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Old 09-11-2009, 08:16 PM   #1
autumnpalm
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How many friends do you have?

I'm posting this just because I'm curious to see how others respond. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one in the world that's okay with not having tons of friends!

I have a two really close friends who I see often and I can tell anything to. I feel like I can be completely myself with them and I love them. Outside of them, I have two or three friends who I see on a regular basis and I enjoy talking with them, hanging out with them and call them if I want to see a movie, go out for drinks, etc. I don't feel like I can tell them anything but we are still close.

Outside of that, my family are my friends. My mom is my best friend and I am also close with my brother and one of my cousins.

I know people who have a lot more friends than I do, but I honestly couldn't keep up with having any more! I enjoy spending time alone and studying, reading, etc (I'm in university right now) and I'm perfectly happy not having tons and tons of friends. Sometimes I worry I'm not "normal" but... I like my life!

Can anyone else out there relate?
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Old 09-11-2009, 08:33 PM   #2
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I am part of a group of five women who have been close since middle school. They are my closest friends who I can tell anything to, however, none of us live in the same town ...then I have 6 or 7 local friends who I call for a movie, night out, etc. I enjoy spending time with them but it's not the same as "my girls."

I agree with you - with friends, it's definitely quality, not quantity, that counts!
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Old 09-11-2009, 08:35 PM   #3
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Hundreds of friends, but only about 20 really close friends...
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Old 09-11-2009, 08:35 PM   #4
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Nah, I don't think you're strange, since I'm the same. I have my sister, who is my best friend, we fight a lot, but we still love each other. Then I have my 2 best friends that I would do anything for, and they would do anything for me. I don't get to see them as often as I would like, since we're all busy, and one of them moved about an hour away, but we always pick up right where we left off. Those are my true friends, the people who's pictures I have in frames around my room.

Then, I have some other friends that I'm close to, but I probably wouldn't be close enough to go on a vacation with, but they help me out a lot when I need it. They wouldn't be the first ones I would call with news, but they would definitely know soon enough. I would say I have maybe 3 or 4 of them.

Then, everyone else, I really consider an acquaintance. I might know them say from the hospital or from school. We might go out after a rough day, or after an exam or whatever, and they're good company, but not the people I would consider my nearest and dearest. Say there was some sort of tragedy, they would be the people to send a card, maybe make a brief visit, whereas my friends would come over the second I called.

I'm OK with that, I'm quite happy like that. I don't need to get caught up in unnecessary drama, and I know that my friends will be there through thick and thin, whenever I need them. And the amount of laughs we share, you would think we were a giant group of 20 instead of 3 or 4.
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Old 09-11-2009, 09:03 PM   #5
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Not many.....lost touch with most over the years.

BFF and my DD are my best friends. That is pretty much it.
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Old 09-11-2009, 09:15 PM   #6
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Other then wife and relatives who are obligated to be my friend, I'd say one and he lives in Orlando about 15 minutes from WDW.

I don't have time to be social.
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Old 09-11-2009, 09:19 PM   #7
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I have a few close friends I've known since kindergarten or middle school and we've all stayed pretty close over the years. I made a couple of good friends as an adult in college, and even more recently I've been on my class reunion committee -- I've known these people since school and I wish we'd spent more time together back then. I'm really bonding with them.

But, I really have no single best friend, which I miss. My best friend and I haven't been close in years. When we talk, it's just like old times, but we just can't seem to connect like we used to.
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Old 09-11-2009, 09:21 PM   #8
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What I consider to be real friends.... less than 10, and probably closer to 5.
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Old 09-11-2009, 10:04 PM   #9
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Hi autumnpalm,

I used to worry about having so few friends. Then I got much bigger worries in my life and was distracted from the problem.

You see, I got sick and had to give up my hobbies that involved other people. I really missed the socialization and realized that I didn't have close friends, more acquaintances. It was not easy to forge friendships without my extracurricular activities.

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Old 09-11-2009, 11:01 PM   #10
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I've lost touch with most of my friends. There's really no one to just call and talk to. I have friends that my husband and I do things with every once in a while, but no close, pour your heart out friends.
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Old 09-11-2009, 11:16 PM   #11
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well my DH is my best friend and really the only person I tell everything to. Other than him, I have 3 other really close friends I have been friends with since middle school(2 women, 1 man). Though we don't spend as much time together as we used to, I still consider them my only other "good" friends.
Other than those 4 people, I have other people who I suppose could be considered friends, but I don't really talk to them much or keep up with them, so I guess they would more be considered acquaintances. So really only 4 people I'd consider close friends.

I feel sad to have so few friends sometimes, but it's really my own fault as I am tragically unsocial and shy and do not make friends easily. I have a hard time talking to new people and letting them in.
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Old 09-11-2009, 11:25 PM   #12
Liberty Belle
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shyvioletisme View Post
well my DH is my best friend and really the only person I tell everything to. Other than him, I have 3 other really close friends I have been friends with since middle school(2 women, 1 man). Though we don't spend as much time together as we used to, I still consider them my only other "good" friends.
Other than those 4 people, I have other people who I suppose could be considered friends, but I don't really talk to them much or keep up with them, so I guess they would more be considered acquaintances. So really only 4 people I'd consider close friends.

I feel sad to have so few friends sometimes, but it's really my own fault as I am tragically unsocial and shy and do not make friends easily. I have a hard time talking to new people and letting them in.
Same here. I mean, I'm not that shy really, just...I don't know. I just lack the ability to really become close friends with someone, I guess. I mean I used to be able to, but not anymore, it seems.

And then, it's hard to find people that I really "mesh" with. No one seems to have the same interests or communication style. I'm not fond of perky/laughy chit chat like so many woman seem to be. I tend to be able to become closer to males. I'm not sure why.
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Old 09-12-2009, 01:00 AM   #13
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From all the years of being involved with the kids and living in a small community I know a ton of people, however I am not overly fond of most of them.
I have 1 true best friend that knows everything. She lives next door and we have a gate in our back fence to each others yards. We chat and catch up almost every night of the week.

I have a second friend who I am also close with and have been for years, our sons have been best friends since 3rd grade. We talk every day.

There are 3 other woman that with the 2 above and myself make up a group that gets together for drinks at least once a month. Our bond, all of us with the exception of my BFF had a child who graduated high school in 2008 and we have known each other for years. We didn't all get close until the kid's senior year and the kids are friends but not necessarily tight, some more than others.

I also have 2 woman I met here on the Dis that I talk with quite regularly and even though we have never met I really enjoy the relationship we have developed with each other.

I didn't "get" the whole need for close friends, especially female friends until I got into my late 30's and realized we were not competing with each other like girls did when I was younger. I realized how important they are and I treasure these relationships.

I don't think it is strange to have a friend or 2 at all.
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Old 09-12-2009, 01:09 AM   #14
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I have 12 people I'd call true friends, the ones I regularly socialize with, follow the goings on in each other's families, etc. I have tons of acquaintances, but they're not theones I'd call in the middle of the night if I needed someone. Any of the 12 would be there for me in a minute, and I for them. My friends keep me sane and save me a lot of money by not needing a therapist!

My DH has 15 close friends, so close that when they get together and one can't make it, they're all depressed! Pathetic.
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Old 09-12-2009, 01:13 AM   #15
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While I make "friends" fairly easily, most of them are really just acquaintances. There are only a handful of people who know me, truly know me, on every level. My boyfriend is my absolute best friend. He has seen every facet of my personality and loves me for who I really am. The same can be said for my mom, as well as my freshman-year college roommate. She is the best definition of a sister to me. These are the three people who know my story, who "get" me, with whom I can share anything and everything.
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