Cause I know you will understand

LCoulter

LCoulter

Whoah Mouse
Joined
Nov 9, 2008
In June we started planning our next trip for Jan 2016. Some friends have been bugging us for several years now to take them. Not sure why they want to go since they aren’t Disney people, don’t like crowds, and don’t like kids. We have a DD8 and even though they are good with her, they aren’t going to want to hang around with her the entire trip, which is fine, they can go off and do their own thing and meet up with us whenever they want. They said no because it’s too close to the holidays…which I understand, kind of….they really aren’t much into the holidays so they really don’t do much for it so not really sure where that is coming from. So before I booked, we asked if they are sure because if they change their minds at the last minute there won’t be any rooms left. They said there was no way they would change their minds so I booked just a one bedroom at BLT a little before 7 months.

I think you know where I’m heading with this…..we are at 42 days and they changed their minds. :rolleyes2

I was surprised to see that there is a 2 bedroom available for 5 of the 6 days at BLT (one day mid-week isn’t available). There are no studios anywhere. We ended up telling them that there isn’t anything available without a split stay which we aren’t willing to do. It would really complicate ADR’s and fastpasses too. It figures that they would change their minds.


Well, you snooze, you lose.
 
Don't go out of your way to accommodate them. You asked and they said they weren't interested. Like you said you snooze you lose. Enjoy your trip.
 
I get it. I have done lots of planning based on family/friends being there with us that has turned out to bite me in the end. No more. Now I just plan for my family and if it works out for our family/friends, then so be it...if not, oh well. I think a lot of folks don't get the DVC way...that a lot of pre-planning and work goes into a DVC trip.
 
What I tell people is:
Whoever pays the piper calls the music. :rockband: :charac2: :mic: :music:
If your friends wants you to go on a vacation and they are willing to pay for it, go and have a great time on them. If you are paying for the trip you go when you choose to go and if they say no then it is on them.
 
It sounds like your were more than accommodating to your friends. It also sounds like you are aware/concerned about some areas that you feel could cause conflict. Given how they acted in this process, saying they were not interested, then saying they were, I would take heed of those concerns. If you change to a 2 BR you are now rooming with friends who have shown themselves not to be overly concerned with things you voice to them (such as please let us know if you will change your mind as this could be a problem). The last thing you want is to have someone who is making you feel like you are not living up to their vacation expectations on a vacation that really is yours to begin with.
 
It's for the best. The last time we vacationed with them the wife drove me kinda nuts. We went on a cruise with them and the very first night, she booked a manicure during dinner. I told her dinner was at a set time.
 
Totally understand.::yes:: You asked twice and they made their decision which was "no". Friends/relatives must understand how difficult it is securing the DVC reservation of your choice at 7 or 11 mos in advance; just almost "impossible" to do without ALOT of advance planning; unfortunately some just don't get this.:eek: ENJOY your vaca!:goodvibes
 
I'd have done the same LCoulter. I wouldn't even suggest friends joining us unless I was sure they'd enjoy doing the parks the way we do them. That would eliminate just about everyone I know ;)
 
I would let them know that you are sorry but there are no DVC reservations available, but then tell them some options of hotels--I would give a deluxe with pricing, moderate and value. Let them know that you have already made FP reservations, so the for some rides, you might be separated. If they really want to go, they can still go, and there are no hard feelings.
 
ldo said:
I would let them know that you are sorry but there are no DVC reservations available, but then tell them some options of hotels--I would give a deluxe with pricing, moderate and value. Let them know that you have already made FP reservations, so the for some rides, you might be separated. If they really want to go, they can still go, and there are no hard feelings.
Click to expand...

I wouldn't give them pricing, if they want to go to Disney, let them do the work!

:earsboy: Bill
 
"Oh, gee, I'm so sorry. Its really impossible to plan a Disney trip short notice - which is why we asked twice before we made arrangements. It will simply be impossible to include you in our plans with so little time before the trip - we made dinner reservations almost five months ago already and by now, we wouldn't be able to add guests. Maybe next time."
 
LCoulter said:
They said there was no way they would change their minds so I booked just a one bedroom at BLT a little before 7 months.

I think you know where I’m heading with this…..we are at 42 days and they changed their minds. :rolleyes2

I was surprised to see that there is a 2 bedroom available for 5 of the 6 days at BLT (one day mid-week isn’t available). There are no studios anywhere. We ended up telling them that there isn’t anything available without a split stay which we aren’t willing to do.
Click to expand...
I would probably have just said, "I checked and there is no availability. Sorry it didn't work out."

But your answer is fine. I wouldn't overthink it, and I wouldn't worry about how you handled it. You did more than most reasonable friends would do.

Usually, the problem is the opposite -- everybody is on board until they start pricing airfare and park tickets...and then all of a sudden, it's Uncle Ernie's dog's birthday and we can't go!
 
See that's the thing, people totally don't get that we have to plan ahead for DVC rooms, especially for busy times, and if we want to stay in a particular resort. My brother totally doesn't get it. I did take him and family with us one year, but he really resisted planning ahead, I booked the room 9 months out. At certain times of the year I'd be doing a split stay at that point. Tried to explain, but I don't think it's going to happen again.
 
LCoulter said:
In June we started planning our next trip for Jan 2016. Some friends have been bugging us for several years now to take them. Not sure why they want to go since they aren’t Disney people, don’t like crowds, and don’t like kids. We have a DD8 and even though they are good with her, they aren’t going to want to hang around with her the entire trip, which is fine, they can go off and do their own thing and meet up with us whenever they want. They said no because it’s too close to the holidays…which I understand, kind of….they really aren’t much into the holidays so they really don’t do much for it so not really sure where that is coming from. So before I booked, we asked if they are sure because if they change their minds at the last minute there won’t be any rooms left. They said there was no way they would change their minds so I booked just a one bedroom at BLT a little before 7 months.

I think you know where I’m heading with this…..we are at 42 days and they changed their minds. :rolleyes2

I was surprised to see that there is a 2 bedroom available for 5 of the 6 days at BLT (one day mid-week isn’t available). There are no studios anywhere. We ended up telling them that there isn’t anything available without a split stay which we aren’t willing to do. It would really complicate ADR’s and fastpasses too. It figures that they would change their minds.


Well, you snooze, you lose.
Click to expand...
Obviously there are variables here we won't know and possibly, you won't either. I do get the sense they want YOU to take them on your dime, at least for the lodging. It also seems that they have a habit of creating issues. If you were to change, don't be surprised if they cancel last minute and if they didn't, they complain the entire time about cost, lack of restaurant availability, have to get going too early or any one of a number of other issues. We're lucky, we do family trips most years for between 30-40 people and have essentially no drama. But I've seen enough info here and in other situations to know that people who are an issue are WORSE when it comes to timeshares and Disney even you you'd think they'd be better at such a great place, esp if you're treating them. And if you don't treat them, it's often perceived as you're trying to take advantage of them because it's a timeshare so it's free. One of my sayings is "Crazy becomes crazy on steroids" in such a situation.
 
LCoulter, I think you were more than fair and generous. Some folks just don't think very far beyond their own wants/needs and never consider what is involved in a gift of accommodations.

com_op_2000 said:
Whoever pays the piper calls the music. :rockband: :charac2: :mic: :music:
Click to expand...

TOTALLY agree with this! :cutie:

I've had a similar situation happen not once but twice with one of DH's kids. One was a major trip overseas where we had to make reservations a year in advance and a month later, book airfare. It was a TS rez at a very popular resort in a highest demand month, and I made it patently clear that we needed absolute commitment whether they were going or not. We were okay with it either way, but I made it clear that the rez would not be able to be adjusted if they changed their mind and would cost me a good deal of time, money and anguish. They were excited and committed. Well, surprise, surprise. Just a few months later they suddenly cannot go now and had neglected to tell us they had a new job possibly in the works at the time we were booking a trip that included them. :headache: Later, with a DVC rez where we try to gather the brood I had a similar situation with the exact same family member. I couldn't believe it. Without going into detail, it created a ton of trouble. If I had not carefully explained in detail the amount of time and planning and energy it takes to secure high demand/low supply rooms like a GV, it might be different. Ugh. If either case was something urgent, I would totally understand.

We have had much better luck planning with friends (and our other children) that seemed to "get" that they would be causing a lot of grief if they changed their minds. Bottom line, LCoulter……. these friends seem to either not care about your needs or just simply be woefully ignorant and apparently have proved they would not be able to be trusted to be included in your future plans unless they are booking their own reservations on their own dime. JMHO.
 
Yes... Planning with friends and family is super hard. Currently planning a dec 2016 trip and hope hope hope my best friend comes.

She said she's committed, and I love her to death, but I'm not sure if she's really gonna fly out from Los Angeles with her brood when the times comes.

If she doesn't come, we are ok with staying in a 2bd std for 11 days with just a 5 and 2yr old. It'll be a lot of space for just us.

But the way I see it? It's worth it for the opportunity to spend with good friends or family. Call it a $1k opportunity cost (the maint fee for the extra points to upgrade from a 1 to 2bd...)

On your side, however, the couple doesn't seem like they are truly great friends that would be worth the opportunity cost ;)
 
I really think you're better off doing your own thing and if they truely DO want to go they can call and make their own non-DVC reservations & do their own planning and you can just "meet up" from time to time when it works out. That would tell you just how bad they really want to go - if they're willing to spend their own money on it.

We offered to plan an extended family trip a few years ago with us providing the place to stay - but with the understanding that anyone else would have to get themselves down there and pay for their own park tix and meals. I provided info. on park tix pricing and the average cost of CS meals (I knew none of them would want to pay for TS) so that they could be informed up front on the cost and I told them the day I was booking (7 months out) and nobody would commit. I was already dreading the amount of whining about how expensive meals & tix would be so in the end it was a relief and it saved us a ton of points. I decided I don't want to go with anyone who's going to faint from sticker shock. We have our own budget to stick to so I understand - but I don't want anyone to go if it's a hardship - then it's not enjoyable.
 
Hey OP. I feel your pain! I would do as others have said. Tell them, "Sorry, but as I explained six months ago, we cannot add someone at this late date. However, you might want to check if Disney has cash rooms available?" I'll bet you they don't even check. As a new DVC member way back in 2001, I realized that people were only truly committed when they had put down cold, hard cash on the trip. We plan our trips 12-14 months in advance. If I invite others to join us, I tell them that they must buy their airline tickets prior to the 11 month window and I give them a date. Once they have purchased the tickets, I go ahead and make the DVC reservation at the 11 month window. Often, we then switch to another resort at 7 months if the guest party has a preference. Since I have instituted this process, I have never had someone back out on us! However, for our March 2016 trip I invited a recent college graduate niece along. I have paid for everything including airfare and park ticket. I know there is a chance she will back out of the trip, but I knew that going in. Its a chance I am taking.
 
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