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Old 03-19-2013, 10:35 AM   #16
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I agree that trying to match touring styles might not turn out so well and a meal together once a day would be the best way to spend time together without dragging each other down during the day. May I also throw in the suggestion that not all get together meals have to be ADR. Maybe if you're both up for it you can meet up for a CS lunch/dinner. Maybe grab you're food and watch a parade or fireworks together, if that's possible. That way there's no pressure about keeping a specific reservation.
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Old 03-19-2013, 11:00 AM   #17
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Originally Posted by DakotaRose View Post
I mean this kindly: take a breath and ask why you really want them to share this trip, your first to WDW. If they aren't enthused, go enjoy it with your family and give them a rain check for another time. With your very different styles, perhaps a different kind of trip would be easier to enjoy together, for both families.
They are enthused about Disney (this will be at least their second trip), but there are other factors involved that we just have different park strategies and styles. I know last year they went during the end of June beginning of July for 8 days, so I wonder if maybe that is why they did such short time/trips in the park (huge crowds and the other factors involved).

Both families are really good friends and have been for a couple of years. Heck, there are times I think they have visitation rights every other weekend with one of my children. Our kids have gone to school together for like 4 years and we all get along really good. I have had their child stay with me while they have both had to be out of town, etc.

We have tried to do a trip before, but ended up having to cancel because the one parent or the other ended up getting called into work unexpectedly.
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Old 03-19-2013, 11:22 AM   #18
but I'm sort of attached to it
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My family is like your friend's family, for various reasons. I would plan to meet up for meals only, or meals and an attraction or two.

I mean this is the nicest way possible, your family would wear us out, and fast. My DD has some special needs (HFA) and she simply can't go, go, go. She refuses anything remotely scary or kind of tall. And when she is tired, its over. Period.

Your family and their family are not compatible touring partners unless you are very honest with each other about how you will be touring and plan to meet up sometimes.

You will be bored and feel like you are missing something, and they will be overwhelmed and overstimulated.
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Off Site: Visiting the grandparents in the 80s - June 2000 - Honeymoon (POFQ) - June 2007 - DD's 1st trip (ASM)June 2010 - We're getting divorced and going anyway (CBR)

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Old 03-19-2013, 11:35 AM   #19
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Originally Posted by cobright View Post
Okay, since you asked...

Planning your "must Do's" in advance is a must and after that it's just filling in the rest of the spaces on the schedule. Follow me on this...

You know your kids. You know how long they can go at a stretch. Place a relaxer-ride at those intervals. I'm in Michigan and we go to Cedar Point like you said and this is a much different park experience. Ticking rides off a checklist will have you missing so much at WDW.

Relaxer rides are worthy and entertaining things that last 10-15 minutes or more; sometimes they are air-conditioned.

Now put a sit-down meal on the list for every day in the park. Preferably a character dining experience. I love character hunting so I end up bribing the kids to stand the lines but character meals lure them in with food.

Stay hydrated. Plan for all the things that might deter your progress. Tylanol, Tums, diareah meds, baby-wipes, extra water, etc.

Finally, and this is not for everyone, but every team in every battle needs a leader. That leader is you and you owe it to your family to be at the top of your game.

For me, that means I pre-load at breakfast and every meal a regimen of Ibuprofin, bacon, amphetemines, and high-proof clear liquor. I consider them all essential but if you must cut some of them at least keep the bacon and Ibuprofin. Motrin will keep your feet feeling fine and bacon ... well it's bacon.

Once you get started, remember to make sure everyone gets a serving of fruit with each meal, a cup of coffee with any large dose of carbs, and you can all sleep when you're dead.
I say this every time!
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Old 03-19-2013, 11:40 AM   #20
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I went to DLR with a group of my dancers and some parents. We would all eat breakfast together at the hotel and the leave for the parks. Once at the parks we just naturally split off into groups. We would meet for lunch and sometimes the kids would switch groups. We would meet for fireworks and then head back to the hotel together. This worked very well for our group as we had one pregnant lady who couldn't ride as much and didn't want to walk as much. My mother who isn't big into rides and likes to go at a relaxed pace joined her with the two youngest kids in the group and kinda just followed the lead of the kiddos. The two teenagers took off with another mother and oddly enough spent the bulk of their time doing character meetings. My husband and I took the two kids we know the best and our group ended up being a very fast paced group who tried to get in as many rides as possible.
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Old 03-19-2013, 11:41 AM   #21
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op, I wouldn't do it. It is difficult even with groups more evenly matched. You owe it to your family to do Disney at your pace. Chances are great that you will miss a lot of great stuff or they will be miserable. If your family were WDW vets I' d be more inclined to say go for it, but I think your plans are more suitable to a beach vacation not Disney.
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Old 03-19-2013, 12:34 PM   #22
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I agree with two pieces of advice already offered.

1. Reconsider before you commit. It seems like you're very good friends. But you don't seem very excited about spending your first trip to Disney World with them. It's a lot of money to spend to not have the vacation you want. Things that happen on the vacation could also negatively affect your friendship.

Two years ago we invited my brother-in-law and his family on my husband's birthday trip which coincided with the first Star Wars Weekend and with the opening of the new Star Tours ride. It was a dream vacation for my husband, a Star Wars enthusiast. And to be able to share with his brother-well that was just going to be the cherry on the cake. But it turns out that my sister-in-law's one of those Floridians who always complains about the heat, and my brother-in-law liked to rush through a few things then go back to the hotel. After I, at their request, waited for over an hour to hold a place for their little girl to watch the motorcade, and they just decided to leave, My husband and his brother got into a fight. We parted ways for the rest of the day and had a much better time without them. We were only there for a short two-day trip together, so I can imagine how bad it would be over the course of a week.

2. If you do go, avoid ADRs that require money down. On the same trip with my brother-in-law, we planned to go to the HDDR for my husband's birthday celebration. Because of their fight earlier that day, my brother-in-law said that he and his family would probably not make it. We were going to lose the money we had already paid for he, his wife, and daughter to go. My husband had to explain to his brother how expensive the meal was, and that was the only way he could convince him to go.

Again, this is just a short two-day trip, and we go to Disney World often, so one bad experience really didn't make much of a difference to us. Recently, my sister-in-law suggested that she wants them to go with us for our son's first trip in May. I will probably just suggest that we go together some other time.

Last edited by glassslippergirl; 03-19-2013 at 01:05 PM.
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Old 03-19-2013, 01:14 PM   #23
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A few thoughts frm someone who has gone to WDW many times with extended family:

First, it may not be fair to judge how kids react to non-WDW parks vs. WDW. I'm a good example. At non-WDW parks, especially if it is a pay-per-ride type situation (fairs?) I rarely ride more than one ride. WDW is almost the opposite- we ride almost everything at least once. There are also so many interesting things to see that are not rides- like real gardens, educational displays (Innoventions), interactive water fountains. The food alone is enough to send me running from most amusement parks. Think about/discuss what common interests you share.

If you are dealing with differing endurance levels, then I think offsite is the WRONG choice. I speak form experience. When we stay offsite, there is a TON more pressure to travel together. It is also MUCH harder to get everyone going in the morning. We also had considrabel disagreement about which gorceries to buy. Eveyone wanted somethign different, then we fought when someone took the wrong food! The $14 parking fee alone is reason to travel together. I have seriously found the complete opposite to be far more effective- stay at the best onsite hotel you can afford! If value is where youa re at, that's okay. skip the mods. If you can swing deluxe- do it! Also since you said offsight might be an option- strongly look at the Swan and Dolphin. They offer some pretty good deals, and when it comes to trnasportation- they are equal to a deluxe, for about the price of a mod. You just can't get ME or DDP. Not only will it be much easier for everyone to deal with transportation, but it will also make you feel better about compromises. I have little desire to hang out at uninteresting hotels;they are just a bed. Disney resorts are FUN to explore. The pools, extra amenties, decor...all make hotel time enjoyable.
Ah...I just read back thorugh the posts....if this is your frist trip to WDW, I'd reconsider your plan to go together - at least for this go round. Another option to consider- is to plan to meet up just one or two days- or have your trips overlap by just one or two days. That would reduce the pressure.

Another way approach is to merely splurge on a deluxe resort those one or two days you plan to spend together. A split stay will help you shift gears mentally.

money. Try to avoid committing your money on them. (including a cc hold on anything) If you are going to do prepaid dining, or places that require a cc hold, have them prepay you well in advance. Maybe consider the dining plan. The dining plan is a good way to estimate food costs. Look at what each meal plan offers, then add $ for tips. Don't expect the plan to save much money, but it serves as a good estimate of what food costs are. Also, it serves as a commitment.

Last edited by mickeyluv'r; 03-19-2013 at 01:21 PM.
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Old 03-19-2013, 07:46 PM   #24
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I have 2 words CELL PHONES

I cant believe touring is even a worry, since folks have cell phones. Split up or stay together..then text and meet as you want. When they get tired , they go their own way, when they want to meet up do so.
I agree about staying onsite. this makes coming and going a bit less pressured.

Plan as you want and let them keep up as they want.
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Old 03-19-2013, 10:21 PM   #25
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Do you know that the dad will stay in? In our family my husband is generally (always) the type who stays in, would rather be in and watch sports than socialize and such. However, at Disney he's out all day every day with us at the parks. He's a totally different person at Disney than the rest of the time. Just something to think about in trying to figure this out!
That said, I think planning part of each day together (like make a Lunch ADR or plan on meeting up at a particular location for lunch) might be a good idea, then you're not locked into waiting on them to go in the morning. Then you can see how it goes. with dynamics like you describe I don't see everyone being happy if you try to spend too much time together.
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Old 03-19-2013, 10:55 PM   #26
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My DBinL, DSinL, DN19 and DN5 went with me and my DD15 last April, she had no internet access and therefore wasn't as informed as well as I was the first time my family went, but she did know of a few things that she wanted to do, some from her friends and some from my suggestions. But I basically laid it all out for her, this is what , me and DD15 are going to do, and this is where we are going to eat at this appointed time. So she made her decisions on what she wanted to participate in with us or what they wanted to do on their own. Sometimes when we were touring together, DN5 would want to do this or that, something that I wouldn't want to do or she would have a 5 year old I'm really tired melt down so we would part ways for awhile and then get back together for something else. If you really feel that yours touring styles are going to clash, I would just say no, no way. Disney cost to much money to not be happy while you are there. Regardless of what you do, have fun, don't let anybody hamper your vacation.
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Old 03-19-2013, 11:52 PM   #27
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If you really want to travel with these friends, I might suggest you travel "at the same time" as them rather than "with" them.

I live far away but we go to Disney... a lot. We have taken multiple groups of friends and family through the parks, and this is what I have learned.

1) Stay onsite. The transportation is marvelous in the sense that anyone can go anywhere unaccompanied. No need to coordinate who is taking which vehicle where when. This was a Godsend when I had a friend who just.could.not get going in the morning and we ended up screaming at each other because I was mad that she wasn't ready and she was mad that I didn't want to wait for her. We realized that those who were ready could go - and those who were not could hop the next bus.

2) Pick a select "together" thing or two - then let the rest fall as it may. We did a trip for Marathon weekend - me and my bestie, and her brother and sister-in-law. We also spent time with her (CM) cousin, and the cousin's mom and son. The five of us did the 5k, and we scheduled one meal (LC) with everyone. Aside from that, we would sometimes meet up when agendas allowed, but other times we'd be going totally opposite directions. We also had small goals, like, ride the TTA together, since that is inexplicably a favorite of all of ours, but we had never all done it together. It was easy to fit in on a day we were all at MK.

3) Set expectations... and know your party. Prior to the bus-screaming trip, I sent out a detailed itinerary. I asked my friends what they wanted to do and was told "everything" - so I scheduled "everything." Bus-friend could not hack it, and if I'd thought about it ahead of time, I KNEW that about her. For our Marathon trip, I sent out a very low-pressure email that was essentially an FYI. To BFF's B, SIL and cousin, I explained that BFF and I have a touring pattern we "automatically" fall into and here is how the weekend would likely go for us. I further explained that anyone was welcome to join us, but that I tended to get very cranky if plans change, so to not expect us to bend to everyone's whims. I also set a note in there for "let me know if there's something not on here that you would really like to do together." That trip went off famously, we all had a great time and no one ended up screaming down Main St...

It's hard, though, with it being your first trip. You can't tell the other family how your family will be because you don't know how it will be! I mean this respectfully, but - despite all of the planning, your family will tweak things throughout the week. After a billion trips, I can easily say, "We arrive at DHS 45 minutes prior to scheduled rope drop, we hit abc and xyz, and then we move on to EPCOT." So be cautious about setting too stringent of expectations, and asking others to work around them, because you may want to change them yourselves.

I dunno, I love taking others to WDW but like LaurenT above, I go enough that I am happy to accomodate what others request (within reason) and if I miss something, oh well, I've seen it before and I'll see it again. We skipped AK totally in January, it just didn't work (but B&SIL went one afternoon.) We opted to spend an extra evening at MK with B&SIL, and we took cousin on our next trip. (Yes - cousin is a CM but didn't start going to the parks until we took her with us!!) If it was my first time? I would not have been so laid back about that.
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Old 03-20-2013, 02:48 AM   #28
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Originally Posted by LovesTimone View Post
If I can suggest, meet for meals, and let each family kinda do their own thing. You could do say character breakfast at AK, then head for the safari ride, then break up and each spend some family time. Then plan to meet back at the pool later in the day, or for dinner. Or Meet for lunch that way if someone wants to sleep in they can. or meet for fireworks, or parades. This way you can go go go if you want any they can do what they want without this everyone get the vacation they want.

Have a magical time
Best advice!

Don't force one another to travel a way you or they don't like. Meet up on occasions do a few things together and still have fun your own way!
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Old 03-20-2013, 09:38 AM   #29
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Originally Posted by RedfromNL View Post
Best advice!

Don't force one another to travel a way you or they don't like. Meet up on occasions do a few things together and still have fun your own way!
I agree as well We have met up with friends and when we tried to stay all together for too long it was disastrous. We are go go go-ers and they needed to stop and get a snack or drink every half hour. We are dare devils and they are chickens. Lol. Many rides ended with my kids yelling woohoo and their kids in tears.

The times we enjoyed more was when we would meet up for a meal or a swim after spending most of our day separate.
Me DH DD17 DD13 and DS6

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Old 03-20-2013, 09:48 AM   #30
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I would not do it. Don't share this trip, if you do decide to do not share a house with them. I would pick my own resrt based on my families needs & wants, pick the tickets we feel are best. If you guys meet up for a meal or some park time great if not that is ok too.

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