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Old 05-02-2006, 11:26 AM   #46
Alice28
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Subscribing! Can't wait to hear more!
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Old 05-02-2006, 02:47 PM   #47
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Subscribing! Can't wait to hear more!
AGREED!
Between waiting for this continuing thread, and the sequel to "The DaVinici Code"...I'm gonna BUST!
Really...Your trip reports are one of my all time favorites.....It cant be my all time favorite UNTIL it is completed!
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Old 05-03-2006, 01:06 AM   #48
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Just subscribing
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Old 05-03-2006, 09:35 AM   #49
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Thanks for the report. Enjoying the humorous writing.
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Old 05-04-2006, 05:32 AM   #50
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This report is really great! I too spend most of my first day wandering lost halls, but never lost cars!
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Old 05-05-2006, 05:37 PM   #51
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I'm definately subscribing to this. I just found the trips reports board today and have been absolutely addicted to reading about everyone's trips. (Er, I've read about 2 so far, but the addiction's there, I assure you.) It's really getting me hyped about going to disney this summer, as well as earning some money to drag a never-been friend down here.
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Old 05-05-2006, 07:48 PM   #52
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Subscribing! Please don't leave us hanging, what happens next??

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Old 05-06-2006, 07:04 AM   #53
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The Van Halen song "Running with the Devil" was about my parakeet!
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Hey, thanks everyone!

I've been away this week on travel for work. I was thisclose to Disneyland...okay, maybe about 4 hours away...but I was sooooooo tempted to drive down there. What's Disneyland like in mid July, anyway?

DisUnc, you're too kind. I actually have up to Day 9 written, but I'm trying to stall with posting these in case I "catch up" to my unwritten days. This bugger is taking a long time to write. Much longer than my last trip report.

Alright, on that note...
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Old 05-06-2006, 07:18 AM   #54
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Part 2. When I grow up, I wanna be a fruit bat. --Dan

After Donald’s Disappointosauras, Pal Mickey and I wait for Dan to have his cigarette. “Say Pal, d-don’t you think we should get going to Dinosaur? Nope, there’s nothing to see here!” I look up and see another family is in the smoking section and – wouldn’t you know it – they have a NEW Pal Mickey, one that doesn’t talk about obsolete attractions. I walk over to the little boy and we compare Mickeys. Mine is smaller and dirtier. We both press their bellies. The new one is definitely louder. Listen, the new one tells bad puns too, if you can believe that. Dan finishes his smoke and walks over to the dueling Pal Mickeys. While mine is clearly older, outdated, and has less features, it has so much sentimental value. I hold Mickey close to me and tell him he could never be replaced (except maybe his chip).

We head over to Dinosaur, Dan’s favorite attraction in the park. When the ride ends, we scramble out of the vehicle to check out our photo. I have a wildly surprised expression and point in the exact opposite direction of the dinosaur. But Dan is casually looking up like he spotted something mildly interesting. I was very disappointed that Dan didn’t “act” for the camera at all. “I forgot when they took the picture,” he admits. I tell him he has some serious making up to do for that! (Foreshadowing warning)

The soon-to-be-buh-bye Tarzan Rocks is around the corner, but I’m more interested in checking out Expedition Everest. We are soon confronted by a friendly but lonely cast member who tells us the path is closed because falling construction is coming dangerously close to the guests.


Ahh, back in the construction days. Yep, my trip report is THAT old.


Snap snap, Dan takes a few pictures while the cast member chats on and on about the ride. Dude, you’re not telling me anything I don’t know…I’m a DISboard member. After Dan takes his pictures, he walks up to us and asks him, “Gotta Roo pin?”

We take the Wildlife Express Train over to Rafiki’s Planet Watch. Never been here before, but I hear it sucks, so my expectations are low. As soon as we enter the Conservation Station, Dan is eyeing Pocahontas. “Get in line; I want to get your picture with her.”

He’s not fooling me; the drooling is giving away his thoughts…he wants me to stand next to her so he can dream up all sorts of X-rated images of the two of us. “Lean in a little closer, no a little more…that’s better…now why don’t you give her a kiss?” Oh Dan! Just take the bloody picture.


Me and Poco, not close enough for Dan's comfort


In the meanwhile I have a nice chat with the hot Pocahontas and find out she was in the Fantasmic show from last night and that she’s from Virginia.

“Virginia?” Dan asks me as we walk away. But I don’t think he’s listening, because at this point he’s staring at the camera screen, admiring the photo of us longer than he should have.

Around the corner is a bunch of hands-on stuff and a CM who is desperately trying to convince a teenager to put his hand in the spider hole. The kid starts to, but freaks out and leaves. The CM taunts him as he walks away. He sees me laughing at the teenager and turns to me. “What about you, ma’am?” he asks. (Crap, I hate to be called ma’am…and when exactly did the jump from miss to ma’am happen, anyway?)

Fake or not, I won’t go near that stupid hole. So I tell Dan to. Eventually, with much coaxing from the CM and me, Dan sticks his hand in a bit. “All the way! All the way!” The CM urges him. Dan extends his arm through the hole. Then he jerks his hand back and yells like something bit him. He isn’t fooling me; I’ve been married to him too long. But I was curious what was back there. “Nothing,” he says as we walk away from the exhibit. “The spider we see in the hole is an illusion.” I look at the CM, who’s grinning at us like he just shared a big secret.

We walk around the Conservation building and I’m glad that I had low expectations, because it isn’t as bad as I thought and I’m pleasantly surprised. Some interesting stuff on display here, it’s just too bad there wasn’t a scheduled surgery. No matter, it’s bathroom break time!

Why am I excited about going to the bathroom? And why do I feel the need to include it in my report? Not because I have any unusual fetishes. It’s because I found out that this is no ordinary bathroom, folks. If you have the time, step inside. First, there are animal noises piped into the room, like lions and chimpanzees and giraffes. Okay, kidding about the giraffes. But it’s rather amusing to hear a low growl outside the stall while your pants are around your ankles.

The second great thing about this bathroom is the animal poop fact sheet in the stalls. That’s right, poop facts. Like, did you know the elephant, pound per pound, produces the most poop of any other mammal, or that the hippo spins his tail around while he’s pooping to spread it around? Not kidding. Just some light reading while you’re excreting your own poop. Those imagineers are so clever.

So, I’m in the stall and doing my thing and reading the animal poop fact sheet when suddenly I hear an elephant trumpet in the room. “Oh, excuse me!” says a lady in the next stall.

Later I let Dan feed and pet the farm animals at the Affection Section before getting back on the train toward Africa.

So we decide to hit the Maharajah Jungle Trek for some exotic animal viewing. Very cool, lots of great animals like the tigers and Komodo dragon.

But the fruit bats require a special mention.

Initially Dan and I were interested in the fruit bats in general…I mean, they are pretty cool. The CM came over to talk to us about them, and it was all very interesting and everything. But then we spotted one boy bat in particular (yep, we’re sure it was a boy). He was upside down on a branch and cleaning himself. And what I mean by cleaning is…um…he was cleaning one appendage in particular. And this appendage was, well…proportionally impressive. As an added bonus, he could make this particularly oversized appendage expand and contract at will. He was spending a long time cleaning this area. It was rather difficult to look away; this bat had a lot to be proud of. None of the other guests seemed to notice this natural phenomenon (or perhaps weren’t as impressed), since they moved on to the next batch of animals. But Dan and I held back, mesmerized by his performance. Not even my chatty Pal said a word the entire time. Finally I asked the CM if he saw what was going on in that cage. He chuckled and said, “Yep, they do that.”

And yes, that was the most memorable part of the Maharajah Jungle Trek.

(Sorry folks, we didn’t get a picture of the World’s eighth wonder..."Dan, why don't you stand next to the bat...a little closer...a little closer...there! Now, let's compare you two and see who measures up.")

Soon afterward, it was time to head back to the room. One thing I have to note…if you’ve never been inside the Shades of Green, the floor layout to your room is almost as confusing as finding the restaurants. The hallways bend a lot, so you have to go around several corners to get to your room. Because of these corners, you never know when someone is just ahead of you. I suppose this helps to cut down on the noise (this is one QUIET resort). Just before we rounded one of the corners we heard two people talking about the ant situation in the resort. When we came around the corner, we saw a manager and a housekeeping lady chatting. The manager looks up suddenly like she didn’t hear us coming and gives me a big smile. “Oh hello!” she says, a little too cheery. Like, “We weren’t talking about an ant problem at all!”


Next installment: Dan, do you get the feeling that everyone is staring at us?

Last edited by hucifer; 05-06-2006 at 07:28 AM.
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Old 05-06-2006, 07:29 AM   #55
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You know why the fruit bat does that?












Because he can.
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Old 05-06-2006, 07:46 AM   #56
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Glad I'm not the only one that can't look away from the antics of the fruit bat. DF says my facination is unnatural. I think he's jealous.
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Old 05-06-2006, 07:45 PM   #57
DISUNC
I cried like a baby watching the last 3 minutes of "The Way We Were"
3 bottles of Soda, A Xtra large Cheese doodles & a plunger! Someone is having a Party...Can I come?
AGGGGGGGH I am Ruined!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hucifer
Hey, thanks everyone! ...
You are most certainly welcome!

Quote:
Originally Posted by hucifer
DisUnc, you're too kind.....
Awe Shucks!

Quote:
Originally Posted by hucifer
I actually have up to Day 9 written.........,.....
Yet you only posted UP to Day 2!!!! tsk tsk. There are names for people who do that!!!! Trip Report Poster Tease!

Quote:
Originally Posted by hucifer
... but I'm trying to stall with posting these in case I "catch up" to my unwritten days. This bugger is taking a long time to write. Much longer than my last trip report.............
YEAH YEAH Blah blah!
With writing wonderful FUNNY trip reports comes GREAT responsibilty to your adoring public! Use you scripting powers wisely , O DisMistress of the Keyboard!

WOW! I didn't know about the bathrooms in AK! Usually there is NO time for that on my Commando "GRIN & BEAR IT" style Park marches! I must pencil a bathroom break into my next AK visit!

You sort of made it a bit intimidating to go see the fruit bats ! However if I do go see them , I will be sure to schedule the 'viewing' AFTER my bathroom break!!!

We also have the old Pal Mickey...he works really hard in AK, dont he?

Really I can't wait for the rest of the report! Practically PERFECT in everyway (insert much needed poppins umbrella similie here)!!! Thanks!
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Old 05-07-2006, 01:56 AM   #58
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LOL at the fruit bat, having taken our DD out of school for our last trip and the fact that their topic for that term was animals and the environment we were taking loads of piccies in AK, and I had to wait 20 .... yes 20 minutes for (and I bet it was the same guy) the male fruit bat to put his xrated bits away so I could snap a child friendly picture

Loving you report ..... more soon please

Val
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Old 05-08-2006, 06:07 PM   #59
hucifer
The tag that was here was staler than 3 yr old bread crumbs
The Van Halen song "Running with the Devil" was about my parakeet!
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Loubon, that must be a guy thing. If I was that flexible...well, let's just say I wouldn't do anything about it.

I'm surprised that you fellow fruit bat fans are out there. Hey! Such fascinating creatures, huh?

LOL Cinders Mum! He was still going at it when we walked away. I suppose I could have stayed longer but...I think it was making someone feel a little inadequate...

DisUnc, just the bathroom at Rafiki's Planet Watch makes those noises that I know about. And just the women's, for that matter, since I didn't wander into the men's room. ...Great responsibility, aye? Just trying to reel it out, one part at a time. This sucker is taking me months and months to write it so I don't want to catch up too quickly. But yeah, I guess I do like to tease a little.
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Old 05-08-2006, 06:41 PM   #60
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Just for the record, I checked with my CM friend who works at AK and they said there is no such thing as a bathroom that makes special sounds. So that means what you heard was from the lady in the stall next to you.

(Admit it....Dan would like me if he met me.)
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