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Old 12-26-2011, 12:01 PM   #121
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Alice, I am sorry for your family's loss. So good that you see the positive in the timing being unusual that she did not answer the phone.

It is very healing to look for the silver lining in the midst of tragedy.

Glad your health has remained well, and glad we heard from you, even with the sad news.

It would be wonderful to have you post more often.

Sha, you gotta love Skype. I think you all will have a wonderful time over New Year's eve. How nice that you will be together at SS with your mom, one of your sisters and your nieces, and of course, R.

We finally heard from my brother who has lived in Costa Rica. The last time we heard anything from him was July. My mother was upset yesterday as she finally decided to email him (the priest told her to do it for penance during her pre-Christmas confession) several week ago. Yesterday mom's mind went to the place that he must be dead if he had not answered her email. My sister got on face book, set up an account (never had had one) and found him, befriended him) and then received an email from him. He is supposed to call mom today. Since she knows he is alive, my mom is now hoping to hear he is doing well. Maybe my sister and I are cynics but we expect he will beg for money. Hopefully he will prove us wrong, and he is doing better.

MaryAnn, glad you youngest did well as Joseph. That must have been a moving experience.

My experience has been that men can be clueless about gifts. I think your idea about money gifts for the kids is a good one. I might go that way next year although I have said that before and I never stick to it. I get carried away with everyone else shopping. Maybe I need to get a new hobby to concentrate on during Christmas. I am definitely staying away from the stores today. It is very wet and yucky here anyway today.

However, Christmas eve we had glorious weather day and night. The bonfires were amazing. My iPhone pictures don't capture it so I am going to take a look at the 35 mm ones DH and DD16 took, and hope to post the best one. I had forgotten how many fireworks were set off all along the levee on the river side. The fireworks continued for about an hour and made the perfect back drop for the burning structures. My mom, sister and her DH and DS23 and DD21 decided to drive up and down river road, DD16 wanted to walk up closer, along the levee, so that is what she, DH and I did.

We went down to New Orleans Christmas day and ate at my MIL's house that was gutted and restored after Katrina where DH's god child Jennifer now lives (she is the OB GYN doc who graduated from med school the year after Katrina for the old timers here that might remember Jen's story). We had a great time, although it was hard to see that my MIL's senility has accelerated.
She was very confused about who DD16 was, and she took care of DD16 from the time she was a baby until she was 2 years old when I worked part time in New Orleans. MIL repeated stuff constantly and was very vehement about what she was talking about. She did however, laugh and smile a lot, and I sat by her throughout the meal. Jennifer told me when we were cleaning up that I was very good with my MIL as she is usually sort of mean and outspoken. Jen was glad to see my MIL (her grandmother) laugh and smile. At least she does not seem frustrated to be confused as to who each of us are. She did call me by my name once, without me saying it, but asked someone else where two of her sons were who were there. She is getting them mixed up, but seems to take it in stride.

DS23 promised her he would visit her more. DH and I plan to visit more too. Her disease is just moving to quickly.

On my side of the family, we had a relaxed dinner Christmas eve before going down to see the bonfires. DD16 brought her new soprano ukelele and my sister played Christmas carols on her guitar along with DD16 on the ukelele. It was wonderful. We did have a pie incident though-I ordered three pies, and DS23 was really looking forward to having chocolate pie. We opened the box that was marked chocolate pie and it was a lemon meringue pie. He was highly indignant and intends to give the poor girls as the bakery a hard time He took pictures for evidence. We had a good laugh along with him about it. Funny thing is that the girl checking me out Saturday afternoon double checked the labels on the outside of the boxes to make sure the pies were the ones I ordered. I never thought to look inside the box. It is not like checking out the looks of a cake that you ordered, pies are pies. But I can assure y'all that a lemon meringue pie is NOT an acceptable stand in for chocolate pie in my son's book!!

GAGWTA!!
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Old 12-26-2011, 02:54 PM   #122
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Here we go, closeup of a bonfire, about half burned down.
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Old 12-26-2011, 02:58 PM   #123
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Here is a shot of a series of bonfires with the fireworks in the sky.

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Old 12-26-2011, 04:49 PM   #124
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wow Laurie, those pictures are awesome. Fireworks too that go along with the bonfires!

Hope your brother comes through for your mom. I am sure it would make her holiday if she heard from him.

Sha - so glad you got to skype

Well dh has hopefully fixed the toilet. What a mess. A root got up into the toilet pipe. He had to attack it, disassemble the toilet. Now we are using weed killer and hopefully this will get solved. I am so blessed that he is so mechanical and handy. A real Mr. Fix it for sure! And if this doesnt work, then at least the plumbers job will be a it easier.
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Old 12-28-2011, 10:58 AM   #125
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Hope everyone is enjoying their week.

Lisa - thinking of you and hoping your visits go well

Candy - hope you survive your road trip and visit with the relatives

Well lots of rain yesterday. So much better than snow for sure!

Dh an I went to the movies yest. We wanted to see War Horse (me) or Sherlock Holmes (him). When we got there they wre both sold out and the only movie that was not sold out was Alvin and The Chipmunks. We just came home. Went out for chinese food later. oh well.

I am thankful for the little things in life, like flushing the toilet with no problems

Today some of the ds and I might be going to a wedding. A girl they know and I know her and her grandparents. Its informal. I think I will just wear black pants and a dressy top. Just the wedding. I told them I need to go and get a card etc.

GAGWTA.
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Old 12-28-2011, 04:47 PM   #126
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Wow So much I missed!

Alice- So sorry to hear about your loss. It so good to hear from you.

Ann- I hope Avery go to spend time at home. But I don't think with your family support he will lack anything! I hope that he is feeling better and they find out what is causing the fever.

Lisa- Glad to hear you are moving and shakin'. I hope you had a great time with your kids!

Sha- Stranger! Miss ya here. Glad Mom is doing well and you received such good news!

PNM- Luv ya! You are always so informative and sweet.

LMP- We can use ham our way too! Your gift....you know how guys are. GC or money is a good idea. Glad DH got rid of the root and toilet fixed. I am sorry your DH can't be with your during your testing We are with you in spirit!!!! How did the wedding go? We actually never went out of town. My payroll messed up my check and I was 20 hours short. So we are going this weekend and my Mom and Sister are keeping my Big Baby!

Snappy- Those bonfire pictures are awesome and seem like a great fun for family.

Leslie!!! Welcome to the family! We are a hodgepodge of sistas bonded by a common enemy! Cancer. We are here for you....whenever you need us. Thanks for sharing with us!

GAGWTA!!!
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Old 12-29-2011, 02:38 PM   #127
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Good afternoon sistas

Linda - how did the christmas shift go? I am sure you were not doing chair races

Laurie - My ds would have been bummed too with the lemon meringue instead of chocolate.

Candy - well hope you have a nice trip this week end. Is someone still going to keep an eye on your house?

Well the wedding was nice. More crowded then I thought. Since there were no ushers I think we actually sat on the grooms side. Oh well, who cares. Some guy behind us whispered and asked us which side we were on?? The bride looked beautiful. Ah... love makes the world go round. They are moving to Calif. and her grandma who she lived with has cancer too and is taking it hard etc.
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Old 12-30-2011, 04:09 AM   #128
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Hi ladies! I hope everyone had a good Christmas. Seems like things are just so incredibly busy this time of year.....finally have caught up with everything at home after our whirlwind trip to WDW, got back the day before Christmas Eve. Can't for the life of me figure out why I thought that would be a good time for a vacation!

Disney was a great time, we really liked POR. The parks were much busier than I thought they would be....MK was open until 3am one night, and extended the regular hours until 1am on another...we always hit the parks early, took an afternoon nap, and then stayed out late every night.

Ate much too much, as per usual! Tried Yatchsman Steakhouse for the first time. Sad to say we found the steaks to be just so very average. I had the filet and DH had the ribeye....but the rolls, oh my, were they ever delicious! DH had a cheese/sausage/pate appetizer that he was really impressed with, so overall we still enjoyed the meal, but probably won't go back. As usual, Raglan Road was wonderful! Also had my favorite dessert on property, the chocolate banana creme brûlée from Kona....yum!

Christmas was great, just really busy. DD and DSIL were able to come home from Boston so that was nice. DD22 and her boyfriend and my mom were also here for dinner on the Eve. We grilled a variety of meats for Christmas Eve....weird, I know, but it's what they wanted to do! Then had 25 people over Xmas dinner. I was so exhausted, on Monday I literally slept all day!

Went to see the oncologist today to discuss my last CT scan.....it is still looking good! He is baffled, said he has never had anyone with mets to the stomach respond like I have. No idea how long it may last, but I sure am very grateful for the past 6 months! I'll have another CT in March....and in the meantime I try not to waste any time thinking about it, but it's always there, like a big weight hanging over my head.

Snappy, love the bonfire pics! That looks very impressive, and a lot of fun. Had to laugh at your chocolate pie mix up.....hope your DS doesn't have to wait too long to get one!

LMP, sorry to hear about the movie not working out. DH went to see Mission Impossible yesterday, it was good. We saw it in IMAX, so that was pretty cool. Glad the wedding was nice. And yea for no more plumbing problems!

Candy, have a good trip this weekend!

Sha, sounds like a great time in the treehouse! We took the boat between POR
and downtown Disney a few times last week and went by the tree houses
several times.....quite a few of them were decorated with Christmas lights, nice!

Alice, so sorry about your MIL.

Anybody having/going to New Years Eve parties? Not us, it's our traditional night to take the tree down.....LOL, yep, we are party animals for sure.

GAGWTA!!!!
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Old 12-30-2011, 08:49 AM   #129
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Hi Everyone!

Sorry I haven't been on all week. I broke the news to my daughter and the rest of my and my husbands families. DD is taking this well. She got a little teary eyed at first but we reassured her everything was going to be just fine. It will just be a rough few months. We are going to visit friends today - the Mom just finished her treatments for breast cancer and the daughter is a schoolmate of my daughters. I think it will be good for her to have someone to talk to who has been through some of this.

I went for an MRI Wednesday and got the results yesterday. There is no cancer in my other breast. The breast with the cancer, however, shows extensive cancer almost to the muscle. The surgeon is recommending a mastectomy. I have an appointment with a plastic surgeon on January 11th and am waiting to hear back on a surgery date. To tell you the truth I am a little bit freaked out by this. I was ok when she called me but this morning I think it has sunk in. Who here has been through a mastectomy? Any advice on what to expect? We have a cruise booked for mid-April and the surgery is at the end of January. Any advice on whether to cancel / postpone? Final payment is due the end of January so there is still time to back out.

Snappy, I love your bonfire pictures. That looks like so much fun, especially with the fireworks.
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Old 12-30-2011, 10:27 AM   #130
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Boy, that MRI was helpful in your decision making, huh? That's good!

If you look back to page 5 here, someone else asked about mastectomies and got answers there. Ask if you have more specific questions. Also www.breastcancer.org and www.susanlove.org are good informational websites.

Are you by any chance on Fantasy in April? I might say postpone but I know how much prices have jumped up. Is it just your immediate family or are you going with a group? That's a tough one. We still don't know if you'll be doing chemo yet, do we? If you are, that will be in the midst of that, and in that case I might wait until I was feeling better. If no chemo, then maybe. There can often be little annoying problems that crop up after any surgery that might make it difficult to be out of the country and such, though. Tough choice.
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Old 12-30-2011, 12:53 PM   #131
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Mer mom, thanks for the update. I am glad you will be able to just worry about one side, not two.

As for the mastectomy, it takes several months for the wound to heal, especially with reconstruction. The main area of pain as far as the breast goes, is the underarm area if nodes are removed, which dissipates over time. You will have exercises to do to make sure you regain mobility in the arm.

What kind of reconstruction are you thinking about, tissue transfer of implants? That would change how I would look at this, IF you are not facing chemo.

Tissue transfer is big surgery, actually much more involved than the mastectomy, as you have multiple incisions, could have three if you have the unaffected breast lifted or reduced.

I went nowhere for a month after the free tram flap done two years post mastectomy. And I healed real well. Biggest problem was the stomach incision, hurt a good bit even with the binder to give it support. Three months is longer but I think a six month interval would be preferable.

That is a big decision and one I would address to both of your doctors. My reconstruction was five years ago, and I am sure there have been improvements in flap surgery if that is the way you are going. The Diep method is especially said to be easier to recoup from since the muscle in the abdomen is not cut in that procedure. There was no one in my location who was doing DiEPs in 2006.

I would definitely discuss as I am sure you intend to your planned trip with both surgeons and get their input.

You may not have the pathology from the mastectomy back before your final payment on the cruise. Do you think you could request more time from the cruise line, due to the circumstances, or are there deadlines set in stone?

Worth an inquiry.

I did not have chemo so can't add much to discussion on whether you would be ready for a cruise three months after embarking on chemo. Heck, I do no know how long chemo treatment takes, but I know that varies greatly, and can be drawn out if you have a reaction.

Breastcancer.org is an excellent resource.

Glad your daughter took things so well. It is wonderful that she will have someone to talk about your diagnosis with. Be sure she understands that each case is different, and how much results vary from one woman to another.

Would love for you to keep us updated.
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Old 12-30-2011, 01:05 PM   #132
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Hey, ladies...I need some advice, thoughts, and prayers...
ABout a week ago, I discovered a lump in my breast. I let it go a bit, thinking it was maybe breastfeeding related (I am breastfeeding a 3 week old baby). I was a little concerned, though, since I googled it and found that it was "bad' that the lump was in the outer top quadrant and oblong. I went to the the dr. Wednesday and she sent me for an ultrasound. She didn't make it sound like a big deal, saying it was hard to get a good feel on it with the milk in there. I had an ultrasound yesterday and the tech showed it to the radiologist who wanted a mammogram (really concerning since they had just told me they don't do mammos if breastfeeding). I started crying and cryed through the whole thing. The tech told me she'd talk to the radiologist and have an answer for me. She then came back and said he was really busy and they'd send it to my dr. I called the dr. and they said the radiologist recommended a core biopsy. *Cue more extensive bawling*
Any advice, info., ANYTHING? I am 35 and have 3 children, one of whom is 3 weeks old. I can't stop crying and the older DCs are really worried about. I don't want to tell them anything, so I said I was really stressed.
Help!
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Old 12-30-2011, 01:13 PM   #133
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LMP, glad you were able to go to the wedding. Hope your DH's efforts with the plumbing issue was successful. That was a serious job he tackled. Glad he was able to get to it before he has to travel. Was it a live oak root that caused the problem? Those things are insidious.

Cheryl, it slipped my mind you were doing a Christmas trip. Don't you guys usually go in January and rent a house? Sounds like POR was just the ticket. I have never been during the holidays. I respect your bravery.

Wonderful to hear your oncologist had good news.

No NYE parties for me. Taking down the decorations is actually a good plan, but I don't think we will do it. Sounds like DH plans to work some each day except maybe Monday.

DD21 is leaving tomorrow after a 10 day visit. It has been nice, but I don;t like having to work while she is here, like I did this week. Last night I told her I was off today but ended up going in for an hour. She seemed bummed when she woke up and I was gone, but I got home fairly quickly. She has a lot to do before she leaves.

It is a beautiful day here and should stay nice and warm for a few days except maybe Sunday. I am making my crawfish ettouffee for dinner tonight, had some tails frozen from last season. We went out to eat Tuesday night at a seafood restaurant and had lots of oysters, shrimp, and a fresh tuna salad for DD16. Everyone enjoyed having something different, better than at home when we eat the same stuff, lol

GAGWTA ladies
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Old 12-30-2011, 01:47 PM   #134
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Paintnolish, we must have been posting at the same time.

I understand your anxiety and fear, perfectly natural. You are in that exquisite time in the first few weeks with your newborn which reminds me of a honeymoon. I am so sorry this scare has happened during this time to interrupt your first weeks with the new one.

However, it is good that you found the lump and followed up on it. I really don't have any insight into the prevalence of this happening so soon after giving birth. It would have been great if you could have received more info from the medical people you saw or talked to over the phone. Is your doctor available? I believe I would want to speak to him/her, I assume a OBGYN, rather than someone on his/her staff.

The stereotactic core needle biopsy is the definitive way to know what is going on, not the mammogram or ultrasound, even a diagnostic mammogram is not truly diagnostic. It just means magnified views.

Try and get advice from your doctor, or insist on speaking directly to the radiologist who is calling for the biopsy. It may be that they are ordering it due to an abundance of caution, but you should be told more, I believe. I can only imagine how painful that mammogram was for an active breastfeeding mom.

The stereotactic core needle biopsy is not as invasive as a surgical biopsy. I received a little brochure describing the procedure when I talked to the radiologist after the second mammogram. It does not sound like you have that info, but I will see what I can find regarding the procedure and post here for you on this thread.

I waited to tell my children after I knew more after the biopsy. You might consider doing that.

A good statistic that I have seen and believe is true is that only 20% of the biopsies that are done result in a cancer diagnosis. Small consolation right now, but still good odds overall.

I am glad you found our thread and posted. I am sure others will chime in.

Will keep you in my thoughts and prayers, and hope to hear from you further.
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Old 12-30-2011, 01:49 PM   #135
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Quote:
Originally Posted by paintnolish View Post
Hey, ladies...I need some advice, thoughts, and prayers...
ABout a week ago, I discovered a lump in my breast. I let it go a bit, thinking it was maybe breastfeeding related (I am breastfeeding a 3 week old baby). I was a little concerned, though, since I googled it and found that it was "bad' that the lump was in the outer top quadrant and oblong. I went to the the dr. Wednesday and she sent me for an ultrasound. She didn't make it sound like a big deal, saying it was hard to get a good feel on it with the milk in there. I had an ultrasound yesterday and the tech showed it to the radiologist who wanted a mammogram (really concerning since they had just told me they don't do mammos if breastfeeding). I started crying and cryed through the whole thing. The tech told me she'd talk to the radiologist and have an answer for me. She then came back and said he was really busy and they'd send it to my dr. I called the dr. and they said the radiologist recommended a core biopsy. *Cue more extensive bawling*
Any advice, info., ANYTHING? I am 35 and have 3 children, one of whom is 3 weeks old. I can't stop crying and the older DCs are really worried about. I don't want to tell them anything, so I said I was really stressed.
Help!
Oh, Hey! I'm sorry to hear you've had such a rough few days!

I honestly don't know a whole heck of a lot about lumps during breastfeeding, but I have seen mention of them here and there and that they often turn out ok. The thing about it is, nobody can really say that for sure until they actually examine the tissue, which is done via a biopsy. Cause as unlikely as it is, things can still occur even when we're young and at awful times like having just had a baby.

But let's look at the positives:

80% of solid lumps are benign
Lumps can occur during breastfeeding that are not cancer
Even in a worst case scenario in that it is cancer, you'd be very unlikely to die from it

Hope that makes you feel a little better?

Anyone else have some words of wisdom for paintolish? (Ah, I see snappy answered above!)
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