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Old 12-23-2012, 10:01 AM   #451
Buckalew11
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Originally Posted by WDWBarb View Post
Wow - what a great opportunity - pretty awesome for the first semester of college!

It is a great opportunity. She's been around it all her life so she's doing things many student athletic trainers never get to do in college. She's spoken to some FR friends at other colleges who were not even allowed to tape this semester! DD was working the field and even helped spine board 2 players (in one game! one from their team and one from the other--thank God they were both fine.)

I know the head trainer has loved finally having her officially there but at the same time, I think they did have some issues to overcome. That's been good for her also--it is not easy confronting issues sometimes and it is a good life experience.

Happy that she took the bull by the horns in many situations--tutoring for the trouble class, issues when tutors did not show when they were supposed to, she was sick 2x and they do not have health services but she called the doctor and saw them all on her own (which she always has done since she could drive there) and many other things.

She really does not "need" me anymore but I guess that is a good thing. So, now we're already in that next phase of the mother/daughter relationship. I'm not much of a lover of change but I know this is what we've worked for.

And, I will say, it is nice having her home now because I'm suffering from shin splints in my right leg and I have a WDW 1/2 marathon in 3 weeks. I've had ice massage and tape jobs on my shin. I might need her more than she needs me!
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Old 12-26-2012, 03:06 PM   #452
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My DH and I did that all for ourselves too. And my one DD can do it for herself. But when you are dealing with a child with a disability it is a whole new situation. And dealing with the office of the Students With Disabilities is a whole new situation.

So yes, be very thankful if you have kids who can do all of this themselves. I am hopeful my DD will be able to do this eventually. My 'hope' is by her Junior year. But DH and I decided that the 'goal' is for her to finish college and so if that means we have to step in and help her with some of the little things, we are doing it. But believe me, I wish she could do it herself. It breaks my heart that she can't. And even having the label of being a 'disabled student' isn't something anyone really wants to have. BUT I am grateful she has the chance to go to college. I am grateful for the things the office of disabilities have done for her. But college is college, and it is rough and if you are someone who doesn't 'fit the mold' of the typical college student it is even rougher.

(Oh and I am also dealing with a medical issue that may mean I won't be here for long....although I am hopeful a year from now I can say that all is fine and I am well....but I also know they can't depend on me forever, which is why helping her get this degree now and not having her wait until she is older and more mature and possibly more capable of handling everything is important. I may not be here in 5 years when she would probably be more ready to go through college. But right now, I think (hope) she can do it if DH and I help her with the little things like figuring out a good schedule for her with instructors that would do better with her disability. I really truly hope that in a couple of years we see her taking over more....but again, when you deal with a disability it is a whole different world and you are sort of on your own to figure all of this out and it is scary...believe me, there have been a lot of tears on my part wishing my DD could do all the things her peers could do right now.....but she is getting there in her own time.)
Both my girls have disabilities as well - I just made sure that they learned to cope with their issues before college. Oldest could have been labeled on the spectrum, Asperger's/HFA/sensory disorder, but since I work in special education I was able to get her needs met without an IEP or official interventions from the school, and avoidance techniques were not allowed. She's a senior at MIT, and looking forward to graduation.

Youngest is a freshman in college, and has a few birth defects that make it hard for her to see in one eye, among other issues. She also has synesthesia, which is not a disability, but makes learning tricky for her too. She may never get her driver's license, so she had to choose a school near good public transportation, or get used to either bumming rides or not coming home very often. She has learned to pace herself with her classwork, as she cannot study/cram because of her vision issues. She could have another eye surgery, but it wouldn't completely fix the issue, and she would have to relearn (again) how to focus/read/etc.

I stopped intervening in their academic issues after elementary school. Middle school was tough, but they learned a lot about social skills, some of it the hard way. If they misbehaved, I was not going to bail them out or give an excuse. High school was a breeze as they knew that they had to do it all themselves, from picking classes to applying for scholarships and college. I signed checks and forms. Oh, and filled out the FAFSA. I answered questions, but only if they asked me.
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Old 12-26-2012, 04:43 PM   #453
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Schmeck View Post
Both my girls have disabilities as well - I just made sure that they learned to cope with their issues before college. Oldest could have been labeled on the spectrum, Asperger's/HFA/sensory disorder, but since I work in special education I was able to get her needs met without an IEP or official interventions from the school, and avoidance techniques were not allowed. She's a senior at MIT, and looking forward to graduation.

Youngest is a freshman in college, and has a few birth defects that make it hard for her to see in one eye, among other issues. She also has synesthesia, which is not a disability, but makes learning tricky for her too. She may never get her driver's license, so she had to choose a school near good public transportation, or get used to either bumming rides or not coming home very often. She has learned to pace herself with her classwork, as she cannot study/cram because of her vision issues. She could have another eye surgery, but it wouldn't completely fix the issue, and she would have to relearn (again) how to focus/read/etc.

I stopped intervening in their academic issues after elementary school. Middle school was tough, but they learned a lot about social skills, some of it the hard way. If they misbehaved, I was not going to bail them out or give an excuse. High school was a breeze as they knew that they had to do it all themselves, from picking classes to applying for scholarships and college. I signed checks and forms. Oh, and filled out the FAFSA. I answered questions, but only if they asked me.
That is wonderful! Hopefully one day my DD will get to that point too. They all get there in their own time (and depending on their disability). I still have hope my DD will get there too. So glad yours was able to already.
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Old 04-02-2013, 09:54 AM   #454
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With the first year winding down how has everyone (and their students)held up?

DD is doing well so far. about a month before the semester is over and exams start. She has decided to minor in Spanish which may add some time but she was on track to graduate in 3.5 years anyway. DD had an interview with a resort about 30 min from campus for a part time position in recreation. She had a 2nd interview with them last week and was told they would let her know in a week or so. If she gets the job she'll be staying in the area for the summer.
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Old 04-02-2013, 11:51 AM   #455
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With the first year winding down how has everyone (and their students)held up?

DD is doing well so far. about a month before the semester is over and exams start. She has decided to minor in Spanish which may add some time but she was on track to graduate in 3.5 years anyway. DD had an interview with a resort about 30 min from campus for a part time position in recreation. She had a 2nd interview with them last week and was told they would let her know in a week or so. If she gets the job she'll be staying in the area for the summer.
First year almost over.. I can't believe it!! It went so fast.

My son is a totally different person, college has transformed him. He LOVES it, more than I expected and I knew he'd like it but not as much as he does. He was always too OLD for any age so being with people in his own mindset is a major upgrade.

He loves his teachers, especially a particular 25yo cutie he has taken TWICE! He taped her class on his Iphone and I fell in love with her, too! She has a quirky, open way of teaching kids and has them run the class WITH her. She does a speed dating thing where everyone has to say SOMETHING. My son is uber shy but she brought him out of it. All of the kids love her, he's trying to find a way to have again next year.

So far, so good. College is what he needed to bring him out. I love the NEW HIM!
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Old 04-02-2013, 02:25 PM   #456
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My son has acclimated very well and LOVES UNT. He is surrounded by music which has really fueled his passion for music studies. He joined a band with some buddies (at UNT, bands form and break up daily!), began pledging this semester to a music fraternity, and has maintained a good gpa.

He applied to become an RA for next fall and has passed a couple of the interview process steps...just waiting to get called in by a dorm that may need him for another interview. We are so hoping he's chosen as this will take care of his room and board, plus a small monthly stipend

This fall my daughter begins her Sr. year and we get to do this all over again!!
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Old 04-02-2013, 07:26 PM   #457
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DD LOVES college!! She is on the dance team and they are headed to Nationals next week in FL.. how exciting!! She is doing well and never comes home (she is an hour away) I am so happy for her!! I can't believe 1 year is almost gone...wow 3 more years..this will fly by~~
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Old 04-02-2013, 07:41 PM   #458
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That is wonderful! Hopefully one day my DD will get to that point too. They all get there in their own time (and depending on their disability). I still have hope my DD will get there too. So glad yours was able to already.
Thank you for the kind words, and I agree, they all get there, if we let them. They need help, of course, but I'm a firm believer of tough love. Let them fail in a safe environment so they see the world doesn't end, but let them feel the disappointment too. Both my girls called me once from middle school because of forgotten homework/project. Told them I could get the project to school on my lunch break, and the charge was $10. Both girls did it just once.

Getting ready for my oldest to graduate from MIT this June. My younger one is settling in well in school, finding it much easier than her very demanding junior and senior years in high school, and has been selected by a professor as one of 5 research assistants-in-training. First time the school has let freshmen touch the pricey lab equipment (the million dollar machines). I pray each night that she doesn't break anything Back in high school, she and her lab partner set their chemistry lab on fire, by accident. Luckily, it was contained to the lab bench...
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Old 04-02-2013, 08:20 PM   #459
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It's been an OK year. DD is mostly living at home now (wasn't I the one moaning and whining that DD never came home at first?) because she couldn't tolerate the extreme amount of drinking and partying on campus. She was at the ER too often, taking her friends that had over-indulged, and just decided one day that if she wasn't there, she wouldn't feel so responsible for everyone.

She's not loving her school and the current administration, so I'm not 100% sure that she'll continue there. Thankfully, we are college-rich in my area so she has many others to choose from.

She's also changed her major, but I totally expected that to happen. I changed mine many times (and still don't know what I want to be when I grow up!).

But it's all good.
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Old 04-02-2013, 08:23 PM   #460
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It has been a good year for DD I think. She spent Spring Break in Portland, OR where she is dreaming of grad school. You know, I think we really need to have a talk about enjoying the moment and not always looking ahead. *sigh* She seems happy at school but always looking too far ahead.
She's made some really nice friends although her and her roommate aren't great together--nothing terrible but they will not be rooming together next year.

Not sure what she's planning for summer but I feel sure she is hoping to make Portland work. (For a summer job)
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Old 04-02-2013, 08:25 PM   #461
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My son is the youngest of three by a lot, and he was so ready for college. It took him about an hour to adjust, I think. He has a tight group of friends and has enjoyed most of his classes. He has been home only at fall break, Thanksgiving and Christmas. Fortunately, we've been there a few times. Theatre is his passion and he will be in his third play later this month. It's wonderful to see him so happy.
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Old 04-02-2013, 08:47 PM   #462
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DD is having a great year (well - at least after she was able to dump the partying roommate and move into a single in October).

She will be working on campus this summer, in their freshman oreintation program. It is a great opportunity for her, and while I'm a little sad she won't be home for most of the summer, I am really happy for her.

The spring parent's weekend is conveniently over her birthday weekend. So we'll be able to celebrate, with a nice dinner, cake and presents!

She continues to love her school, and she is getting pretty active in some business-related organizations as well as her sorority.
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Old 04-02-2013, 10:08 PM   #463
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DS is having a great year. He made Dean's List first semester. This semester has been harder, but his girlfriend's father died suddenly in February, and he took it real hard.

He applied for an RA position, and got it!! He will be in one of the suites dorms, so that is super nice. This is going to help so much, with housing/meal plan taken care of. He gets paid too, plus his current boss in IT wants him to continue working there too.
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Old 04-03-2013, 06:26 AM   #464
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Can't believe first year is almost over! Ds is loving it but I worry about all the changes around him. 3 of his very good friends from home have dropped out of their schools to transfer to a local school. Over spring break they were pressuring ds to do the same. So far he is holding ground. He loves the people. Professors not so much. But hopefully next semester that may change. He has a serious girlfriend, since September. she is a very sweet girl. I really like her. And he is so happy.

We pick him up in just a couple weeks! They get out mid April! I think the girlfriend is coming to stay as soon as she gets out. She goes to a school across the street from ds. I am amazed but not surprised about all the kids ds has met from other schools.

Now if he can line up his summer job we'll be set.
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Old 04-03-2013, 01:38 PM   #465
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It's so hard to believe it's the last month of their freshman year! DD loves the social aspects, is active in her sorority, and has made some close friends she plans to room with in the house next year. Mostly it's been fine but sometimes it's easier when she's at school!

She has not come home as much and when she does, it's to visit friends and we barely see her anyway. She has changed in that she is not as worried and not sure about her path like she was in HS.

In many ways, I'm glad she has eased up on herself but the lack of planning now drives me a little crazy sometimes. We had to have Easter at lunchtime because she had not coordinated her ride back to school and we had no idea when she'd be leaving. She has also not really worked on a summer job opp yet. She is still a Bio major but thinking about nursing. I tried to make some suggestions when she asked but mostly, I stay out of it and try to be patient as she figures it all out.

We have to pick up her stuff in early May but she is staying for a sorority rush orientation then heading to the beach for 5 days with friends. I worry about all the money she is spending but she says it's under control.

It's definitely been interesting to navigate this new stage! We've gotten used to her being gone so I hope this summer goes smoothly.
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