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Old 08-18-2011, 01:19 PM   #91
leighe
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My FIL had to move in with us because he has nothing and did absolutely nothing to prepare for old age/retirement. He is the king of the entitlement mentality and just seems to have assumed that someone will always take care of him (and I guess he was right). He also has alcohol-induced dementia, so he can't be left alone for very long. He's like a giant 3 year old in some ways.

The worst part is that he was a HORRIBLE father to DH (never paid child support, went to prision, was emotionally abusive) so it's pretty stressful having him here in the house because there is so much underlying resentment of him by both DH and me. But what could we do? We couldn't let him end up on the street.
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Old 08-18-2011, 01:25 PM   #92
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My MIL on our wedding night gave us an envelope with a letter in it telling us how important s*x(wasn't sure if I could put the actual word) was and a "how to" description. She isn't really evil or anything she is just not a nice person.
I'm sorry made that me laugh!
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Old 08-18-2011, 01:31 PM   #93
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Sometimes my ILs irritate me...but...WOW. This is amazing and sad all at the same time! I will never understand what posesses people to be so incredibly cruel to others.

That being said, this is also the MOST entertaining thread I've seen so far! I hope you are all getting a little therapy by sharing your stories!! You deserve it!
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Old 08-18-2011, 01:48 PM   #94
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Sometimes my ILs irritate me...but...WOW. This is amazing and sad all at the same time! I will never understand what posesses people to be so incredibly cruel to others.

That being said, this is also the MOST entertaining thread I've seen so far! I hope you are all getting a little therapy by sharing your stories!! You deserve it!
Back in my high school days, there were two of us in the show choir that our grandmothers lived with our families. We use to do take turns telling grandma horror stories to the rest of the group. We would have them in stitches. To us they weren't always funny, but it was great therapy for us to get the fustration out. Both of us hated having to live our teen years with these women in our daily lives, but couldn't complain to our parents because there was no other options.

I don't have much issue with my MIL, the older she has gotten the more mellow she has been. She was a dozy whie planning the wedding though. It's my mom that is the MIL from hell for DH.

She's so bad, DS16 has her number in his cell phone listed not as G-ma, but wicked witch. I really tried to yell at him and tell him that wasn't nice, but I was laughing to hard at. And forget DH saying anything to him, because once he saw that, he changed it on his phone as well. Both of them, as well as DD14, all have the wicked witch music from The Wizard of Oz on their phone as her ring tone.
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Old 08-18-2011, 03:05 PM   #95
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She's so bad, DS16 has her number in his cell phone listed not as G-ma, but wicked witch. I really tried to yell at him and tell him that wasn't nice, but I was laughing to hard at. And forget DH saying anything to him, because once he saw that, he changed it on his phone as well. Both of them, as well as DD14, all have the wicked witch music from The Wizard of Oz on their phone as her ring tone.
That is classic. I might have to steal this and get me a new ring tone
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Old 08-18-2011, 03:21 PM   #96
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Originally Posted by leighe View Post
My FIL had to move in with us because he has nothing and did absolutely nothing to prepare for old age/retirement. He is the king of the entitlement mentality and just seems to have assumed that someone will always take care of him (and I guess he was right). He also has alcohol-induced dementia, so he can't be left alone for very long. He's like a giant 3 year old in some ways.

The worst part is that he was a HORRIBLE father to DH (never paid child support, went to prision, was emotionally abusive) so it's pretty stressful having him here in the house because there is so much underlying resentment of him by both DH and me. But what could we do? We couldn't let him end up on the street.
Why not?
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Old 08-18-2011, 03:28 PM   #97
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Why not?
i'm wondering that as well. i'm surely not taking my mother in when her financial carelessness causes her to lose her home. she has inflicted way more than enough emotional & psychological trauma and pain on my family already. she can go live with DB and SIL.
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Old 08-18-2011, 03:29 PM   #98
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I can't resist!

1) On our wedding, the grandma of the MIL refused to come to the wedding because she thought she didn't get an invite......and no one in his family said congrats or brought a gift or did anything at all to acknowledge we were married.....(that should've been a sign for me)

2) For all grandkids, MIL would buy the combo strollers (carseat/stroller), well for dd, she just got a little nightgown. There were 2 other grandkids born that year and both were given a stroller combo and visited at the hospital. Not dd.

3) Has never once said Happy Birthday, but makes sure to call dh's ex on her birthday and send her a card...this is the woman they hated because of the things she did to dh and they didn't talk to her again till a few yrs after dh and I married.

4) Every year for Christmas, dd gets what the other nieces asked for. She never gets what is on her list, nor is asked. She is not into the same things as the other nieces so it is just a waste. MIL bought one thing for the niece and got the extra for $1.00, so that is what dd got for her b/day--the extra $1.00 thing while the niece got the $60 item and that was what she was going to buy anyway and there just happened to be a sale that day.

5) There are no pictures of me and dh in the house. Nor of dd. Only the children from his 1st marriage.

6) They go to all the other grandkids school events, have yet to go to one of dd's. Always an excuse not to attend. One year MIL was too sick to come, yet was out shopping that eveing.

7) MIL misses b/day parties, but does attend all the other grandkids parties.

8) SIL has a frame in her house, has all the nieces and nephews pictures in it.......except dd.

9) All the grandkids are invited over to spend a weekend with MIL in the summer and treated to dinner/movie......never has invited dd.

Yep......we keep a WIDE distance now!
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Old 08-18-2011, 03:40 PM   #99
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Originally Posted by need2cruise View Post
I can't resist!

1) On our wedding, the grandma of the MIL refused to come to the wedding because she thought she didn't get an invite......and no one in his family said congrats or brought a gift or did anything at all to acknowledge we were married.....(that should've been a sign for me)

2) For all grandkids, MIL would buy the combo strollers (carseat/stroller), well for dd, she just got a little nightgown. There were 2 other grandkids born that year and both were given a stroller combo and visited at the hospital. Not dd.

3) Has never once said Happy Birthday, but makes sure to call dh's ex on her birthday and send her a card...this is the woman they hated because of the things she did to dh and they didn't talk to her again till a few yrs after dh and I married.

4) Every year for Christmas, dd gets what the other nieces asked for. She never gets what is on her list, nor is asked. She is not into the same things as the other nieces so it is just a waste. MIL bought one thing for the niece and got the extra for $1.00, so that is what dd got for her b/day--the extra $1.00 thing while the niece got the $60 item and that was what she was going to buy anyway and there just happened to be a sale that day.

5) There are no pictures of me and dh in the house. Nor of dd. Only the children from his 1st marriage.

6) They go to all the other grandkids school events, have yet to go to one of dd's. Always an excuse not to attend. One year MIL was too sick to come, yet was out shopping that eveing.

7) MIL misses b/day parties, but does attend all the other grandkids parties.

8) SIL has a frame in her house, has all the nieces and nephews pictures in it.......except dd.

9) All the grandkids are invited over to spend a weekend with MIL in the summer and treated to dinner/movie......never has invited dd.

Yep......we keep a WIDE distance now!
We might just share a MIL
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Old 08-18-2011, 03:42 PM   #100
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He is the king of the entitlement mentality and just seems to have assumed that someone will always take care of him
Your father is Har..... (This post deleted before it became political)
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Old 08-18-2011, 03:44 PM   #101
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I have yet to see anyone's Out Laws say they should have not treated their cancer

How many Out Laws say

You should have died instead of treating your illness
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Old 08-18-2011, 04:01 PM   #102
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But what could we do? We couldn't let him end up on the street.
You are a better person than I. There is absolutely no reason I would EVER let my MIL stay with us. Ever. I honesty would let her rot in the street before taking her in. That end would suit her perfectly for all the evilness & manipulation she has done to my family.
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Old 08-18-2011, 04:02 PM   #103
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You need to put her in a home.
Why do you say that? because it would be easier? because if it happened to you that is what you would do? and nursing homes I don't trust, we have all ready had 1 incident when she was in a rehab/nursing home they discharged her with a uti-and those are actually dangerous to older people. she was confused and then she fell the same day she was discharged ,i'm talking as soon as we came home. ambulance had to take her to the hospital and she had to go to another rehab after that.

Putting her in a home wouldn't change how she is. This isn't a case of a dementia/alzheimers' person who was sweet before then changed, she has always been the way she is, even before I was born, even before she met my DF, according to my aunt and her friends from years ago. And honestly, I don't have it in me to discard her like that. Have you ever been to a nursing home and seen the patients who's relatives don't have anything to do with them for whatever reason?

There is no one else, my aunt lives in Florida, everyone else has passed on,moved away or not have anything to do with her. I am only child and thank God for that-because I would have had to take care of myself and a sibling.
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Old 08-18-2011, 04:07 PM   #104
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That is classic. I might have to steal this and get me a new ring tone
Reminds me of when DH used the Sanford and Son theme for his parents ringtone. Of course he used The Munsters for one sister and The Beverly hillbillies for another
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Old 08-18-2011, 05:39 PM   #105
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Why not?
Well, to be honest, if it were me, I would. But DH can't do that. I guess no matter what he is his father. I hate, hate, hate him being here. But I make the best of it because the last thing DH needs is me adding to his stress about the whole situation.
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