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Old 09-13-2009, 11:03 PM   #1
mommy22pumpkins
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Puppy scratching daughters face...

I have a weird quetion to put on this board. We have a 6 month old puppy named Shamrock who is a little 5-6 lb. Bichon. A little white fluffy dog. My daughter is 5 and is too rough with her. I remind her to be gentle but she tends to overhandle her and pick her up and one time I saw her dangling her over the railing leading to downstairs (mind you the puppy is scared to walk down the stairs and I know Sara knew she was wrong for doing this and cried when I corrected her).

Today Shamrock scratched her right on her eye- the scratch goes from above her eye over her eyelid and below her eye. Thank goodness her eye was closed or she really could have had her eye injured. Now tonight I just got home and my husband tells me she scratched her again on the other side of her face. Not sure if it's just a welt or another scratch. But I don't know what to do I am afraid she is really going to hurt my daughter next time. I have seen her snap at her face before and yelled at her for it but this is totally out of control now.

Any advice on how to put a stop to this without getting rid of her. I know the kids still love her and she is not like this with anyone else with the exception of scratching when you're holding her if she's over-excited and you just walked in the door. I think she is like this with my daughter becasue she is too rough with her but that's no excuse obviously. Any advice or infomation you could give me would be apprecitated.
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Old 09-13-2009, 11:19 PM   #2
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snapping and scratching are 2 completely different things. If your daughter was scratched, it was accident. I think I heard those dremel type nail filers make a smoother nail and less likely to scratch.
This is not the dogs fault.
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Old 09-13-2009, 11:36 PM   #3
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puppies and kids

Puppies and little kids are tough; puppies will be puppies-- which includes both nipping and scratching until they learn better-- while the puppy nipping/scratching is a problem honestly it sounds like your daughter is the biggest issue here. Until she handles the pup appropriately/safely/in a manner less scary to the pup you can only expect the puppy to react in fear and self-defense. Little dogs and little kids tend to be big challenges and its really important that you rein this in quickly-- before the dog really dislikes or is forever fearful of the child.
A few thoughts-- are you crate training the dog? the crate can be used as a safe location for the dog, teach children they aren't allowed access-when the dog is in there that's where it stays until a grown up is ready to supervise interactions.
It's really hard, we all envision kids and puppies as the perfect match--you know, best friends forever-- but you have to have a safe environment where there's a lot of rules and structure for that to happen.
Also, check out this link for some good puppy/kiddo advice. www.traumhofgsd.com/childrenandpuppies.doc
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Old 09-13-2009, 11:39 PM   #4
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Two words: supervision and rules.

Wait, make that three words: supervision and strict rules.

Young children and animals need constant supervision.

A dog's instinct is to protect itself, for one thing. Also, rough play encourages, well, rough play. Have your DD play fetch with the dog, not rough games - which pit the dog against her.

But most importantly, you need to supervise their interactions at all times. Both the dog and the child need correction if they misbehave. It's a lot of work, I know. My children were 6 yo last time I had a puppy and I had my work cut out for me.

Good luck.
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Old 09-13-2009, 11:54 PM   #5
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If she is scratching, it is probably because she wants to get away/ or does not feel comfortable or supported when your daughter is holding her. I would suggest constant supervision when your daughter is around the dog- as others said, it's so important that she understands how to treat the dog. You admit that she is "too rough" with the puppy...can you imagine if someone was "too rough" with your child? She needs to learn the correct way to treat the animal.
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Old 09-14-2009, 12:10 AM   #6
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One of our children was like that with our cat at that age, and naturally the cat (who didn't bite anyone else) would bite him. Not hard, just warning bites. But obviously there was a problem.
Our solution was to absolutely forbid the child to have any physical contact with the cat. No, he didn't like the rule and it was a real pain to supervise constantly because it was hard for him to resist touching the cat. But it was necessary for the cat's well being and to teach our child that being unkind to an animal--even just "being too rough"--is completely unacceptable. This lasted about a month and then we allowed our child to gradually show us under supervision that he was able to control himself and treat the kitty nicely.

Kids don't have a god-given right to touch (let alone harm) pets. Barring any developmental issues, five is old enough kids to learn to use gentle touch, not carry a dog around, leave an animal alone when it wants to be left alone, and so on.
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Old 09-14-2009, 12:24 AM   #7
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It isn't the dogs fault! Poor little thing is trying to get away from her. You even admit she is rough and "overhandles" her, does this mean she holds the dog when it doesn't want held and holds it too tight? Of course the puppy is panicking and that means scrambling and scratching to get away.

I like the suggestion that unless an adult is present she doesn't pick up the dog at all- and this has to be strictly enforced. The puppy has the right to not be mishandled and treated meanly and you as the adult have the responsibility to make sure this happens.

And your right there is no excuse for your daughter to be allowed to get away with mistreating an animal.
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Old 09-14-2009, 12:57 AM   #8
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Bichons are one the most sweet natured, gentle dogs around. I have one, he's 7 mos. old. Just thinking about a child being too rough with mine makes me sad and furious all at the same time. Please take the advice here, and only allow supervised contact. Your puppy needs you to make sure she is handled in an appropriate manner.
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Old 09-14-2009, 01:21 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *BTMRR* View Post
One of our children was like that with our cat at that age, and naturally the cat (who didn't bite anyone else) would bite him. Not hard, just warning bites. But obviously there was a problem.
Our solution was to absolutely forbid the child to have any physical contact with the cat. No, he didn't like the rule and it was a real pain to supervise constantly because it was hard for him to resist touching the cat. But it was necessary for the cat's well being and to teach our child that being unkind to an animal--even just "being too rough"--is completely unacceptable. This lasted about a month and then we allowed our child to gradually show us under supervision that he was able to control himself and treat the kitty nicely.

Kids don't have a god-given right to touch (let alone harm) pets. Barring any developmental issues, five is old enough kids to learn to use gentle touch, not carry a dog around, leave an animal alone when it wants to be left alone, and so on.
This is SPOT ON. Your child is the problem, not the puppy. You already realize that she handles the poor thing roughly and inappropriately.

Your daughter is definitely old enough to learn how to handle a pet the right way. YOU need to protect the puppy. If you don't feel you can do that, or if you don't feel your daughter can learn how to treat an animal correctly at her age...then I hope you do re-home the dog.

I don't think you have an aggressive or problem dog at all. I think you just need to teach your daughter how to handle her appropriately. And be sure the puppy's nails are trimmed well at the vets to avoid any inadvertent scratching.
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Old 09-14-2009, 01:35 AM   #10
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My mother worked at a dental school and one of the doctors there treated multiple children each week for facial injuries due to the family dog. I agree with all of the previous posters who said that strict rules and supervised play may solve the problem. Children and dogs should NEVER be left alone in a room without an adult present, even for a few minutes. If you need to leave the room, take either the child or the dog with you.

Being unpredictable is natural for both children and dogs. If children were always predictable, they would always follow the rules and never need supervision. The same is true for pets.

For the safety of both your daughter and the puppy, keep them apart until both have grown up a lot more and can understand and follow the rules (unless you are right there).

Maybe consider taking puppy training classes together with you so they can both learn the rules together?
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Old 09-14-2009, 06:11 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *BTMRR* View Post
One of our children was like that with our cat at that age, and naturally the cat (who didn't bite anyone else) would bite him. Not hard, just warning bites. But obviously there was a problem.
Our solution was to absolutely forbid the child to have any physical contact with the cat. No, he didn't like the rule and it was a real pain to supervise constantly because it was hard for him to resist touching the cat. But it was necessary for the cat's well being and to teach our child that being unkind to an animal--even just "being too rough"--is completely unacceptable. This lasted about a month and then we allowed our child to gradually show us under supervision that he was able to control himself and treat the kitty nicely.

Kids don't have a god-given right to touch (let alone harm) pets. Barring any developmental issues, five is old enough kids to learn to use gentle touch, not carry a dog around, leave an animal alone when it wants to be left alone, and so on.
Quote:
Originally Posted by HeatherH View Post
This is SPOT ON. Your child is the problem, not the puppy. You already realize that she handles the poor thing roughly and inappropriately.

Your daughter is definitely old enough to learn how to handle a pet the right way. YOU need to protect the puppy. If you don't feel you can do that, or if you don't feel your daughter can learn how to treat an animal correctly at her age...then I hope you do re-home the dog.

I don't think you have an aggressive or problem dog at all. I think you just need to teach your daughter how to handle her appropriately. And be sure the puppy's nails are trimmed well at the vets to avoid any inadvertent scratching.
I completely agree. The poor little puppy is afraid and is trying to get away. Your daughter should not be allowed to hold the puppy at all or have contact with the puppy unsupervised until you are certain she can treat the puppy in an appropriate manner. I am really concerned that you say you found your daughter dangling the puppy over the stairwell even though she knew it was wrong.
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Old 09-14-2009, 07:17 AM   #12
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Your daughter is abusing this puppy. She's old enough to know better. If she can't stop, then she can't be allowed near him.

If you can't control your daughter's behavior, do the puppy a favor and find him a loving home where he can be loved without fear of being tortured. Dogs are not toys - they are living things.

Hanging the dog over a railing? Seriously? I can't imagine what she's done to the puppy while you weren't looking.
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Old 09-14-2009, 07:26 AM   #13
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That puppy is doing nothing wrong! Your daughter is old enough to know better, and you can bet if that were my child, there'd be some serious consequences to that kind of abuse.

You should never leave the dog alone with her -- ever. Think it sounds harsh? No, it's just reality. That's why a lot of shelters and rescues have a rule of not adopting to families with small children. This is exactly the type of thing that happens and the dog either gets hurt or gets sent back because of the dog's "problems."

If you don't think you're going to be able to keep them apart, then yes, you should probably find that pup a home before he gets any older.
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Old 09-14-2009, 08:19 AM   #14
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Nothing to add here. It's been said by the PP's. Stop the puppy abuse or find it a new home.
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Old 09-14-2009, 08:52 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *BTMRR* View Post
One of our children was like that with our cat at that age, and naturally the cat (who didn't bite anyone else) would bite him. Not hard, just warning bites. But obviously there was a problem.
Our solution was to absolutely forbid the child to have any physical contact with the cat. No, he didn't like the rule and it was a real pain to supervise constantly because it was hard for him to resist touching the cat. But it was necessary for the cat's well being and to teach our child that being unkind to an animal--even just "being too rough"--is completely unacceptable. This lasted about a month and then we allowed our child to gradually show us under supervision that he was able to control himself and treat the kitty nicely.

Kids don't have a god-given right to touch (let alone harm) pets. Barring any developmental issues, five is old enough kids to learn to use gentle touch, not carry a dog around, leave an animal alone when it wants to be left alone, and so on.

I agree with this post 100%. I wouldn't allow DD to touch the dog at all. This is a really good learning experience for your DD - she can learn that bullying and being too rough is not acceptable at all.
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