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Old 11-27-2011, 05:15 PM   #256
PRINCESS VIJA
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day 175 time to play catch up

WOW, I have been gone a long time. Lets just say that I was gone last weekend, and then at the beginning of the week something happened that made me soooo sad, then I had Thanksgiving, and my Birthday and time just got away from me... So I will recap my days, some good choices in there, but not many...

Day 167 Deer hunting
We went to a friends cabin to go deer hunting. DD's first time! I am happy to report that she got a 4 point buck and so did DS. I was very proud of them. I don't hunt yet, but I fully support them and I was thrilled for them. Spent the time in the cabin reading, organizing photos. very productive.

day 168 busy day
Came home from Deer hunting, DH had to butcher the deer, I'm running around as we have no time and we are hosting Thanksgiving!

day 169 SAD DAY!
I will not say what occured this day, but something really bummed me out, I felt so incredibly sad, deflated, hurt, betrayed, and just angry. the sunshine just went away and not only replaced by clouds, but fog as well. I will say that it had nothing to do with my health, or my family, or DH. My immediate family are the only one's that know and that is how it will stay. I wish I could share, I think it would do me a world of good, but I just can't, and won't. I cried and cried and cried, and still almost a week later just can't get over it, don't know if I ever will.... However it did make me completely loose my appetite that day, so it was good for weight loss

day 170 at least I did something healthy today!
So my DH's work has a great healthy incentives program. For the holidays they have a "maintain, don't gain" program. DH and I both enrolled. We give in $10 and at the end we get that money back as long as we maintained our weight. anyone else that doesn't or doesn't weigh back in, then their money gets distributed to those that did maintain. Also randomly 5 people will get $55 dollars too.

day 171 Just trying to get ready for Thanksgiving
enough said Too much money spent, too much stress, had to hide stuff because I have some people coming over that "snoop"

day 172 Thanksgiving
DH and I made some great food! I did great as I only had little bits of my favorites. Very happy with how good I did. However I was very frustrated and hurt by someone. Not related to the earlier incident in the week. I think that my wounds were still fresh and raw from earlier in the week and that made what happened that much more hurtful. again, I won't say what happened. For the most part, had a great day

day 173 My BIRTHDAY!
What a great day it was! Actually did the Black Friday thing, and I was successful. Never did that before, in line by 4 for a 6am opening. But I got my cricut machine! DH and I did some more shopping, and went to an area he used to live while we were dating and it was fun to reminisce. At night DD and I went to go see the new Twilight movie... LOVED IT! a great day!

day 174. Christmas with the In-laws
Celebrated Christmas with the inlaws today. For the most part it was nice.

day 175. Planning
Today we drove around a bunch getting errands done, and I watched some biggest loser, and got some laundry done. We have been planning for sometime now how to get more time in to exercise and make some healthy changes for the family. We are planning to go exercise Mon, Wed and once on the weekends at the gym. I think it will be great that we are doing this together. I think it will keep me accountable and get things done. I've also decided that I really need to follow some sort of plan. Just eating less isn't really getting it done. I need some guidelines. What has worked in the past is to count calories, but I know to do so on a daily basis will be too much for my perfectionism. So instead I am going to set a weekly goal for calories. That way it does give me some leeway for days that I may have to much, but a plan to be able to absorb those calories if I just cut back on other days. I am excited about that.

wish me luck as I move forward with that.

I also picked up a book today "chicken soup for the soul finding happiness". Oh yes, I am usually the happiest person in the room, however last week really hit me hard, and I am struggling with it. I need to find my joy again. Don't get me wrong, there are lots of things I am thankful for, and lots that I have in my life that is good, but I know I can be happy again, and I know that It needs to start with me, I need to find my sunshine again.

Linda and Desiree, thanks for your posts, it brought me a smile!
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Old 11-27-2011, 06:38 PM   #257
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Deer hunting? Deer butchering? Oh, you are a better person than me girl - and braver too lol.

Glad to hear from you again. Sorry that you got so hurt and upset, sure understand what that feels like.

Sharing another reading from the set you gave me on my blog tonight.

I hope that you have a magical losing day and hope to see you on again soon.

Your plans sound great. Getting into a regular routine re exercise and some sort of plan re eating is half the battle but really helpful from my experience.

I feel like a slug today and I ate too much, feeling it tonight. Ugh! need to remember that for next time.

Have a great one.

Linda

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Old 11-27-2011, 06:40 PM   #258
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and Happy belated birthday too...

Linda
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Old 11-28-2011, 08:57 PM   #259
PRINCESS VIJA
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day 176 great workout at the gym!

Went to the gym tonight and had a great workout. I am glad that DH is in this with me, because then we both just know that we have to go... no excuses. food was pretty good today too. Pretty happy with these choices. I did 11 min. on the treadmill. 20 minutes on the elliptical and I was MOVING! then 30 minutes of weight lifting/crunches/ and stretching at the end.

Tomorrow my plan is to workout at home after work, before dinner and depending on weather go for a walk.

LINDA, thanks for your birthday wishes and good thoughts. So glad to see you back here, haven't had a chance to check out your blog, but I will be catching up soon.

have a great day everyone!
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June '06 First Family of Tomorrowland ~ first on Buzzlight year and 30 fastpasses received!
Oct. '07 DD woke up Tinkerbelle
Oct. '07 Won Dream Fastpasses
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Old 11-29-2011, 06:05 AM   #260
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Happy belated birthday, Vija! Sounds like you are back on track!
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Old 11-29-2011, 05:45 PM   #261
PRINCESS VIJA
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day 177 arms are a bit sore, but feeling great!

Yesterday I did weights at the gym and did a bit more than usual. The weights were just a bit heavier. My arms are sore!!! Not bad, but enough to feel good... KWIM? That makes me very happy. I am within my calories for the day and plan on doing the stairmaster tonight while watching the first part of the biggest loser. LOVE makeover week. I would love to have one of those makeovers.

I am also again thinking about the marathon. Can't decide if I want to set my sights for the Princess or the regular marathon weekend to do the 1/2. I really want to do it. any thoughts?

Desiree, thank you so much for the belated birthday wish, and you are right... I am back on track!
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Special Magical Moments!
Dec. '03 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
June '06 First Family of Tomorrowland ~ first on Buzzlight year and 30 fastpasses received!
Oct. '07 DD woke up Tinkerbelle
Oct. '07 Won Dream Fastpasses
Oct. '08 First Family at Epcot Character Meet and Greet
Oct. '08 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
Aug. '09 Magical Family ~ Opened Disneyland Park
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Old 11-29-2011, 05:58 PM   #262
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PRINCESS VIJA View Post
I am also again thinking about the marathon. Can't decide if I want to set my sights for the Princess or the regular marathon weekend to do the 1/2. I really want to do it. any thoughts?
Hi Vija! I don't post much but I do follow along and you are doing great! Very inspiring! My vote is do the 1/2 during regular marathon week-end in 2013 because I am selfish and doing that race myself. I would love to meet you in person after "following" you all these years.
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Old 12-03-2011, 08:50 PM   #263
PRINCESS VIJA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lisah0711 View Post
Hi Vija! I don't post much but I do follow along and you are doing great! Very inspiring! My vote is do the 1/2 during regular marathon week-end in 2013 because I am selfish and doing that race myself. I would love to meet you in person after "following" you all these years.
Thank you for following along! I really do appreciate it, simply more than you know!!!! I have no idea which way I want to go for the marathon, all I know is that I WANT to do it! I now have to find a way to DO it!

I have to admit that it would be fun to meet everyone at the marathon. I just don't know yet...
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Special Magical Moments!
Dec. '03 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
June '06 First Family of Tomorrowland ~ first on Buzzlight year and 30 fastpasses received!
Oct. '07 DD woke up Tinkerbelle
Oct. '07 Won Dream Fastpasses
Oct. '08 First Family at Epcot Character Meet and Greet
Oct. '08 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
Aug. '09 Magical Family ~ Opened Disneyland Park
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Old 12-03-2011, 09:04 PM   #264
PRINCESS VIJA
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Join Date: Feb 2001
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Catching up again...

I have to admit that I am not happy about having to play catch up again. I need to recommit to daily logging. Too many times at night, I am just so tired, I just can't think, just want to fall in bed, but in the end it isn't helping me if I skip days, so I am going back to commiting to daily logging.

Soooo, catching up....

Day 178 Wed. 11/30 supposed to go workout
But we didn't. Very tired after work, worked extra and then ran to get some things at the store. I was frustrated with not going to the gym.

Day 179 Thurs 12/1 Happy December!
I LOVE December and all the Christmas glory! it really does make me smile and have a smile in my heart.
I worked out for 30 min. on the treadmill and ate pretty good. At night drove to church and the kids made gingerbread cookies that they will distribute to some elderly church members. Really liked that night. The cookie smell and taste brought me right back to being a kid again.

Day 180 Fri 12/2 Shopping for DD
Went shopping for DD, I was looking at some of the clothes and how I wished I could wear some of them. I hate going to the ladies department and searching for that 1 item that actually fits on my body. Lets not even discuss if it is a color/style/material I like, that's not even an option, just praying I can find something that actually fits. I can't wait until I can actually choose what I want to wear, and have options! I am so sick and tired of always wearing sweatpants and tshirts. That is my "uniform" in winter. and it is getting old.

Day 181 Sat 12/3 EXERCISE!
Woke up early on my own and decided to go exercise. I did one of my favorites. It is just putting in my music CD's (80's music) and just doing old aerobics routines, and dancing and just having fun. I also practiced a little taeKwonDo. Later in the morning DH and I went to the gym. I did a little on the treadmilll and then did the weight machine circuit. It felt great.

A little sad today as I also did bills and I am tired of trying to stretch the money. Ughhh, money stress is not good. I have to admit that I did munch a little today because of the stress. I did stop it, and reign it in when I made myself aware of what I was doing, so that actually is a step in the right direction. In the past I would just have eaten without an awareness, but I am learning to pay attention to my triggers.

Also decided to sign up for the December exercise challenge on WISH. I am shooting for 1000 minutes. I haven't completed a challenge on WISH like that. I have tried several times but gave up... not this time! I have to be accountable to that so ladies PLEASE ask me how it is going! I need your help on that. So far I am at 125/1000
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Special Magical Moments!
Dec. '03 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
June '06 First Family of Tomorrowland ~ first on Buzzlight year and 30 fastpasses received!
Oct. '07 DD woke up Tinkerbelle
Oct. '07 Won Dream Fastpasses
Oct. '08 First Family at Epcot Character Meet and Greet
Oct. '08 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
Aug. '09 Magical Family ~ Opened Disneyland Park
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Old 12-04-2011, 09:06 PM   #265
PRINCESS VIJA
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DAy 182. SO many titles for today...

Here are my multiple titles for today...

1. Why does it always come in Three's?
2. Eagle Scout Ceremonies are amazing
3. WHY didn't I just stop, drop and roll... or at least stop, drop the chips and wait for 10 minutes????

1. Why does it always come in Three's?
When I first started my journal I was motivated by three things. Well, last night to this morning I had 3 things that made me "see" how big I really am. 1. I decided to pamper myself a little yesterday. I hadn't taken a bath in probably 2 years (shower yes, not bath). I used to love bubble baths, so I decided to take one, I felt great about myself for exercising and eating right so why not pamper myself.... right? My first clue that this wasn't going to be a good idea was that I didn't have any bubble bath items. So I am filling the bathtub with water and I am having a hard time getting into the tub. As soon as I sat down, I felt like I "filled" the tub, it was a very tight fit and almost felt like I was a cork. Not really too comfy, then I am starting to worry about how the heck I was going to get out. Really not fun. I wanted to pamper myself but ended up just feeling pretty bad. 2 THEN I started to try on clothes last night for an event for today. UGHHHH, I was so disgusted. TMI coming your way... but my tummy is now hanging down... It has been big for a long time, but NOT hanging down like that. I could tell my body shape had shifted, but I truly did not realize to the extent. Those clothes that used to look perfectly fine, look hideous on me. I really am not exagerating. Just being honest, which is hard to admit to that. I just wanted to cry. 3. and then yes, today i cried. I was watching a few minutes of the blind side just before going to exercise, and I just admired Sandra Bullock's figure. So beautiful, I just felt so ugly and hideous. Like I said it came in three's and I was upset. Good thing was that I went to work out instead of just throwing in the towel.



2. Eagle Scout Ceremonies are amazing
Went to an Eagle Scout Ceremony today. We had the priviledge and honor to help this Eagle Scout with his project. I wrote about it on day 36 here in this journal. Part of the ceremony talked about the challenges he faced, he was diagnosed with a chronic illness and about how he faced the challenges with courage and determination. During his speech he broke down, and cried. I don't think there was a dry eye there. I certainly was crying. Eagle Scout ceremonies are amazing, these young men work so hard, it is a journey that is amazing, and it is a priviledge to witness the Eagle Scout Court of Honor. I was really looking forward to this one. If you ever have the chance to go to one, please go... It is a wonderful experience. DS is working on his Eagle Scout project right now. I look forward to the day that he can have his ceremony. Then I start to get all emotional considering my past health history and THANK GOD that I am still here to experience these milestones with my kids.


3. WHY didn't I just stop, drop and roll... or at least stop, drop the chips and wait for 10 minutes????
Tonight we then came home and watched Amazing Race. I got caught up on the race, was hungry and mindlessly ate too many chips. Finished the container. Ughhh, I am SOOO angry with myself!WHY didn't I just wait a few minutes and then head upstairs??? WHAT was I thinking?




I know I have been doing better and better, and I am learning alot about myself, but what is it going to take to put it all together????
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Special Magical Moments!
Dec. '03 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
June '06 First Family of Tomorrowland ~ first on Buzzlight year and 30 fastpasses received!
Oct. '07 DD woke up Tinkerbelle
Oct. '07 Won Dream Fastpasses
Oct. '08 First Family at Epcot Character Meet and Greet
Oct. '08 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
Aug. '09 Magical Family ~ Opened Disneyland Park

Last edited by PRINCESS VIJA; 12-04-2011 at 09:14 PM.
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Old 12-05-2011, 07:11 PM   #266
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Yesterday's gone Vija.

We can drive ourselves crazy with the would haves, should haves, why didn't I's.

Your intentions were good, you can't be a duck until you learn to quack and you can't play hockey til you learn to skate.

You can't swim til you test the waters.

Sometimes you try to get in too deep. That too will pass.

Tell me about today and don't worry about what you will do tomorrow. As a lawyer friend of mine says - that's tomorrow's problem.

Sorry I am not around more lately, still having a bit of a battle. But battles and trials are but for a season - that is a Biblical promise.

I am holding onto it.

Take care and have a magical day.

Linda

BTW - you know which half marathon I want you to do - if you have time drop by my blog today for more news on my efforts.

If not, look forward to your next post.

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Old 12-05-2011, 09:41 PM   #267
PRINCESS VIJA
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Thanks Linda, you are so right. I have had a problem of always looking back or dreaming of the future. I often miss being in the moment. I am getting better at that. And it doesn't always happen. I will keep focusing on my daily accomplishments and go from there.

and by the way.... lots of hugs to you! I did post on your journal too. But sending lots more hugs your way here too!
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Special Magical Moments!
Dec. '03 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
June '06 First Family of Tomorrowland ~ first on Buzzlight year and 30 fastpasses received!
Oct. '07 DD woke up Tinkerbelle
Oct. '07 Won Dream Fastpasses
Oct. '08 First Family at Epcot Character Meet and Greet
Oct. '08 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
Aug. '09 Magical Family ~ Opened Disneyland Park
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Old 12-05-2011, 09:58 PM   #268
PRINCESS VIJA
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WISH Biggest Loser/BL I
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Future teacher, destined to touch young hearts and minds
Aced her PPSTs
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 7,355

Day 183. A momentous day! 1/2 a year!

Can it really be??? 183 days????? How fast does a half a year go by???? REALLY FAST! That makes me realize how fast the second half is going to go by. I've been learning alot about myself during this time. It has been an amazing journey of self discovery. I thank you all for coming along on this journey. It hasn't been perfect, it has had a few bumps in the road, and I have had amazing days too.

Here are a few things I have learned:

1. When I put my mind to something I can accomplish it.
(I've tried to get a journal going here many times, but haven't been commited, not sure what changed this time but I've kept up with it, and it has been a friend to me, AND you have all been a great support!)
2. I need partners in crime to help me on the journey.
(DH is AWESOME! and I have needed him to join me in this journey. the accountability and support he gives me is what I need to be successful. He also has some fitness goals and I find myself wanting to do things to support him as well, works great when we are working it together)
3. I LOVE you guys!
(I can't tell you how much it means to me to read your comments along the way, the support, encouragement and "kicks in the pants" really mean alot to me)
4. When I work the plan, the plan works
(I need to be just as commited to my own plan as I am to this journal. It will work for me, I just need to keep it going)
5. Time really does fly by fast
(Enjoy each day, find the joy in each day whatever it might be. I just started reading "find your happiness" from Chicken soup for your soul, and it is true, there is joy and happiness everywhere, we just have to look for it.
6. Exercise just feels good
(I am noticing how much better I feel when I exercise... it just isn't to loose weight, but just to feel better!!!)


So for the next 183 days...
1. continue writing in this journal
2. Keep up with the exercise (love that I am in the December exercise challenge, I like the idea of reaching for that goal, keeps me wanting to do just a bit more each day to reach 1000 minutes exercised this month
3. keep counting calories. Try to stay within the calorie range on a daily basis
4. keep your hands and mind busy with projects so they don't stray to the food cupboards.
5. GO BACK TO TAEKWONDO In january I do plan on going back, I am going to make earning my black belt a new years resolution. It is time to complete that mission.
6. Keep supporting DH in his journey
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Special Magical Moments!
Dec. '03 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
June '06 First Family of Tomorrowland ~ first on Buzzlight year and 30 fastpasses received!
Oct. '07 DD woke up Tinkerbelle
Oct. '07 Won Dream Fastpasses
Oct. '08 First Family at Epcot Character Meet and Greet
Oct. '08 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
Aug. '09 Magical Family ~ Opened Disneyland Park
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Old 12-06-2011, 10:09 PM   #269
PRINCESS VIJA
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Aced her PPSTs
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 7,355

day 184. watching the biggest Loser and dreaming and crying

tonight I was sitting on the couch watching tv with DD. Providence stepped in because I was going to start baking cookies with her, but we didn't have all of the supplies. Instead we watched a bit of the Christmas Carol and then came the Biggest Loser. I was going to settle in and watch it on the couch but at the last minute, just as it is starting I decided to get up off the couch and go exercise!!!! I really was thinking that I enjoy the way I feel after I exercise... so just get up and do it!

Did 45 minutes on the stairmaster and then I started to work on my push up position for Tae Kwon Do. Feeling very proud of myself for getting up and getting moving!

Meanwhile the Biggest Loser is onto the marathon. As the contestants are finishing and some are getting pulled, tears are just rolling down my face. I feel SOOOO bad for the contestants that were pulled, especially Joe, he just wanted to finish, only 5 miles away... I cried for his lost dream. As the contestants finished I cried for their accomplishments and the inspiration that they are placing in my heart.

Definitely dreaming of when I do the 1/2 marathon. That right now is my goal and my focus.

I don't remember if I started a bucket list on this journal but I am going to start one now...

1. EARN MY BLACKBELT!!! It is time to complete what I started years ago.

2. Complete a Disneyworld half marathon. something I have dreamed of for years, now it is time to put into action

3. Complete a Disneyland half marathon (I want the coast to coast medal!)

4. Loose 1/2 my body weight!
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Special Magical Moments!
Dec. '03 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
June '06 First Family of Tomorrowland ~ first on Buzzlight year and 30 fastpasses received!
Oct. '07 DD woke up Tinkerbelle
Oct. '07 Won Dream Fastpasses
Oct. '08 First Family at Epcot Character Meet and Greet
Oct. '08 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
Aug. '09 Magical Family ~ Opened Disneyland Park
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Old 12-07-2011, 09:30 PM   #270
PRINCESS VIJA
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Aced her PPSTs
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 7,355

day 185 what a relaxing day!!!

I had a vacation day from work today. I got a lot done and had a great day. I did Jane Fonda's step aerobic tape from a long time ago. It really kicked my but today! BUT, last time I tried it I couldn't do all the stepping up and down, so I am proud of myself for doing it all the way through. What a blast from the past for me.

I worked on cleaning, laundry, getting started for DS's scout scrapbook album, watched alot of stuff I DVR'd, read a little, went shopping, and had a great day. Then DH and I went to the gym and I did the weights. I just love how I feel!

AND I get the pleasure of changing my clippie again... finally! I could have changed it sooner, but I was bouncing around a 2pound variance that I wanted to wait until I knew for sure I was passed the 10# mark. I am actually down 12#!!!!
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Special Magical Moments!
Dec. '03 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
June '06 First Family of Tomorrowland ~ first on Buzzlight year and 30 fastpasses received!
Oct. '07 DD woke up Tinkerbelle
Oct. '07 Won Dream Fastpasses
Oct. '08 First Family at Epcot Character Meet and Greet
Oct. '08 Magical Family ~ Opened MK
Aug. '09 Magical Family ~ Opened Disneyland Park
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