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Old 10-27-2012, 12:04 AM   #256
kaoden39
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Avast ye matey!!

I love the stippling for the beard. It really does make a difference. They were cute dueling in the room.


I think that although I look forward to seeing the parks with the Halloween decorations I don't think I would enjoy the party either.
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Old 10-27-2012, 10:18 AM   #257
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We are up far too early for anything but a flight to Disney, because we're doing a little 5K at my alma mater as part of their Homecoming/Alumni weekend. We spent yesterday with MIL and therefore I missed all the other things I wanted to do for the weekend, but oh well.

Now I can stop the agita and hand-wringing, because Robert talked to his mom and she wants to cancel her cruise. She said if she has just one more flight in her, she wants it to be to/from Korea, so we'll just toss her cruise money towards that in the Spring. So now I don't have to *worry* about it anymore, the idea of if it happened on the cruise, if she forgot where she was, etc etc etc. Decision made.



The fight in the room was a re-do, LOL. They'd been doing it naturally and I was taking pictures, but I had my camera on "night" mode which made it all blurry. So I made them do it again.

And I love the stippling.
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Old 10-27-2012, 10:48 AM   #258
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Scotty loves doing things like 5ks. He did a duathlon last weekend, it was his first one and he loved it!


I think that maybe a trip to Korea is much better for MIL. The cruise would have scared me with her health.


How funny that you re-staged the fight! It looks like they had just as much fun with the re-stage as they probably did with the original duel.
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Old 10-28-2012, 02:35 AM   #259
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I was scared, too. But I was just as scared of *telling* her that we didn't feel comfy with her going.

Gathered the clan today and got a LOT of talking done. She has had some pretty drastic personality changes. Suggesting that people get dogs. Saying she misses having a dog. Feeding dogs people-food. NOT liking me. Deciding she DOES like my BIL's new-ish partner. (though whether or not she gets that that is their relationship I'm not sure, since she had forgotten one of the dogs that lives there) etc etc

I think it's good that we're all talking. And she now has several people at her senior housing place checking up on her AND calling us. So that's good.
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Old 10-28-2012, 10:05 AM   #260
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Thankfully you are relieved from having to be the "bad" guy on the trip.


This could be an interesting situation with your MIL and her spotty memory and the changes. I hope she remembers that she likes you, that can be really hurtful. I know that from personal experience.


Good, it's good to know her neighbors care and are helpful. That will help until you guys can get her into AL.
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Old 10-28-2012, 11:02 PM   #261
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Sadly, the problem with AL is that it's not actually what she needs. Or, rather, what she NEEDS would cost even more. Because what she needs is someone making sure she takes her pills* and eats. Which means someone visiting at least twice a day. And AL or no AL, that costs some money. Money that isn't out there.

Now we've hit the roadblock that she is resisting giving us her financial info, which we need to make any decisions based on actual knowledge. I found out that the day (the HOUR, no, the half hour) she chose to throw papers at me, papers like bank statements, etc, because she was misunderstanding what I was saying about her supplemental insurance**, she then told BIL's friend that she didn't trust me, that I wanted to know ALL about her money, and why was I doing that.

Short term memory loss. Long term, too. Not her fault. Nothing to do with ME.

Still hurts, though.

And drives me mad that she has absolutely no logic, no memory of things, won't listen, and yet she gets to decide that she won't go to AL and won't make the money available for someone more proper to check on her.

Impossible.



*if she doesn't want to treat all of this, she could say so. she's an adult. she can make her decisions. the trouble comes in when she SAYS she'll treat it, but then either doesn't remember to take her pills, or is choosing to not take them. ***

**if you are going to use AARP supplemental insurance, you have to keep your AARP membership, and not cancel it because they are "always" taking money out of your account, which means ONE charge of $16 per YEAR, along with the premiums. (and that was a decision made two years ago, before these strokes happened...)

***due to the number of times she has stated that she wants to die, is ready to "go", etc etc, in front of her grandchildren, they barely pay attention to her now. They are all pre-mourning her, and it's almost like she's not in the room for them now, because they feel that she is just about to die. It's SO sad, but it's because of how much she talks in front of them. I tried to get some stuff not talked about last night in front of the kids, and they all said "it's OK, grandma talks about that already". Sigh.
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Last edited by bumbershoot; 10-28-2012 at 11:18 PM.
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Old 10-28-2012, 11:10 PM   #262
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Molly, I think it is time to step aside and let her kids handle it. Obviously she is going to resist the help from you. Since when is she buddy enough with your BILs friend to talk to him about you? I thought they didn't get along.
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Old 10-28-2012, 11:32 PM   #263
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I'm not talking to her at all from here forth about where she should live, who should take care of her, etc. I am going to let Robert talk about finances with her. Since I"m still the one here and available, I'll continue to take her to appointments.

BIL's friend (well, ex, and mysteriously a housemate once he reappeared after a few years...and the cause of strife with BIL's boyfriend) has always had a weird relationship with her. It's like me in the last couple years, where my presence wore her down and she would talk to me, but he had a LOT more time to do this. And since he's back and works nearby, they talk. And he has always been the biggest, WORST, gossip with her, especially about me. His words made me cry last night because he said "oh, she HATES you now". I held it together until he left the room, then talked quickly with BIL and boyfriend, who assured me I needed to pay attention to the source of that "info", and he exaggerates everything especially when it comes to the negative things she says.

In the meantime, he calls her the "dragon", and really despises her, even while encouraging her to dislike other people. He's a mystery. A mystery I wish would get his own life and leave this family's.
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Old 10-28-2012, 11:53 PM   #264
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October 7th.


Got in late and got up early! Receipts are inconvenient, so just some pictures. We were quickly finishing up the trivia challenges offered by the resort.





A fluffy lion.









Today Eamon chose to not check back in regularly with us on Tom Sawyer's. This was a pretty big problem. He knows that my claustrophobia and Robert's smaller-but-still-big size cause us to have a very hard time following him into the caverns. In July he checked in every few minutes, and I had no expectation that he would just disappear. So imagine half an hour with no checkins, with your mind slowly starting to work itself into all the things a mind can think of with children. Everything you can imagine I imagined, I imagined.

When we finally spotted him, he darted off again. Oh gracious that was BAD. Once he was corralled, we left the island immediately, and had a LONG talk with him. We aren't the kinds to punish while at Disney, because that sucks for us, so we made an extra-long punishment for once we got home, that he's still working on. Nearly got it extended today, too, with attitude.

So anyway, that's the only picture taken on the island.


This was the day we tried the Fried Green Tomato Sandwich. And the verdict is "mmmmgood!" LOVED it.




No surprise that this was E's meal.




Underside of Tarzan's bridge.











Sigh, Indy...




Took some time (and quarters) to play Indiana Jones pinball in the same-themed giftshop. It was a GREAT game!











Walking on by.



Hopped over to DCA for various things (animation academy of course) and beverages at Fiddler etc. Love the Starbucks/Mickey confetti cups.




The lockers behind Grizzly are very clear as to how long you get for the free rental!




That late afternoon E and I went to the PPH arcade, where he flew a plane.




ha!

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Old 10-28-2012, 11:55 PM   #265
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He has got to go. Who knows what he is saying to her? Let Robert deal with her. What about SIL? Why isn't she helping more with her mother? I'm sorry if I am being nosy. I just know that if it was my mom no matter how busy I might be I would be deep in it working this out.
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Old 10-29-2012, 12:03 AM   #266
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Poor Molly. Kids just don't understand it, we worry. It's a fact of life. I understand waiting to do the time for the crime as it were until the trip is over. It would ruin the vacation for everyone.


I loved the fried green tomato sandwich in February. It just had so much flavor to it.


That shirt is great!!
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Old 10-29-2012, 12:03 AM   #267
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Leaving Robert to nap, E and I went to DCA, where he had the old tried and true kid's meal bean and cheese burrito.

Alas, it was NOT the tried and true. They've made the tortilla a horrid, DRY, whole wheat atrocity. And they replaced the Mexican rice with brown rice with peas and carrots.



Eamon was NOT impressed.







I went to talk to the CM, and she told me that this is some California thing, giving healthy options for children. However, when there's no other choice, it's not an *option*. Disneyland is a day, or maybe a week, out of a child's life. And healthy food that's not eaten has ZERO nutritious value. Oily Mexican rice has rice, has spices, and oil isn't ALL bad, especially at Disney, because it's not lard, but vegetable oil. And even the lard being bad thing could be argued by the Paleo diet people! (obviously I disagree, but I have very healthy friends who thrive on Paleo, or at least for the past year)

They told me to go up to the window and ask for the old rice, which is available for adults. Once that was done, he was happier.




The tortilla was sidestepped by opening it up and eating the beans and cheese inside. Getting it replaced might be a bigger problem, since the flour tortillas for adult meals are much much bigger than the one for kids.

I also had a kid's meal, and I choked down the rice, which was absolutely terrible. I've had good brown rice with peas and carrots, and that, my friends, is NOT good brown rice with peas and carrots.

It was Sunday of Gay Days weekend, and seeing all the happy couples walking around in red shirts made me miss my BIL and his partner so much! (I never would have said that with the ex, not even a little bit) We were so sad they couldn't make it. Last night I made sure they knew that we would love to go with them next year, and maybe they can plan for it through this year.

But even really pleasant evenings at DCA must come to an end, especially the ones that are on the last night of the trip.
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Old 10-29-2012, 12:08 AM   #268
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I make Mexican rice with brown rice, I prefer brown rice but not everyone does. You know as well as I do that healthy food can be yummy. I don't get it. Wheat tortillas are rather awful.
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Old 10-29-2012, 12:10 AM   #269
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kaoden39 View Post
He has got to go. Who knows what he is saying to her? Let Robert deal with her. What about SIL? Why isn't she helping more with her mother? I'm sorry if I am being nosy. I just know that if it was my mom no matter how busy I might be I would be deep in it working this out.
Knowing what I know about SIL, this is what we can expect from her. They had a rocky relationship and SIL has had a rocky life, and right now she is knee deep in bettering herself and raising her daughters. She's also nearly 3 hours' drive away. With what I know about her, this is fine. I understand.

I also remember that when my mom was diagnosed with leukemia, I was never able to get out to see her. I had a new job with absolutely no time off accrued yet, I had no money to actually get there, and my mom was really weak with chemo. Once she was on a break from chemo, I got the nasty horrible flu, so bad I truly thought I'd seen the last of the world as I went to bed 12/31/99. I was incredibly surprised when I woke up in 2000, because I had been so sick. So I had to recuperate, then she was back in chemo, then I caught a cold, and back and forth. Finally we had it planned for me to fly out, and then she died.

It still gets to me sometimes, that I didn't quit my job and just move back home, but that didn't feel like an option then. So if anyone needs to cut her some slack, especially given her past, it's me.

And she has been really sweet to me, thanking me at every turn, even in "public" on FB.


The ex has GOT to go. I hope that BIL can figure that out soon.
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Old 10-29-2012, 12:12 AM   #270
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Originally Posted by kaoden39 View Post
I make Mexican rice with brown rice, I prefer brown rice but not everyone does.
Oh, I should have said that there were NO spices whatsoever, not even salt, in the brown rice with peas and carrots. It's not *Mexican* anymore for the kids. It's like British food now, LOL. But without any butter, even. Because that would be unhealthy, of course.

And when you look on the menuboard, you don't know, because it doesn't say whole wheat or bland rice...it just says burrito, and it says "rice", which I don't remember if it's a difference or not.
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