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Old 07-31-2012, 02:48 PM   #1
Captain_Oblivious
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Operation Big Thunder: the Dole Whip Conspiracy COMPLETE

TOP SECRET—EYES ONLY

Welcome to the mission briefing concerning Operation Big Thunder, a secret mission that took place in July 2012 and only now is being declassified from the highest levels. If you are reading this, you have been cleared to receive sensitive information. Please do not allow these mission logs to fall into enemy hands, as it may compromise our agents in the field.

Assignment: Our mission, should we choose to accept it, was to surprise our 3 children with a trip to Walt Disney World. This would have been a much easier task in the days when they couldn’t read road signs or maps, and hadn’t yet broken our parent-speak code of spelling out words we didn’t want them to hear in conversation. Without having the intelligence or resources to create a new code, this would clearly be a difficult assignment.



Mission Personnel:
  1. Mark, aka “Dad”, aka “Captain Oblivious”. 5’11”, too many lbs., brown hair (thinning), blue eyes, age 37 (right, honey?). Occupation: civil engineer in the state of Delaware. Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks), golf, Philadelphia sports, movies, reading. Special skills: TBD.

  2. Julie, aka “Mom”, aka “Mrs. Knowitall”, aka “Muddy Mae Suggins”. 5’8”, just the right number of lbs., brown hair (luxurious), brown eyes, age undisclosed. Occupation: teacher. Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks), photography, arts & crafts, reading. Special skills: creator of Key Lime Pie of Awesomeness.

  3. Sarah, aka “Sarahbug”. 4’6”, brown hair, blue eyes, age 10. Occupation: 5th grade student. Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks), Lego, Harry Potter, tennis, cute cuddly animals. Special skills: Arts & crafts, and pointing out differences between the Harry Potter movies and books.

  4. David, aka “Big Dave”. 4’2”, blond hair, blue eyes, age 8. Occupation: 3rd grade student. Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks), baseball, Lego, Philadelphia Phillies baseball, baseball, sports, and baseball. Special skills: Photographic memory and making annoying noises in back seat of van.

  5. Scott, aka “Scotty”, aka “Baron Heinrich von Frankenschnitzel”. 3’11”, brown hair, brown eyes, age 6. Occupation: 1st grade student. Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks), Philadelphia Eagles football, Star Wars, cute cuddly animals, The Avengers. Special skills: Performance artist.

Cover Story:

In summer 2011, our friends asked us if we would be interested in renting a beach house for a week with them at Pawleys Island, South Carolina (just south of Myrtle Beach) during the summer of 2012. We would split the rent among 3 families and spend a week hanging out at the beach with our buddies. We thought it sounded like fun, and agreed. More importantly, it gave us an excellent cover story for our mission. Julie and I have a long-term mission to get our kids to all 50 states, and the only state left on the East Coast that our kids hadn’t seen was Georgia. If we’re going to be in South Carolina, we reasoned, it wouldn’t be that much further to drive into Georgia. And if we’re going to be in Georgia, it’s not that much further to drive into Florida. And if we’re going to be in Florida…you can do the math.

The plan was to tell the kids we were doing a “secret vacation”. Then we would drive down to Pawleys Island and—surprise! Their friends would be at the house too. We would pass this off as the reason for the secrecy. Then, when the week was over, we would simply turn south instead of north. Our goal was to get all the way to the Disney World gates without the purpose of the trip being detected.

Supplies:

Transport Vehicle: 2006 Honda Odyssey. Special non-standard modifications include ejector seats, surface-to-surface missiles, turbo boost, and espresso machine.

Electronics: Amazon Kindle reading device, iPods, DVD player, Nintendo DS’s. All to be used for the purpose of distracting kids during long drives. TomTom GPS unit, with pre-loaded Homer Simpson and Darth Vader celebrity voices, used for navigation.

Necessities: 3 bags of Pop chips, mini-Oreos, mini-Nutter Butters, 2 12-packs of Coke, map to nearest donut shop.

Secondary Mission:

2 years ago, I did a trip report that included a “find the movie/TV quote” game as well as a Beverly slogan contest that were both a lot of fun (your enjoyment may have varied). So, to add a little fun to this report, I will continue to award points* to anyone spotting movie quotes in the text of the report (please note that there probably won’t be nearly as many as the last time). Also, in order to protect sensitive information from falling into enemy hands, I will from time to time completely fabricate a detail of the trip report (I have occasionally been accused of doing this in the past). I will generally add one false statement per chapter. So, you can also play the “Spot the Lie” game and try to guess which part of this story is completely made up, and I’ll highlight it in red once it has been found. Some will be obvious, some not so much. The total Movie Quote points and Spot the Lie points will be added to produce a winner who will receive…well, probably nothing of value other than a cheesy title. But if you’re looking for something valuable, why are you reading this report in the first place?

Thanks for reading along, and I hope you’ll continue along as we recount the mission.

Last edited by Captain_Oblivious; 04-11-2013 at 12:45 PM.
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Old 07-31-2012, 02:48 PM   #2
Captain_Oblivious
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TABLE OF CONTENTS

Mission Briefing

Pawleys Island and Charleston:
Mission Log #1: Checkpoint Pedro
Mission Log #2: Checkpoint Pawley
Mission Log #3: Checkpoint Pawley
Mission Log #4: Checkpoint Pawley
Mission Log #5: Checkpoint Patriot
Mission Log #6: Checkpoint Sumter
Mission Log #7: Checkpoint Charleston
Mission Log#8: Checkpoint Pawley

Arrival Day:
OPERATION BIG THUNDER
Mission Log #10: Checkpoint Kidani

Epcot Day:
Mission Log #11: Checkpoint Epcot
Mission Log #12: Checkpoint Philadelphia...and Munich...and Beijing
Mission Log #13: Checkpoint Cozumel, Philly...Look, we're still in Epcot, ok?
Mission Log #14: Checkpoint Naples

Typhoon Lagoon Day:
Mission Log #15: Checkpoint Tango Lima
Mission Log #16: Checkpoint Tango Lima, Part Deux
Mission Log #17: Checkpoint Kona (Kilo Charlie)

Hollywood Studios/Magic Kingdom Day
Mission Log #18: Checkpoint Tatooine
Mission Log #19: Checkpoint Mike Kilo
Mission Log #20: Checkpoint Big Thunder
Mission Log #21: Checkpoint Castle

Heading Home
Mission Log #22: Checking Out
Mission Log #23: Checkpoint St. Augustine

Wrap-Up and Preview of the Next Mission
To Infinity And Beyond!

Last edited by Captain_Oblivious; 12-18-2012 at 03:21 PM.
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Old 07-31-2012, 02:59 PM   #3
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Am I first?

Great intros! I can't believe how the boys have grown since I met them last year.

I know this will be a fun report...yours always are. I'll probably skip the games (too much going on with medical issues with family that I'm not always quick to read updates and I doubt you'll have much done before I leave in 46 days).
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Old 07-31-2012, 03:01 PM   #4
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I'm in....


Tell me the "map to the nearest donut shop" was a lie!

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Old 07-31-2012, 03:03 PM   #5
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Ohhhhh the fiorst page
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Old 07-31-2012, 03:10 PM   #6
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Joining in! Great introduction!
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Old 07-31-2012, 03:11 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
TOP SECRET—EYES ONLY
As opposed to sniffing the trip report?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
Mission Personnel:
  1. Mark, Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks)
  2. Julie, Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks)
  3. Sarah, Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks)
  4. David, Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks)
  5. Scott, Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks)
I'm not a mathematician. How many do we need to have a pattern?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
And if we’re going to be in Florida…you can do the math.
Didn't you read my last comment? I may have to unsubscribe if these shenanigans keep up.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
The plan was to tell the kids we were doing a “secret vacation”.
Could have used a "Double Secret" vacation as well.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
Transport Vehicle: 2006 Honda Odyssey. Special non-standard modifications include ejector seats, surface-to-surface missiles, turbo boost, and espresso machine.
Q has set you up right. How does it handle at mach speeds? Mine pulls a little to the right. But that could also be my co-pilot digging her fingernails into my right arm in terror.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
I will generally add one false statement per chapter. So, you can also play the “Spot the Lie” game and try to guess which part of this story is completely made up, and I’ll highlight it in red once it has been found.
I'd say the one in this chapter was your age, but then again, who really knows what that is.
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Old 07-31-2012, 03:12 PM   #9
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Present and why doesn't the app allow you to click through?
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Old 07-31-2012, 03:12 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
Reserved
Lie.
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Old 07-31-2012, 03:14 PM   #11
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Quote:
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I'd say the one in this chapter was your age, but then again, who really knows what that is.
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Old 07-31-2012, 03:19 PM   #12
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Old 07-31-2012, 03:53 PM   #13
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Yep…
I am crawling up the walls board, so I’ll sign on to this one.




Oh who am I kidding…
I’ve been looking forward to his one since before y’all even left Delaware.

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Old 07-31-2012, 03:54 PM   #14
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Yeaaah, another TR for CP!!

Thank you for the heads up!!

I'll come back to read, need to hit my workout.
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Old 07-31-2012, 03:56 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
This would have been a much easier task in the days when they couldn’t read road signs or maps, and hadn’t yet broken our parent-speak code of spelling out words we didn’t want them to hear in conversation.
Curse their above average intelligence!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
Without having the intelligence or resources to create a new code......
Curse our average intelligence!


Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
[*]Julie, aka “Mom”, aka “Mrs. Knowitall”, aka “Muddy Mae Suggins”. 5’8”, just the right number of lbs., brown hair (luxurious), brown eyes, age undisclosed. Occupation: teacher. Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks), photography, arts & crafts, reading. Special skills: creator of Key Lime Pie of Awesomeness.
Yeah, first time back in the classroom in 10 years....my posts and insight might not be as many as before.....


Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
[*]Scott, aka “Scotty”, aka “Baron Heinrich von Frankenschnitzel”. 3’11”, brown hair, brown eyes, age 6. Occupation: 1st grade student. Interests: Travel (esp. Disney parks), Philadelphia Eagles football, Star Wars, cute cuddly animals, The Avengers. Special skills: Performance artist.[/LIST]
Remember that height....it will come back to haunt poor Heinrich later....


Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
Transport Vehicle: 2006 Honda Odyssey. Special non-standard modifications include ejector seats, surface-to-surface missiles, turbo boost, and espresso machine.
DUDE! Where have you been hiding the espresso machine?!


Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
Electronics: Amazon Kindle reading device
Good job remembering it this time, honey.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Oblivious View Post
Also, in order to protect sensitive information from falling into enemy hands, I will from time to time completely fabricate a detail of the trip report (I have occasionally been accused of doing this in the past). I will generally add one false statement per chapter. So, you can also play the “Spot the Lie” game and try to guess which part of this story is completely made up, and I’ll highlight it in red once it has been found.
Much as I love your little reindeer games, I think I'm going to exclude myself from this contest.....seeing as how I was there and know how it REALLY played out.


Quote:
Originally Posted by KatMark View Post
I doubt you'll have much done before I leave in 46 days.
She gotcha, hon!! (Good one, Kathy!)



Quote:
Originally Posted by FreezinRafiki View Post
I'm not a mathematician. How many do we need to have a pattern?

I'd say the one in this chapter was your age, but then again, who really knows what that is.
Yeah, apparently you're not the only non-mathematician of the bunch.....
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