Convincing new husband to visit more than every 5 years?

ConnieB · Mar 31, 2015

agavegirl1 said:
Dear DIS,

I have been a member for a while now and managed to convince my current Fiance to visit with me twice. He was somewhat stunned by the price on visit one (Beach Club during F&W) and a little placated in October (POP with a bunch of discounted gift cards and Disney reward dollars).

I still need my Disney "fix" and haven't adequately expressed it.

How do YOU talk "Disney" to a non-Disney spouse and actually get to go?

My husband just doesn't care about Disney....but it's important to the girls and I, so we go without him, with his blessing. He doesn't "get" it but he doesn't object to our going.

Obviously, the thought of vacationing without your brand new spouse is a bit daunting....but does he have a hobby or something he likes to go and do that you only go along to be with him? Perhaps he can go off and do that while you spend a few days at Disney. My husband travels for his job, so his idea of a perfect vacation is sitting at home relaxing, puttering around the house, playing computer games and just having some fun with his friends since he seems them rarely due to work. So he does a "stay-cation" and we go to Disney.

As for sticker shock....yeah, that can be quite a sticking point if he doesn't enjoy it....it's easy to justify spending a couple hundred dollars a night if you really love the place, but for the non-lover it feels like a waste of money. We compromise by not staying onsite, so it saves us a TON of money.....though now we stay much longer so it kinda evens out after all these years, lol. There are many ways to lower the cost and be onsite, and as someone suggested, the budget board has lots of ideas to save before and during your visit....but also look into staying offsite (and many of the budget board ideas will make that even more cost effective).

vallerii · Mar 31, 2015

kaetra said:
I like the way you think!

haha....Not that I wanted some of our other vacations to be disasters, but I guess it all worked out in the end.

isabellea · Mar 31, 2015

I combine with a beach trip. I like Disney, he likes the beach so we combine both. This summer we are are WDW for 7 nights then St. Pete Beach for 10 nights. Last year, it was 15 nights at the beach then 3 at WDW.

nilla · Mar 31, 2015

mom2rtk said:
Not loving Disney is not a personality flaw.

Watch your mouth!

Alesia · Mar 31, 2015

Nobody enjoys a trip they have to be "convinced" to go on. Either go without him or don't go.

Nancyg56 · Mar 31, 2015

My DH loves Disney but he is not an every year traveler. He wants us to go, and joins us every few years. I have long since stopped trying to convince him to do things or go places he is not inclined to do or to go.

Vacations are expensive, and for many the price has to match the experience they have. I think your best bet is to find out what he really is thinking about the vacation. Perhaps he really cannot justify the money spent on a Disney vacation because it really is not where he wants to go. And then figure out how to compromise in terms of vacationing in general, and about vacationing in Disney. If her really does not like it, I would stop trying to push it.

lillyshula · Mar 31, 2015

My husband is a CPA and looks very hard at the value of what we are spending on a vacation. He went to Disney World last year with me for the first time and enjoyed the trip, but doesn't see the appeal of going every year. He is perfectly fine staying home and swimming in the pool on his vacations. I grew up going on huge vacations almost every summer (not just Disney). So when it comes to planning vacations now, I am trying to plan Disney every 2-3 years. That gives us plenty to time to save extra money for Disney vacations and gives him closer to home vacations as well.

100AcreWood · Mar 31, 2015

Have you considered trying a 4 night cruise? That would give you a Disney feel with a very different kind of vacation for your fiance.

amandals2007 · Mar 31, 2015

Get a new husband :rotfl:

StormyCA · Mar 31, 2015

My DH is NOT a Disney Fan, and that's putting it mildly. So I go with my BFF, and our husbands (hers isn't a Fan either) happily wave us goodbye for our girls only trips to Disneyland once or twice a year. He'll go with me about every 5 years. This year he promised to come with me to DL for my birthday and because he really didn't want to go to DL 'again', suggested we go to WDW instead because 'if I have to do Disney I'd rather do 'new' Disney'! YAY!!

Anyway, find a Disney travel buddy. Married couples aren't joined at the hip. My DH has a a few outdoorsy type things he enjoys (I'd rather chew glass) so he does those on his own (with BFF's hubby). We RV so we do that together (hence the trip to WDW and Ft Wilderness).

As far as the cost, it's your money, too. I budget and save up. It's actually cheaper to travel with BFF, I only have to pay half the hotel & travel costs!

lustergirl · Mar 31, 2015

go without him :daisy:

dkrauss · Mar 31, 2015

The cost of going to WDW is something that can be maneuvered and controlled (relatively speaking)

There's a bunch of good suggestions here..........I particularly like (because I use them) "renting" DVC points. I'm also a big fan of the Disney Vacation Account............we're saving for tickets for our Jan 2016 points and with a second account saving for annual passes to purchase in December 2016. So cost, while high relative to many other choices, can be manipulated.

The love of Disney and all that goes into "doing" the parks..........that can be much more difficult. WDW is huge...............you can't do it all in a week........

.........not even close. You know your fiance/husband best.........what does he like? If he's a fisherman.........maybe schedule a fishing excursion on Bay Lake! Is he a "foodie"? If so you have a multitude of options. You have to set up a trip that he'll enjoy........and "hopefully".........slowly turn him to the "Disney Light"!!!!!

My wife was never the Disney-file that I was........but after a pretty busy/traumatic time in our life I planned a short surprise trip to WDW for her. I was sure to put her in scenario's I knew she'd enjoy............set aside time for her at the pool with an adult beverage, romantic dinners, etc. We didn't run crazy on this trip.............kept it slower........on purpose. Well now she's hooked and we've got 3 Disney trips planned for 2016...........and with Annual passes going in to 2017..........we're calling that year.....The Year of Disney!!!!!

In the end since this is your love..............compromise and planning on your part is a must. In end if its about you guys spending time together........WDW is the best place for that.... :teeth:

IMHO!

Doug :goofy:

agavegirl1 · Mar 31, 2015

Thanks all for your input. To clarify a little...

Yes, the price is part of the issue. We do vacation elsewhere, a lot. We just got back from a week long trip to the Caribbean and airfare is pretty crazy to Belize. We have been there 6 times. We have been to WDW twice. I think the idea of staying off site may be a big help. I can just call it an "Orlando Vacation".

A big part of the problem is that he was "bored" last time during the trip. He doesn't feel the same way I do about Disney Magic and there just wasn't that much "new". I carefully planned new dining experiences (which he does enjoy but thinks the price is outrageous). I did use Disney Visa reward points for our dining and that helped tremendously.

So here is my plan so far...Orlando about every 3-4 years, staying off site or renting DVC points. I'll stay for a shorter period of time and maximize my Disney Visa points. We'll try other places in Orlando and rent a car. Oddly, during our last trip he did not want to rent a car but we did for two days to go to Busch Gardens and he really enjoyed the freedom.

I may be able to convince him to do a couple of days in Disneyland/CA. That might take care of it.

As for travelling with someone else? That would be tough. My four kids are all grown, some with kids of their own and not willing or able to travel with mom unless I pay for it and plan everything. I'm still waiting for some of my kids to invite Grandma on a trip with the grandbabies. I do have one Disney daughter who takes her kids to the World and even did a Disney cruise a few months ago. I'll suggest tagging along and paying my own way one of these times.

Thanks for all the good suggestions...except, I'm not leaving him. We travel very well together. He just prefers new and different to tried and true and is not a fan of Disney pricing.

TravelingTotMom · Mar 31, 2015

Have kids! He may not completely "get" your Disney excitement, but seeing it through the eyes of their own child, and forget about it!

I worked on my husband (dragged his butt to Disney) for years pre-children. Before I made sure to tone down my commando touring and make sure there were beer breaks. I took him to events (F&W) and restaurants (Coral Reef) that I knew he would enjoy. I also completely sold him on staying onsite b/c of the benefits and even found a resort he loves (POR). In fact, he now wouldn't even imagine not staying on site, and if we book a value b/c it's a better deal, he is actually disappointed we aren't staying at POR.

Also, if he wants a change of pace, go to some of the competition parks, and that may change his perspective as well. After waiting 30 min. just to exchange our ticket vouchers just to get into SeaWorld, he even made a comment that that would never happen at Disney. I recently won a free trip to Universal, and while they have some cool rides, there really isn't much for our son, and it's more fun for us to watch him have fun now.

I think he was all set holding off on taking our child to Disney for a couple years... and we lasted 7 1/2 months. We only went to MK for a day, but it really was magical watching him experience everything, and we are going back for three days for his first birthday.

All of my careful plotting has paid off, and I see some annual passes in our future (*maniacal laugh).

DougEMG · Mar 31, 2015

If you want to stay onsite and in a deluxe resort look at renting DVC points.

tlmadden73 · Mar 31, 2015

You just have to convince him (hard to do in today's culture) that money is better spent on experiences than "things"

It's hard to put a value on experiences.

Angel Ariel · Mar 31, 2015

agavegirl1 said:
I may be able to convince him to do a couple of days in Disneyland/CA. That might take care of it.

I would seriously think about doing this this year,especially. The 60th anniversary is bringing a bunch of new things to DLR, plus there is SO much there that is entirely different from WDW. If boredom and feeling like there was nothing new to experience is his major gripe about WDW, there is plenty of new-to-him stuff at DLR! Plus there is so much in the So Cal area right around Anaheim, that you could explore outside the Disney bubble too.

SplashMo · Mar 31, 2015

One person saves the money up over the year and goes each year with the family. Disneyland is not really cheaper than WDW. However it is another option if airfare is reasonable. At DL you can stay offsite across the street and stay for less days.... Perhas 4 days....

slaveone · Mar 31, 2015

If luxury is his thing try off season but at club level. My father never was a big disney person outside of Flower and Garden. He would go to humor us but maybe once every 5 to 7 trips. We did club level at Wilderness Lodge and he was in heaven especially since we lucked out and got a beautiful view of the castle and fireworks. Now he and mom are going for their anniversary this fall.

mikana876 · Mar 31, 2015

I compromise by switching up where we go on vacation. He likes cruises (so do I!). I like Disney. So every year we go somewhere, but Disney is only once every 2-4 years.

Convincing new husband to visit more than every 5 years?

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