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Old 09-05-2010, 08:27 PM   #31
SeaSpray


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Quote:
Originally Posted by minniebeth View Post
Seaspray, I'm so glad you had some positive things like your trip to WDW, the trip to NJ, your son getting a job he likes, a raise!

How frightening that your DH had a heart attack, but wonderful that it was diagnosed properly when it was and that he could take steps for a full recovery. Glad he is doing well, we will keep him in our thougts.

I hope that your DS' cyst will heal well soon. Hope all is well with your DS in college too!

Thank you for your update~ you remain in our thoughts and prayers that sunshine and peace surrounds you!
Thank you so much, minniebeth.
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Old 10-01-2010, 12:54 AM   #32
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Hi all.

OP,
I am glad that you son is doing better and that your husband is OK. You have been through so much. Feel free to pm me anytime, and I am usually up late each night if you want to chat. I was told once that talking about your problems was the best thing a person could do to help themselves.


I was diagnosed with PTSD over 20 years ago. My husband (at the time) was in a horrific accident. He was in critical condition for a long time, not expected to live. Then in a coma, and I was told he could be in a "vegetated" state the rest of his life. I did fine for many months (at least I thought I did) but later it all hit me, and I broke down.

I was on meds and had counseling for a long time but eventually I no longer needed the meds and was doing fine. ( Some things were never 100% the way they were before of course.)

This is my current situation. Maybe someone here can make a suggestion for me, please?

I think my PTSD is rearing its ugly head and I am having a really hard time right now. I know that my problems are not as bad as you guys, but still, I am not coping so well.

It started back some for me when my father passed away. Insomnia, but I got ambien and it was manageable. (Then had my hysterectomy which seem to add to it too.)

Then my company shut down and I lost my job after 23 years. I loved my job and my company. It was horrific having to let people go that I had worked with for years and years. Co-workers that had become close friends stopped talking to me after I had to let them go. It really hurt...still does. I also knew in my heart that I was going to be let go at some point myself. ( I felt this, but of course no one told me, so it was constant worry of will I or won't I.) I had a terrible time adjusting to all of this. I still am.

I am an older adult that has only had one "real" job in her life. Not a good candidate for hire anywhere, especially since my industry is not doing well. I tried for a while, with not even an interview. Then I became ill ( had to have some medical tests done.) and lost my unemployment benefits due to not searching enough. ( Nice reward for being honest about my job searches.) At this point I was really getting upset, and I had horrible panic attacks just by job searching the Internet. I was scared to death for some reason to even apply, let along think of going on a job interview. I mean really, really, scared. ( and I was a person who headed a corporate department, in a fortune 250 company, dealing with issues on a nationwide level. Yes, I was once "together"!) I had become so panic stricken that even my husband told me to stop searching for a while till I could get myself together.

Then add a home burglary and the loss of so many things, most not covered by insurance. Worse of all were loosing all the things that once belonged to my dad. ( Some very special honors/plaques.)

I am not getting better.

My husbands line of work dried up in 2000 and he was out of work for a long time. After that time, the only work he could find was temp assignments or contract with no benefits. After 9 years, we were blessed that he did finally find a job with some (terribly expensive) benefits just before my job ended, but he has been told that this job ( and maybe the company) will end soon. He is looking, but nothing is out there and chances of him getting a job with benefits is slim. He is well educated,excellent in his line of work, and willing to do anything/ any job/ any field to get benefits, but I know last time even Home Depot and the grocery store would not hire him. ("Over qualifyied") He is 7 years older than I am but still too young for medicare.

I don't know what we will do about health care. I don't think either one of us will qualify for private health care, even if we can afford it.

It is horribly hard to fall asleep no matter how tired I am, my mind is full of worry or in a dull daze. I haven't slept for more than 4-5 hrs a night for the last 2 years. ( and I wake up during the night during it.) It is really starting to take a toll on my health. Surprisingly I am not that sleepy during the day, but I am forgetful, unorganized and, not so sharp anymore.... you get the idea.

I also can't stand even the slightest responsibility without feeling panic.
Even something so simple as my husband wanting me to call someone as ask them a question can set me off. The Dis Board is the only place I free comfortable and I don't freak out over asking or doing stuff. ( We actually have trip planned, but I won't go into how/why we are doing this in this thread.) Even that is not getting me as excited as it should but it will at least get me out of the house, which I also do not do anymore.

I know I need to go in and get back on antidepressants and ambien, but if I do that will be a major black mark that could keep me from getting private medical insurance. I don't know what to do. My husband has friends ( both professionals and both out of work right now) who have told him they were turned down for prescription coverage or insurance and they don't have ANY existing conditions and they had used their (old) insurance less then us.

Anyone here not on disability, that has to use private insurance? Will I have to give them my complete medical history? I don't know how I can do that. I have had a lot of medical tests done in my life under a bunch of different insurance policies. I can't even remember the different insurance companies I have had, let along the different diagnosis. I can't really even recall things from last year. How would I ever be able to find the information? What if I miss something? I have heard that later they can deny coverage for a major illness due to this!

I am terrified that I will get relly sick without insurance. I am also worried that the insurance will lapse, and even if DH gets a job with benefits, one of us could end up with cancer or something and be told that it started during the lapse period, so we would still not be covered due to it being considered a pre existing condition!

Any advise would really be appreciated.


Ps- Just being able to tell someone has helped. Thank you.

Last edited by Friendly Frog; 10-01-2010 at 01:47 AM.
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Old 10-01-2010, 01:23 AM   #33
Friendly Frog
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Obadiah Stane View Post
I have been treating for PTSD and depression for just about six years now. Mine stems from a long career in law enforcement where I witnessed many horrific deaths from homicides, car crashes, and suicides. I also shot and killed a bank robbery suspect. There was not just one incident anyone could point to. It was more of a cumulative type thing. However, the last suicide where the guy killed himself in front of me (instead of killing me) was the last straw. Life has been hell since then. I have been in and out of the hospital a few times over the past few years for mental health issues.

My symptoms have run the gamut. Flashbacks, night terrors, nightmares, lack of sleep, nausea, heartburn, headaches, ED, irritability, numbness, withdrawing from the world...the list goes on. I have been on many different kinds of meds and finally found some that work the best.

Treatment has been so helpful. I have gone at least once a week, sometimes more, for the past six years. I am much better off than I was before, yet I still have a lot of work to do. I am still rebuilding and trying to fix all I have screwed up.

I do what I can to avoid stress and things that trigger the thoughts and flashbacks. I can't avoid them completely so I have learned many coping skills. I too stay away from violence and watch little TV. What I do watch is happier stuff.

Thanks for listening.
First thank you for your service in law enforcement. It is a difficult field for the person and their family. I am sending you, and everyone in this thread prayers for peace.

Interesting that I have most of the the same medical problems as you mentioned, but I never linked them to PTSD.

I watch TV, but it has to be light. Andy Griffith and Leave it to Beaver, American Idol, and I purchased all the Frasier episodes to watch at night when tv gets a bit too "dark" for me. I once loved Forensic Files and Dateline, not anymore, not even the news....especially not the news!

We have a trip planned which includes HHN for my husband. I have been trying to be upbeat about it, ( he doesn't know how bad my depression is getting.) but I am having some second thoughts. I am not so sure that is a good idea. So far I have not been having the horrible nightmares. I am a little worried that HHN might trigger them, even though I know everything there is in good fun and I like good set design. I think I will be ok, as long as I don't hear a helicopter. ( Med evac from the accident.) That sound coupled with screams might set me off.
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Old 10-03-2010, 07:21 AM   #34
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I am pretty sure that I have post traumatic........I may get 5 hours at night... if I am lucky, most of the other time I am in pain and try to watch tv just to take my mind off of it. Lately, I have been weepy and it is around the anniversary of my husband's death, but I am just plain worn down. I will see my doctor this week and I will get answers. I do have private ins which I pay dearly for......but like you will not be able to get anything else as I have a disease that will hinder anyone else covering me..

I just try to get through the nights and live the days the best I can.. It is not easy but it is what my life is right now. I go to a grief counselor and I have friends but clearly it has been a year since he died and I would have hoped I was moving forward more, maybe I am expecting too much from myself, he is so missed... Anyway, yes I would say I am living with ptss...

hugs to you all...
Marsha
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Old 10-07-2010, 12:09 PM   #35
SeaSpray


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Quote:
Originally Posted by Friendly Frog View Post
Hi all.

OP,
I am glad that you son is doing better and that your husband is OK. You have been through so much. Feel free to pm me anytime, and I am usually up late each night if you want to chat. I was told once that talking about your problems was the best thing a person could do to help themselves.


I was diagnosed with PTSD over 20 years ago. My husband (at the time) was in a horrific accident. He was in critical condition for a long time, not expected to live. Then in a coma, and I was told he could be in a "vegetated" state the rest of his life. I did fine for many months (at least I thought I did) but later it all hit me, and I broke down.

I was on meds and had counseling for a long time but eventually I no longer needed the meds and was doing fine. ( Some things were never 100% the way they were before of course.)

This is my current situation. Maybe someone here can make a suggestion for me, please?

I think my PTSD is rearing its ugly head and I am having a really hard time right now. I know that my problems are not as bad as you guys, but still, I am not coping so well.
Friendly Frog:

I'm so sorry for everything that you've been through, and what you're still going through. I wish that I had advice or information to give you, to help with your insurance issues. I do think that if you feel that you need to take an antidepressent and something for your sleep problems, that you should do it. I never knew that it could cause problems for future insurability, though. Does anyone have any firsthand experience with this?? I would hope that those sorts of medications would not impact future insurance, but I don't know. Please hang in there!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mackey Mouse View Post
I am pretty sure that I have post traumatic........I may get 5 hours at night... if I am lucky, most of the other time I am in pain and try to watch tv just to take my mind off of it. Lately, I have been weepy and it is around the anniversary of my husband's death, but I am just plain worn down. I will see my doctor this week and I will get answers. I do have private ins which I pay dearly for......but like you will not be able to get anything else as I have a disease that will hinder anyone else covering me..

I just try to get through the nights and live the days the best I can.. It is not easy but it is what my life is right now. I go to a grief counselor and I have friends but clearly it has been a year since he died and I would have hoped I was moving forward more, maybe I am expecting too much from myself, he is so missed... Anyway, yes I would say I am living with ptss...

hugs to you all...
Marsha
Hi Marsha:

I can't believe that it's been a year already since Tom has passed. Time seems to fly whether we're having fun or not, doesn't it. How did you make out at the doctor's office?? I hope that you were able to get at least some kind of relief (pain relief, emotional relief, whatever you need). My DH had a heart-related scare yesterday (he had a massive heart attack at the end of May), so I'm feeling more stressed today than usual, I think as a delayed reaction from yesterday. He's fine though, fortunately, but something like that brings back the feelings of when he was having the heart attack. That's one thing that I hate about PTSD, is that things can "trigger" us and flood us with thoughts and feelings and emotions from the event that caused it in the first place.

Anyway, I'm rambling now.. But I hope everyone is doing a little bit better.
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Old 11-29-2010, 10:40 PM   #36
SeaSpray


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Minor update

Hi everyone:

Not a real lot of news here... which is a GOOD thing, I think!

DS22 has been mostly home-bound for the last 6 weeks since his surgery for the pilonidal cyst removal. Because of the open-wound healing method, the average is about 8 weeks. We saw the surgeon today and he's very happy with the rate of healing, however, there's a small red patch of skin right next to the wound, and we're not sure what it's from. The doctor has ruled out a fungal infection and a re-infection due to a new cyst. He told us to watch it, and see if the area gets any larger. DS still has a visiting nurse each day to change the dressing on the wound, so they're watching it, as well.

DS's mental health seems relatively good these days, which in turn helps me to feel less stressful and anxious. I'm tempted to go off of the Zoloft, but I know that just because I've been feeling good for the last few months, doesn't mean that I should go off of the medication yet. I'm thinking that if I still feel "good" 6 months from now, then I will ask my doctor how to dose the medication to go off of it slowly.

DH is doing well, health-wise. He is still not smoking, which is great! He's lost more weight and he looks excellent. Work is a little stressful, but we talk about it, and I let him vent to me. He's the manager of an engineering department of a large electronics company. He loves his job, but a lot of responsibility lands on him, and he has to make sure that everyone does what they need to do.

DS19 is doing well. Still working at his DGF's parent's restaurant on the weekends, and going to college full time during the week.

My DSis and DBIL were just up here in MA visiting for a few days, from NJ. We had a great few days! My sister is my best friend.

I'm still seeing a psychologist about once every week or two or three. We schedule appointments weekly, but oftentimes either he or I have to reschedule. That's ok though, I don't feel that I need to see him every week anymore. I guess that's progress, right?

I hope that everyone "out there" is doing well!
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Old 01-19-2011, 09:31 AM   #37
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My husband had PSTS after his father died after hitting his head when tripping on the last stair in his basement. 5 months after that his sister, his best friend, only 46 died after battling breast cancer. He had so much anxiety and stress, my husband lost his job..he was rock bottom.

He eventually started medication, currently on Prozac. Even though he had a tough time with the transition on the meds, it has been almost three years and he is the most care-free fun loving guy you. He said the meds change his life and will never get off of them!
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Old 01-29-2011, 04:54 PM   #38
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sad but true

My brand-spankin' new PTSD and subsequent panic attacks were diagnosed once we returned from our WDW trip in September.

I should also say this was our FIRST (and last) trip to WDW; it was our honeymoon and we flew from Idaho to Florida on a Wednesday only to have to leave early (Sunday) and drive home. Yes, to Idaho from Florida, by Wednesday.

I never wrote a trip report (can you imagine why not!?) and really won't even talk about the trip to anyone. After we got home, as instructed by the FQ manager, my husband contacted the WDW Travel folks to make sure the refund for the unused nights was being handled. It was the DISNEY TRAVEL AGENT who told him to submit a claim with the trip-interruption insurance company since the trip was ended early by circumstances beyond our control. (PTSD was diagnosed as a result of the horrible flight from SLC to Orlando and a first-EVER panic attack on Mission:Space. Thus, the need to drive home; no chance in %*$& of getting on plane again. [and I have easily flown 50+ times in my lifetime])

It's now 4 months later and we finally just received the refusal letter from the insurance company because it was a mental condition, not a physical one. Wow. Really?

So we basically flushed thousands of dollars and ruined our honeymoon. The only reimbursement was the unused nights of hotel.
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Old 02-05-2011, 01:01 AM   #39
Obadiah Stane
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Things are going a bit better. I talked with a retired local officer a few weeks back who left his job last summer from PTSD. He is still in a quite fragile state, but is doing OK. Anyway, at one point he asked me if it gets better? I told him I can't look at it day-by-day, or week-to-week, as the short term is such a roller coaster. However, I told him when I look back over the past almost seven years things are better overall. I told him to stick with the mental health treatment and to use his support group as much as he can. As we all know, the times when you are feeling the best is when you feel like being around people and the times we you are feeling the worst you don't want to be around anyone. Yet, that is the time when you need your support group the most.

Take care all and I wish all who suffer from this and other debilitating mental health issues well.
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