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-   -   WWYD? cut trip short to attend wedding? (http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=2208692)

AmyBWV99 06-20-2009 10:54 AM

WWYD? cut trip short to attend wedding?
 
We have a family wedding we just found out about that 'suddenly' came up and will be planned in 3 months before their baby is born.

We have a trip planned and ressies made and paid, arrival flights made but not yet return flights. We have already paid for the 2 nights at CBR and made all the DVC reservations months ago. Part of us feels obligated to come back and think it'll look selfish that we wouldn't cut 3 days off our trip to attend, then the other side says had we had ANY IDEA we'd have adjusted our dates long before now.

Aother little tidbit of attending the wedding requires us to fly into their airport (the wedding is 2.5 hours away from our home). Which will mean some family memeber will have to bring us our van and pick us up at their airport. It is doable but kind of a pain to whoever will be responsible for all that, then there's the fact that the days we'd be shaving off are weekend nights at DVC are on borrowed points which means there's no way around losing some. We could use them on the front end of the trip and cancel the CBR portion but there's no scenario that it's even so some will be lost since we're aren't retuning till after our next use year begins. Then there's the fact that our first day in WDW will be resting day so no parking so DH can run RFTT so that's one additional lost park day.

Ugh, our family is important to us and we attend everything for everyone even the out of town stuff. The only time we've missed the out of town stuff was due to pregnancy or illness so it's basically expected we'll be there.

IWe're so torn has anyone else had to sacrifice WDW for family stuff?

dvcbnd 06-20-2009 11:17 AM

If it were me, I'd probably not attend the wedding for an extended family member, but attend for immediate family. I would also take into account how "close" I was to the person getting married. I'm not sure if I helped at all - good luck and have a wonderful trip. :goodvibes

daisyduck123 06-20-2009 11:22 AM

Hi!
We're DVC members as well, & we've also had to postpone a trip at the VERY LAST minute (we were supposed to spend 8 days at SSR during Thanksgiving week last year & DD14 ended up with an unexpected hospital stay..17 days!)

What I would do, if I'm understanding your situation correctly, is..try, try, try to move your weekend nites to the front of your trip and if you can, then cancel CBR).

If you're not able to rearrange the days, & will end up losing the points...I honestly think my family would miss the wedding, unless we had another trip scheduled soon. My family's vacations are mainly ALL about our two children (DD14 has esp. been thru a lot this year) & no way, would I shorten our WDW trip on her. WDW is much more enjoyable than a wedding!

Be prepared though, for some family members to be upset. Most people just don't understand our 11month/7month booking windows & why we need to plan our vacations so far ahead of time. Our plans can't just be changed at the "drop of a hat".

Good luck to whatever you go with!

MariDisney 06-20-2009 11:25 AM

I'd probably send a lovely gift that is more extravagent if I attended along with my regrets.

disneyjunkie 06-20-2009 11:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AmyBWV99 (Post 32356068)
We have a family wedding we just found out about that 'suddenly' came up and will be planned in 3 months before their baby is born.

We have a trip planned and ressies made and paid, arrival flights made but not yet return flights. We have already paid for the 2 nights at CBR and made all the DVC reservations months ago. Part of us feels obligated to come back and think it'll look selfish that we wouldn't cut 3 days off our trip to attend, then the other side says had we had ANY IDEA we'd have adjusted our dates long before now.

Aother little tidbit of attending the wedding requires us to fly into their airport (the wedding is 2.5 hours away from our home). Which will mean some family memeber will have to bring us our van and pick us up at their airport. It is doable but kind of a pain to whoever will be responsible for all that, then there's the fact that the days we'd be shaving off are weekend nights at DVC are on borrowed points which means there's no way around losing some. We could use them on the front end of the trip and cancel the CBR portion but there's no scenario that it's even so some will be lost since we're aren't retuning till after our next use year begins. Then there's the fact that our first day in WDW will be resting day so no parking so DH can run RFTT so that's one additional lost park day.

Ugh, our family is important to us and we attend everything for everyone even the out of town stuff. The only time we've missed the out of town stuff was due to pregnancy or illness so it's basically expected we'll be there.

IWe're so torn has anyone else had to sacrifice WDW for family stuff?

I feel the same way family. We are very close, even extended family. I would attend the wedding. Disney will always be there.

dis-happy 06-20-2009 12:02 PM

Would really depend on how close a family member this is (sister or brother? vs. neice or nephew or aunt or cousin?). Also, is there a shower you can attend at least? Your own family and your vacation time is important too. I think it would be okay to bow out, especially if you focus on the point that you have planned this for many months so your husband could run and have already purchased non-refundable airline tickets (not need to mention your return flight hasn't been booked yet!).

powellrj 06-20-2009 12:20 PM

It really depends on how close the family member is. For a brother or sister, I would go, but for a cousin twice removed, I would pass.

momof1princess 06-20-2009 12:39 PM

since the wedding is sort of "spur of the moment", the bride and groom should expect that there will be some people who cannot attend. unless i was particularly close to them, i would send a nice gift with my regrets and go on my vacation. JMHO.

disneyjunkie 06-20-2009 01:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by powellrj (Post 32356883)
It really depends on how close the family member is. For a brother or sister, I would go, but for a cousin twice removed, I would pass.

What does cousin twice removed mean? Forgive me for not using google.:flower3:

churchpilot 06-20-2009 01:11 PM

Considering the time and expense of a Disney vacation and the fact that this is a wedding you didn't know about when you planned your trip, I would pass and send a generous gift and note. The fact that you are so close with your family should help. They know you and know your heart. If you are like most Disney people, these trips are priceless and there is no guarantee of another trip. Follow your heart and best wishes.

dis-happy 06-20-2009 01:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by disneyjunkie (Post 32357398)
What does cousin twice removed mean? Forgive me for not using google.:flower3:

It would be two people who are cousins, and twice removed would be 2 generations down (one cousin has children, and they again have children, those would be twice removed).

disneyjunkie 06-20-2009 01:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dis-happy (Post 32357486)
It would be two people who are cousins, and twice removed would be 2 generations down (one cousin has children, and they again have children, those would be twice removed).

So third cousins?

Yeah, I would still attend.

MSSANDRA 06-20-2009 01:37 PM

I would be sure and let the bride and groom know that you already had plans when they scheduled the wedding and that is why you are unable to attend.

Send a nice gift and perhaps a token from WDW for the new baby if you are close and enjoy your family trip.

adventure_woman 06-20-2009 02:02 PM

For me, it depends on what relatives. If they were brother/sister, then I would probably go to the wedding. Other than that, I would let them know that we had plans months and months ago and I'm so sorry I can't attend. I am a big planner ahead, and why should I and my family suffer if someone can only plan 3 months ahead?! (I understand it is for the baby, but they have to understand that is short notice). Now, if it was 6 months to a year out, then they are planning ahead. And it sounds horrible, but if my family were to get mad, so be it. They'll be mad at someone for something, so it might as well be me going to the merriest place in the world!!

bumbershoot 06-20-2009 02:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by disneyjunkie (Post 32357540)
So third cousins?

No. the "removed" part is different from just 1st, 2nd, 3rd cousins. I can't explain in words, I have to have a chart, LOL.

OK I'll try.

Let's pretend my brother has kids. So there's me and brother.

I have a son, E. Pretend my brother has a son. They are first cousins to each other.

When they each have kids, their kids will be second cousins to each other.

However, E and brother's son's child would have "removed" in their relationship name. Going straight across the list is 1st, 2nd, 3rd etc cousins. When you go diagonal, that's when "removed" comes into play. And the number down is the numbered part of the once/twice/etc removed.


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