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Old 01-14-2009, 08:32 PM   #151
Elfstar
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Thank you all, again . I'm starting to feel a little better, partly due to knowing Jim's not suffering anymore, partly from getting some rest - I can't believe that this journey that flew by was over a year long. And my daughter let me know a few days ago that we're expecting a new life - our first grandchild. I can only hope that Jim knows, too! Oh my God, I miss him!!!! This will be a year of recovery, a year of firsts (without him... ) and a year of renewal. I'll still be here, gratefully accepting your encouragement and support, and giving mine back to all of you who need it. This board was, and still is, a godsend!

God bless us all for helping each other!
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When life gets tough, we go to WDW!!
1991 - CBR ; 1995, '99, 2004 - Off site
2005 - July 3 - 6 off site, 7 - 10 POFQ
2006 - 3 trips this year - all Disney'd out for now.
2007 - another wonderful week at WDW (off site)
2008 - the saddest year of my life - DH has ALS; AKL for his final trip.
2009 - DH passed on 1/3 - "memory trip" 3/5 - 3/9 with his daughter.
Memory trip 6/28 - 7/4 POFQ - first solo trip, a little rough
F & W Festival trip - 9/24 - 9/29 with sister-in-law - AKL
2010 - 6/19-25, DTD hotel - carried DH in my heart, had a lovely trip!
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Old 01-14-2009, 09:26 PM   #152
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Elfstar! What wonderful news in the midst of missing Jim.
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Old 01-16-2009, 07:03 AM   #153
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Elfstar, your spiritual strength is evident in all your postings. You persevered through a great trial, and were an inspirational example to others. I am thankful you are getting needed rest. And a grandchild-what a blessing! When our first grandchild was born (we have three so far,) I experienced a new kind of love that was so wonderful. God is great!
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Old 01-16-2009, 08:58 AM   #154
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Elfstar View Post
TAnd my daughter let me know a few days ago that we're expecting a new life - our first grandchild. I can only hope that Jim knows, too!
God bless us all for helping each other!
Congratulations on the new grandchild. I know it is bittersweet and it will be difficult for you as you experience all the firsts w/o Jim. But, the new life that will bless your family will provide much needed comfort and solace to you. After my Dad passed away, my sisters kids were one of the main things that helped my Mom get through it. My thoughts and prayers are with you as you go through this new year.
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Old 01-24-2009, 10:59 PM   #155
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I can't believe Jim's been gone three weeks already. It seems like a bad dream, and I keep wishing I'd wake up. I'm keeping busy but it's just hard to function sometimes....it feels so odd not to be taking care of him.

His daughter and I are going to WDW March 5th through 9th for a "memory trip" - we decided it would be easier if we went back the first time together. He and I went many times, he and Sherry went together once but the three of us were never there together, so I'll share my memories with her and she with me. We've booked a room in the French Quarter; I'll go back to AKL in the Fall for my solo memory trip.

Oh, and our first grandchild is due September 1st courtesy of my daughter! When she first found out, she was so excited she forgot to ask her due date!
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When life gets tough, we go to WDW!!
1991 - CBR ; 1995, '99, 2004 - Off site
2005 - July 3 - 6 off site, 7 - 10 POFQ
2006 - 3 trips this year - all Disney'd out for now.
2007 - another wonderful week at WDW (off site)
2008 - the saddest year of my life - DH has ALS; AKL for his final trip.
2009 - DH passed on 1/3 - "memory trip" 3/5 - 3/9 with his daughter.
Memory trip 6/28 - 7/4 POFQ - first solo trip, a little rough
F & W Festival trip - 9/24 - 9/29 with sister-in-law - AKL
2010 - 6/19-25, DTD hotel - carried DH in my heart, had a lovely trip!
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Old 01-25-2009, 06:54 AM   #156
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Congratulations! I believe that Jim will watch over your daughter the next months and smile from above when the baby is born.

You have shown such strength and I can only hope I can be as strong as you.
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Old 01-25-2009, 08:16 PM   #157
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I'm sorry for your loss.You are in my prayers.
And congrats on the good news.
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Old 02-09-2009, 10:08 AM   #158
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I just found this board today, and have read through all your posts. I am so sorry for everything your darling Jim, you, and your family have gone through, and for the loss of Jim. You are an amazing woman, a hero in my eyes, so courageous, and so caring to others. Thank you for reminding me to be grateful for everything I have, and to treat every day as if it might be my or my loved ones last. Congrats on the upcoming birth of your grandchild!
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Old 02-09-2009, 09:42 PM   #159
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Thanks, TeresaNJ, I'm just grateful I was there to help him through it. I have had a lot of experience with death, both personally and professionally but this is something different than I've ever experienced before - to watch a human being, someone I love so much, face his own death and progress to that end. I started seeing a Hospice grief counselor today because I currently feel "nothing" - apparently I'm just in a "numb" state which is a protective mechanism that will last as long as my (brain? subconscious?) thinks I need it. She also told me that I will never be the same person I was before all this, that I'll have to find a new "normal". This is something that I've never heard before but it does make sense - no one could have an experience like this and not be changed somehow.
__________________
When life gets tough, we go to WDW!!
1991 - CBR ; 1995, '99, 2004 - Off site
2005 - July 3 - 6 off site, 7 - 10 POFQ
2006 - 3 trips this year - all Disney'd out for now.
2007 - another wonderful week at WDW (off site)
2008 - the saddest year of my life - DH has ALS; AKL for his final trip.
2009 - DH passed on 1/3 - "memory trip" 3/5 - 3/9 with his daughter.
Memory trip 6/28 - 7/4 POFQ - first solo trip, a little rough
F & W Festival trip - 9/24 - 9/29 with sister-in-law - AKL
2010 - 6/19-25, DTD hotel - carried DH in my heart, had a lovely trip!
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Old 03-18-2009, 10:45 PM   #160
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Thought I'd post a little "trip report" about Sherry's and my trip in memory of Jim. Obviously, there were mixed emotions - it was so odd being there without him - we both felt it - but as we started touring the parks, and telling each other what we'd done with Jim when we were here, and here, and here, we started relaxing and enjoying ourselves. A high and low point was reached at Epcot - Sherry and Jim had done a "leave a legacy" a couple of years ago - she'd forgotten her locator so we went to the photoshop to see if they could help - they have every location on file - and when I asked, they were able to print the original photograph that was used to make the legacy plate. It was so great to see him healthy - before the disintegration ALS had put him through - that I just burst into tears. The photo shop staff was wonderful, we explained what we were doing and they were so encouraging and supportive. The rest of the trip was calmer - we went everywhere he loved, went on most of his favorite rides (I cracked a rib a week before the trip and decided that Rock "n Roller Coaster probably wasn't a great idea temporarily), ate at all of his favorite restaurants (Sherry had never been to breakfast at the Crystal Palace before!) and the last day, without even thinking, we ended up at the pick-a-pearl stall in Downtown Disney. We each found beautiful pearls and had necklaces made to commemorate our trip. Sherry and I have always enjoyed each other's company but had never spent any one to one time together before - this was a very special trip in that respect also. And she's excited that she's becoming an aunt (by my daughter - her bonus sister) and can't wait to knit something special for the baby.

So, another step achieved, and more to come. I'm still seeing the Hospice grief counselor again next Monday - I can't seem to move past the anger phase - I bet I'll always be angry about this loss from this miserable disease.
__________________
When life gets tough, we go to WDW!!
1991 - CBR ; 1995, '99, 2004 - Off site
2005 - July 3 - 6 off site, 7 - 10 POFQ
2006 - 3 trips this year - all Disney'd out for now.
2007 - another wonderful week at WDW (off site)
2008 - the saddest year of my life - DH has ALS; AKL for his final trip.
2009 - DH passed on 1/3 - "memory trip" 3/5 - 3/9 with his daughter.
Memory trip 6/28 - 7/4 POFQ - first solo trip, a little rough
F & W Festival trip - 9/24 - 9/29 with sister-in-law - AKL
2010 - 6/19-25, DTD hotel - carried DH in my heart, had a lovely trip!
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Old 03-18-2009, 10:56 PM   #161
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I am so glad you trip went well and you made even more memories!
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Old 03-20-2009, 10:18 AM   #162
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This post brings back lots of memories for me. I lost my mother to ALS when I was 18 years old, she was 46. She had it for 5 years before passing.

It's been 15 years since, and I miss her more than ever now that I'm older and have a family of my own.

I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
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Old 03-23-2009, 07:49 PM   #163
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Quote:
Originally Posted by two*little*birds View Post
This post brings back lots of memories for me. I lost my mother to ALS when I was 18 years old, she was 46. She had it for 5 years before passing.

It's been 15 years since, and I miss her more than ever now that I'm older and have a family of my own.

I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that at such a young age - I'm sure you were a joy and a help to your mom. I'll keep you in my prayers, too. And thank you for your prayers for us. It was such a short road for Jim - thank goodness for his sake as he hated what ALS did to him. It still seems like it's not real to me sometimes - it's hard to believe he's gone, even though I was there with him the whole time.
__________________
When life gets tough, we go to WDW!!
1991 - CBR ; 1995, '99, 2004 - Off site
2005 - July 3 - 6 off site, 7 - 10 POFQ
2006 - 3 trips this year - all Disney'd out for now.
2007 - another wonderful week at WDW (off site)
2008 - the saddest year of my life - DH has ALS; AKL for his final trip.
2009 - DH passed on 1/3 - "memory trip" 3/5 - 3/9 with his daughter.
Memory trip 6/28 - 7/4 POFQ - first solo trip, a little rough
F & W Festival trip - 9/24 - 9/29 with sister-in-law - AKL
2010 - 6/19-25, DTD hotel - carried DH in my heart, had a lovely trip!
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Old 05-17-2009, 08:50 AM   #164
Elfstar
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Jim's Birthday is coming up

Jim's birthday will be here in a few weeks - all these firsts are a challenge. I woke up Monday morning and found his favorite cat had passed away during the night - he'd seemed fine the evening before. I hope they're together now.

I'm pulling life together, mainly to keep occupied but it is getting easier - I just miss him terribly. To all of you fighting a disease with your loved ones, please know I'm sending you my strength just as you all did for me when I needed it most!
__________________
When life gets tough, we go to WDW!!
1991 - CBR ; 1995, '99, 2004 - Off site
2005 - July 3 - 6 off site, 7 - 10 POFQ
2006 - 3 trips this year - all Disney'd out for now.
2007 - another wonderful week at WDW (off site)
2008 - the saddest year of my life - DH has ALS; AKL for his final trip.
2009 - DH passed on 1/3 - "memory trip" 3/5 - 3/9 with his daughter.
Memory trip 6/28 - 7/4 POFQ - first solo trip, a little rough
F & W Festival trip - 9/24 - 9/29 with sister-in-law - AKL
2010 - 6/19-25, DTD hotel - carried DH in my heart, had a lovely trip!
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Old 05-17-2009, 09:11 AM   #165
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Keep going with the therapy elfstar. It seemed to be the only thing that has helped my mother. Unfortunately I just started seeing a therapist. No one helped me with my greif and loss (I was the "adult" daughter with a husband to lean on, so apparently they thought I didn't need it). Friday has been two years since my father passed away. I still don't WANT to believe it. If you ever feel like you HAVE to be strong about it, don't. Let everything out and take time with yourself and your emotions...that's one of the biggest mistakes I made was pushing myself an pushing the emotions aside. I hope that over time things get better for you, and your memory trip sounds wonderful.
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