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View Poll Results: How do you feel about a "surprise! Your best friend is in the wedding!" situation?
Great idea! Let him be in the wedding and wear his blues. 8 66.67%
He should be in the wedding, but wear a tux to match the others. 1 8.33%
Don't surprise your fiance with a groomsman... 3 25.00%
Voters: 12. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 09-05-2012, 02:22 PM   #1
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 96

SURPRISE wedding guests & One groomsman in dress blues?

My fiance's best friend (with his girlfriend) is planning on surprising him by showing up for our WDW wedding in December. As of right now, he thinks that his friends can't afford to come. The girlfriend is my MOH, little does he know...

My problem is that now the best friend also wants to be in the wedding. However, he doesn't want to pay to rent a tux, and we can't afford to rent one for him (especially without my fiance finding out). He's asked if he could wear his marine dress blues instead. I'm prior military, and I have no problem with dress blues, but I feel like it might look strange for everyone else to be in matching tuxes while one groomsman is in blues. I don't want it to take any of the focus off of the groom at the event or in photos.

The other problem is that some people have said it's not a good idea to surprise my fiance with his best friend being in the wedding party. I've also had suggestions to have him come and then ask to be in the wedding. But there are problems with that as well. My brother is not currently in the wedding, but if this friend were to be a groomsman, I would ask my brother to jump in for me to keep the numbers even...

What are your opinions on this?
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Old 09-05-2012, 08:27 PM   #2
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Numbers can be off, who cares.

Brother, give him something to do read or say something.

Now as for the uniform, you are the only one who can answer this. Would DF feel like he was upstaged by his beft friend in uniform? Usually the advice is to tell the Marine not to out shine those in the wedding party. DH has not warn his uniform because of that. We went to a vow renewal and the groom did not wear his uniform.

That being said, there are versions of his Dress Blues that he can wear where he would not be as "dressy", if there was such a thing in Blues

He could forgo the medals, and mabe not wear the jacket but wear the tan shirt instead. Not sure what all of them are called. Been married to the Corps for 16 yrs and have not learned all the uniforms There are also rules as to where/which/how he can wear the uniform. Talk with him about it.

All that, to say go for it I think it would make some great pics to see best friend walk down the aisle just before you. Don't know if I could pull that off.

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Old 09-06-2012, 10:03 PM   #3
When we were kids (long time ago) they did this with cows.
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I voted it's a great idea dress blues and all. But, I think the other groomsmens feelings need to be taken into consideration. Will their feelings be hurt. (although I think this would be more of an issue if we were talking woman.) Also, did you future husband originally ask this "best" friend to be the best man, so if he now shows up does that mean the current best man gets.... demoted?

If it was my wedding and it was important for either my husband or me for a particular person to be in the wedding but finances wouldn't allow, I would take any circumstances that allowed that person in the wedding and would be thrilled. When I got married many years ago my DB was out of work. He and his wife & son meant the world to me, but DB was out of work, so none of them could afford to be in the wedding. I look at wedding pictures to this day, and they just don't seem right. Have him in the wedding.
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Old 09-07-2012, 08:55 PM   #4
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My DD is getting married to a Navy Diver this coming May. He will be in his Navy dress blues and so will half his groomsmen. The other half will be wearing tux's. My vote was for letting him into the bridal party with his dress blues...
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Old 09-27-2012, 09:58 AM   #5
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Go for the blues! Something else to keep in mind is when to surprise hubby. Is minutes before the ceremony when the attention should be focused on bride and groom the right time? Maybe plan on surprising groom the night before. This way you dont have to worry about the secret surprise all day on your wedding day! Also make sure the positioning of the soldier doesnt demote a current best man.
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