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Old 10-01-2011, 08:21 AM   #1
nycdisneygal
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What to take to memorial service?

I am going to a memorial service today--my former high school music teacher!! ( I graduated in 1994). She died in jan-her daughter wrote to me then to tell me (i had only been keeping in touch my sending xmas cards to her lately). I sent a sympathy card. The memorial service is now. I asked if i could help or bring anything -they said no its ok -it will be wine and cheese in their garden. DO i bring anything anyways? What is apprpriate?
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Old 10-01-2011, 08:34 AM   #2
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Personally, I don't think I would take anything. I have never heard of bringing food to a memorial service. I am sure I will be proved wrong though.

Sorry for your loss. And so nice that you kept in touch all these years.
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Old 10-01-2011, 08:39 AM   #3
Swan4Me
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I have never heard of waiting 9 months for a memorial
It probably will not be a traditional service-which ususally takes place in a church or other meeting place, and you wouldnt bring food to that sort of event either
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Old 10-01-2011, 10:54 AM   #4
nycdisneygal
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THanks for your replies!

(i do regret not trying to visit with her recently)
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Old 10-01-2011, 11:02 AM   #5
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I wouldn't bring anything, but I'd write a really nice letter to the family expressing what your teacher meant to you. They will treasure it.
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Old 10-01-2011, 02:19 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Swan4Me View Post
I have never heard of waiting 9 months for a memorial
It probably will not be a traditional service-which ususally takes place in a church or other meeting place, and you wouldnt bring food to that sort of event either
In the case of the OP, since she was told not to bring anything, she should honor the wishes of the deceased's relatives and not bring anything in the way of food.

Memorials can take place at any time. It may have been the wish of the deceased that a memorial be held at a certain season or date, or she may have donated her body to science and the family only just got the remains returned to them.

Memorials or funerals may be held at a funeral home, a church, or any gathering place of adequate size. Depending on the custom of the community, food may be brought for a meal afterward. Sometimes food is brought to the home of the bereaved after a death in the family. I know I was glad no one brought any casseroles to my house when my mom passed because I didn't have room left in my freezer for anything else at that time.

People did bring food for my uncle's funeral recently but they were members of the same church and that was the custom there that members of the congregation provide a meal after the funeral.
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