Why do people brag about being mean all the time?

[disney1990]

The answer is in the question. They are mean!

[Rylee]

Originally Posted by sunshinehighway

I'm sensing a smirk behind this. Maybe even a glint.

The same could be said about you.

[sunshinehighway]

Originally Posted by Rylee

The same could be said about you.

Not really. Your post was full of name calling and judgements about people. It just seems funny to me that in a thread about why are people so mean and seem to enjoy it, you post something mean and judgmental to explain.

Is it ok to be that way but, only to people you think are mean?

[Poohforyou]

OP, I'm really not getting what you're saying. Do you not want people to give an honest opinion because it might go against you're thinking? I personally don't just want people to sprinkle me with pixie dust all the time. Imo that isn't being real. Of course I don't want people in my face calling me an idiot either.

[Jabber_Jaws]

Originally Posted by shortbun

I swear, there are people all over the internet who's smirk and glint in their eye just comes through the screen because of the glee about being mean. Why is that a badge of honor? Is it the way they were raised? What causes people to take joy in mean behavior and bragging about it?

Wait 1 second. Are you telling us that its okay to be mean, but its wong to brag about it? I only ask, because I remember your " Hahahaha " post when the healthcare law was upheld by the SCOTUS. That was a spike the ball, in your face moment to those who disagreed with the law. I would say that was being mean, and the " Hahaha " sounds like glee to me?

Pot meet Kettle....

[mickeysgal]

Originally Posted by Poohforyou

OP, I'm really not getting what you're saying. Do you not want people to give an honest opinion because it might go against you're thinking? I personally don't just want people to sprinkle me with pixie dust all the time. Imo that isn't being real. Of course I don't want people in my face calling me an idiot either.

Agreed.

Certainly, there are clearly mean spirited posts on boards, FB, etc.. However, there are posts that have a contrary opinion that is given in the spirit of honesty that is viewed as an attack. Some people post and I truly think they want only responses that agree with them. Some seem to be ultra sensitive and can't take constructive critisim or a contrary observation in the least. Makes me wonder how they cope with life everyday because the world is not filled with people that smile and nod with everything that one says. Typing words on a page often does not give the spirit to which it was intended.

Although I try to keep the negativity out of my life too, I also don't want anyone sugarcoating anything for me either. If it has to be said, I need it to be said. That doesn't make it "mean" it brings reality to it.

[Rylee]

Originally Posted by sunshinehighway

Not really. Your post was full of name calling and judgements about people. It just seems funny to me that in a thread about why are people so mean and seem to enjoy it, you post something mean and judgmental to explain.

Is it ok to be that way but, only to people you think are mean?

The OP asked, "Why do people brag about being mean," I answered giving MY OPINION based on MY experiences dealing with people that brag about being mean. I never said, people that brag about being mean, are definitely inferior, insecure, etc., I said I think they feel that way. I do view it as a weakness that they haven't found a more effective way to communicate their needs, and feel because of this, they probably aren't very happy. If anything, I usually feel some sympathy for them because they are often their own worst enemies. IMO, of course.


<<"Is it ok to be that way but, only to people you think are mean?">>

Having an opinion on a possible explanation as to why people might behave as they do, does not mean I am treating them in a certain way.

Honestly, if you are of a different opinion or an expert on the subject, I'm open to hearing it, (obviously, I'm participating in this thread to read what other have to say.) Although, calling out someone for why they think people behave a certain way, seems to be looking for an argument where there isn't one.

[MIGrandma]

Originally Posted by Poohforyou

OP, I'm really not getting what you're saying. Do you not want people to give an honest opinion because it might go against you're thinking? I personally don't just want people to sprinkle me with pixie dust all the time. Imo that isn't being real. Of course I don't want people in my face calling me an idiot either.

I never expect everyone to agree with my opinions, but when they disagree in a cruel or nasty manner that is what I take exception to. They can 100% disagree with me, in a civil polite manner and that is totally fine. No problem. Everyone has an opinion, but it's in the delivery of that opinion that makes the difference. Or when they call you an idiot, or ignorant, just because your opinion differs, that's ridiculous.

Some posters here seem to delight in being nasty in their disagreeing with another poster, whether it be myself or anyone. I've seen them do it time and time again.

And those that seem to take enjoyment from taking digs at others about previous posts too. That is so childish, and can be seen as being "mean" and/or "nasty" as well.

It amazes me that some posters here bother to dig into people's past posts and bring up so much information about them. What is the point in that, really? I might remember something that was discussed, but I tend to forget who said it. I just don't really care enough to pay that much attention I guess. But when these posters constantly dredge things up, and do it just to make fun of and mock others, it is definitely mean. I just don't see what "fun" that could be, but I guess some enjoy it.

[sunshinehighway]

Originally Posted by Rylee

The OP asked, "Why do people brag about being mean," I answered giving MY OPINION based on MY experiences dealing with people that brag about being mean. I never said, people that brag about being mean, are definitely inferior, insecure, etc., I said I think they feel that way. I do view it as a weakness that they haven't found a more effective way to communicate their needs, and feel because of this, they probably aren't very happy. If anything, I usually feel some sympathy for them because they are often their own worst enemies. IMO, of course.


<<"Is it ok to be that way but, only to people you think are mean?">>

Having an opinion on a possible explanation as to why people might behave as they do, does not mean I am treating them in a certain way.

Honestly, if you are of a different opinion or an expert on the subject, I'm open to hearing it, (obviously, I'm participating in this thread to read what other have to say.) Although, calling out someone for why they think people behave a certain way, seems to be looking for an argument where there isn't one.

Well I'm sure many people who are thought of as being mean are just expressing their opinions as well.

I don't see people "bragging" about being mean. I do see posters with strong, thought out opinions (like yours) or unpopular opinions and those are often interpreted as mean. I also see posters who seem smug, not outright bragging about being mean.

I interpreted your post to be in the spirit of what the op was talking about. Maybe posters are just trying to express their opinions but its interpreted as mean because of the delivery or the way someone reads it.

[2girls4me]

On another website I post on we use the expression "Internet balls". I'm sure there are people that are mean, blunt IRL! But everyone can be mean on the 'net.

[Lionqueen2]

Originally Posted by pigletgirl

I wouldn't let someones own negativity affect you. Obviously there may be deeper issues that we do not know about. It could also be poor self-esteem too. Just continue being friendly and kind and you'll be set. What is the saying, honey, not vinegar attracts....

I agree. I feel it could be a self-esteem issue, also. I think like this feel more powerful when they are unkind.

[violetrose]

Originally Posted by Handbag Lady

I don't know but I sure don't need them in my life. I like happy and nice people.

In real life, I don't really socialize with people who are "blunt and tell it like it is."

Ick.

Really? I know a lot of people who are blunt, but also nice people. I think as somoene else pointed out that it's all in the delivery, and the true intention of a person's heart. There are plenty of people who will smile in your face, pretend like they are your best friend, but then go turn around and stab you in the back when they know you aren't looking. I'm much more fearful of establishing a relationship with that sort. At least with those who are blunt I know where I stand and feel I am getting an honest assessment.

Although I am more or less talking about people who I actually know, not people on the DIS. I don't understand a lot of the back story that is here, being a relative newcomer. I have a feeling when people are mean to each other there is more to the story than meets the eye. I also don't understand or appreciate all the delving into someone's past posts. For those of us who are just here for fun that can be really boring and petty. I've seen that quite a bit and wondered if that is just exclusive to the DIS. I haven't seen it as much on other message boards but since this one has been around for so long maybe people know each other offline and have a history together?

[pacrosby]

Originally Posted by Sgt Mickey

I also disagree with this. IMO it is just another way to be nasty and blame it on the poster. I think that sometimes the person is asking one thing and being accused of 10 other things so when they defend themselves this is what is thrown at them.
Not to say that some people do not want real opinions but I don't think this falls under most posters.

Absolutely....and this is in fact some poster's MO. The OP asks a question and instead of responding to the question at hand people start assuming all sorts of nonsense in order to express an alternate position. Then the OP comes back to clarify or correct the misassumptions and they get hammered with "why did you post if you didn't want to hear other people's opinions" etc. etc. It happens ALL the time. People who do that are trying to be difficult and create drama. There is no other explanation for it.

Then there are those who think they are so witty when they pull comments out of context and try to turn them on the poster followed by an array of silly emoticons. That's Junior High School at it's best.

Frankly I'm alittle taken aback by all the people who are trying to stand in defense. Sure, we all know that a poster's intent can be miscontrued but there are clearly a whole slew of posters who love to try and make themselves feel superior by making others look foolish. Unfortunately for them it seems they don't realize that they are the ones who end up looking foolish. For every poster who sides with them and their nonsense on the thread, there are probably 10 lurkers who see them for they really are.