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Old 10-14-2014, 11:27 AM   #1
anniemae
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Birthday party question

My DS5 was invited to a birthday party that was supposed to be last weekend. We replied that we would go, but the birthday boy got sick and the party was canceled. The party was rescheduled for this Saturday and unfortunately we cannot make it.

My question is, should I still get a gift for the birthday boy? Usually we do not get a gift for a classmates party if we decline the invite, but since I accepted the original invite, should I still get a gift and give it to his mom at drop off?
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Old 10-14-2014, 11:29 AM   #2
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Originally Posted by anniemae View Post
My DS5 was invited to a birthday party that was supposed to be last weekend. We replied that we would go, but the birthday boy got sick and the party was canceled. The party was rescheduled for this Saturday and unfortunately we cannot make it.

My question is, should I still get a gift for the birthday boy? Usually we do not get a gift for a classmates party if we decline the invite, but since I accepted the original invite, should I still get a gift and give it to his mom at drop off?
It would be nice if you still gave a gift, but I don't see anyway it would be expected. Have you already let the parents know you can't make the new date?

Of course, if this is a good friend, that might increase the odds of giving a gift, but again, I don't see it as anything other than "nice to do".
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Old 10-14-2014, 11:29 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by anniemae View Post
My DS5 was invited to a birthday party that was supposed to be last weekend. We replied that we would go, but the birthday boy got sick and the party was canceled. The party was rescheduled for this Saturday and unfortunately we cannot make it.

My question is, should I still get a gift for the birthday boy? Usually we do not get a gift for a classmates party if we decline the invite, but since I accepted the original invite, should I still get a gift and give it to his mom at drop off?
Yes.
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Old 10-14-2014, 12:53 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by anniemae View Post
My DS5 was invited to a birthday party that was supposed to be last weekend. We replied that we would go, but the birthday boy got sick and the party was canceled. The party was rescheduled for this Saturday and unfortunately we cannot make it.

My question is, should I still get a gift for the birthday boy? Usually we do not get a gift for a classmates party if we decline the invite, but since I accepted the original invite, should I still get a gift and give it to his mom at drop off?
I would.
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Old 10-14-2014, 01:19 PM   #5
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Thanks everyone, I guess I'll run out tonight and get a gift! Wasn't sure of the proper protocol, but I guess it makes sense since I was going to go originally.
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Old 10-14-2014, 01:38 PM   #6
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Thanks everyone, I guess I'll run out tonight and get a gift! Wasn't sure of the proper protocol, but I guess it makes sense since I was going to go originally.
Im sorry but I wouldnt.

My DD missed a very good friends birthday party this summer and I bought a gift anyhow, but for just a classmate who probably invited the whole class , nope I woukdnt.
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Old 10-14-2014, 01:40 PM   #7
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Yes, it is just a classmate who invited the whole class, not a close friend if that makes a difference in anyones opinion.
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Old 10-14-2014, 02:07 PM   #8
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I think you could go either way on this one, especially since it was a whole-class invite and not a good friend of your child. A small gift would be a nice surprise, but not expected in any way, IMO.
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Old 10-14-2014, 02:29 PM   #9
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I did once when my dd got sick and missed a party. But I knew the little girl's parents were going through a divorce and the mom had been out of work so I sent a small gift card. Generally I probably wouldn't.

I had one girl RSVP yes and not show up two years in a row and not send a gift. And another boy who couldn't come at the last minute and the mom was very apologetic and said she'd drop off a gift and never did.
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Old 10-14-2014, 02:36 PM   #10
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my daughter just turned 4 so I am just beginning to navigate birthday party etiquette but I would not give a gift in the situation you described. The date of party you rsvp'd yes to was changed and you cannot make the new date - so no gift required imho.
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Old 10-14-2014, 02:52 PM   #11
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no, I wouldn't go out and get a gift for a party you can't attend. I understand you were going to attend the first one, but it not being a good friend, I wouldn't.
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Old 10-14-2014, 03:09 PM   #12
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honestly based on what you wrote, I wouldn't bother. during those "invite the whole class" years, kids get so much stuff. It would be a nice gesture, but totally unnecessary and I'm guessing unexpected.
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Old 10-14-2014, 03:11 PM   #13
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If this isn't a child your son is very close to, or you aren't close to his parents then I wouldn't worry about it.

Sounds like they just invited the class (I guess those are the rules now). It's not your fault they had to reschedule.

If you had already purchased a gift I would say go ahead, but it sounds like you are making a special trip to get it- I wouldn't do that.
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Old 10-14-2014, 03:26 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by anniemae View Post
My question is, should I still get a gift for the birthday boy? Usually we do not get a gift for a classmates party if we decline the invite, but since I accepted the original invite, should I still get a gift and give it to his mom at drop off?
Do you or your son socialize with this boy outside of school ?

How do you plan to get the gift the boy? I would NOT do it at school.
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Old 10-14-2014, 04:01 PM   #15
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I would if the kids are good friends and play outside of school.

If it is an "in school" friend I would not.
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