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Old 02-27-2013, 10:25 PM   #11
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Tacoma WA
Posts: 46,722

I don't understand not doing rehab, either. Maybe it's b/c the initial reason I chose my university was for the PT/OT program they had. I have my issues with western medicine, but I see nothing bad about PT and OT; those things help.

My FIL managed to talk his way into a very challenging cardiac rehab program that he did NOT qualify for at all. It was more for the Bill Clinton type (back when BC had his heart attack and surgery); younger, hale and hearty except for the surgery. FIL was 79 and couldn't walk out of his room, let alone do what they expected him to do. MIL knows that this helped contribute to his death, because it was just too much for him. He should have gone to the short term rehab place, which YES, was a nursing home, done the appropriate level of cardiac rehab, and maybe everything would have been different.

She saw her own husband lie and cheat his way into that program and therefore out of what could have helped him, and she did the exact same thing with herself. I bet TG is still talking about the old lady who did yoga in the hallway. Wonder if they connect it to to the old lady that came back in 1.5 days later, just hours after being sent home, with another stroke, this time the biggest yet. I just wonder...

So anyway, it mystifies me why she is doing that. It's easy to say "she's afraid", "she doesn't want to lose independence", etc. But to think that she would be afraid to go to a short term rehab for a week or two vs driving without ever figuring out why these happened is confusing. Losing independence of being driven somewhere is worse than potentially killing someone? I just don't get it.

Keep your car away from your mom! Yikes!

At least MIL goes to her appointments, she's got that going for her. Alas, that was one of the things that prompted all the car stuff. She wanted to use this shuttle. I said I'd call, and we talked about the wording of the shuttle's paperwork. She decided that I SAID something, when what I said was *reading* something and trying to figure out what it meant. So then she didn't want to do the shuttle. When I figured out what had happened, I called the shuttle, got the real answer, somehow managed to explain it to her with the help of Robert, his brother, and possibly sock puppets. (OK, no sock puppets were used. But if they spoke Korean, they should have been used.)

I got her all squared away with them. Got the first one or two pickups arranged, and I assume she went on them.

Then she called Robert, complaining that when she called they said she gave the wrong name and the number didn't match. Oh but she got a ride to the next appointment, but she wanted me to know.

Uh, OK? What am I supposed to do with that, you know? She didn't tell me exactly what they said, she didn't give me the person's name...I'm supposed to call an incredibly busy senior shuttle dispatch center to ask vague questions that no one will be able to answer?

So...I did nothing. And I'm thinking that "nothing" was the wrong thing to do. I think I was supposed to get to the bottom of it for her. But, you know, if you are talking on the phone and giving your name, and the person isn't understanding might be time to take a step back, know what I mean? She *knows* that she's losing English slowly, the longer FIL is gone. She surrounds herself with other people she speaks Korean with, and refuses to admit that her pronunciation is off. On the phone she won't slow down, especially with strangers.

Anyway, it's really too bad. Doesn't sting as much today talking about it, so that's good. Maybe talking to you, Michele and others, is helping.

Do you know how hard it is to type with an 8 year old's massive noggin resting on your shoulder? Especially when said noggin is larger than the average? (darn Robert and his gorilla genes) Ouchie. I can't really move my right arm except from the wrist onwards. Zoinks.
-molly + robert + eamon (10!!)

DLR '05-'09 found within this link
DLR 7,9,12 2012 Universal Feb '12 DLR Dec '11 and Feb '12

Made weight goal 1yr8m8days after starting...currently working to maintain 85 lb loss thanks to Weight Watchers!
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