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Old 02-10-2013, 11:43 AM   #1066
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Christine, I completely understand what you're saying. DD is NOT a party girl. She stays in every weekend, does not go out except for a birthday party or movies with friends. I worry about that too, but her response is she has no desire to hang out with the pot heads and drunks (her words, not mine). She avoids that scene. Which also worries me that at college she won't be able to. She'll need to learn to hang out with people who are doing those things without being involved herself. I will admit she's like me and has a sarcastic sense of humor, but she would never dream of fighting or instigating any nonsense because, honestly, she's afraid she'd get her butt whooped. I just want her to find a place where she won't feel like an outcast if she doesn't want to party, and can find people who are truly interested in their education. And if she goes to college and becomes a party girl, well I guess I'll deal with that when it happens.
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Old 02-10-2013, 12:03 PM   #1067
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Christine, I completely understand what you're saying. DD is NOT a party girl. She stays in every weekend, does not go out except for a birthday party or movies with friends. I worry about that too, but her response is she has no desire to hang out with the pot heads and drunks (her words, not mine). She avoids that scene. Which also worries me that at college she won't be able to. She'll need to learn to hang out with people who are doing those things without being involved herself. I will admit she's like me and has a sarcastic sense of humor, but she would never dream of fighting or instigating any nonsense because, honestly, she's afraid she'd get her butt whooped. I just want her to find a place where she won't feel like an outcast if she doesn't want to party, and can find people who are truly interested in their education. And if she goes to college and becomes a party girl, well I guess I'll deal with that when it happens.
For my DS it was very hard to find non drinkers and non smokers. He felt like an outcast, more so on weekends as it was a suticase school. He spent many nights alone. My friends DS is at endicott and told if you keep your dorm room closed nobody will bother you if you drink. However he plays lacrosse and up early for practice. He'd be getting up when his 2 drunk roommates were going to bed
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Old 02-10-2013, 12:07 PM   #1068
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I might be wrong about this but I pretty much believe that if you are NOT a "party person" it's probably a good idea to try to go to a larger school. I think some of these smaller schools (5-7K students) make it very hard to find a "place." I know we all envision the great big "football" schools to be party schools (and they are) but there is also such a wide variety of people there that I do believe you can find a place to fit in.

The majority of colleges have a drinking culture but I think if you attend a very diverse, larger school you are going to have an easier time fitting in.
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Old 02-10-2013, 12:22 PM   #1069
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I would love some input on Carnegie Mellon, Purdue, Marquette, University of Iowa and Valparaiso. My son is currently trying to decide between these. He got accepted at all of them, but is still waiting on the financial packages from a couple of them before making his final decision.

On the other hand, I know lots about Augustana since my daughter is a senior there. So if anyone needs info about that, I'm your girl!
I am a Purdue engineering alumni and grew up in and live in Milwaukee. For this list it really depends what your son wants to do as they are all good schools.

I would strongly suggest that you visit all of them in person as you will find each of them to be very different (atmosphere, activities, campus life).

To talk specifically on Purdue, it is a great school and an engineering degree from there will be well though of anywhere (yes I am a bit biased). i would be happy to answer and specific questions - feel free to pm me.
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Old 02-10-2013, 12:29 PM   #1070
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Originally Posted by Christine
I might be wrong about this but I pretty much believe that if you are NOT a "party person" it's probably a good idea to try to go to a larger school. I think some of these smaller schools (5-7K students) make it very hard to find a "place." I know we all envision the great big "football" schools to be party schools (and they are) but there is also such a wide variety of people there that I do believe you can find a place to fit in.

The majority of colleges have a drinking culture but I think if you attend a very diverse, larger school you are going to have an easier time fitting in.
I agree completely! DS is not into partying at all, and has applied to primarily large schools. He's anticipating many more options for things to do and a wider variety of students
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Old 02-10-2013, 12:39 PM   #1071
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Dd is a freshman at Roger Williams University, Bristol RI. It's nickname??? Rager Williams!! Wasn't too happy to see that after she decided to go there. It's a small school, just under 4000 students. She is not a party girl. But she is a theatre major. We have found that most of the theatre kids tend to be less of a partying mentality than other groups.
There is a fairly large amount of 'partying' going on...but if you want to avoid it, you can. It's going to be harder to find your 'niche' at a smaller school, but it can be done.

It's all about the right fit. We were lucky that dd found such a great fit. I'm sure she would have had a fine fit at other schools but this is just about perfect. And the really funny thing??? I forced her to look at RWU. Her older brother had wanted to go there but his dad wouldn't let him. It has a nice theatre program, with a terrific study abroad program for theatre majors. And, it's in a beautiful spot....right on Mt Hope Bay. So, we stuck her in the car, her complaining all the while. Well....we got there (it's about 75 mins from home!!), parked the car and walked up to the middle of the campus. She lit up!!! Hadn't even heard anyone speak, or saw anything other than a few buildings. Something clicked inside her. She just looked at me and said....'If I don't get into Emerson, this is where I want to go.' Ooookay.
She auditioned at Emerson..did very well. I asked her what her plans were. I didn't want her at Emerson...way too narrow a school. She said she was glad she had auditioned for Emerson but was really putting RWU at the top of her list!!!
She went to the accepted students day, and on the way home, said she wasn't sure she had made the right choice!! She hadn't found anyone to be friends with, she didn't think she was going to fit in, etc. Same thing after the two day orientation. Well, now??? She has the most wonderful group of friends, she has a boyfriend, she has been in two shows and is in rehearsal for two more. She loves most of her classes and professors. She is getting good grades.

So, I guess my point is that you can just never tell. You should go with that first gut feeling. Most kids are going to find others just like them. It is very unusual for that to not happen. And most kids find that if they try some new and different things (clubs and other activities) they will find others just like them.
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Old 02-10-2013, 12:43 PM   #1072
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Thanks! Our starting point/top picks at the moment are: TCNJ (reach), Rowan, Monmouth, Richard Stockton and for out of state: Coastal Carolina, West Chester and Towson. I do not mean this in any derogatory sense, but from what I've read on the internet () it seems these three are thought of in the same tone, i.e, party schools, not the hardest curriculum, sort of slacker schools. HOWEVER, this is coming from places like College Confidential where all anyone is concerned with is Ivy league. As long as my daughter is happy and learns, I'm okay with it. Not every school is for every person and as long as it's safe and helps her to grow as a person and educates her, that's all I want. And considering I've had to push her because she's not a self-motivator, maybe a less stressful environment is where she belongs. Please don't anyone be offended by my comments. I'm simply repeating what I've seen elsewhere and I'm still looking forward to checking into those schools. One of the other things I read on RateMyProfessor.com is that NJ students are not looked highly upon my Coastal Carolina students. But again, that would not stop me from having DD look into it. She is her own person and will do fine where ever she is.
My dd is also a junior and we are looking at some of the same schools...so far we have visited only Stockton and Seton Hall. Planning a few more visits this spring.
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Old 02-10-2013, 01:42 PM   #1073
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My dd has narrowed it down to Iona, LeMoyne, Siena and Binghamton. Anyone have any knowledge of these schools? Any insight? Thanks!
Siena was the second choice for both of my kids. They were both very impressed. We (the parents) liked it very much as well. Granted the last time we were there was 2006, I think.
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Old 02-10-2013, 02:11 PM   #1074
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I attended West Chester and absolutely loved it! It definitely is an affordable in state school for students who are still exploring their passions. (It's also great for those that have a definite career path). Lots of school spirit, great diversity and good academics.

DD is also contemplating Coastal Carolina for it's theatre department. I have yet to visit though.
My DS's girlfriend is going to West Chester. Her sister is graduating from there this year. They both LOVE IT.

I don't think you can go wrong with any of the PA state schools. I went to Millersville and had a terrific experience. My DS was accepted at both Kutztown and East Stroudsburg, and then at a small private college- Messiah College. His first choice is Messiah, but Kutztown is a close second. He loved the campus and it had a lot to offer.

We have heard that Kutztown is a party school- and my DS is not into that scene AT ALL. He is a follow the rules kind of kid. His first order of business if he doesn't go to Messiah, which is a Christian school, is to find a group such as Intervaristy Christian Fellowship. I think a group like that will be really good for him- give him a friend base of kids who hopefully value what he values. I'm sure he will have to deal with parties, but he has already said that he is not afraid to tell people he doesn't drink, and if they don't respect him- too bad.
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Old 02-10-2013, 02:26 PM   #1075
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I'm enjoying reading everyone's responses and suggestions.
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Old 02-10-2013, 02:37 PM   #1076
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My dd is also a junior and we are looking at some of the same schools...so far we have visited only Stockton and Seton Hall. Planning a few more visits this spring.
We haven't visited anywhere yet, although we did go to Rutgers last year for Rutgers Day. She was not impressed. And they took away everything except Good Friday and Easter Monday from our spring break so I don't know when we'll go visiting. DD already has 4 days out of school this year so I'll need to speak to her GC about possibly "excused" absences for college visits.
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Old 02-10-2013, 02:49 PM   #1077
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Dd is a freshman at Roger Williams University, Bristol RI. It's nickname??? Rager Williams!! Wasn't too happy to see that after she decided to go there. It's a small school, just under 4000 students. She is not a party girl. But she is a theatre major. We have found that most of the theatre kids tend to be less of a partying mentality than other groups.
There is a fairly large amount of 'partying' going on...but if you want to avoid it, you can. It's going to be harder to find your 'niche' at a smaller school, but it can be done.

It's all about the right fit. We were lucky that dd found such a great fit. I'm sure she would have had a fine fit at other schools but this is just about perfect. And the really funny thing??? I forced her to look at RWU. Her older brother had wanted to go there but his dad wouldn't let him. It has a nice theatre program, with a terrific study abroad program for theatre majors. And, it's in a beautiful spot....right on Mt Hope Bay. So, we stuck her in the car, her complaining all the while. Well....we got there (it's about 75 mins from home!!), parked the car and walked up to the middle of the campus. She lit up!!! Hadn't even heard anyone speak, or saw anything other than a few buildings. Something clicked inside her. She just looked at me and said....'If I don't get into Emerson, this is where I want to go.' Ooookay.
She auditioned at Emerson..did very well. I asked her what her plans were. I didn't want her at Emerson...way too narrow a school. She said she was glad she had auditioned for Emerson but was really putting RWU at the top of her list!!!
She went to the accepted students day, and on the way home, said she wasn't sure she had made the right choice!! She hadn't found anyone to be friends with, she didn't think she was going to fit in, etc. Same thing after the two day orientation. Well, now??? She has the most wonderful group of friends, she has a boyfriend, she has been in two shows and is in rehearsal for two more. She loves most of her classes and professors. She is getting good grades.

So, I guess my point is that you can just never tell. You should go with that first gut feeling. Most kids are going to find others just like them. It is very unusual for that to not happen. And most kids find that if they try some new and different things (clubs and other activities) they will find others just like them.
My dd was accepted into Roger Williams - dance major - but turned it down, despite an excellent financial package. Although we never visited it, she did fall in love with it online immediately, but Muhlenberg was her first choice and was accepted, so bye bye RW. In the end, her first choice is what she decided best for her, and with the package they offered it brought it down to the cost of Binghamton (her next choice), so Muhlenberg it is. I think she would have done well at RW and would have loved it, but we are very happy with her choice.
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Old 02-10-2013, 03:33 PM   #1078
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We are in NJ as well. We looked at all NJ state schools as well as west Chester, kutztown, York, millersville, east stroudsburg, and one other that I can't recall. He applied to 7 schools and got accepted at 6. He chose ramapo but after 1.5 semesters and many issues he is home going to community college. Not sure where he will go next but he is at Rowan for the weekend visiting friends and said he likes it much better than ramapo. My DS just turned 20 and was a 2011 graduate of HS
I will add that his friend commutes to TCNJ and loves it. My DS has been on that campus and loved it. Again he felt he liked it better than ramapo. So much pressure to choose the right school and you hope you do but he knows so many that transfer for one reason or another. One of his friends from ramapo transferred to Rowan this semester.
My DS was accepted to Rowan with a small (I mean small) merit scholarship. The scholarship would be impressive if he wasn't a nonresident. But wowser the price difference resident/nonresident; Rowan would really have to be something for the cost compared to the other schools (and their offers of merit aid) We don't know a whole lot about the school, any info about it from you New Jersians?
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Old 02-10-2013, 05:11 PM   #1079
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I might be wrong about this but I pretty much believe that if you are NOT a "party person" it's probably a good idea to try to go to a larger school. I think some of these smaller schools (5-7K students) make it very hard to find a "place." I know we all envision the great big "football" schools to be party schools (and they are) but there is also such a wide variety of people there that I do believe you can find a place to fit in.

The majority of colleges have a drinking culture but I think if you attend a very diverse, larger school you are going to have an easier time fitting in.
Eh, I tend to disagree. I went to a small, loosely religious (options were there but not required) liberal arts college and there was no pressure to drink. Maybe 10% of students drank, but it was all off-campus. I was in a sorority and I didn't drink until I graduated, and there were several of us who made that choice. I graduated in 2010.

Now I work at a big 10 school and the pressure to drink is EVERYWHERE. I was planning to go to grad school here but I don't like the drinking culture that envelops the school.
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Old 02-10-2013, 05:24 PM   #1080
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Siena was the second choice for both of my kids. They were both very impressed. We (the parents) liked it very much as well. Granted the last time we were there was 2006, I think.
Thanks!! We haven't visited yet Lot going on around here and we got sidetracked. She has until May 1st to decide so we are getting ready to start visiting. Next weekend going to Binghamton and Lemoyne. Then in a few weeks off to Siena and Albany.
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