The great debate should we or shouldn't we go

[sdoll]

I booked a 7 night trip to go during free dining. We are spoiled and have been lucky enough to go to Disney about every year for the past 4 years. We have already been once this year and decided since we knew we were coming back we would purchase the 10 day no expire tickets. I booked us at POP and our total for my family is a little over 700 dollars. Here is the kicker. My husband just got a new job he said he was going to tell them that we had a vacation already booked but he chickened out and did not ask. I love my husband dearly but he is one of those people that always puts his work first. (don't flame or think I am mean for the last 10 years we worked for the same company so I know the expectations) I admire his work ethic but we will be working for a long time I believe in taking a break and enjoying our kids while we can. So do you think I should push him to ask for the time off or just wait until next year.

 

[rockyroad]

An employed husband is more important than a trip to
see the mouse.

If he didn't feel comfortable asking for time off, then perhaps he was picking up on their expectations and did the right thing.

 

[asmit4]

Depends on the job. If he feels he can ask without issue, but he is still too nervous- then push him to ask. If he feels this new job is not a place he can ask for the time off, then he shouldn't.

I bet they will offer free DDP, or something similar next fall. Perhaps you could just wait til Sept. 2009 to go when he has been there longer.

 

[shortbun]

If he didn't negotiate it with their original agreement, I'd leave it alone. He should be the barometer for that issue. Don't push it. Bank your trip money and plan again for next year.

 

[JoyG]

In this economy I would say the job takes priority. I would reschedule your trip for another time.

 

[dcfromva]

Here is the kicker. My husband just got a new job he said he was going to tell them that we had a vacation already booked but he chickened out and did not ask. I love my husband dearly but he is one of those people that always puts his work first. (don't flame or think I am mean for the last 10 years we worked for the same company so I know the expectations) I admire his work ethic but we will be working for a long time I believe in taking a break and enjoying our kids while we can. So do you think I should push him to ask for the time off or just wait until next year.

sdoll,
Is your vacation planned in Sept (4 months from now)? Is this a new job within the same company or a new company? Does your DH earn vacation time? Will your DH have earned enough vacation time to take a vacation? Does he want to go on this vacation? Could you possibly scale back your 7 nights vacation to something over a long weekend? Could you and the kids go 7 nights and your DH join you over a long weekend?

A lot depends on the answers to the questions above. If your DH does not want to go on this vacation (for whatever reason), I would not push him.

 

[luv2nascar]

Is he entitled to vacation time then if not stay home and keep the job.

 

[DawnM]

I agree with the other posters. He may have felt a vibe not to ask. I would talk to him again and ask him what he thinks he wants to do about this (will he ask later for the time off or does he want to cancel for this year?)

Disney will still be there next year.

Dawn

 

[carj]

I guess you will have to figure out if he was picking up on the vibe of the employers or if he just doesn't want to take time off. My husband will not take time off unless practically forced to do so. He loves his job, works a ton and is perfectly happy. We has taken off from work 5 times in the entire 11 years that I have known him for more than a single day. He is going to lose about 10 days of vacation time in August but he is happy so I am not going to push it.

Here were the times he took off:
Honeymoon 2000
Broke both elbows AT WORK, he is in technology...long story, took off 2 days
Son born 2001, took off 2 days
Daughter born 2003
Vacation 2007 took off 3 days

This summer, in 27 days!!! we are going to Disney. He will be attending a conference for 4 of the 7 days that we are there so with the weekends, he is only actually taking off 1 day.

So...all I am saying is that you know your husband. If he is typically willing to take off and go on vacation, then don't push it. If he is more like my husband, you may have to encourage him a little more!

 

[crisi]

I wouldn't.

Most people around here know that few "outsiders" understand "Disney every year" - and you are talking "Disney twice a year."

To expect a new employer to let you go for vacation AFTER you take the job is a big deal (appropriately, if he were going to ask, it should have been a condition of accepting the job - asking now is bad form - if he worked for me it would be a mark in the "no" column for getting through a probationary period - asking as part of acceptance is neutral). Having your coworkers discover the vacation you NEEDED to take was a repeat of the Disney vacation he tooke once this year already that he takes every year is likely to give him a reputation at work he doesn't want.

 

[dvcgirl]

I agree, the time to ask for vacation time is during the interview process, not after the job has been offered and accepted. Asking for time off now could come across as sort of sneaky in my opinion. I wouldn't want to start off a new job under those circumstances.

 

[RayJay]

I booked a 7 night trip to go during free dining. We are spoiled and have been lucky enough to go to Disney about every year for the past 4 years. We have already been once this year and decided since we knew we were coming back we would purchase the 10 day no expire tickets. I booked us at POP and our total for my family is a little over 700 dollars. Here is the kicker. My husband just got a new job he said he was going to tell them that we had a vacation already booked but he chickened out and did not ask. I love my husband dearly but he is one of those people that always puts his work first. (don't flame or think I am mean for the last 10 years we worked for the same company so I know the expectations) I admire his work ethic but we will be working for a long time I believe in taking a break and enjoying our kids while we can. So do you think I should push him to ask for the time off or just wait until next year.

I don't really see a problem with this, happens all the time at my company, and I and think that is the key, depends on the company.

If you think the company is flexible then go.

RayJay

 

[eeyorethegreat]

I agree with the other posters these times are way to shaky to be putting a vacation before secure employment. You have been lucky to go every year the last 4 years count it as a blessing and plan for another trip when it makes the most sense for your family and less stressful for your husband. Someone else mentioned that your DH could earn a poor reputation far going on vacation so soon after taking a new job. That is not the environment he would want to work in and I am sure you wouldn't want him to either. Th next few months at this job is about proving his value to the new company you don't want to do anything to damage his perceived value. It's had to have to cancel a trip especially to WDW and especially if you have already told the kids but in this case other things need to take priorities. Plan a long weekend trip with your family closer to home you would be surprised the magical memories you can make even without Disney. It'll give you a chance to relax and enjoy each other and then you can start planning your next WDW trip when it is more convenient for everyone, you'll enjoy it more that way.

 

[rie'smom]

Don't push him. He has to feel comfortable.
An alternative would be for you to go w/out him. I'm a SAHM and if DH is in a busy season or just can't get off work, my daughter and I go by ourselves. Her first trip was when she was not quite 3 and she and I went alone. We had a great time. She's 14 now and out of the 10 or so WD trips, DH has been on 4.

 

[Cindy B]

Don't push him. He has to feel comfortable.
An alternative would be for you to go w/out him. I'm a SAHM and if DH is in a busy season or just can't get off work, my daughter and I go by ourselves. Her first trip was when she was not quite 3 and she and I went alone. We had a great time. She's 14 now and out of the 10 or so WD trips, DH has been on 4.

I was going to suggest that as well. What is to stop the 3 of them going? I'd do the same.. especially if the job situation is what it is.

 

[ilovefh]

I'd say if he was just too nervous, why not just ask. Asking can't hurt. If he got the vibe that it was not alright then that is one thing, but if he is like me and was nervous during the interview, maybe he forgot. My Dfiance started a new job last August and forgot to ask about a vacation in Feb that was already planned and paid for. He asked after the fact and it was no problem. Now if you think they would fire you just for asking, then don't. But I don't see why just asking would be a problem. As long as it was asking and not telling. Why not say "My wife wants to take a vacation in Sept, I was wondering if I could get a few days off, if not no big deal."

 

[victorandbellasmom]

I agree with some of the previous posters. If dh did not disclose the upcoming trip when he interviewed, then I'm not so sure if he should ask now. dcfromva gave you some good questions to ask yourself.

My dh started a new job this past September. When he interviewed for the job, he made sure to tell the new company that we had a trip to disneyland planned in the beginning of October and if they wanted him, he couldn't cancel his trip. His new company had no problem giving him a week off after only starting 3 weeks before. And surprisingly 2 ouf the 5 workdays he missed was paid vacation which we weren't expecting.

Disney will be there next year.

 

[PatriciaH]

Should you tell the employer in the interview or when they make an offer? We were always told when they make the offer tell them about any vacation plans. I am starting a new job the first week of June and asked them when they made the offer if taking my trip to Europe was OK in September. I told them the job came first and if I had to cancel the trip I would. They told me I better take it, to enjoy and not to worry at all. I think I will really like working for this new place.

 

[victorandbellasmom]

Should you tell the employer in the interview or when they make an offer? We were always told when they make the offer tell them about any vacation plans. I am starting a new job the first week of June and asked them when they made the offer if taking my trip to Europe was OK in September. I told them the job came first and if I had to cancel the trip I would. They told me I better take it, to enjoy and not to worry at all. I think I will really like working for this new place.

You're correct, tell them when they make an offer. Dh had a multiple interviews with his current company and i got confused as to when he told them. He did tell them when he got the offer and it wasn't a problem.

 

[Kellydelly]

He can request the time off, if his new job includes vacation time. Why not? If they can't spare him that week, then cancel the trip. It doesn't hurt to ask! I personally feel life is short, enjoy it while you have your health and family intact!