Parents, Please Control your Children

[pampam]

The other day we were at MK, just enjoying the ambiance. Jim was at Coke Corner, looking spiffy as usual playing the white piano. He gave a lovely introduction to Maple Leaf Rag, standing up and giving some of it's history. Then he began playing. Along came 2 boys, about 6 and 7 years old. They went up to the piano, the older boy hanging over it looking and the younger one banging on the keys. Jim continued playing, giving it his best, while the young lad was pounding on the bass keys. Along came the parents and not once did they correct their child. They only suggested moving on to something different. Still the boy banged on the lower notes, and Jim valiantly played on. It was the worst rendition of Maple Leaf Rag you can imagine. The parents moved on, and little Johnny, noticing they were gone, finally left too. Jim finished with a flourish, and smiled. Of course he couldn't say anything about what had happened. I felt bad for him.

I never would allow a child of mine to behave in such a way. There was no correction, guidance or direction from the parents, let alone discipline. The children were allowed to do just whatever they felt like.

 

[mom2rtk]

I'm sure the parents thought their spawns were adorable. Oh, and talented.

 

[loves to dive]

I probably would have said something to the parents, polite but something none the less. I was sitting near the fountain in Morocco last time I was there and watched as two little boys fished for the coins in there. Mom and Dad thought it was cute until they say me looking then told the boys to stop (didn't tell them to put the money back). Didn't take the boys 1 minute to be back in there fishing. I went over and sat on the fountain and asked them if they knew that money was for poor people who couldn't afford to eat much less come to Disney and they were stealing. They looked at me sort of like are you crazy lady but stopped. Now, I don't really know what that money is for, for all I know the employees split it but I do know it wasn't theirs.

 

[magicaldisney]

I will say, it seems that the behavior of young ones is getting worse. It's hard to keep my patience some times.

 

[goofy4tink]

I believe the money that is tossed in fountains and displays is routinely taken up and giving to various charities...but I could be wrong.
I've seen families allow their children to take off their shoes/socks, and wade in the fountain behind the Castle. It always amazes me to see what some people feel to be acceptable behaviour. Like the time we had waited very patiently for Winnie-the-Pooh at CP. We had been seated just as he left our area, so we had to wait through the entire rotation...about an hour. Well, as dd got up to have her time with Pooh, a woman ran over, pushed her young child in front of my dd, saying that they had waited and just couldn't wait any longer..her child needed to see Pooh bear now!!!! Amazing...and dangerous since Pooh didn't see the small child and almost knocked her over to turn to dd!!! I wish the handler had been there..but she was off someplace else.

 

[starjazz]

If kids can't be kids in Disney World, I'm not sure where they can be. I'm not suggesting that just anything goes, obviously, but I try really hard not to judge other families. I know with 100% certainty that there are times that my family must look like a complete disaster, and I hope people can be understanding of it. Just my take.

 

[Turn the Page]

I must have a very old school parenting philosophy that just doesn't jive with more modern approaches but I just do not understand the constant coddling and lack of expectations parents have for their kids. The constant "make good choices" and not worrying about disciplining their kids because natural consequences will do the job for them and you can't risk hurting their self esteem. At what point did it become acceptable for kids to raise themselves?

I once knew a woman whose son was completely out of control. He was about 6 years old at the time and she was constantly getting calls from school about his behavior and aggression towards other kids and the woman couldn't control him at home either. She told me she refused to do what is necessary to get him under control because no one liked him, not even his grandmother, and she didn't want him to kill himself at 19 because no one liked him. If nothing else he was going to know his mother loved him so he wouldn't commit suicide. The fact that no one liked him because his behavior was atrocious didn't seem to faze her at all.

 

[loves to dive]

If kids can't be kids in Disney World, I'm not sure where they can be. I'm not suggesting that just anything goes, obviously, but I try really hard not to judge other families. I know with 100% certainty that there are times that my family must look like a complete disaster, and I hope people can be understanding of it. Just my take.

I agree with this to a point, I let mine be a kid when he was little (and even now when he's an adult we've been known to start dancing in public) but being a kid doesn't include being rude or mean. I'm of an age when it was o.k. to spank a child ( I know call the cops on me, I didn't say beat I said spank). Mine was known to run down the mall pretending he had a basketball and shooting hoops but you can bet if just once he ran in front of someone or ran into someone, he and I would have had a discussion about boundrys which might have included a visit to the bathroom. Of course, I also didn't explain why to him, he got the same thing I got, because I'm the mom and I said so. He got dirty, he played outside, he got hurt, he climbed trees, he played sports, he got in fights (can't tell you how many times I got called from school because he was standing up for someone else) he was all boy and got into trouble a lot, but he wouldn't have even thought about messing with a piano someone else was playing or taking something that wasn't his or kicking someone in line in front of him.

 

[HopperFan]

"For more than 30 years, Walt Disney World has donated the money from the wishing wells and fountains to children’s charities in Central Florida." So, yes, they were stealing donations and it was wrong. http://attractionsmagazine.com/18000-coins-help-make-wishes-come-true-local-children/

There is a reason the announcements from CMs now include something to the affect of "parents please supervise your children." because sadly too many of them are not doing just that. I feel bad for the CMs that have to put up with children who do not know how to behave and parents who let them. I get that it is vacation but there is never a vacation from parenting.

Kids are to be kids at Disney - that means squealing in delight when they meet their favorite character, running around the water playgrounds, having ice cream for lunch, rolling on the grass in the hub, dancing to music, singing along to their favorite songs, shooting bubbles in the air and trying to pop them ............ Being kids does not mean using outside voices inside, being disruptive, running around bumping in to people, rough play towards others, screaming in lines, refusing to sit at the dinner tables, not waiting their turn for characters, intruding in space such as the piano, entering restricted areas (fountains) etc, climbing on places they shouldn't. Two weeks ago actually saw a mother help her children climb to the top of the wall in the queue in Under the Sea then say "don't bump your head pumpkin" as he made it to the top where he had no business being.

Sadly allowing kids to behave inappropriately will transfer to school, work and other situations. Those children will probably grow up to the be adults we see losing it at Disney as well. Just back from 8 days in the parks and shocked at the behaviors we saw from kids and adults alike. Guest on Guest, Guest on CM, a punch to the face, a man yelling obscenities to a young man he did not know, who appeared to be disabled. Shocking behaviors that didn't just erupt when they became adults. It was rather sad.

 

[jawa7400]

DD4 was acting up while we were eating at Tony's on our last visit. Wouldn't sit still and kept getting out of her chair. It's pretty tight in there so she was in the way of other patrons and wait staff. DH took her outside around the corner and she got a spanking. She came back in and was so much better. We went on to have the best evening! We still laugh about that magical moment, but even at Disney where my kids get to do lots of things out of the ordinary (lots of treats, staying out late, etc) we still expect good behavior and I think it's important that our kids understand that.

 

[starjazz]

On my recent trip, we witnessed far more inappropriate behavior from parents than we did from their kids, and it wasn't even close.

 

[lovethattink]

OP, where was security during this?

Parenting. That's a hot topic.

 

[DCLogs]

We witnessed a mother letting here 3 kids,maybe 4-8 years old swim in the fountain at POR. Not just splashing but in trunks and swimming.

 

[pampam]

I did not see any security. And to be honest, I didn't think it was an issue for security. It was a time for good parenting. I believe that parenting does not take a vacation. Growing, learning is a continuous process and parenting is also. As a child matures and develops, they need less and less guidance, since they would have learned such things while growing up (with proper guidance and direction). It is so unfair to the child when the parents put that responsibility on their sons and daughters.

 

[Teacup53]

Last week I was in the Boneyard sand (gravel box) in the AK with my 4yo and a bunch of other smaller kids (all of them were pretty much younger than 5-6) and then two kids came in (about 7 & 10yo) and were picking up buckets of sand (ok, this stuff is really just very small gravel) and started throwing sand at each other and running around.

They came very close to knocking over some little ones and one child ended up with some sand in his face. His parents just took him and left the area. After about 5-10 minutes of them running back and forth and throwing buckets with no parents to be seen, I stepped in and told them it was "not OK behavior" and asked where their parents were , they said over on the other side, I told them to drop the buckets and go find their parents because throwing sand is not ok and if they can't play nice they can't play here. One woman started clapping - My child was far enough away (most of the time) not to be in the line of fire but that is just awful behavior and it was obvious that they thought it was ok because they were doing it, so someone needed to say it was not.

I kept waiting for the screaming parent to come back at me but nothing (thankfully) and I was able to keep playing peacefully with my little one.

 

[DSLRuser]

I will say, it seems that the behavior of young ones is getting worse. It's hard to keep my patience some times.

Because too many people only rely on "time outs" and are too worried about being "Besties" with their kids.

Now I am all for having a good relationship with your kids. But at some point you have to parent. And there has to be a next step when time outs dont work.

You may only have to spank your kid one time in their life, but the child will know what comes next if time outs dont correct behavior.

 

[JennaDeeDooDah]

I probably would have said something to the parents, polite but something none the less. I was sitting near the fountain in Morocco last time I was there and watched as two little boys fished for the coins in there. Mom and Dad thought it was cute until they say me looking then told the boys to stop (didn't tell them to put the money back). Didn't take the boys 1 minute to be back in there fishing. I went over and sat on the fountain and asked them if they knew that money was for poor people who couldn't afford to eat much less come to Disney and they were stealing. They looked at me sort of like are you crazy lady but stopped. Now, I don't really know what that money is for, for all I know the employees split it but I do know it wasn't theirs.

As a poster above stated, is goes to children's charities in Florida. A major one that they often give to is Give Kids the World. Basically, the people who take money from the fountain are taking money that would be going to charities for children with life-threatening illnesses. I've said something to kids taking money out of the fountain in front of American Adventure (mom was laughing and egging them on) and Gaston's Tavern (parents were looking at the map and not aware of what their children were doing). I find if you say it politely enough but also make sure that they are aware that the money goes to a charity, the kids are good about putting the money back.

 

[MaryLovesPoohBear]

If kids can't be kids in Disney World, I'm not sure where they can be. I'm not suggesting that just anything goes, obviously, but I try really hard not to judge other families. I know with 100% certainty that there are times that my family must look like a complete disaster, and I hope people can be understanding of it. Just my take.

There is a huge difference between allowing kids to be kids and allowing what has been listed here.

Of course, kids should be kids at Disney.

But of course, I should also feel safe to walk around and not get knocked over by a child zooming by. I should be able to eat my meal without a child screaming, literally, in my ear. And I should be able to listen to a piano player without a child demanding that they be the center of attention.

 

[Sadie22]

Last week I was in the Boneyard sand (gravel box) in the AK with my 4yo and a bunch of other smaller kids (all of them were pretty much younger than 5-6) and then two kids came in (about 7 & 10yo) and were picking up buckets of sand (ok, this stuff is really just very small gravel) and started throwing sand at each other and running around.

They came very close to knocking over some little ones and one child ended up with some sand in his face. His parents just took him and left the area. After about 5-10 minutes of them running back and forth and throwing buckets with no parents to be seen, I stepped in and told them it was "not OK behavior" and asked where their parents were , they said over on the other side, I told them to drop the buckets and go find their parents because throwing sand is not ok and if they can't play nice they can't play here. One woman started clapping - My child was far enough away (most of the time) not to be in the line of fire but that is just awful behavior and it was obvious that they thought it was ok because they were doing it, so someone needed to say it was not.

I kept waiting for the screaming parent to come back at me but nothing (thankfully) and I was able to keep playing peacefully with my little one.

I had to take a child to a doctor to have particles of sand removed from the eyes. Throwing sand is no laughing matter.

 

[Turn the Page]

We witnessed a mother letting here 3 kids,maybe 4-8 years old swim in the fountain at POR. Not just splashing but in trunks and swimming.

Perhaps she thought it was the kiddie pool?

Because too many people only rely on "time outs" and are too worried about being "Besties" with their kids.

Now I am all for having a good relationship with your kids. But at some point you have to parent. And there has to be a next step when time outs dont work.

You may only have to spank your kid one time in their life, but the child will know what comes next if time outs dont correct behavior.

It really does amaze me how many "parenting experts" out there now will just keep pushing the time outs as if it is the only possible discipline method. I am also amazed that so many people think there must always be a reason for the poor behavior. Oh my DD is defiant because she doesn't feel like she can control anything or my DS just has lots of energy and needs to be allowed to run around the table in the restaurant, etc. Sometimes, kids just act up because they know they can. In fact, I would venture to say that more often than not kids act up because they know they can get away with it. I'm not saying there aren't kids with genuine behavior problems, of course there are, but let's be real, too many parents have totally checked out of parenting, won't discipline, and are more interested in making sure their kid is happy all the time than in actually parenting.