Am I being selfish??

[crisi]

We go in summer now. Really, it started to HURT missing a mere three days after about third grade. I have bright kids, but it was hard for them to keep up even with those small absences.

But I also think its important to be honest. Family time is important. School is important. But you are not saying that family is more important than school when you choose not to go in summer due to heat and crowds. You are saying that avoiding heat and crowds is more important than school - and that may be true, but don't wrap it up under "but family is so important." There are some families - for example, when someone is deployed overseas - when pulling kids from school is the ONLY opportunity for a family vacation. That isn't your case.

[kristenrice]

My dad started planning an extended-family vacation for the kids/grandkids several years ago. He really enjoys the weather in February-April so that was his initial plan. When the time finally rolled around to make a final decision on the dates, we decided to go the second week of June, right after school let out. Most of our group had never been to WDW before so we did not want to deal with the big crowds around Easter. Nobody wanted to take their kids out of school (ages 3-10...6 of them!) so we decided on June.

Initially, my parents were really worried about the weather in June. We ended up with the best weather EVER! We had rain one day (and that was the day we left...the day Debby came in!) but other than that, it was high 80's, low humidity and a gentle breeze every day. The crowds were low (IMO) and we never waited more than 30 minutes for anything...and that was Kilimanjaro Safaris at 3pm without a FP. After the trip, everyone commented on what a great time of year that was to travel. It was easy to pack because we knew we wouldn't need anything long-sleeved. We didn't have to worry about a blizzard stranding us somewhere.

My dad had always said he will never go to WDW in the summer...well, guess what? Now he is planning another family trip in 3-4 years and June is his first choice! I guess my point is that you shouldn't write off all summer travel completely.

[delaneyc52]

Originally Posted by Brian Noble

The school policy is the school policy. You can't really change it. Each set of parents will have to decide whether it is worth the "cost" of not being able to make up work in exchange for this vacation.


Agreed. If (and only if) each set of parents is okay with missing the time, go for Thanksgiving. But, if one set isn't willing to do it, you'll have to decide whether or not a partial group is worth taking, or you'd rather go in the summer.


Our last two Orlando family vacations were both in the summer, because that's the only time everyone's schedules line up. True, we could have pulled our kids out of school instead---and our school district is more lenient---but we decided not to. We figure that having kids means that we sometimes have to make sacrifices elsewhere, and this is just one of those times. And, to be honest, it wasn't that bad. More water park time, afternoon breaks, we had a ball.

Agree. Well put Brian. While I do feel for the OP's wonderful intent to gather the family, I know our school had extreme rules re missing time in school. We did as Brian and while summer could have it's issues, it was the best time ever!! Everyone was in summer mind mode without the school anxiety hanging over them.

[SLM]

November is a wonderful time to visit WDW. But after 3rd grade we decided not to go during the school year. My daughter was never in classes where the work could be made up in a day. She was also involved in music, drama, yearbook, etc. If she'd missed a week of school to go to WDW or anywhere else I doubt she would've been yearbook editor or first chair in orchestra-and these things were important to her. If your grandchildren are little that's a different scenario-but the parents get to decide. We usually went in late August. It was hot, but when you go often, heading back to the villas for lunch and going out later is doable. Being together is the main thing, isn't it?

[yeahdisney]

We will go around the holiday, we will miss one day of school. We are taking them out at 2:10 missing their last class, study hall. They will miss One day when they come back. This year 8th grade - missing is hard for the student, dd had all A's last quarter, I'm hoping one day will be OK.

[turkeymama]

I am a special education teacher (elementary). I don't think it is selfish to hope everyone can go together and I understand timing is a delicate issue since so many people are involved. Heck, i have pulled DD out 3 times (1 week each time) for Disney trips.

However, as others have mentioned, it tends to get more difficult for the kids missing school the older they get. Also, DS has learning disability and he misses time with therapists and special Ed teacher in addition to regular classes. If this applies to your grandchildren, or if they are above grade school age, I would not pull them. That is my opinion as a mommy, not a teacher. Okay, I guess that is my teacher opinion too.

Good luck. I hope y'all can make something work.

[spiceycat]

summer if you plan it - is not so bad. first go early - then leave when it gets to hot or humdity or you are just tired. then go back early evening when it is cooler.

let everyone go when and where they wish (this is hard for some people). meet at least once a day for a meal. but otherwise don't expect everyone to do what you want.

also would go for one the DVC resorts closer to a park. pick the park your family loves the most - and get a DVC resort within walking distance of it.

now thankgiving week would be great - but in this state the legislative is now telling the schools how to schedule their year - so would expect Nov thanksgving to be only thurs and fri...

[wrighter]

Something to consider, based on their age, is what the children think about the whole thing. (OKay, they can't MAKE the decision, but they can at least speak their peace.) :-)

We took our kids out for a week last October to meet family from around the country at WDW. The kids were in 1st and 3rd grade - and the week they missed was a full week of half-days (due to school conferences.) We'd been assured by other parents and even teachers that they really wouldn't miss much.

We had a wonderful trip, and I wouldn't change the fact that we went. But upon our return, both kids stated that they really wouldn't like to miss school again for vacation. They just didn't like feeling like they'd missed stuff - and even though we got as much done as we could before and during the trip, they were indeed "behind" once they got back.

In the future I might consider pulling them for a day, but otherwise all future trips will be during the dreaded Easter, Christmas, and Summer breaks. I'm sure we'll still find a way to have a great time. :-)

[smjj]

I failed to mention the kids ages and school grades. One will be in 1st and the other 4th grade when we go....smjj

[turkeymama]

Originally Posted by smjj

I failed to mention the kids ages and school grades. One will be in 1st and the other 4th grade when we go....smjj

In Louisiana, 4th grade is a high-stakes testing grade. If this applies in your grandchild's case, that would be one more thing to consider.

[daisyduck123]

I have pulled mine out of school (elem - high school) many times for WDW vacations, & those trips were for 10-day vacations.

The kids will remember a family trip FAR longer than they will remember whatever was taught in school that day. I also believe that NO ONE is going to NOT get into the college of their choice because of a family vacation they took in elementary school.

Oldest DD is a 17yo sophomore in college...missing all that school didn't hurt her one bit.

I say, "Go for it & have a great trip!! The lower crowds will make the trip so much better for all ages in your family.

BTW, I'm a public school teacher & I pull myself out as well!!

[jennypenny]

We used to pull our kids out, but not anymore. The schools are much more strict about it now, and they go so fast these days that the kids do miss a lot. My kids asked to stop missing school because it was stressful. (I don't want to say the teachers gave the kids a hard time, but they weren't as eager to help them catch up if the absense wasn't due to illness).

Plus, if you pull them early in the year, you have to hope that they don't get sick a lot and end up missing too many days. I'd be more willing to pull them towards the end of the year if I had to, but like I said we stick to summers now.

[turkeymama]

Originally Posted by daisyduck123

I have pulled mine out of school (elem - high school) many times for WDW vacations, & those trips were for 10-day vacations.

The kids will remember a family trip FAR longer than they will remember whatever was taught in school that day. I also believe that NO ONE is going to NOT get into the college of their choice because of a family vacation they took in elementary school.

Oldest DD is a 17yo sophomore in college...missing all that school didn't hurt her one bit.

I say, "Go for it & have a great trip!! The lower crowds will make the trip so much better for all ages in your family.

BTW, I'm a public school teacher & I pull myself out as well!!

I agree with you for the most part. Unfortunately, our district has adopted such a strict policy on absences it is very difficult to pull this off. If OP's grandchildren are facing similar conditions, it may not be so easy. I find that very sad because we had the best times on those trips when I did pull DD out. If the kids miss 5 days, the parish truancy officer sends warning letters. Anything after that can result in court appearances.

[k3chantal]

As a public school teacher turned stay at home mom who sends her children to private schools, this thread reminds me why I like the private system. I get to determine if my children should miss school without a government agency determining that I have made the wrong choice. And yes, I understand that there are terrible parents out there who have made bad decisions therefore making school districts have to create attendance policies like these. I just think it is unfortunate that we all have to suffer under it unilaterally.

Grandparents become too old to go on these vacations as time goes by and it is really a shame that as a country we are not finding 'value' in our family relationships.

Now the disclaimer in my reply is that if your child struggles in school or it takes a lot of effort to stay on grade level, but all means they should not be taken out. But if they are like my children who are above grade level in all subjects then the 'education' they receive on vacation can be just as important.

[vicki_c]

Originally Posted by kirstenb1

After 3rd grade, we couldn't take our older dd out of school anymore for vacations. So for the last 6 years, we've sucked it up and gone in June, as soon as they get out.

I don't really think it's a matter of "selfish". Really the parents just have to decide if the kids can afford to miss school and still get good grades. Ours can't so the issue is settled for us.

This is how we feel now, even though we had always pulled the kids put in the past and I had no issues with it. We last pulled them out for a week to see the space shuttle launch (sad, didn't go) and the schools considered that as excused but we had to get permission from the principal. My kids were in 4th and 6th then. But my DS almost didn't make it out of 7th grade last year, so we just cannot pull them out anymore. And it is a hassle with the school, even when it's allowed. Made me feel guilty.

So we've done Easter break the last 2 years since we won't go in the summer (I lived in FL, so I know all about summer). It's crowded and definitely not as enjoyable for us compared to January or Feb trips.

As was stated, it's really up to the parents and the grandparents should accept that and work around their decision.