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Old 11-14-2008, 01:49 PM   #1
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Day of Remembrance for our loved ones Dec 21

I did this last year here on the DIS. If you would post the names of those people you would like to remember I will post all the names in the first post.

We would all light a candle to remember all those people who are no longer with us but we hold them in our hearts. OR Those people that need special prayers this upcoming holiday season. December 21st is the shortest day of the year and I thought it would be a good time to remember our loved ones.

Please share your stories here also. I know this can be a tough time for many. I know I take comfort in my memories when we have "those" moments.

Memorial Candles

As we light these four candles in honor of you,

we light one for our grief,

one for our courage,

one for our memories,

and one for our love.

This candle represents our grief. The pain of losing you is intense. It reminds us of the depth of our love for you.

This candle represents our courage-- to confront our sorrow-- to comfort each other, to change our lives.

This light is in your memory-- the times we laughed, the times cried, the times we were angry with each other, the silly things you did, the caring and joy you gave us.

This light is the light of love. As we enter this holiday season, day by day we cherish the special place in our hearts that will always be reserved for you. We thank you for the gift your living brought to each of us.

We love you

As posted on Prodigy's Grief and Death board by Cathy Tholen.. This group was a lifesaver for me when my husband passed away.

Last edited by safetymom; 12-17-2008 at 05:50 PM.
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Old 11-14-2008, 01:50 PM   #2
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Not THE KATHY, but, plain old Kathy
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Now living near the parks!
Posts: 42,164

Safetymom- My late darling husband Fran and my parents. You will always hold a special place in my heart.

CDoobee- Please add my DD, Hilary, to the list.

A Mickeyfan- Please add my Mom, Betty.

SueM in MN- Please add my nephew, Lee.

CarolAnnC- My late (first) husband Michael...

Kimis- Please add my mom, Leila, to the list.

JerJan- Please add my DH to the list.

CarolynU- Please add DH Roger.

WDWLVR- My mother - Mary Ellen Cheney and My grandmother - Marie Rile

Antmaril- Please add my husband, Mat, to the list.

Talking Hands- Please add my parents Nancy and Risden Lyle and my brother Risden Graham.

Karen l- Please add my DH James who passed away from lung cancer.

Luvsmickeymouse- My father, Milton Manchester and A long time friend of mine, Maureen Noble, aka Mickey's neighbor on the DIS.

Caropooh- Please add my mother, Shirley Strong.

Jmkms- Please add my dad, Walter Shaffer Sr to the list.

Judy Judy Judy- Please add someone special for me : Lucy Phillips....always in my heart!!!!!!!!!!!

Steffiesunshine- My mother Carol Colt and My sister Justine Colt-Sullivan.

Oybolshoi- Please add my brother Mike to the list.

Louey- Please add my Dad (Pops).

Mousehouselover- Please add my MIL Susan to the list.

Megan07- I'd like to add my Dad- Tom to the list.

Disneyfamily71- Please add my dad Bill.

TammyAlphabet- I lost my DH on Feb.3 of this year.

Hroyale- Please add my DM June Haynes.

Torontogal- Please add my dear "Papa" to your list.

Julm26- Please add my mom, Geraldine Davies.

Luvdzny- Please add my daughter's boyfriend, Devon.

helenk- Please add my mother Helen

annie1995- Please add my Grandpa who passed away from heart disease 15 years ago. And also my Uncle/GodFather who died Oct 31, 2006.

Tarheel girl 1975- Please add my dad Bill to the list.

Last edited by safetymom; 12-21-2008 at 09:27 AM.
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Old 11-14-2008, 04:38 PM   #3
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Please add my DD, Hilary, to the list. Here is her story. She was born with a brittle bone disease, Osteogenesis Imperfecta, on December 27, 1972. I didn't find out until after her death that she wasn't expected to live past puberty. She passed away on May 16, 2006, at the age of 33. She was my oldest child.

She was very tiny and used a motorized wheelchair. She graduated with honors from college, and taught special education for 3 years. She got married on August 19, 2001 and was very happy.

On February 6, 2006 she was admitted to the hospital with respiratory problems and severe fatigue. It was discovered she had a kidney stone that was about the size of her kidney. They thought at first that was what was causing her breathing problems. She was so small and had such severe scoliosis that the enlarged kidney was pressing up on her lung. They eventually decided she had pneumonia. Within a week she was moved to ICU and intubated. She was extubated and intubated another 3 times over the course of the next 5 weeks, after which she was transferred to another hospital for a specialist to see her in regards to removing her kidney. He took one look at her and her tiny frame and skeletal problems and said surgery would be too dangerous. She was then discharged and came home on oxygen, to her in-laws home where she and her DH were living at the time.

Approximately, 2 1/2 weeks later, her mother-in-law found her unresponsive after increasing confusion during the day. 911 was called and she was admitted to ICU and again placed on the ventilator where she remained for the next seven weeks. During these 2 hospitalizations, she endured many complications such as pulmonary edema caused by being given too many IV fluids and blood transfusions after accidentally receiving too much of a blood thinner, which caused a bladder hemorrhage. She was in severe pain and was on a Fentanyl patch. Her blood pressure was elevated and required medication. She had periods of severe confusion, which we later found was due to the build-up of CO2 in her system. Both lungs collapsed, necessitating the insertion of chest tubes. Many other complications too numerous to state.

She finally came off the ventilator the Friday before Mother's Day and was doing well. It was a wonderful Mother's Day present! She was expected at that point to again recover enough to go home, with the addition of oxygen. However, the next day, Monday, her DH was informed that he had a tough decision to make. They said she was taking in enough O2, but just couldn't get rid of the CO2. She either needed to go back on the ventilator and would never be able to come off, or he could let her go. He knew she wouldn't want to live like that. She was conscious the majority of the time during these hospitalizations and had apparently communicated her wishes in the event a choice had to be made. She passed away the next evening. Her tiny, frail body just couldn't go anymore.

She was my first-born. I had her young and we grew up together. My DH was her step-father, who I married when she was 10. She called him by his first name, but talked of him as her dad. He was the best father she could have had. Her siblings are DS (21 when she passed) and DD (14 at the time). Even with the huge age difference, they were all very close.

I love her so much and miss her every day!

Long story, yet so little said about such a wonderful, inspirational person!
Debbie ~~Vegetarian WDW lover!~~

Last edited by CDoobee; 11-14-2008 at 04:44 PM.
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Old 11-14-2008, 07:12 PM   #4
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Please add my Mom, Betty.
She just recently passed away from lung cancer (Oct 10th). She was dx'd with it in June/July 1999. She was a fighter.. she had a strong will and was determinded to beat the odds & she did. She was given a year to live back then.. she beat the odds by many many years. We are greatful for the many extra years we had with her She was 78 years old when she passed away.
RIP Lightning 9/20/2007
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Old 11-15-2008, 10:09 PM   #5
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Hugs to A Mickeyfan and CDoobee
and thanks for starting this thread, safetymom.

Please add my nephew, Lee.

One day when his kids were still preschoolers, my brother came home to a note from his wife on the table that said he needed to pick up DD and his son, Lee from day care. The note added that he would need to do that every day from then on, because his wife was leaving and didn't want the kids. So, my brother became a single parent, with his ex-wife coming in and out of the children's lives.
Through his childhood, Lee kept believing in promises his mom made, even though she kept breaking them. His younger sister was more practical and said she would not count on anything with her mom unless she actually saw her mom. Lee kept believing in the promised Halloween costumes, Christmas gifts and a promise of a trip to WDW by his mom. None of that ever materialized and Lee's dad, his sister and the rest of his extended family kept picking up the pieces.
Every year while Lee and his sister were small and through Middle School, DH and I had a cousin's New Year's Eve for our children and their cousins. It was a lot of fun and all the kids stayed up til midnight, when we went out and lit sparklers and wished each other a HAPPY NEW Year. Each year, Lee would tell us something his mom had planned to do with him and that he knew she would do it this year because she promised. We have many happy memories of those NYE parties and I am happy that we were able to bring some joy into Lee's life.

Fast Forward to 1995. Lee had graduated from high school and was not sure what to do with his life. My father died of cancer in the Spring of that year. Lee had been very close to him and was named for him. Lee said afterwards that it was very strange to sit in a memorial service and hear his own name (which he shared with his grandfather) mentioned over and over.
Young Lee was a handsome young man; although he hadn't planned exactly what to do with his life, he had signed up for the military and had gone thru some kind of a pre-training thing while he was a senior in high school, with a promise that once he graduated, he would receive the assignment/training of his choice. As it turned out, that was one more broken promise and he was released from his military sign up because of that.
Then one day in November of 1995, we got a phone call that Lee was dead. He had been shot.
And then we got even more shocking news; he had shot himself.
His funeral was one of the saddest I have ever been to.
A young man with everything ahead of him and everything to live for who could not see those things and could see only one way out.

His sister told me later that the cousin NYE parties were a highlight of their lives and that Lee had even talked about them not long before he killed himself. I am sad, but happy when I think of that. And, as sad as I am at this time of year, it is nothing to the grief of my brother and his daughter.

So, remember all those who are stuck in despair and can't find their way out.
Help if you can.
SueM in MN
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Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans......John Lennon
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trip report link in Memory of eternaldisneyfan, who lived these words: Some people are always grumbling because roses have thorns. I am thankful that thorns have roses. Alphonse Karr

Last edited by SueM in MN; 11-15-2008 at 11:16 PM. Reason: spelling
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Old 11-15-2008, 10:41 PM   #6
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My late (first) husband Michael...

We were a happy, typical suburban family in New Hampshire. Married 20 years, two daughters in their teens, a minivan and a doggie. We loved our DVC and WDW vacations. Celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary on board DCL with our daughters....little did we know the horror to come only six months after that..

I awoke that beautiful Sunday morning in September full of happiness and dreaming of what life was to bring us. There was so much promise and hope for the future. But by early evening a massive heart attack claimed the life of my 50 year old husband. I was present, and my oldest daughter walked in to view the scene as well. It is something that one never forgets. But we choose to remember the wonderful, happy times with a man who was a loving father and husband. In retrospect, one sometimes does not appreciate how good life is..until it is gone in an instant.

So please take a moment to remember Michael with us, and also remember all the loving souls that are mentioned here on this thread. Thank you Safetymom...I know you understand.
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Old 11-16-2008, 07:31 AM   #7
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Please add my mom, Leila, to the list. She passed away from small cell lung cancer two years ago. However with the holidays coming and I have had two new grandchildren born (with a third on its way) that she would have loved I miss her like it was yesterday. I am so sad but I know she would not want that.
She was a strong woman who always put others first. She was my best friend. We would talk on the phone 2-3 times a day. Sometimes I dial her number just to see if the phone company has given that number out yet and they haven't.
Thank you!
2007- POR
2007-DL Paradise Pier
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2006-POR 2005-POR 2005- DL Paradise Pier 1999-Dixie Landings (1st of many trips-I hope!) 1999- DL Holiday Inn and many more DL trips
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Old 11-16-2008, 02:12 PM   #8
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Hi...Please add my DH to the list, he passed away suddenly on July 12, 2008 after a 5 year battle with colon cancer. Hew was 49 years old and left behind DW (me) and two beautiful DD's 16 & 8.

Port Orleans french Quarter 12/2009 Saratoga Springs "HOME" 7/2009 PopCentury 7/2009 Vero Beach 10/2008 Vero Beach 8/2008 Saratoga Springs "HOME" 8/2008 Saratoga Springs "HOME" 8/2007 Saratoga Springs "HOME" 7/2006 Old Key West 2/2006 Boardwalk Villas 12/2005 Saratoga Springs "HOME" 12/2005 Vero Beach 7/2005 Disney Wonder 1/2005Saratoga Springs "HOME" 1/2005 Caribbean Beach 2/2004 Coronado Springs 10/2003 Country Inn Suites - Int'l Drive - Honeymoon 2/1996 1974 - 1996 lived in Orlando & Ft Lauderdale - went so many times I lost count!

My Beloved Husband R.I.P.
**I miss you baby** 3/7/59 - 7/12/08
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Old 11-17-2008, 12:40 PM   #9
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Please add DH Roger who died aged 54 from colon cancer in August 2006. He leaves me, and DD (26) and DS (24).
Christmas was always a magical time for us because we used to have the traditional family day followed by leaving for WDW on the 26th. Since then we cannot bring ourselves to return as the memories are just too painful.
Roger battled bravely for 3 years after his first diagnosis, always staying cheerful and positive, and never let his spirit wane. I always descibe Roger as the glue which bound us together, and for a while after he died we came unstuck, but we have worked hard to get ourselves back on track. Two weeks ago DS married, and it was hard thinking that Roger would never be present at this or any other happy event, and my daughter who was a bridesmaid shed a few tears when Roger was mentioned in the ceremony. You move on, but you never forget.
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Old 11-17-2008, 01:50 PM   #10
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I remember this from last year and it was such a nice tribute. Please add two very important ladies from my life:

My mother - Mary Ellen Cheney who I lost in October of 1997 to lung cancer.

My grandmother - Marie Rile who I lost in October of 1988.

to all who are missing loved ones this holiday season.
Mary My first visits: WDW '76 DL '79 DCL '99 DVC '00
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Old 11-17-2008, 03:15 PM   #11
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Please add my husband, Mat, to the list. Mat passed away on July 7, 2008 after a nine month battle with pancreatic cancer. He was 55 years old and his memorial service was on our 34th wedding anniversary (July 12th). We have one son, Michael, age 21. Michael and I miss Mat very much. There are no words to describe the loss.

Thank you.
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Old 11-23-2008, 02:28 PM   #12
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Old 11-24-2008, 09:48 AM   #13
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Please add my parents Nancy and Risden Lyle and my brother Risden Graham. They all had rough lives but I still love and miss them.
Also add my MIL Pilkie. She was my husband's step mother but she brought him up to be the most wonder man. She died of heart failure after 4 years in a nursing home.

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Old 11-30-2008, 04:24 PM   #14
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Old 11-30-2008, 05:25 PM   #15
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Please add my DH James who passed away from lung cancer. He was a wonderful husband & father and he worked tirelessly with the homeless & mentally ill. We have 3 wonderful children who are now 22,20 & 13yrs. It's been a very tough 5 yrs without him & I miss him everyday. December is particularly rough because of Christmas, my birthday & our wedding anniversay. He was truly the love of my life.
Please add my parents too. Eileen & William were wonderful parents to my sister, brother & me.
Thank you for doing this for everyone.
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