Disney Information Station Logo

Go Back   The DIS Discussion Forums - DISboards.com > Disney Trip Planning Forums > disABILITIES!
Find Hotel Specials & DIScounts
 
facebooktwitterpinterestgoogle plusyoutubeDIS UpdatesDIS email updates
Register Chat FAQ Tickers Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read





Reply
 
Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 05-12-2011, 06:02 PM   #16
teekathepony
DIS Veteran
 
teekathepony's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Cape Breton, NS
Posts: 4,375

I'm not proud of it, but when I was younger I used to be that rude person who didn't understand anyone with anything different. I got it from my dad, who is still like that. It wouldn't be beyond me once upon a time to stare rudely at such situations, thinking automatically "bad parenting" or something like that. I think back and am totally ashamed of myself. Gradually I saw my father and how he was making people feel and started to berate him for his actions. I then realized that if I was calling him down, I'd better walk the walk. I also got a new job and my boss has a son with downs syndrome. I got to know him and that he's a great kid. A regular customer had a son with autism. As I learned more about these things, I like to think I did a 180 in my way of thinking.

My point... yes... I did get off track.

From the opposite point of view... from someone who has been "that rude person" (though I never made a comment, my glares were certainly not appreciated I'm sure)... I can tell you that education works. I can't at all defend those types of actions, only tell you that for me they came from a place of not knowing. I now assume the best about everyone. It was hard for me to turn my thinking around by myself. I hear that education is a lot better now. I hope to someday see a world without people like I used to be.
I sincerely hope you have a fantastic trip and nothing/no one bothers you.
teekathepony is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-13-2011, 08:17 AM   #17
blondietink
DIS Veteran
 
blondietink's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Western New York State
Posts: 1,732

Unfortunately, you will probably get some rude comments while at Disney. There are rude people everywhere and when they are paying the big bucks for a trip to WDW, they seem to feel entitled to say/do whatever they want. The comments seem to be more frequent when it is hot and crowded at WDW.

That being siad, during our last visit in April, we did not have one nasty comment from anybody! I didn't see anybody staring at us either.
__________________
Barb
blondietink is offline   Reply With Quote
|
The DIS
Register to remove

Join Date: 1997
Location: Orlando, FL
Posts: 1,000,000
Old 05-14-2011, 09:06 PM   #18
yorkiegirl95
Earning My Ears
 
yorkiegirl95's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 23

Quote:
Originally Posted by Becc1 View Post
First I'll give a little background. I have an 8 yr old DS who has mild Cerebral Palsy. He just learned to walk on his own without a walker about 3 years ago. He is still pretty unstable at times (especially at the end of the day when he's tired) but on an everyday basis he walks everywhere, the only time I use a stroller (which is a special needs one) is if we are at the zoo or musuems and of course Disney. Yesterday at his school they did a Healthwalk where the kids did laps around the parking lot to raise money for the school. Ben did 6 laps around, that is huge for him! He was definately worn out from the walking but my older DS had a baseball game last night and while the game went on my younger children played on the playground. My DS fell on the playground and hurt his foot, it swelled up a bit so I took him home right away (DH and I had drove seperately) I gave him some medicine for the pain and iced his foot until bedtime. This morning he says it doesn't hurt but he's walking a little more unsteady than usual so when we went into Modells today to get my older DS something for baseball I brought the sit and stand stroller and haad him sit in it with my DD. An employee came up and started teasing DS about being in the stroller, I quickly chimed in and explained my DS's issues and the reason he was riding. The guys felt aweful and apologized profusely, he actually ended up giving my DS a football because he felt so bad. I really wasn't angry but now this has me thinking about our upcoming trip and wondering how many comments we may get. From the outside my DS looks perfectly "normal", it's not until he gets up to walk or speaks that you can tell he has a disability, so I am afraid people will say something. If anyone has ever been in a smilar situation what do you say? I know some parents with austitic children have gotten cards made and will hand those out but I know DH would never go for that, he will probably want to tell off the rude offender. TIA for any advice!

Lisa
I am a teen girl in a wheelchair when i go to disney. When you see me, I look COmpletely normal. Alot of people stair at me and sometimes people dont believe that i really need it. I once even had a lady try and put her son between my legs while seeing a disney parade. The best that you can do is maybe have him in a wheelchair, people tend to stair, but they make less rude comments. An maybe it wont look at weird as if he was in a stroler. Plus you might get front line passes
__________________
MAKE-A-WISH just granted my wish to got to Disney at CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!
yorkiegirl95 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-15-2011, 10:17 AM   #19
jademozingo
Earning My Ears
 
jademozingo's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Cedntral Kentucky
Posts: 9

My family went last spring and is planning another trip this coming fall. We had several speacial needs situations when we went last year.

First was my obviously elderly grandmother who simply can't be on her feet for long periods of time.

The second, third, fourth, and fifth are much less obvious.

One of these is my father, who is a veteran with Gulf War Syndrome. As few people know the specifics of such things as autism, fewer even know of this syndrome. Long waits in heat could seriously effect him, among a long list of other things. Other than looking like an overweight guy, he looks no different than an average person.

Another is my son, whose left leg twists in up in his thigh. Nothing anyone can do, and at first glance looks and walks normally. Watch him for five minutes and you'll see him concentrating on not tripping over his own feet and stumbling many times. Pretty good concentration with ADHD added in. He walks 90%, but we keep a stroller on hand for when he simply can't do it anymore. We DO NOT get passes or anything for him because he doesn't NEED the stroller all the time. However I don't doubt when he is too big for the strollers that we may have to rent a manual wheel chair to help him when he wears out (still probably won't use it for "wheelchair" access, more like a stroller situation)

My mother also walks normally MOST of the time, but last time my grandmother was in a manual chair (not doing that again!) and her ankle that flares up from time to time decided to flare up because she was pushing my grandmother's chair. She ended up in a chair herself for the next two days of the trip.

Lastly was my youngest nephew (who at four months was the most excited I ever saw anyone over meeting the mouse!). He had severe acid reflux, and his esophagus top flap (sorry I don't know the medical term for it!) wasn't fully developed. Meaning he puked all the time, everywhere, on everything. With him we had to make special arrangements with dining to be allowed to bring his stroller inside of restaurants because moving him after he had his bottle was just a nasty experience all around. Thankfully THAT is over and we won't have to deal with it this trip.

I assume the best out of people. Someone saying "they don't allow strollers in the line" may be trying to be helpful... not rude. Reply nicely and maybe make some "line friends" instead of uncomfortable silence for the duration of the wait. We made some nice park friends when someone told us this entering The Plaza with the stroller. We found out we were at the same resort (Riverside) and spent the rest of the trip running into each other and giving each other tips on rides, attractions, and restaurants.

Angie
jademozingo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-17-2011, 11:07 AM   #20
ashleypmo
DIS Veteran
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Horse Country, USA
Posts: 626

Quote:
Originally Posted by jademozingo View Post

I assume the best out of people. Someone saying "they don't allow strollers in the line" may be trying to be helpful... not rude. Reply nicely and maybe make some "line friends" instead of uncomfortable silence for the duration of the wait. We made some nice park friends when someone told us this entering The Plaza with the stroller. We found out we were at the same resort (Riverside) and spent the rest of the trip running into each other and giving each other tips on rides, attractions, and restaurants.

Angie
__________________
Ashley
Check out my pre-trippie: And THAT'S when I threw up on my grandmother!http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1617655
[/SIZE]



Here am I and the children whom the LORD has given me! We are for signs and for wonders....Isaiah 8:18
DH Me DD16 DS12 DD8 DSDs6 DDDs 5
ashleypmo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-20-2011, 11:12 AM   #21
DarraK
Earning My Ears
 
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 6

Quote:
Originally Posted by mickey&minniealways View Post
Both my Oldest DS and my DD have different issues. DD's are more severe. To look at either of them though you would find nothing wrong. DD's best friend is Asperbergers, her twin brother has high functioning autism. He has a wonderful t-shirt his grandpa got him. It states: " I know why I am being rude, I am autistic. What's your excuse?" . It has stopped many people mid comment.
Love it! I'm sending your quote to my neighbor who always has issues with people commenting about her autistic son.
DarraK is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-23-2011, 12:17 AM   #22
ratlenhum
DIS Veteran
 
ratlenhum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,467

I'm bad and very intolerant. It's come from years of stares and comments. If someone is staring at my child with "that look" you must know the one I mean, I stare back until I make eye contact with the offender and when I do I open my eyes real wide and make a face. If they say anything I say "what are you staring at?" One guy was so bad, and we ran into him 3 or 4 times I finally suggested he see a doctor for that problem. He said "what problem?" I said "your eyeballs are stuck."

If I overhear "isn't he a little old to be in a stroller?" I counter with "aren't you a little too rude and ignorant to be out in public?"

It all comes with the tone of it too, and the way they stare. My son is really cute (aren't they all) and some times people do look and stare because a cute kid is doing something cute. No problem there. it's the stare that come with the look like my kid has 3 heads that irks me.
ratlenhum is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-23-2011, 10:02 AM   #23
clanmcculloch
DIS Veteran
 
clanmcculloch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 5,570

I do want to share something for people to consider. Not all people who stare are trying to be rude or are thinking negative thoughts. My DD13 has Asperger Syndrome. She seems very "normal" most times. She speaks like a little adult; she's very well spoken. She does tend to stare at anything she sees that is unfamiliar. She's not trying to be rude and is in no way critical; she's interested. She may even walk up to you to talk to you because she's enthralled by people who are different. Whether the differences are physical or emotional, she sees differences as making you a kindred spirit of sorts.

Here's an example. We were at DHS one day and we were escaping a mob near the hat. We were walking slowly in the direction of Star Tours, just passing Sounds Dangerous. She saw a CM who was in a powerchair, clearly needed because the CM had no legs. The CM was right near us, going the same direction. DD13 was staring at the CM, very obviously. The CM smiled at her rather than getting upset. DD13 took that as an invitation to talk to her. Her first question? How do you apply to work at WDW? No, she didn't ask about her disability. She had been staring but I think in her mind the disability just made her more approachable. She was staring I guess because she found her interesting and different which to her is a good thing, a comforting thing. They had a nice long conversation, some of which did discuss the powerchair and working as a CM for WDW with a disability (DD13 at the time was very interested in the college program and possibly working for WDW some day). The conversation basically only ended because they had to clear the area in preparation for the parade. I really didn't want to keep the CM from her job but she seemed just as pleased with DD13 as DD13 was with her. She was a wonderful young woman and I'm glad we had the opportunity to get to know her a bit and spend a bit of time with her.

Had the CM not smiled to DD13, DD13 likely wouldn't have talked to her and may have just appeared to be some rude kid staring.
__________________
Me DH DD(16) DD(14) DSD(32) DSSil (41) DGD (newborn) DSD(30) DGS(4)




Multi-Allergy & Autism Dining Reviews: February 2014 * DL & LA July 2013 * February 2013 * August 2012 * February 2012 * August 2011 * August 2010


February 2014 AKL: me, DH, DD15, DD13 * July 2013 DL offsite (Tropicana): me, DH, DD15, DD12, DSD30, DSSil * February 2013 WDW Poly: me, DH, DD14, DD12
August 2012 WDW FW Cabin & AoA Nemo: me, DH, DD14, DD12, DD12's BFF11 * February 2012 WDW Poly CL: me, DH, DD14, DD11 * August 2011 WDW YC: me, DH, DD13, DD11
February 2011 WDW Poly CL: me, DH, DD13, DD10, DSD28, DSSil * August 2010 WDW POFQ & Poly CL: me, DH, DD12, DD10 * June 2010 WDW Pop: me, DH, DD12, DD9
December 2009 WDW POFQ: me, DH, DD11, DD9 * February 2009 WDW Pop: me, DH, DD11, DD8 * August 2008 WDW SSR: me, DH, DSD25, DSD24, DD10, DD8
September 2007 WDW Pop: me, DH, DD9, DD7 * April 2002 DLR offsite: me, DH, DSD19, DSD17, DD4, DD1.5 * June 2000 DLR offsite: me(pregnant), DH, DSD17, DSD15, DD2
January 1994 WDW offsite: me, DH, DSD11, DSD9 * January 1992 WDW offsite: me, DH, DSD9, DSD7
clanmcculloch is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-23-2011, 10:16 AM   #24
ratlenhum
DIS Veteran
 
ratlenhum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,467

About what I posted above:

Kids are going to stare, to a certain age, they don't know any better. If the parent sees the child staring, said parent should tell their child it's not nice to stare, not join them in the stare with the "***?" look on their face.

Older kids should know better, but there are exceptions. We had a kid at a water park staring at my son, making faces at him, tapping his buddy on the shoulder and point my son out, then they both stared. The mother was just ahead of these 2 boys on the line we were on. They were about 12. Finally I said "Didn't your mother ever teach you that it's not nice to stare?" The kid said "no" and the mother at this point was looking at me. I looked at her and said "well she should." The mother moved the two boys ahead of her online and told them to stop staring and if they turned around again they were getting off the line. Lesson learned for all three I think
ratlenhum is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2011, 08:36 AM   #25
buzz for boys
Certified Serious Stitch Stalker
 
buzz for boys's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: midlands UK
Posts: 2,484

I completly understand the questio as for very differet reasons to yourself this worried me A Lot before our last trip to Disney however I feel compelled to tell you we had no issues at all. O a daily basis at home we have to dodge questions or remarks bt whilst at wdw we didt have to answer one.
It felt like everyone was in their own little Disney bubble and didt notice or want to intrude into our little bubble.
In fact its another thig on our list of why we sped thousads of pounds to go to the same place on holiday every year!!!

Hope that helps a little xxx
__________________
Our trip report march 2009 here
3 weeks Nov/Dec 2010 Here

buzz for boys is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2011, 06:53 PM   #26
jemiaule
I was a plant toting, pregnant woman traveling with weiner-dawgs
my 1000th post was about plumbers butt
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 1,213

DS9 often gets stares when we use a GAC. He looks like any other 9 year old but there are some attractions where we need to wait separately away from the crowds. The noise, the accidental bumping and the general closeness of some lines he just cannot handle. A thin winding queue he does great - a big open queue is where it gets tough. Some times we have to give up on Haunted Mansion because the throng exiting the elevator is just too much for him to bear.

Anyway, back to people staring. Our method has become kill 'em with kindness. I used to get upset, angry and (I admit) sometimes confrontational with the rude people. Now my method is to look them back in the eye, smile and say in the nicest tone "hi, may I help you with something? I noticed you looking over". Most of the time people say "oh, no thanks" and I reply "oh I am sorry, I must have been mistaken".

Embarrassed people tend not to continue staring.
jemiaule is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2011, 06:55 PM   #27
ratlenhum
DIS Veteran
 
ratlenhum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,467

Quote:
Originally Posted by jemiaule View Post
Anyway, back to people staring. Our method has become kill 'em with kindness. I used to get upset, angry and (I admit) sometimes confrontational with the rude people. Now my method is to look them back in the eye, smile and say in the nicest tone "hi, may I help you with something? I noticed you looking over". Most of the time people say "oh, no thanks" and I reply "oh I am sorry, I must have been mistaken".

Embarrassed people tend not to continue staring.


Thanks for sharing this. I'm going to try this next trip. Maybe then I'll be less aggravated during the trip
ratlenhum is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-25-2011, 12:08 AM   #28
videogal1
Boogie Queen
Remember to pack the can opener
 
videogal1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Texas
Posts: 3,110

I used to wear a T shirt that stated in bold letters " I may not be perfect but parts of me are excellent" That was 30 years ago, though. It may have become a cliche' by now...
__________________
Lynda (often critical of Trolls and other frauds), Service Dog, Cash (R.I.P. 4/2013) Heidi, the princess, (5 yrs. old) and Luke (9 tears old), who is back from a 3-year retirement.
Premier Dis cruises July, Sept. '90, Disney village
Freewheelin' AKL Safari and cruise May '04
Inaugural 10-day Holiday Magic December '04
Inaugural Westward Repositioning cruise May '05
Service Dog Training cruise (HAL) November '04
BWI, BC, AKL, POP, POR, Poly, Sequoia (DLP) between '93 and 2003.
videogal1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-25-2011, 02:48 PM   #29
Disfan20
Mouseketeer
 
Disfan20's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 105

I just got back from an 8 day trip with my family that includes my DD10 with severe Autism. If any family was going to get rude comments it was ours. My daughter was "out of sorts" to say the least. She would be fine one minute then crying, screaming or being grabby the next. We tried to work through it the first couple days, but ended up cutting some meals short or skipping them all together if she was acting out too bad. We also had to remove her from some rides due to the amount of noise she was making. I can tell you that not one person made a rude comment, not one, but boy did we get the stares. Some were curious, some were sympethetic and some were downright angry that my DD was interupting their good time.

At some point early on my DD decided she did not want to walk, nothing we did could have made her walk a ster farther, so after much debate we decided to get her a Disney stroller for the remainder of the trip. The amount of stares we got was almost unbearable. It was as if every person we passed was staring. The attitude I took was that I am here to have a good time and this is what I need to do to have a good time so stare away. I am never going to see you people again and I don't care if you disapprove of a 10 year old in a stroller. Walk a mile in my shoes before you judge me and my situation. I know it is easier said than done, but in my opinion I would just let it roll off your back.
Disfan20 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-26-2011, 08:41 AM   #30
Tonka's Skipper
DIS Veteran
 
Tonka's Skipper's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Connecticut in the Good Ole USA
Posts: 4,599

Folks, some folks are going to be rude..you cannot stop them and it only hurts your vacation to let them bother you.


As Ron White says......*YOU CAN'T FIX STUPID* and those rude people are stupid

Wishing you all a next great Disney vacation!

AKK
Tonka's Skipper is online now   Reply With Quote
Reply



Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

facebooktwitterpinterestgoogle plusyoutubeDIS Updates
GET OUR DIS UPDATES DELIVERED BY EMAIL



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:56 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.

Copyright © 1997-2014, Werner Technologies, LLC. All Rights Reserved.