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Old 03-27-2010, 04:07 PM   #286
Suellen
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Originally Posted by Zeebs View Post
I am glad you can watch your children 100% of the time, and clearly nothing has ever happened to them no bumps, cuts, trips to hospital, etc. Excellent. What a great parent you are. I suppose you are able to enforce discipline as well without yelling, smacking, and all the other stuff that all the "good" parents can do.
I don't need to watch my 100% of the time ~ because a lot of the time we are at home ~ where they don't need that kind of supervision. But while we are out in a large crowded place. You bet I am watching them or holding a hand or carrying them or DH is holding a hand or carrying

And there are bumps, bruises and cuts. Because I allow them to be children and LEARN what is okay and what isn't. Granted I wouldn't give them a pair of scissors to run with or anything. Letting them explore and learn boundaries at HOME is what makes it easier when away from home.

I do enforce discipline without yelling, smacking or any the "other stuff" that is insinuated. It is called gentle discipline and I will tell you what ~ it is 100 times harder than smacking a kid and moving on with life. In the end though they learn how to deal with situations on their own and make good choices.

So, yeah, some of it has to do with HOW you bring them up. My children know that running away in a large crowd is a bad choice. They wouldn't do it. You can teach your children to respect you without hitting.

In the end though it is no one else's responsibility to parent your child but you ~ so you should make your own choices in how you parent and practice consistency ~ and who REALLY cares what other people think?

Do you care if people think you are leashing your kid so you can pay more attention to things around you than your kid? I would hope not.
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:09 PM   #287
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I hope you ok'd this with your sister.

Yeah the you leash your dog why not your kid doesn't work for me either. It is exactly BECAUSE I leash my dog that I wouldn't leash my child. They simply remind me of an item for an animal and my children are not animals (most of the times).

Also there is very little chance my children will run off and bite someone ~ while the possibility that my dog might is only slightly hirer ~ they won't make me put my kid down if she HAPPENS to (not that I think my child or my goldendoodle would ever bite someone).

And yes I do allow my child to play in the unfenced backyard by herself ~ because I watch her. I don't have to stay out there every second because she knows her limits.

We rarely ever strapped the stroller straps because my DD1 didn't need it. DD2 hated it.



They only "strapping" we do of our children is in the carseat ~ and IMHO that is the same as a seatlbelt which I wear myself.

I don't do anything to my children I would want done to myself.

AGAIN JMHO! Everyone has one. I don't judge you if you put a leash on your kid. But lots of reasons people have given don't hold with me either. Of course if I see you I don't know your reason so I don't judge.

Do what YOU are comfortable doing.
My sister wanted me to use it for her oldest child! I never felt like she needed it-she listens well and stays close. I doubt she would care if I used it on the younger one. I bet she would want it on her.

I never said I was going to use it. I said I will if I need to. My job is to keep her safe. If she won't stay near me and stop running off, then I will use it. Like I said before, she listens better to me than her mom and so I don't think I will have to use it.
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:11 PM   #288
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I am not a parent and don't plan on being one for some time. When we went to Disney I was 13 months and 3 years, and I was in the stroller both times, I believe. I know my mom had a wrist-to-wrist for me that she used at the mall. I don't have "nursemaid's elbow" and the wrist-to-wrist hadn't caused me any injury that I know of. Now my younger brother is a different story. He is mentally retarded and on the autism spectrum and has the cognitive abilities of approximately a 5 year old. He is 15 now and to this day is a runner. He is 1 on 1 at all times. He has no sense of fear AT ALL. There are times when he absolutely doesn't want to hold your hand and he is very, very strong. He had a safety harness when he was little. It kept him from running off and it gave my mom peace of mind. For the record, my mom is a great parent and I respect her immensely. How many 18 year olds do you hear say that?
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:13 PM   #289
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Originally Posted by Suellen View Post
Do you care if people think you are leashing your kid so you can pay more attention to things around you than your kid? I would hope not.
Glad you added 'think' here. I really would however have a problem with someone saying that I am paying more attention to things around me than my child.
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:18 PM   #290
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Glad you added 'think' here. I really would however have a problem with someone saying that I am paying more attention to things around me than my child.
I was referring to a bunch of post were people say that parents leash their kids because the parents are "inattentive" and "always" see the parents who have leashes not paying attention to the kid.

Like I have said. I could care if YOU (general you here) leash YOUR child.
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:19 PM   #291
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Originally Posted by Suellen View Post
I was referring to a bunch of post were people say that parents leash their kids because the parents are "inattentive" and "always" see the parents who have leashes not paying attention to the kid.

Like I have said. I could care if YOU (general you here) leash YOUR child.
I put the harness (I refuse to call it a leash) on our daughter very rarely. If anything, it works as a deterrent as we say to her 'if you walk nicely, we won't put the harness on', however as she's getting older, its less and less a requirement.

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Old 03-27-2010, 04:23 PM   #292
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I think it is horrible to put a child on a leash, I have 2 kids and if they run off or wander away its my fault for not watching, if they are a runner or wanderer that is because I raised them that way and let them get away with it. I know I will get thats kids being kids or you cant watch them every second of the day and other flames but if my child ran/wandered or was uncontrollable that I had to put a device that is used on an animal on them to control and watch them I would look in the mirror.
I am ashamed to admit that I was once a naive, judgemental parent about issues like this. My 2 oldest were so independent, and I would look at the clingy little ones at playgroups and parties, and assume their parents must be the type that hover. Then I gave birth to the clingiest child on earth - could leave her alone in a room! I never had a problem with having kids run away, and not listen. Then I gave birth to #5, and realized that many of those parents with out of control toddlers/preschoolers were probably doing the best they could.

I look in the mirror a see a pretty good mom, who does her best, and has some pretty great kids. The clinger is now a performer, and the runner is an amazing athelete, and fastest kid in his whole grade (with some lingering self control issues ).
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:29 PM   #293
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I'm am a bit shocked to see the people who are advocating hitting a child over a harness backpack, which is basically a stroller without wheels. Great job, hitting a child and teaching them that violence is the answer.

I used to judge the leashes too, but then, I knew plenty of stuff before I became a parent. We had a harness backpack for my daughter, who was lightening quick and neither liked the stroller nor constantly having her hands held. We didn't use it that often, and only in places like the airport when we could logically be distracted for a little while by something like, say, ticket agents or airport security. It's a tool like any other. We'd use one on our 2 year old son at WDW this May if he could walk.
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:32 PM   #294
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mentally retarded
did you really use that word???
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:35 PM   #295
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did you really use that word???
...kinda thought that myself.
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:41 PM   #296
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Quote:
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did you really use that word???
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cosmo.Kramer View Post
...kinda thought that myself.
Are you kidding me? That's the medical term for it. https://health.google.com/health/ref/Mental+retardation That was not even the point of my post.
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:44 PM   #297
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Are you kidding me? That's the medical term for it. That was not even the point of my post.
Sorry, just different cultures/expressions from what I'm used to. No offense meant.
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:44 PM   #298
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Are you kidding me? That's the medical term for it. That was not even the point of my post.
Call it whatever you want. It is offensive to many, many, many people.
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:58 PM   #299
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Sorry, just different cultures/expressions from what I'm used to. No offense meant.
It's okay. Just out of curiosity, what is it referred to in Scotland? I'm not trying to be facetious, I'm honestly just curious.

Quote:
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Call it whatever you want. It is offensive to many, many, many people.
I find it offensive when someone is called that by another person who is just trying to be mean and I will yell at people when they say it. When I'm discussing a medical diagnosis, I don't think it's offensive. My mother works in a group home, and I am going to school for speech pathology. It is a term I've grown up around; that is what it is called. I wasn't trying to be offensive.
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Old 03-27-2010, 05:02 PM   #300
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The thread title here caught my eye, LOL. It reminds me of when I came to the DIS, back in early '99, another DIS'er, Snoopy, now gone from here had a trip report in which she discussed having her toddler (now a teenager) on a leash. I have not read this thread here, but by the looks of it with the number pages, I would say it is similar to Snoopy's, lots of 'viewpoints', lots of opinions, LOL. When I talk with Snoopy, I still reminder of that, as well as her double stroller from hell experience in AK,

Miss ya, Snoop.
Awww, I miss Snoops, too!!
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