldn't rely on a message board to answer this for me.


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Old 09-18-2012, 11:02 PM   #30
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OP just want to say I think it's great you're being flexible and open to making adjustments to what was planned!

For determining the amount, I think you and your dd could take a look at a typical week and what the amount is expected to cover. Are there free/low-cost events on campus or does she go to local restaurants, movies, etc.?

$10 seems low to me...I would say at least $20. That would cover a movie/ice cream with friends, maybe a coffee during the week on campus, etc. I would take a look at typical activities and what they cost.

Good luck!
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