Solo with two kids- advice?

Hi everyone!
I could use some advice on my upcoming trip to Dl! We are headed over Dec 5-14- it's a short flight (1 1/2 hours) and at this time we are planning on staying at BWPPI. This will be year 3 of an annual Dec trip! I will be going with my kids DS-2 and DD-9. Here is the problem- every year prior I've gone with both DH and my mom to help with the kids- this year it will be just me (mom has other travel plans and DH just started a new job). I thought about skipping this trip but in reality I look forward to it all year and the kids and I would be soooo sad if we missed it! However, while the start of Dec isn't "prime" season yet, its busy and I have 1 kid that meets all the height requirements but may not feel comfortable going solo on rides (she's pretty shy) and 1 kid who is 2 so meets no height requirements and no other adults with me! I could really use words of advice (and encouragement!!!) on how to navigate the park this year (we will have 5 day park hoppers). I'm super bummed that I won't be able to do any of the height required rides (9 year old is not old enough to watch 2 year old while I hop on), but not as bummed as I would be if we didn't go at all. Any ideas on how to encourage a super shy child to do single rider so she doesn't miss out? Any tips or touring plan ideas on what to do, what order, etc? I'm excited to go but SO nervous to do 9 days solo with 2 kids plus a busy park and dealing with the airports!! Ack!! Tia!!

Well as a solo mum - I do everything alone with my kids or we don't do it. It is all in your mindset - I am sure you are a very capable woman who does many things on her own with her kids at times. I think part of it for you and DD will be accepting that whilst there are limitations to the things you can't do without that extra person to look after the 2 year old such as some of the rides. Maybe think about some of the entertainment and other things to see and do that you might usually skip as you race from ride to ride. Maybe stand in line with your DD until she gets on the ride and then step through or exit and make sure she knows exactly where you will be waiting for her at the exit gate when she hops off - then she won't feel as alone as it will only be the actual ride she is with other people. Start with the rides that are easily accessible and where she can see you when she rides - even if it means a solo turn that you maybe could hop with all 3 to build her confidence if that makes sense - e.g. maybe on Dumbo she could have a Dumbo to herself while you ride with the 2 year old in another Dumbo (if he meets height requirements - not sure but I was assuming that was a pretty tame ride lol), the carousels etc that will get her used to going solo and then build up to some of her more desired rides that may mean you are more out of sight while she rides. Just take a relaxed attitude, enlist her as a helper to problem solve before you go about what you can do and how you will do it all - it will make her feel a more active part of it and a little grown up and let her think about what she can do rather the things you might be missing this trip.

YouTube videos of the rides can be very helpful for timid kids. It will help your daughter decide whether she is interested in a certain ride, then show her what to expect. ToonTown will be a fun place for all 3 of you. Don't focus on what you yourself can't do this trip, but look for all the things (and there are quite a few!) that you can all do together. Take lots of photopass photos with all of you together. It's great that you'll have plenty of time to take a relaxed pace and enjoy the favorite rides/shows/restaurants/etc. more than once. If the budget allows, there is a nanny for hire (Nanny in the Kingdom?) who helps single parents in the parks. She comes highly recommended.This will be a great trip and you'll make wonderful memories!

I was divorced when my kids were really young, so was used to taking them by myself to Disneyland. I learned early on to adjust my expectations to enjoying time with them, and didn't go on many of the more exciting attractions until they were old enough to go or walk with me through the queue, past the vehicle, and wait on the other side for me. If you feel that your 9 year old is old enough to wait a couple of minutes, you can do this for the attractions you REALLY want to go on. Since we went a lot, my kids weren't alarmed, nor did they feel nervous (they're 14 months apart), and it was usually my son who waited and my daughter & I rode. But, this is not something I did often, and not something every parent would be comfortable doing, but they were old enough and they were cool about it.

On the other hand, you can look at this as a super cool time to enjoy with both of your youngsters, and concentrate on attractions, shows, parades that all three of you can enjoy together. One thing I would recommend, is to have your 9-year old help plan a day and do the things she wants to do, and have her plan things that your 2-year old would enjoy, too. I wouldn't force her to go on single-rider unless she is comfortable. I remember going with friends, and they were going to force their 10-year old to go on Indiana Jones. She had tears in her eyes, so I offered to stay with her, and we walked through the vehicle to the exit (she was so relieved). I also have a nephew who is timid about some attractions, and so when he & his brother were younger I planned the visit so all three of us could enjoy the experience at the parks. When he was older (14), then he'd walk through the queue with us and wait while we did the more adventurous attractions (his younger brother loved them). I also went one time with some cousins, and they told their young 8 yr-old that he was going on Radiator Springs Racers. It was too intense for him, so now he has this memory of his parents making him ride on an attraction that was kind of 'scary' for him. I'll never forget the look he gave his dad (he was so mad). I've kind of learned to tailor our trips for everyone in our group, not just the adults. There's always another time to go to the parks and enjoy the more exciting attractions.

There is still a lot you can do with both of the girls that will fill up your day at Disneyland and/or California Adventure Park.

It can be nerve racking on your own with your kiddos if you are not use to it. But it will be easier than you think (coming from the lady whose husbands works a lot so I do 90% of my kids lives solo, including a road trip 1/2 way across Canada in a minivan and my 4 kids )!

A stroller will be your best friend at the airport (gate check it) so you can put the two year old in it and your carry ons, so your hands are free to pull the luggage off the carosel. As for being in DL your 9 year old will understand her options, just sit down and talk to her before hand and let her know she will get to choose if she rides by herself or not. Do all the rides you can with the 3 of you (there are actually a lot), enjoy the parades, the shows, the magic that is Disney!

Have a magical time!

I agree with the stroller; it'll be a must. Like in real life, do the best you can. I took my 3 children alone, ages 7, 6, and 3 at the time and we drove from Utah to Disneyland. Kids generally don't know they are missing out unless we make it obvious. There is so much more to Disney than the E ticket attractions too (dating myself there). Like others have mentioned, enjoy the shows and parades. Enlist the help of your older child too; let them be part of the decision making, offer viable choices. Let her help choose where you eat and things like that. Enjoy a character meal in the parks or at one of the 3 DLR hotels. I really like the idea of walking through the line with your oldest so she can ride and then waiting at the exit for her.

Have you considered hiring someone for a part of the trip? The hotels usually work with companies that can hire a sitter. My family has used destination sitter before. I will be solo for part of my trip in Dec and am thinking of hiring someone from care.com to help me in the park for about 6 hours. Some of the locals have Disneyland passes or even work at Disney so it doesn't cost extra for their entry. And some sites allow you to run background checks if you choose.

I see a couple of people have suggested waiting through the queue with your DD and then stepping through the vehicle to the exit. I don't have personal experience with this, but I've always heard that kids who don't meet the height requirement are not allowed to wait in the queue at all, so that might be a problem with the two-year-old. However, if you hired a sitter for the two-year-old for a few hours, you could take DD on all the height requirement rides, and if she doesn't want to ride she could probably step through and wait for you at the exit (since she meets the height requirement). Here is something I haven't done myself but I've seen suggested elsewhere - if your DD doesn't have a cell phone, buy a cheap set of walkie talkies that have enough range that you can talk to you DD while she's in line. That way she might feel a little more comfortable and the other people in line with her might be less inclined to try to make conversation with her (if that's something that would bother her, being shy). I would also try to hit those rides that she'll be going on alone early in the morning when lines are short so she's not alone too long.

I feel for you. Due to divorce I found myself a father with a 7 year old and 5 year old at disneyland. I would agree with everyone on some of the no brainers that you should bring a stroller, plenty of snacks and plan everything with your older child. Since you have been there multiple times, I imagine that your oldest knows the layout of the park pretty well and what to expect on rides. I would suggest walking through with your child on each line up and then walking away from the ride and meeting her on the other side. If confident enough you can even use your oldest as a runner for getting fast passes and on the plus side the oldest can use everyone fastpasses.

I found the hardest part of the trip at the airports. I suggest carry on for everyone. I don't know you,, but I was able to get all of our stuff in three carry on bags and it eliminated one further wait. On my trip I even got randomly selected for extra "observation" while trying to corral my children. The best moment of the trip was the security official watch me struggle with everything in the process of getting through the airport and he shot me a confident look and smile and said "you're doing great dad" That gave me everything I needed to get control of the situation.

You deserve major kudos for keeping your tradition going without the help of your DH or your mom! Two summers ago I took my DS (7 at the time) without my DH. We had the BEST time! My son is not that into rides so we did other fun things that my DH would not enjoy that much, like seeing all the shows and collecting pressed pennies. We got a pressed penny book and a map from one of the shops and filled the whole book! It was like a treasure hunt. We had a blast and we both still talk about. We also took long mid-day breaks at the hotel and never felt rushed. I tried to get him to do some of the bigger rides, but he wasn't into it so I didn't push it. We really had a great trip. Of course, that trip was only 3 days and we didn't have a little one with us. Nine days seems like a long trip. Is there any way for you to shorten it?

Oh, something new that DS wants to do his time is look for hidden Mickey's. That could be another fun activity when not going on rides.

Hey, let's keep in touch. We're planning on being there Dec 10-13th with my mom, sister, and 3y.o. nephew. My son will almost be 9 by then. Maybe we can meet up and the older kids can go on some rides together.

Have fun planning!

I love the advice you've received here!

My girls are now 9 and 10 1/2 but we've been going to Disneyland just the three of us regularly since they were little little and not always at the same height requirements. So there were rides we had to skip. Now we have the situation where little sis will go on anything and big sis has a few rides she refuses to go on. So we just don't go on those that particular trip. We know we'll be back (including trips when dad goes or we go with family/friends) and focus on getting to do exactly what we want when the time is right. It's a good lesson for all of us to put the comfort and happiness of our loved ones before our desires sometimes.

That being said, there's so much you'll get to enjoy and fit in without having to worry about waiting for the big rides. Shows and entertainment and all the wonderful details. This will be especially true at Christmas time! You may want to consider the holiday tour... while I don't know if there's an age requirement I think it's suitable for your two year old and the rides you're taken on are all ones she can go on (pretty positive - IASW, Haunted Mansion and Jingle Cruise if I'm remembering correctly). Plus front row seats for the holiday parade and treats. We did it last year and loved it!

calilou said:

You may want to consider the holiday tour... while I don't know if there's an age requirement I think it's suitable for your two year old and the rides you're taken on are all ones she can go on (pretty positive - IASW, Haunted Mansion and Jingle Cruise if I'm remembering correctly). Plus front row seats for the holiday parade and treats. We did it last year and loved it!

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Take a look at the holiday thread - the word there seems to be that rides are no longer included in the tour. It still might be something to consider, unless you think the kids would get antsy spending a couple of hours walking/listening without rides. Presumably the tour will include something else to make up for the lack of rides, but I don't think anyone knows what it is yet. But beyond the tour, there are a lot of holiday offerings that you can enjoy as a family without worrying about heigh requirements and age differences. Santa, bell ringers, carolers, Viva Navidad, and I hear there's going to be something like a food festival going on in DCA this year. There's a lot that we tend to overlook when we're focused on rides.

Niltiac said:

Take a look at the holiday thread - the word there seems to be that rides are no longer included in the tour. It still might be something to consider, unless you think the kids would get antsy spending a couple of hours walking/listening without rides. Presumably the tour will include something else to make up for the lack of rides, but I don't think anyone knows what it is yet. But beyond the tour, there are a lot of holiday offerings that you can enjoy as a family without worrying about heigh requirements and age differences. Santa, bell ringers, carolers, Viva Navidad, and I hear there's going to be something like a food festival going on in DCA this year. There's a lot that we tend to overlook when we're focused on rides.

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What?! That totally stinks!

I travel with just kids all the time, one thing I have done in the past might help you. When I was at a water park with just my 7 year old and her shorter friend, my daughter wanted to go on the slides but her friend couldn't - and didn't want to. My daughter is also shy. I would try to get in line with preteen or teen girls, and I would ask them if my daughter could "hang" with them for the duration of the slide while we waited at the bottom. Teenage and preteen girls are always willing to help, especially to take a younger girl under their wing. I think my daughter might have been intimidated by being pushed off with other adults, but it was sort of "cool" for her to be riding with 14 year old girls! If you are considering having her go on a ride, wait by the entrance for a minute and see if any teen girls walk up, kids are generally more comfortable around other kids than strange adults. I didn't feel awkward asking the girls, and they were always helpful. The worst that can happen is they say no. If you see a mom and daughter, you could trying asking the same thing. Good luck on your adventure, you will be fine!