Parents...make up your minds!

[cijay]

Having no kids of my own...please explain the reasoning...

Child, approx. 6 left in our toys area while "mummy is going to do some shopping." Half an hour later, 6year old is wandering around in tears. I told her to come up to the front with me and we'll page her. (We don't take children's hands unless they take ours first, we have a special bench we have them sit on at thye front.) 6year old ran up to the front, I walked behind. By the time we got to the front other was doing the magpie (that's what I call the honey Boo Boo's mother type of mannerisms) calling the kid's name. She ran to her mother, I followed to make sure she's in her mother's care again. Mother said to thee kid "I told you never take anyone else's hand!" I just jokingly said "do you think I can keep up with her?" Kid said "she works here." (apron, vest and nametag). Motther said "It doesn't matter, people are crazy, they work everywhere." (In my head I said "yes and some abandon their kids for 1/2hr. Does the name Adam Walsh mean anything to you?")

A few months back, a little boy (not yet 3) came riding down the escalator, sitting on the step until it got too low then he stood up, jumped off and ran to the up one and did it again. I asked the lady at the coffee shop I was at if she might call security, there was so many things wrong with this picture. Security came to me and said "oh, it's okay, his parents are actually at the top watching him." Do they want to watch him get a part of his body or clothing trapped in mechanical equipment? Or would thy rather watch as someone grabs him and pulls him out that door right next to the escalator out onto the busy city sidewalk? Why bother watching him at all. There's a Starbucks right there, why not just go for a coffee and tell him to come find you after he is finished playing on a mechanical beast that can eat your child for breakfast if something malfunctions?

Third, mother left 5 year old at a food court table while she went WAAAY (about as far as she could get) to McDonalds. They had been shopping and the little girl pulled a toy out of the bag, I asked "what'd you get?" She showed me a little fishing pond game. Mother came over "I told you never to talk to strangers!" Little girl said (kids are SO smart!) "I didn't I just showed her . "It doesn't matter. You don't KNOW her!" Yes, lady, you were the one who left your kid out to these wolves you fear. The food court is in an area where it's pretty easy to buy anything from a joint to a gun. While I know the kid is no more at risk than anywhere else (as a matter of fact I have no doubt if there WAS a predator who tried to make off with her, all the "freaks" there would make mincemeat out of them) but what could have gone on around her? A bad deal over drugs or a gun. As i left, I said to her "you know, people who kidnap children freak when the children talk to other people for fear they'll talk."

 

[BadgerGirl84]

It sounds like you've met some quality nominees for Mothers of The Year. (sarcasm). Each example is pretty appalling and shocking to me.

Where do you work? A mall?

 

[CPanther95]

You don't need to have kids of your own to know what you already know. Some people are morons, and there's no parenting test.

But on a side note, just as a mini-PSA regarding escalators. It's not the mean looking "jaws" at the bottom you need to most worry about with little ones (or even yourself), it's the gap between the stairs and the stationary side all the way down and up you need to worry about. Tip of a sneaker gets caught just right in there and it can cause some devastating injuries. Keep your feet away from the edge and keep the little ones in the middle of an escalator.

 

[luvsJack]

Honestly kids are much more in danger from the people they know than strangers.

But, I do think that some parents are just so sure their kids are safe because they know to "never talk to strangers" that they become complacent in their supervision of their children.

The escalator would bother me a whole lot more than thinking this kid was going to get grabbed.

 

[CPanther95]

We were just at the airport a couple weeks ago and they were treating a man that had fallen down about the last half of an escalator. His face looked like someone ran over it with a lawn aerator.

 

[Breezy_Carol]

I was on the moving sidewalk at the airport. There was a small child near me with mother talking on a cell phone. We get to the end and she is talking and oblivious. Child's shoe lace got stuck in the in the the walkway - similar to the bottom of the escalator. Mom did nothing. I grabbed the kids foot and pulled to break the shoelace and free the child. I am surprised Mom didn't get mad that I broke the lace. She never even stopped.

 

[DiannaVM]

I don't understand how some people can be so careless with their kids, but then want to chew you out because you were doing something to protect them (i.e. talking to them, letting security that the child seems to be unsupervised, etc.). Drives me crazy.

I was just telling my sister this the other day. We were at our church for an event, and the hall where the event was has many different exits, including a secluded hallway to the restrooms. I watched in disbelief as kids 7 and younger were allowed to run all over the hall, even into the hallway (which would keep them out of site) and no one was trying to do anything to stop them. Not only was the place packed with tables and chairs (and people!) so the running around was actually disruptive to other attendees, it was dangerous because at any moment any person could come in right from the street (which did happen on this night). I guess the parents felt confident because its a church function, but I wouldn't get so complacent knowing that sometimes is the people you KNOW that do stuff to kids, let alone complete strangers you don't know from Adam. I am a Sunday School teacher so sometimes the kids like to trail behind me or sit with me in church, and I wouldn't dare let them out of my sight while under my care. They sometimes protest but every time they ask to use the bathroom I go with them, because you just never know. If I am like that with strangers' kids, it is difficult for me to fathom that some parents just seem too secure in leaving kids to their own devices, especially young ones.

 

[Tiffylv]

.

 

[loves to dive]

I must look very motherly and not scary because I've had at least 5 kids come up to me at grocery stores and malls and tell me they were lost and could I help. The last time I was in the grocery section of Wal-Mart just walking around with my buggy. A cute little boy about 5 very calmly came up to me and asked me if I had seen his mother and described her (very well I might add) to me. I hadn't so I asked him when the last time he saw her. It was a couple of isles over. O.k. I said, lets walk over there and see if we can find her and if we can't we'll get someone who works here to page her. I didn't want to ask him to hold my hand because I didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable so I asked him to hold on to my buggy. He very calmly did and we walked over the last place he saw her and she wasn't there. O.k. sweety lets find someone who works here and have them page her. O.k. he says and we found someone who worked there, both of us walked him up front and she paged his mom. I stayed with him the whole time since he seemed to have bonded with me. When mom showed up she was more mad at him for wandering off then happy to see him but she didn't yell at him or spank him so I was good. I don't think he wandered off, I'm more inclined to think she did and just didn't notice he wasn't with her. He very politely thanked me for taking care of him and went off with mom, who still wasn't holding the little guy's hand. He was so composed and not scared or upset, I was very impressed since I think had I been in the same situation I would have been crying my eyes out. Kids wander off, I have a grown one but I remember those days so I understand they can be fast little devils but I also think some parents just shouldn't have kids.

 

[wilkeliza]

This still reminds me of the family that left their child at Epcot for 3 hours while they drank in Mexico. They got him an Agent P phone "after dinner" and told him that he could keep playing until the fire works but needed to stay in the country they were in. After the fireworks we got a lost child report on the CM radios and the information we were given was child last seen x time in Mexico age 5 years! Who the F leaves a 5 year old on their own. It had been roughly 3 hours since they had seen their kid and the kid was playing the Agent P game so didn't know he was lost.

Also the set of kids who got left in Ineventions while their parents walked around the World Showcase. They were under 7 and I think my friend said there were 4 or 5 kids. Their parents thought Ineventions was a babysitting service so just left the kids there.

 

[Allison]

I have to ask...What does the "make up your minds" title have to do with the subject? Sorry, I've been wondering this since I read it.

 

[srferson]

I have to ask...What does the "make up your minds" title have to do with the subject? Sorry, I've been wondering this since I read it.

I kind of took it as saying if people are so dangerous then don't leave your kid alone around a bunch of them.
And if people feel it's safe enough to leave their kid alone somewhere, then why freak out when they so much as look at a 'stranger'?

Either world = evil, in which case you should stay with your kid.
Or world = reasonably safe, in which case you shouldn't act like everyone is out to hurt your kid.

Make up your mind.

That's how I took it anyway...

 

[HM]

3 year old left at Boneyard area of AK. Started following us around. After about 20 minutes we were ready to go do something else, still no parent in sight. Took her to a CM to explain the situation. Dad showed up about 10 minutes later. He'd gone to ride Dinosaur.

 

[Luv Bunnies]

I have to ask...What does the "make up your minds" title have to do with the subject? Sorry, I've been wondering this since I read it.

I think the OP is wondering why people leave their kids in unsafe situations, and then except them not to talk to strangers when people try to intervene. I do think some parents are way too liberal with what they allow their kids to do. I've seen this happen everyday at the elementary school where I work. We have specific rules that the kids know they have to follow. It's not OK to stand on the picnic tables or benches. No running in the hallways, ever. They can only go feet first down the slide, sitting on their bottoms. They may not jump from the top of the play structure.

The minute their parents show up at dismissal, all rules go out the window. Parents let their kids do whatever they want. My class (preschool) is on a different schedule than the rest of the school. There are times when they older grades have been dismissed and our afternoon class is still in session. Even though parents are told they need to collect their kids and leave the campus, some will hang around to chat with each other while their kids play. I've seen parents sitting in groups at the picnic tables while the kids run across the table tops, jumping from table to table. Other kids are flying down slides head first, or climbing to the top and jumping down. Some kids have races in the hallways. Once my teacher opened our door to let our kids out for recess and almost smacked the door into a kid who was running by. We have yellow half-circles painted on the ground to indicate where the doors open. Even our preschools know not to walk through them. A mom yelled to my teacher, "Be careful! There are kids out here." Really? 1) Your kid has been dismissed from school and shouldn't be here. 2) Your kid is running the hallway right in front of our door. That's against the rules. 3) Our kids are still in school and we have every right to open our door to take them out to recess. 4) Please go home and let your kids run wild there! I've even had the nerve to tell kids to stop breaking a rule on campus when they're parents are nearby only to have them say, "It's OK. I'm watching them." Watching them break safety rules? OK.

 

[mom2rtk]

I kind of took it as saying if people are so dangerous then don't leave your kid alone around a bunch of them.
And if people feel it's safe enough to leave their kid alone somewhere, then why freak out when they so much as look at a 'stranger'?

Either world = evil, in which case you should stay with your kid.
Or world = reasonably safe, in which case you shouldn't act like everyone is out to hurt your kid.

Make up your mind.

That's how I took it anyway...

If that's the case, then the OP needs to understand that parents are not a monolithic group. The parents who would leave a child unattended at the mall are probably not the same ones complaining about stranger danger.

 

[CPanther95]

If that's the case, then the OP needs to understand that parents are not a monolithic group. The parents who would leave a child unattended at the mall are probably not the same ones complaining about stranger danger.

Except in these examples, they were.

 

[srferson]

If that's the case, then the OP needs to understand that parents are not a monolithic group. The parents who would leave a child unattended at the mall are probably not the same ones complaining about stranger danger.

As PP said, these stories are about exactly those types of parents. They are certainly out there.

I do think I understand what you're saying though. Perhaps a better title would have been something like 'Some parents really need to make up their minds!'

I don't imagine the OP intended to aim the comment at all parents. (Though, I'm not the OP, so I can't say that for sure.)

 

[Hrhpd]

Having no kids of my own...please explain the reasoning...

Child, approx. 6 left in our toys area while "mummy is going to do some shopping." Half an hour later, 6year old is wandering around in tears. I told her to come up to the front with me and we'll page her. (We don't take children's hands unless they take ours first, we have a special bench we have them sit on at thye front.) 6year old ran up to the front, I walked behind. By the time we got to the front other was doing the magpie (that's what I call the honey Boo Boo's mother type of mannerisms) calling the kid's name. She ran to her mother, I followed to make sure she's in her mother's care again. Mother said to thee kid "I told you never take anyone else's hand!" I just jokingly said "do you think I can keep up with her?" Kid said "she works here." (apron, vest and nametag). Motther said "It doesn't matter, people are crazy, they work everywhere." (In my head I said "yes and some abandon their kids for 1/2hr. Does the name Adam Walsh mean anything to you?")

A few months back, a little boy (not yet 3) came riding down the escalator, sitting on the step until it got too low then he stood up, jumped off and ran to the up one and did it again. I asked the lady at the coffee shop I was at if she might call security, there was so many things wrong with this picture. Security came to me and said "oh, it's okay, his parents are actually at the top watching him." Do they want to watch him get a part of his body or clothing trapped in mechanical equipment? Or would thy rather watch as someone grabs him and pulls him out that door right next to the escalator out onto the busy city sidewalk? Why bother watching him at all. There's a Starbucks right there, why not just go for a coffee and tell him to come find you after he is finished playing on a mechanical beast that can eat your child for breakfast if something malfunctions?

Third, mother left 5 year old at a food court table while she went WAAAY (about as far as she could get) to McDonalds. They had been shopping and the little girl pulled a toy out of the bag, I asked "what'd you get?" She showed me a little fishing pond game. Mother came over "I told you never to talk to strangers!" Little girl said (kids are SO smart!) "I didn't I just showed her . "It doesn't matter. You don't KNOW her!" Yes, lady, you were the one who left your kid out to these wolves you fear. The food court is in an area where it's pretty easy to buy anything from a joint to a gun. While I know the kid is no more at risk than anywhere else (as a matter of fact I have no doubt if there WAS a predator who tried to make off with her, all the "freaks" there would make mincemeat out of them) but what could have gone on around her? A bad deal over drugs or a gun. As i left, I said to her "you know, people who kidnap children freak when the children talk to other people for fear they'll talk."

First off - The Rule

Secondly, it seems you work in retail in a store that attracts families as it has a toy area and is located in a rather large dual story mall. I have to say, given those circumstances, I find it quite refreshing that you only have 1 irresponsible parent story (escalator) and two questionable irresponsible parent stories. I would think with the amount of families that visit a mall, that you would be filled with bad parent stories every day rather than having to reach back a few months ago and stories that are much worse than somebody leaving a k/1st grader at a table while they went and purchased food.

Where do you live where you can buy drug and guns in the mall?

 

[leebee]

I took the title to mean... If strangers are so dangerous for kids to be around, why do these parents leave their kids alone around strangers? Make up your minds! Either strangers are dangerous so you need to keep your kids with you, or strangers aren't dangerous and it's OK for your kids to be alone around them and talk to them.

 

[NewRVLady]

OP- it's odd that 2 of the Mothers were upset that you were around their kids
Even tho you wear name tags and have an Apron
Maybe let someone else deal with the lost kids at your job?