Don't put em in the oven & call em biscuits

minkydog

DIS Cast Member
Joined
Dec 8, 2004
My dear husband decided to bake biscuits for me this morning because I have a long home visit to do this morning. He was so excited. When the timer went off I heard him say, "shoot!" Or the non-DIS equivalent. He had laid 6 frozen biscuits directly on the oven rack. As they warmed, they sagged through the rack onto the bottom of the oven.

Just curious,guys...what would make someone NOT use a pan??
 
People unused to cooking can do funny things. When my mother was in the hospital having my brother (and week long stays were common 60+ years ago) my dad decided to bake a cake.

He thought that if a little baking powder made it rise, a lot would make it rise more. Yup. It was a brick.
 
Totally sounds like something my DH would do. :rotfl2:

Once, he'd been out in the yard all day and came in and "helped" me by patting out the hamburgers to go on the grill. I asked him about halfway in if he'd washed his hands, and he said, "Why would I wash my hands before handling raw meat?" :confused3

Poor guy. I had to throw that meat out and go get more.
 


My dear husband decided to bake biscuits for me this morning because I have a long home visit to do this morning. He was so excited. When the timer went off I heard him say, "shoot!" Or the non-DIS equivalent. He had laid 6 frozen biscuits directly on the oven rack. As they warmed, they sagged through the rack onto the bottom of the oven.

Just curious,guys...what would make someone NOT use a pan??

In all fairness, did these biscuits come with directions or were they ignored? Oh wait, he would not have read them anyway, right? Or you could be like my dh. He has to call me with every step by step detail.

:lmao:
 
One of our DD's close friends (more like a 3rd daughter to us) slept over and she wanted to make me tea in the morning....a very nice gesture but when I came downstairs I smelled plastic burning.....poor thing didn't realize our tea kettle that was on the counter was electric and put the kettle on the burner. The whole plastic base melted onto the stove. She felt awful. Kiddingly, I said...did you not see the cord attached to the outlet?????

MJ
 
My dear husband decided to bake biscuits for me this morning because I have a long home visit to do this morning. He was so excited. When the timer went off I heard him say, "shoot!" Or the non-DIS equivalent. He had laid 6 frozen biscuits directly on the oven rack. As they warmed, they sagged through the rack onto the bottom of the oven.

Just curious,guys...what would make someone NOT use a pan??

Can't answer your question. But, this did crack me up!
 


It was sweet of him to try. Why, just two days ago.he.tried.to.make.me some.corn dogs. He read the directions.then tossed.them.aside. First, he microwaved the corn dogs.for.a.couple minutes.then put them in toaster(!) Needless to.say, they were black in just a minute or so.

DH is not unknowlegeable about cooking. He just gets these ideas, then gets tired and tries to take shortcuts. The biscuits and corn dogs STILL can't top his Asparagus Lasagna.
 
It was sweet of him to try. Why, just two days ago.he.tried.to.make.me some.corn dogs. He read the directions.then tossed.them.aside. First, he microwaved the corn dogs.for.a.couple minutes.then put them in toaster(!) Needless to.say, they were black in just a minute or so.

DH is not unknowlegeable about cooking. He just gets these ideas, then gets tired and tries to take shortcuts. The biscuits and corn dogs STILL can't top his Asparagus Lasagna.

Oh come on share , please? :lmao:
 
My dear husband decided to bake biscuits for me this morning because I have a long home visit to do this morning. He was so excited. When the timer went off I heard him say, "shoot!" Or the non-DIS equivalent. He had laid 6 frozen biscuits directly on the oven rack. As they warmed, they sagged through the rack onto the bottom of the oven.

Just curious,guys...what would make someone NOT use a pan??

LOL..this one made me laugh..your poor hubby, at least he tried..to answer your ?, some men are just culinarily challenged! Second answer..men NEVER read the instructions!

Happy Easter to you and your family, I hope Christian is still doing well!
 
My dear husband decided to bake biscuits for me this morning because I have a long home visit to do this morning. He was so excited. When the timer went off I heard him say, "shoot!" Or the non-DIS equivalent. He had laid 6 frozen biscuits directly on the oven rack. As they warmed, they sagged through the rack onto the bottom of the oven.

Just curious,guys...what would make someone NOT use a pan??

What's wrong, camera not working?

lol
 
some men are just culinary challenged

Lack of culinary skills isn't limited to men.

My ex-wife once offered to make me a hamburger while I was working in the yard.

When she called me to tell me it was ready, I thought I must have lost track of time..no way she could have cooked it so quickly.

Sure enough, I bit into what was essentially raw meat. Once the outside was brown, she assumed the burger was ready.
 
My stepdad tries to help out every Thanksgiving. I walk into the kitchen to find the oven set on 500. He thinks by turning up the temp, the food will cook faster.
 
Thanks for the laugh Minky! :lmao:

I did something like that once. I tried to make chocolate chip cookies from scratch but was out of brown sugar, so I substituted with maple syrup. I think I miiight have put in just a liiiiitle more baking soda than I should have, because when they were done, they were biscuits. :rotfl:
 
Many years a go a newly married friend had a wife with not much experience. She defrosted a roast in the dishwasher. Not sure it turned out. He was not much better in the kitchen.
 
My husband (before we were married) made CHICKEN in the oven without a pan!

I walked into his apartment and there was grease "hanging in the air." I asked him what on earth happened and finally figured out he had cooked chicken straight on the oven rack.

Even worse, he still didn't believe me that this wasn't okay and he did it again! We rented an apartment a few months before the wedding and he went ahead and moved in first. It was all clean and new so I warned him not to DARE cook chicken like that or I'd be furious. He did. I was. He's never done it again.

If you asked him today, he'd still defend it as perfectly reasonable because that's how you do it outside on the grill.
 
My dad has a famous incident where he cooked the frozen pizza on the cardboard tray it came packaged on....
 

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