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Old 09-29-2009, 09:32 PM   #916
Angelrose
Likes to dance in golden sun beams
Knows too many details about Gnarf, Fnarfle, Grotchy and Ronkle....yep, she needs help!! ;)
Drives me even crazier than I am
 
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Today was a very hard day. It was nice and cool this morning so I went for a walk at Smithville. I saw the custodian and he asked where Ron was. So I had to tell him about Ron's passing. The tears came out. He was very nice and gave his condolences. Then a little while later I saw his wife and she came over and hugged me and said how shocked she was and how sorry. Right when I was about to leave, I saw the maintenance man and he had heard about Ron from the custodian. He felt so bad and gave his condolences. I cried again. This afternoon it was still cool so I went for another walk. I went into the angel shop because I needed a cheer up. The girl there didn't know about Ron either. She was so shocked. She just started to cry and gave me a big hug. She felt so bad. We were among her first customers when she first started. I gave her one of my crystal angels and it has hung in her window ever since. she talked to me and although I cried and it was very hard, I did feel better. She is a very spiritual person and told me she knew that Ron was beside me taking our walks together. I really hope that is so. Well now, everyone at Smithville knows about Ron. Maybe I can have my walks and not cry. Maybe someday I can talk about Ron and NOT cry. I don't think that will happen for a very long time.
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Old 09-29-2009, 09:53 PM   #917
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Angelrose,



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Old 09-29-2009, 10:00 PM   #918
Minnie&Nana
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Oh, Angelrose...I am so sorry you had a difficult day. Try to rememebr that tears bring us a kind of comfort and I think these things happen to us when we are in need of a good cry. Some people say tears are healing - but we do not heal when a loved one leaves us too soon..and it is always too soon. In time, a long time, the pain will get softer...tears will not be just under the surface, but even after many years, a thought, a memory, will bring tears again.

This happened to me just today...I was thinking about our December trip to Disney...then I remembered our first family trip when Mia & Toby were 7 & 8....as I walked down memory lane, the tears came. I wanted to cry out how much I miss Toby....but it passed quickly and I was fine in a couple of minutes.

It takes time for our hearts to begin to mend...never completely, but I promise, it will get easier. Let the tears come....Ron is with you every moment if each day and he will help you get through one day at a time...some days one moment at a time.

Thank you so much for trusting us with this unexpected journey. We love you, Angelrose, and hold you ever so near in our hearts, thoughts and prayer everyday.
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Old 09-29-2009, 11:09 PM   #919
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to you....
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Old 09-30-2009, 08:42 PM   #920
Angelrose
Likes to dance in golden sun beams
Knows too many details about Gnarf, Fnarfle, Grotchy and Ronkle....yep, she needs help!! ;)
Drives me even crazier than I am
 
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Thank you Tuffcookie, Minnie&Nana and sunnyday123. Today was a better day. I got a call this morning from the Christmas store in Smithville that my Jim Shore figurine, Nana from Peter Pan was in. I was so happy. It has been retired and not easy to find. Her rep looked through the whole warehouse to see if they had any. They had two on a back shelf. I got one and the Christmas store has the other. I stopped in the beanie store and talked to my other friend for a bit. By the time I got home I was so tired. But it felt good.
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Old 10-01-2009, 05:50 PM   #921
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I haven't checked on you in a few weeks but wanted to let you know that I think of you often. I hope you are having a great day.
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Old 10-02-2009, 09:27 PM   #922
Angelrose
Likes to dance in golden sun beams
Knows too many details about Gnarf, Fnarfle, Grotchy and Ronkle....yep, she needs help!! ;)
Drives me even crazier than I am
 
Join Date: Mar 2000
Location: Port Republic, New Jersey
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I had a great time last night. I went over to the kid's house around 4:15 and Chuck wasn't home yet. So I just sat on the porch for a few minutes to relax. Chuck pulled in and Jesse was waving to me and laughing. He got out of the van so excited to see me. They went to the mailbox to get the mail and Jesse kept looking back and saying grandmom. We went inside and he gave me a big hug and was showing me his basketball. We talked for a while and I played with Jesse. Karen came home and we all talked for a while and Karen told me this story about Jesse. He was in his car seat and looked over to where I usually sit and said Grandmom chair. Karen said yes that's Grandmom's chair. He lifted up his hands and said Grandmom? As if to say well, there's her chair, where's Grandmom? Isn't that cute? He's putting lots of words together. Chuck distracted Jesse and Karen and I left to pick up her cousin, aunt and grandmom. We went to this really tiny Italian restaurant. But the food was fabulous! We all devoured our dinner. Karen and I were the only ones to get dessert. I got a conolli and she got the chocolate, hazelnut cake. Both were so good. We sat around and talked for a while. Our waiter was great. Very funny and he put up with us. I don't think we will be allowed in there again. LOL We left and went to Grandmoms house and talked for another hour. We left and I stopped in to say goodnight to Chuck and Karen and drove home. I didn't get home until 10:15. I was really tired but for some reason I couldn't get to sleep last night.

This morning I went to the dentist and everything is fine for now, but sooner, rather than later I will need to get caps on my two front teeth. Oh Goody. Maybe next year. I stopped at my dr's office to show him my new insurance card and they are out of network. That means I will have to pay something more than the copay. I will try it and see how much more I will have to pay. I would really hate to leave him since I've been with him forever. I got the last flu shot they had. Someone had cancelled and I got it. My arm aches a bit, but not too bad. Chuck called when I got home and said he would be right over. He bought me two new florescent bulbs, but I need a whole new fixture. So we talked for a while and he gave me a couple of pictures of Jesse. I will try and post them in the couple of days. After he left I was going to take a walk. But I was feeling a little light headed. Maybe from the shot? So I decided to lay down for a few minutes. The next thing I know the phone is ringing and it's some $%@*& politician wanting me to vote for him. I looked at the clock and I had been asleep for over two hours! I felt better when I got up.

So I had a really good day yesterday and today.

Thank you reelmom. It's good to know so many people are thinking good thoughts for me.
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Old 10-02-2009, 10:12 PM   #923
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Angelrose - so good to see that it is getting a little easier. Two weeks ago, was the first anniversary of my DH's death. My daughters, grandson and I got through the week with some difficulty, but we did it!!! I feel his presence always within me, and that is most comforting.
My hope for you is continued calm and warmth within!!! Caroline
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Old 10-03-2009, 01:13 AM   #924
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Hi Angelrose

Just wanted to stop by and I see that amongst the not so good days there are some that are not so bad Hoping that soon, they will be more often than the heavy-heart ones. Gosh, we all have them and it's part of the journey isn't it. Sets us back when they happen upon us though.

I am just back from Disney and have been feeling kind of poorly since my return. Guess that's the trade off for some fun in the sun? I am off to Quebec City this Sunday so hoping I feel ALL better before then!!

Keep doing what you are doing, you are amazing you know.
Thinking of you...always
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Old 10-03-2009, 07:48 AM   #925
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Angelrose, sounds like you had a fabulous time out! And good for you for getting the flu shot, that's one less think you'll have to worry about!
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Old 10-03-2009, 04:53 PM   #926
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Sorry you had soem rough times over these past few days. But I'm glad to hear you had some good times too. Glad the gyno visit is over and it went well. Have you scheduled the mamo yet?

Y'all were so bad at dinner they won't let you back?
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Old 10-03-2009, 08:34 PM   #927
Angelrose
Likes to dance in golden sun beams
Knows too many details about Gnarf, Fnarfle, Grotchy and Ronkle....yep, she needs help!! ;)
Drives me even crazier than I am
 
Join Date: Mar 2000
Location: Port Republic, New Jersey
Posts: 3,121

chell, about that dinner. I refuse to answer on the grounds that we are all very guilty of being very silly.

minnie56, I hope you had a great time at Disney! But hope you are feeling better soon. Only 68 more days until I go!

Today was a pretty good day. I went to the Octoberfest at Smithville today. It's a big craft fair. I love to go and look at all the things people make. But lately it seems like it's the same stuff year after year. There is one lady that I have been buying her soft sculptures for years. I have 16 of her witches, bunnies, angels and fairies. They are really beautiful. I had to tell her about Ron today. She was so shocked. I knew she was going to ask where he was, so I had to tell her. But I managed to keep it together pretty much. I didn't want to spoil her day by breaking down. I walked around for about an hour and the only thing I bought was a loaf of cherry/pineapple bread. OMG I could have eaten the whole loaf at once. Not going to buy any more of that!

I thought you would like to see some pictures of Jesse.

Big cheesy smile



He woke up like this one morning



Official picture taken at the mall in his Halloween costume



he hated wearing any costume. So for Halloween he's wearing a t shirt that says I'm afraid of my costume so I'm wearing this t shirt. LOL


Here's one that Chuck took at home where he is in a better mood

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Old 10-03-2009, 09:25 PM   #928
minnie56
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Awww...he's so cute!! He looks mischievous
Is he?

Thanks Angelrose...today it seems to be turning to a cold after pretty much running the gamut! This too shall pass right?

Wish I was going back to WDW..that's the bad thing about going there..you miss it all over again when you come home!

I am off and away for a couple of days...hope you all have a great Sunday and Monday to follow..
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Old 10-03-2009, 09:32 PM   #929
Angelrose
Likes to dance in golden sun beams
Knows too many details about Gnarf, Fnarfle, Grotchy and Ronkle....yep, she needs help!! ;)
Drives me even crazier than I am
 
Join Date: Mar 2000
Location: Port Republic, New Jersey
Posts: 3,121

oh yes, he is a typical boy! His mom will tell him not to do something and he will look at her and do it anyway! Then he wonders why he gets a time out! LOL But all in all he is a good boy.
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Old 10-03-2009, 09:33 PM   #930
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He is completely adorable!!! Makes me want to hug him too! I would ask how they wake up like that but I've woken up with my nightgown on weird. At least you know he is sleeping good.

We have our almost 7 year old nephew tonight. His birthday is this Thursday. Earlier he told us when he turns 7 he is going to start inventing things. The first thing he is going to work on is a flying boat. In the car on the way home he said "Mommy will let me build it in the garage as long as there are no explosions." Out of the mouths of babes.

Yesterday I got my biopsy results back. Everything was clear and there were no signs of cancer. There was some irritation, but thankfully no cancer. I have to go see her on the 22nd to figure out where we go next. Now we know the pain and nausea isn't from ulcers or cancer. Thank you all for your support.

Octoberfest craft fairs are fun. Ours is next weekend. I'm hoping that we have a good turn out this year. Some big event in Charlotte that a friend of mine went to a few weeks ago didn't have a good turn out from the vendors and she was disappointed. There was a vendor she wanted to buy something from who wasn't there. We figured they weren't there because of the economy; they probably couldn't afford to go. I hope we don't see that at Octoberfest.

Anyway, I'm glad you went today. I'm sorry you are running into so many people right now that you have to tell about Ron. It does say a lot about you and Ron for all of these people to notice he isn't with you and to ask about him. It says how much people think of both of you and how wonderful you both are; how much they care for you both.

Do you have any special plans this week?
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