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Old 08-19-2011, 06:34 PM   #151
spacemountainmom
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Originally Posted by pkondz View Post
Great answer! Then again maybe she could tag team with the MIL who gave the s*x book and be there for both events. Can you say "mood killer"? I can just see it, "No, you're doing it wrong. See I told you you shouldn't have married her!"


Which reminds me of another fun MIL story........

DH and I started dating our senior year. The summer after we graduated DH's sister, BIL and infant niece moved in with mom and dad after BIL lost his job. They lived there for almost an entire year and my DH was miserable (That's another whole story).

They finally moved out and life in the house was getting back to normal. One day my future MIL tells me that I left my birth control in the bathroom.. Not that it really was her business, but we didn't need it at the time. IF I had needed to keep my "stuff" at their house, I would have put it in DH's bathroom, not hers. Whatever! I was completely embarrassed and so was DH.

It turned out that the "mystery" birth control belonged to dh's sister. Really? Why would you assume that I would put my stuff in your medicine cabinet??? I guess she thought I was a shameless hussy.
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Old 08-19-2011, 07:06 PM   #152
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I grew up in an ultra-religious household. So that one is funny. Just an FYI - we were not allowed to watch Disney because it was too immoral. Between my love of Disney and what your book says - I'm really gonna burn!!
OMG that reminds me.. DH was not allowed to watch several cartoons and other movies like Star Wars, etc, when he was a child (read... up to age 17 or so) because his dad said they were all demons.

MIL has also gotten women kicked out of theme parks for wearing bikinis too small for her liking. If she couldn't get them kicked out, she'd badger them until they left of their own accord.
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Old 08-19-2011, 07:09 PM   #153
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I was just embarassed she was all up in my underpants.

Where are you tag fairy?!
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Old 08-19-2011, 07:52 PM   #154
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Originally Posted by Principessa1284 View Post
OMG that reminds me.. DH was not allowed to watch several cartoons and other movies like Star Wars, etc, when he was a child (read... up to age 17 or so) because his dad said they were all demons.

MIL has also gotten women kicked out of theme parks for wearing bikinis too small for her liking. If she couldn't get them kicked out, she'd badger them until they left of their own accord.
Too funny!! So familiar. My younger brother and I can have a laugh together about those kind of things. DF still rails against going to WDW! I don't really speak to him much (I sat through enough sermons as a kid), but I still wouldn't have the heart to tell him we are saving for DVC timeshares. Two strikes - timeshares and Disney - ARRRGH - How his daughter has strayed!!.

My older brother and SIL followed right in my parents' footsteps. I was shocked when I found out my DB actually let his kids watch Harry Potter movies. He explained it away by informing me that, "That is the way real devil-worshipers behave. They do all the things in that movie."

I still can't figure out how he would know...

Ahhh, families.
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Old 08-19-2011, 08:10 PM   #155
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I am lucky to have inlaws that are nice (not to say that we always get along, we don't, but they include me and aren't like the inlaws on these pages!!!)

However I do have a very good friend who is unfortunately saddled with a nasty MIL, and up until these pages, was the worst I have heard of. Here are some of the things she did:

1) For my friend's wedding, MIL dressed in sweatpants and brought a can of coke. She sat in the front row shaking it and saying loudly "I've been to better funerals." My friend's BIL and father (who is sadly deceased now) had to be physically restrained by their spouses, because they wanted to remove her from the ceremony. Oh and MIL did have other clothes to wear to the wedding, she just chose sweatpants (dirty ones) because she wanted to make a point.

2) MIL repeatedly accused friend that their first child was not her son's and went so far as to say she saw many different men go into her home so it could be any one of them.

3) When first child was born, MIL brought a gift, but insisted on seeing baby's room first. When she looked through the closet etc she said "Your kid is already too spoiled!" and left, taking her gift with her. And no she did not give them something else.

4) MIL had one of her sons running a meth lab in her house. He was convicted and sent to jail. And she has 50+ cats in her house. And smokes. And is a hoarder. She keeps asking to babysit the kids in her house. And thinks my friend is weird for refusing.

5) She once "diagnosed" cancer in her nephew by flashing a flashlight down his throat and saying because it looked black, it was cancer. My friend's husband believed her. And no the child does not have cancer, it was a cold.
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Old 08-19-2011, 08:26 PM   #156
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Well, since we aren't married technically they aren't in-laws, but this story...

My boyfriends mom is great, a little dramatic, but she likes me. His stepdad...
They were staying at our place once. He loves cats. We have a cat. My cat does not drink milk. He kept giving the cat milk. He flipped out because I left the house at 11 at night to go get him aspirin for his head, and apparently I bought the wrong kind. What's wrong with Bayer? But these don't really amount to much, but here's my favorite....

We let them use our room, so the two of us slept on the floor in the living room on a comforter. The cat was sleeping next to me. I woke up, opened my eyes, and his stepdad was kneeling right next to me petting the cat at 3 in the morning! We were almost eye to eye!

I just closed my eyes and prayed it was a dream!
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Old 08-19-2011, 09:31 PM   #157
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OOoooooh!! I just got a card in the mail from MIL today. It's an "I-miss-the-warmth-of-your-friendship" card. Uh huh. Cards mean jack. Actions speak louder. Act like a savage and you get cut off/out. Period.

She sent a bunch of cards. That one. One for our Anniversary. One for DH for "being-such-a-great-son". One for my birthday. All dated 8/11 on the inside, but the postage stamp says they were sent yesterday. He hasn't heard from her all week (unusual). Perhaps it's finally sinking in that we're through?
If it makes you feel any better, my MIL sends me an e-card every year, to my DH's email and on my my SIL's birthday.


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Where are you tag fairy?!
Man, and that's what a sentance looks like out of context!
And I spelled embarrassed wrong. Of course.
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Old 08-20-2011, 06:21 AM   #158
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... since then our kids have been on the back burner.. my mil use to tell me "you'll understand when your kids have kids". Meaning I"ll love my girls kids but not my sons I guess.
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Originally Posted by HannaBelle View Post
MiL's loving their daughters children more than their son's children seems to be a reoccurring theme on this thread. I know it is an issue between myself and my MIL. WTH is that all about?

That was just the beginning of a lifetime of small slights, nothing like what others have posted, but my kids have still noticed.
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Maybe that's my MIL's problem??? I guess I sank my own ship that day, but I just could not believe that my MIL could be so presumtious.

I don't mind when she makes nasty comments to me and believe me she manages to work them in frequently. I don't think my FIL is nearly as bad as she is, but I do fault him for not standing up to her and doing the right thing.
WOW. I think maybe that's my MIL's issue too. Never thought about it because it's not an issue with my mother and my DD and my brother's kids??
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Old 08-20-2011, 07:52 AM   #159
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My MIL went to Macys and changed every single item on our Wedding registry.... Did not know about it till my shower when I was very confused after I started opening gifts.

The very first thing I opened was a black 2 slice toaster. It had the receipt from my gift registry from the giver so it was obvious they bought off of my registry. I had registered for a white 4 slice toaster so I was just a little confused until my MIL spoke up and said "She registered for a white 4 slice toaster. I have no idea what she was thinking with the white, it will be so hard to keep clean. Plus what newly married couple needs a 4 slice toaster?" At that point I knew what she had done.

She changed all the sheets I registered for from prints and solid light colors to solid dark colors. Changed all the white and blue towels to solid dark colors. She was afraid I would have a hard time keeping white things white.

With that color scheme change she also changed our comforter set to match the dark solid sheets sheets and changed the shower curtain to match the towels. (Mind you we had just bought a house a few weeks before the shower and we painted everything to match with what we registered for. We picked a Wedgewood blue wall color with white curtains(she changed those too) and a wedgewood and white comforter set. Wedgewood and white in the adjoining bath. She changed everything to navy and a deep forest green)

She changed the stainless steel pot set to a cheap T-fal set because she did not think I would be able to cook off of the stainless let alone maintain the stainless pans.

Changed all the baking items to cheaper versions because what did I know about baking.

Changed the nice knife set we wanted to just a set of steak knives because I don't cook anyway. (I never had my own home before this. When and where was I supposed to show off my cooking with her?)

Changed the coffee maker that dripped right into the insulated carafe because she thought I'd break it.

There was nothing she left except the cheap stuff like the cooking utensils, and potato peelers etc. She even changed the kitchen towels I wanted. They had cute green checked ones with vegetables embroidered on the ends. She changed those to navy. My kitchen had sage green counters.

We also put big ticket things on there like a TV but we made it clear we were not expecting that. We were doing it because at that time (1995) Macy's gave you a big discount after the date of your shower on any unpurchased items on your registry. We just wanted to get a discount on the TV so we could buy it ourselves. She took all those things off.

She ruined what should have been such a happy time for us. We both still lived at home at that point so we were starting with nothing. We just bought the house but were not planning on moving in till after the wedding. So we were so busy that whole time cleaning, painting, imagining what it would be like when we hung curtains and had things to put in the house... When DH picked me up from the shower to load everything to take them over to the house I burst into tears. When I told him what happened he was absolutely furious.... They got into a huge fight over it and my FIL was involved too. They were able to change the registry because FIL and DH have the same name. All he had to do was show his ID and they were walked around to modify "their" registry.
We were literaly starting with nothing so we were very grateful for everything but like everybody else we were so excited to register for things for our new home. Pick colors, choose appliances etc. She took all of that fun away from us. She made it a nightmare. We were not sure what to do. Do we exchange all those items? If we do that then what happens when Grandma comes over and wants to know where is the navy blue and gold canister set that she bought me? So do we keep everything instead and just buy new in our colors styles when we can afford to? NIGHTMARE!
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Old 08-20-2011, 08:30 AM   #160
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TheIncredibles!-

OMG!!!

I would have been sooo mad and crying too! I consider myself easy going, but I think that would be something I would NEVER be able to recover from. What is wrong with her? And for the FIL to go along with it too?!
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Old 08-20-2011, 08:34 AM   #161
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Originally Posted by TheIncredibles! View Post
I had registered for a white 4 slice toaster so I was just a little confused until my MIL spoke up and said "She registered for a white 4 slice toaster. I have no idea what she was thinking with the white, it will be so hard to keep clean. Plus what newly married couple needs a 4 slice toaster?" At that point I knew what she had done.
But then everybody else knew, right? Did anyone say anything?

Quote:
She made it a nightmare. We were not sure what to do. Do we exchange all those items? If we do that then what happens when Grandma comes over and wants to know where is the navy blue and gold canister set that she bought me? So do we keep everything instead and just buy new in our colors styles when we can afford to? NIGHTMARE!
What did you end up doing? And what kind of relationship did you have with the interfering <bad word> after that?
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Old 08-20-2011, 08:39 AM   #162
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TheIncredibles!-

OMG!!!

I would have been sooo mad and crying too! I consider myself easy going, but I think that would be something I would NEVER be able to recover from. What is wrong with her? And for the FIL to go along with it too?!
I agree. Crazy.

You had no where to go but up from there, but something tells me that didn't happen. What did you and your DH decide to do? How have things been since then? I bet you have many, many stories to tell. You have my sympathy.

Just a general question to all: How do you forge a relationship with people who are clearly looney tunes and mean spirited? So many of these stories the people do and say what they wish with no thought as to how their behavior will impact others. After doing and saying such outlandish, bizarre behavior do people really think things will just go on as they always have? That people will always look the other way? No one has any feelings but them? Mind boggling. Absolutely mind boggling. And extremely sad.
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Old 08-20-2011, 08:51 AM   #163
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MiL's loving their daughters children more than their son's children seems to be a reoccurring theme on this thread. I know it is an issue between myself and my MIL. WTH is that all about?

My MIL did not come to the hospital when either of my kids were born, but she was at the birth of all of the others. Distance was no issue...it is just bizarre. That was just the beginning of a lifetime of small slights, nothing like what others have posted, but my kids have still noticed.
I couldn't have said it better myself! It's amazing to me how much more she loves her daughter and granddaughter compared to DH and our 2 DSs. Even when SIL lived farther away than we do (for about 1 year), they still made more effort to be in contact with her and visit her than they have done in the nearly 20 years DH and I have lived here. It's their loss!

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Old 08-20-2011, 08:58 AM   #164
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TheIncredibles!-

OMG!!!

I would have been sooo mad and crying too! I consider myself easy going, but I think that would be something I would NEVER be able to recover from. What is wrong with her? And for the FIL to go along with it too?!
It was horrible. I fought so hard through the whole shower to not let it show because it was not our family's fault. KWIM? After all - all these people buying us these gifts thought they were buying things we picked out for ourselves. How could I react and take away their enjoyment of being able to provide for our first home? My sister was helping me and with every gift I opened she would mutter under her breath "Holy ****! I can't believe she did that."

Afterwards we took everything to the house and DH and I just stood there looking at it all in shock. She ruined it for us. All that joy of buying our first home and setting it up so it was ready for our first day together - all ruined. Not to mention the stress she added to an already stressful time.

We ended up having my Mother explain what happened to my whole side so they would know why things they had bought were not in the house etc. We said nothing to DH's side figuring if we had a family gathering and they asked we'd just lay out what MIL did right in front of her. Nobody asked...

We exchanged every little thing and it took us 4 separate trips to Macys to do it. I have to say Macys was absolutely incredible about the whole thing. Once they realized what had happened they really went overboard to help fix it all and help us exchange everything.

They gave us the discounts we should have gotten on the TV too.
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Old 08-20-2011, 09:09 AM   #165
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But then everybody else knew, right? Did anyone say anything?



What did you end up doing? And what kind of relationship did you have with the interfering <bad word> after that?
Yes other people knew from her comments, but there were over 50 people at my shower so only a handful caught her comments. (I have a really big family) My mom did not hear at first, she was not paying attention to her, she was chatting and laughing with her sisters etc. And after the fact I had to explain the true extent of what happened. She though MIL has only changed some things. My sister knew since she was helping me open presents and was paying attention to my MIL. DH's Aunts I am sure know since they were right there but nobody from that side ever said anything.

We are not close with DH's family at all. My MIL 15+ years later still seems to think I am incapable of the most basic wifely duties and I still think she is an interfering busy body. She is not openly hostile, she honestly believes that I don't know what I am doing as an adult, wife and mother and it's her duty to help me out.

This is not the only MIL story I could tell here. It's been 15.5 years since my wedding shower. I can assure you that things did not suddenly change after my shower.

The stories I could tell you through the years are as bad as this one, but non top this one.
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