Frustrated!! UPDATE POST#81 - The DIS Discussion Forums

tink1978 · 11-01-2009, 05:00 PM

Okay..this is a family issue and I would just like to know whether you all think I was right or wrong on it.

My brother (who is 28) called me today asking to "borrow" my son's Wii for a while (he just moved and does not have cable hooked up yet). I told him that I did not feel comfortable with that as he had "borrowed" my son's XBox 360 8 months ago and has not returned it either. I told him that I was concerned that I would not get the Wii back either. I told him to let me think about it and I would get back with him (I intended on discussing it with my husband first). My brother said calmly, "Never mind, I will just go ahead and buy one for myself." I said, "Okay."

About 15 minutes later, my dad calls and asks me if he was going to have to buy my brother a Wii. I told him that was between he and my brother and the decision was his. He said, "You really are not going to let him borrow the Wii for a few days?" I proceeded to explain to him the situation. He then stated that he could not believe that I would do that, that he can't believe I am "that kind of person" and that I am not being helpful to my family, and that my decision was going to "come back to haunt" me. I got angry at this point and told him that it was really my decision and that he should not be involved in it at all and should respect my decisions instead of guilting me. He then stated that this was a disrespectful comment to make to him. I told him again that this was my decision and a situation between me and my brother and that I was finished discussing it with him. I hung up.

I am so frustrated because I hate feeling guilted by him and I hate feeling like a bad person for making a decision someone didn't like. I am usually very helpful toward everyone in my family. I hardly ever say no to them. I just felt that since he had already failed to return one game console, why should I let him "borrow" another?

Anyway, what do you all think? Was I wrong? Right?

Breezy_Carol · 11-01-2009, 05:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tink1978

I hardly ever say no to them. I just felt that since he had already failed to return one game console, why should I let him "borrow" another?

Anyway, what do you all think? Was I wrong? Right?

I think you were right. If you lent him the Wii, which is your son's and not yours to lend, and he didn't return it your father would be saying "Well he didn't return one. Why did you lend him another."

He made his own bed by not returning the first. Tell him to play it if he is bored. And since when is Wii a necessity? We don't have one. Can I borrow yours?

patsal · 11-01-2009, 05:06 PM

Ok..wait...your brother who is 28 told your dad on you and your dad is going to buy him a Wii because you won't give him yours to use indefinately? And your Dad is mad at you? After the non return of the other gaming system I wouldn't lend it either.
I would also wonder how your not giving up your stuff would come back to haunt you assuming you take care of all your own stuff and do not borrow big ticket items from others.
This will blow over and if all it takes is a $199 gaming system to end a family relationship than shame on them!

mtemm · 11-01-2009, 05:08 PM

that is insane. can't tell you how to feel, but I wouldn't feel guilty, not one bit. did you ask him where the xbox was?

We_love_WDW · 11-01-2009, 05:10 PM

No you were not wrong at all. Don't let them make you feel like you did something wrong.

Chernabog#1fan · 11-01-2009, 05:10 PM

I think you made the right decision.

When your father started to guilt you, you could have said that he would have to buy your son one if it was not returned in 5 days. Either way, he would probably end up having to buy one whether it be for your grown, adult brother or your son. That might have changed his tune.

tink1978 · 11-01-2009, 05:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mtemm

that is insane. can't tell you how to feel, but I wouldn't feel guilty, not one bit. did you ask him where the xbox was?

The XBox is at my parent's house which I am picking up tomorrow.

Mom-to-2-Princesses · 11-01-2009, 05:14 PM

you were right and I think you explained it very factually to your brother and father.

Have you ever noticed that he who protests the most is usually in the wrong? Yup - that's your brother! Sorry....

mom2rb · 11-01-2009, 05:16 PM

I would have told him to play the X-Box 360 for a few days then when the cable was hooked up he should give that back. I don't understand your dad at all, does he know that your brother still has your son's X-Box?

EthansMom · 11-01-2009, 05:16 PM

Both your brother and dad were out of line... waaaay out of line.

NC State · 11-01-2009, 05:20 PM

I would think a 28 year old telling daddy is way out of line....daddy cut the cord....please. What else is daddy having to pay for? I don't understand why adults can't be adults.

lillygator · 11-01-2009, 05:20 PM

wow, I would have told your brother to play the xbox he still has of yours.

lovetoscrap · 11-01-2009, 05:21 PM

Tell him to get a Library Card and read some books until the cable is hooked up. And remind him that if he doesn't return the books they could affect his credit rating!

wdwfan16 · 11-01-2009, 05:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tink1978

Okay..this is a family issue and I would just like to know whether you all think I was right or wrong on it.

My brother (who is 28) called me today asking to "borrow" my son's Wii for a while (he just moved and does not have cable hooked up yet). I told him that I did not feel comfortable with that as he had "borrowed" my son's XBox 360 8 months ago and has not returned it either. I told him that I was concerned that I would not get the Wii back either. I told him to let me think about it and I would get back with him (I intended on discussing it with my husband first). My brother said calmly, "Never mind, I will just go ahead and buy one for myself." I said, "Okay."

About 15 minutes later, my dad calls and asks me if he was going to have to buy my brother a Wii. I told him that was between he and my brother and the decision was his. He said, "You really are not going to let him borrow the Wii for a few days?" I proceeded to explain to him the situation. He then stated that he could not believe that I would do that, that he can't believe I am "that kind of person" and that I am not being helpful to my family, and that my decision was going to "come back to haunt" me. I got angry at this point and told him that it was really my decision and that he should not be involved in it at all and should respect my decisions instead of guilting me. He then stated that this was a disrespectful comment to make to him. I told him again that this was my decision and a situation between me and my brother and that I was finished discussing it with him. I hung up.

I am so frustrated because I hate feeling guilted by him and I hate feeling like a bad person for making a decision someone didn't like. I am usually very helpful toward everyone in my family. I hardly ever say no to them. I just felt that since he had already failed to return one game console, why should I let him "borrow" another?

Anyway, what do you all think? Was I wrong? Right?

You had every reason not to lend the Wii. Your brother has such an entitlement mentality that he told on you to your dad.

anniemae · 11-01-2009, 05:28 PM

I dont think you are wrong. It is your son's wii, plus they are expensive, it's not like it's a cd or something. Not sure why your dad had to get involved, my dad would have said, "work it out yourselves, I'm not getting involved!"

Tell your brother if he wants to play it, he can come over and play it with his nephew.

11-01-2009, 05:06 PM	#3
patsal I've discovered I don't need to be a control freak...and like it! Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Snowy, blowy and cold! Posts: 7,735	Ok..wait...your brother who is 28 told your dad on you and your dad is going to buy him a Wii because you won't give him yours to use indefinately? And your Dad is mad at you? After the non return of the other gaming system I wouldn't lend it either. I would also wonder how your not giving up your stuff would come back to haunt you assuming you take care of all your own stuff and do not borrow big ticket items from others. This will blow over and if all it takes is a $199 gaming system to end a family relationship than shame on them! __________________ Maleficent

11-01-2009, 05:10 PM	#5
We_love_WDW Mouseketeer Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 364	No you were not wrong at all. Don't let them make you feel like you did something wrong. __________________ ME(29) DH(29) DD(4) DS(2) '85 1st Trip offsite...'93 Port Orleans/CBR...Aug 2007 1st Trip as a Family POFQ...Sept 2008 POFQ w/ free dining and MNSSHP...July/Aug 2009 SSR...Nov 2009 BLT and MVMCP...June 2010 BWV/AKL...Oct 2010 BLT

11-01-2009, 05:10 PM	#6
Chernabog#1fan DVCOwner Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Orlando Posts: 151	I think you made the right decision. When your father started to guilt you, you could have said that he would have to buy your son one if it was not returned in 5 days. Either way, he would probably end up having to buy one whether it be for your grown, adult brother or your son. That might have changed his tune. __________________ King James Version

11-01-2009, 05:16 PM	#9
mom2rb DIS Veteran Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Katy,Texas Posts: 2,862	I would have told him to play the X-Box 360 for a few days then when the cable was hooked up he should give that back. I don't understand your dad at all, does he know that your brother still has your son's X-Box? __________________ Never argue with an idiot - they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience. 7/80 offsite, 7/84 offsite, 10/96 honeymoon at CBR, 9/03 Contemporary Wing, 12/04 SSR & AKL, 4/05 OKW & CSR, 9/05 BWV & OKW, 12/06 CSR & SSR, 06/07 VWL & BCV, 09/07 AKV & BWV, 09/09 BLT & SSR

11-01-2009, 05:16 PM	#10
EthansMom spare yourself from asking me to do karoake The experience reminds me somewhat of the ancient Chinese practice of foot-binding Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 7,457	Both your brother and dad were out of line... waaaay out of line. __________________ EthansMom (and Molly's too)

11-01-2009, 05:00 PM	#1
tink1978 DIS Veteran Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Chattanooga, Tennessee Posts: 1,401	Frustrated!! UPDATE POST#81 Okay..this is a family issue and I would just like to know whether you all think I was right or wrong on it. My brother (who is 28) called me today asking to "borrow" my son's Wii for a while (he just moved and does not have cable hooked up yet). I told him that I did not feel comfortable with that as he had "borrowed" my son's XBox 360 8 months ago and has not returned it either. I told him that I was concerned that I would not get the Wii back either. I told him to let me think about it and I would get back with him (I intended on discussing it with my husband first). My brother said calmly, "Never mind, I will just go ahead and buy one for myself." I said, "Okay." About 15 minutes later, my dad calls and asks me if he was going to have to buy my brother a Wii. I told him that was between he and my brother and the decision was his. He said, "You really are not going to let him borrow the Wii for a few days?" I proceeded to explain to him the situation. He then stated that he could not believe that I would do that, that he can't believe I am "that kind of person" and that I am not being helpful to my family, and that my decision was going to "come back to haunt" me. I got angry at this point and told him that it was really my decision and that he should not be involved in it at all and should respect my decisions instead of guilting me. He then stated that this was a disrespectful comment to make to him. I told him again that this was my decision and a situation between me and my brother and that I was finished discussing it with him. I hung up. I am so frustrated because I hate feeling guilted by him and I hate feeling like a bad person for making a decision someone didn't like. I am usually very helpful toward everyone in my family. I hardly ever say no to them. I just felt that since he had already failed to return one game console, why should I let him "borrow" another? Anyway, what do you all think? Was I wrong? Right? __________________ 31 (me) 10 (DS) 32 (DH) Last edited by tink1978; 11-07-2009 at 11:21 AM. Reason: updating

Sponsored Links
DIS ad Register to remove Join Date: 1997 Location: Orlando, FL Posts: 1,000,000+	<div align="center">This information cannot be displayed because your browser does not support inline frames.<a href="http://www.wdwinfo.com">Click Here</a> </div>

11-01-2009, 05:08 PM	#4
mtemm Doubly blessed Ever just have one of those days? I occasionally make a split breast for dh Join Date: Sep 1999 Location: Eastern MA, USA Posts: 4,983	that is insane. can't tell you how to feel, but I wouldn't feel guilty, not one bit. did you ask him where the xbox was?

11-01-2009, 05:14 PM	#8
Mom-to-2-Princesses Lovin' It! Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 718	you were right and I think you explained it very factually to your brother and father. Have you ever noticed that he who protests the most is usually in the wrong? Yup - that's your brother! Sorry.... __________________ [IMG] [/IMG]

11-01-2009, 05:20 PM	#11
NC State DIS Veteran Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Johnston Co, North Carolina Posts: 2,998	I would think a 28 year old telling daddy is way out of line....daddy cut the cord....please. What else is daddy having to pay for? I don't understand why adults can't be adults. __________________ Nov 26-Dec 4, 2010 - ASMu Sept 11-19, 2009 - ASMu Sept 5-13, 2008- Pop May 4-12, 2007- POR Sept-Oct 2005 - Pop / Oct-Nov 2006 - Pop Sept 2003 - CBR / May 1993 off site

11-01-2009, 05:20 PM	#12
lillygator Mom of two Princesses! Grew up wanting to be a can can girl let's just say my whoop whoop's woke the sleeping giant! Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: The World's Best Sand ~ Siesta Key, FL Posts: 28,835	wow, I would have told your brother to play the xbox he still has of yours. __________________ *V's Bad Girl Guide to Partying Through Panama!* Join my 2006 trip and planning adventures ~ *Bad Girl* style! Yo ho, yo ho A Pirate's Life for V ~ Comandeering the Disney Magic 12/9-12/16 Hide the rum, the 2007 Bad Girl Adventures have begun! '04 ~ Pop, AKL, ASMo, WL & Wonder Cruise! '05 ~ ASMo, CBR, CSR, ASMu, Pop, Poly & Eastern Cruise! '06 ~ POR, ASSports, ASMusic x 2, AKL, BWI, POP & Double Dip Cruise! '07 ~ CBR, ASMo, BCV x 2, OKW, Orlando Breeze, POP!! '08 ~ Offsite Knight's Inn YUCK! ~ Stealing the Magic ~ May Repo! Candy Cane Inn! '08 ~ May DCL Western!

11-01-2009, 05:21 PM	#13
lovetoscrap Sees tag fairy posts that aren't there Please bring back the Gecko and dump the stupid eyeballs Just a timy bit dixzy Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: The Pits of DISpair: AKA- NOT WDW Posts: 16,649	Tell him to get a Library Card and read some books until the cable is hooked up. And remind him that if he doesn't return the books they could affect his credit rating! __________________ SCRAPbooking, I love to SCRAPbook. Don't worry, you're not the only one that read it wrong! Another quality, content-rich post by LTS Tower of Tower Bus Lifts--the scariest ride in all of WDW! Grand Duchess of Airline Check Ins and UpgradesLady In Waiting of The Cheap Boxed Wine ChamberGrand Princess Royale of Cookieland

11-01-2009, 05:28 PM	#15
anniemae DIS Veteran Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 526	I dont think you are wrong. It is your son's wii, plus they are expensive, it's not like it's a cd or something. Not sure why your dad had to get involved, my dad would have said, "work it out yourselves, I'm not getting involved!" Tell your brother if he wants to play it, he can come over and play it with his nephew.

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes	Rate This Thread
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode	Rate This Thread: