The Eco Tour aka What was I thinking?!

[Regina]

“Get to know Castaway Cay like a native! A knowledgeable guide will take you on a fascinating eco adventure via a personal watercraft as you learn about the area’s abundant marine life, unique ecology and storied history.”

Sounds good! I’ve been on the Water Mice/Sprites at Disney World, no problem. There’s a guide, Mickey gives it a thumbs up, we should do this.

There we were on May 15th. Me, the one who had the bright idea to do this tour, my husband and our daughter and we’re ready to go. The sun is shining, it’s a perfect day at Castaway Cay and it’s time for our Eco Tour.

First, we get our life jackets and then we get instructions. What does the fist in the air mean again? Slashing motion across the neck means stop? Are you sure that we’re not in the middle of a Charlie Brown cartoon where he’s giving stage directions?

I think I remember all of the instructions, and now it’s time to get on our “personal watercraft.” We get in the water and are told that you climb on from the back. Okay, the stupid thing is in waist deep water and they expect a chubby, middle aged lady to hop on. I decide to use the very professional lift the knee and crawl on method, hoping that no one with a camera is behind me.

I did it, I’m on. Put the safety strap around my wrist, check. Don’t get within 50 feet of the watercraft in front of me, check. Don’t start until I’m told, check. Just press this little button, put one finger on the throttle and OMIGOD, WHAT DID I GET MYSELF INTO!! I’m going to get whiplash, I’m going to fall off, I hate this and everyone ahead of me is becoming a tiny speck on the horizon.

Yikes, they’re going around the front of the ship. Yikes, there are people behind me, I must catch up. Yikes, there goes my visor. Fat chance I’m going to stop to get it. Yikes, I don’t like this; I don’t like this at all.

When we reached an open area, the people behind me passed me by. Being that it was a Disney excursion, no one made any gestures in my direction; at least I don’t think that they did. I was too busy praying to all of the saints and my ancestors to look around.

Luckily, there’s a guide at both the front and the rear. Byron, the guide in the back and now my new best friend, takes me under his wing and encourages me to catch up with the rest of the group. I make it to the other side of the Magic and in front of Castaway Cay. Everyone has stopped and the guide tells us something about the trees. I wish I could remember what he said, but I was too busy looking for an amphibious taxi to drive up and get me out of this. The odds weren’t good.

Oh yippee, we’re going to explore some more. Push the button, 50 feet, finger on throttle; they can’t possibly hear what I’m saying over the sound of the engines. I hope no one can read lips. I really hate this.

Next, we stop at a sand bar about a mile and a half out. Up until now, I thought that I was going to fall off and sink 100 fathoms down. (I don’t know what a fathom is, but it sounds nautical and deep.) Considering that I have a life jacket on, this is unlikely, but panic does this to me.

We get off the “personal watercraft” and walk on the sandbar. The guide asks us what we think the sand is made of and tells us to scoop up a handful and sniff it. You know this is the part that he enjoys, its fish poop. Great, I have a handful of poop, I’m a mile and a half out, and I have to get on the dreaded jet ski again. There’s one bright spot, the water in that area is only 4 to 12 feet deep. If I go flying off, maybe I can walk back.

Climb back on from the rear, threaten husband with death if he takes a picture, 50 feet, finger on throttle, hey, where are they going now? Swell, they’re going all around the cove next to the ship. Byron, my best buddy, knows that if I follow the others I’ll be spending the night at his house since it will take me 8 hours to do this. We take the short cut and head back around the ship to the shore.

I did it! I pry my hands off of the controls, hop off (from the rear) and practically walk on the water for the 8 feet between me and the beach. I would have kissed the ground but I know better. Can’t fool me, its fish poop.

Truthfully, most everyone loved it. Some, like me, were surprised at how fast we went, but I was the only one who made a vow to eat my vegetables and always brush and floss if I got back to shore in one piece.

If you go on this tour, be prepared for speed. These are jet skis. You can’t go rocketing off on your own, but you will definitely move, and learn something about trees and fish poop.

[lovinaz]

Thanks for sharing that hilarious story, it really brightened up my day! :rotfl2:

[NEM]

“If you go on this tour, be prepared for speed. These are jet skis. You can’t go rocketing off on your own, but you will definitely move, and learn something about trees and fish poop.

LOL...that is a fairly accurate representation of the trip... :rotfl:

Actually I loved it. I went prepared to not go fast, which is what I had heard about it. So, I was very suprised we went as fast as we did. We were jumping waves, getting splashed...and went what I would call FAST!!!!
I thought it was great.

However, my mothers interpretation was very similar to your own..

Imagine if you will my mother, walks with a crutch 60-something and her 50-something younger sister (it was a 2 seater) holding on for dear life on one of the jet skis until it was over. They were worried that if they fell off, they would never get back on in the middle of the water!!! They were also buddies with Byron by the end of the first leg....LOL. I thought my mom was going to cry. But at the end, they said they were not sure they would do it again, but it was fun.

But I dont know who wrote before that it did not go fast....because that was wrong!!!!

Funny writing....thanks for the laugh

Michelle aka NEM

[Az Pirates]

LOVE the report!

I was thinking the same thing about all the hand signals. I listened to the safety speech while waiting to get some pics of my guys as they headed out to scoop fish poop. :fish:
9 yr. old Tanner got a huge kick out of that!

For the speed demons out there... my DH & DS said they had more fun on the way back since they made sure they were at the front of the pack and able to 'catch some air' They were at the back behind the slooow folks on the way out.
Not on the same tour as Regina ;)

We miss seeing our cruisin' neighbors! :wave:


I opted for the 'don't think about it - just get strapped in and go' parasailing excursion that day.

[khoffman923]

:rotfl2: Your excursion summary had me in stitches. It was like reading an Erma Bombeck story (for those of you who don't know who she is, do a google search and read her books if you want a good laugh about life). Thanks so much for that.

Karen :thewave:

[jillane88]

Loved, loved, loved, reading your story. Actually I think I may want to do that excursion now after reading your hilarious account of it. I just don't think I'll be scooping any poop!

Heather :earsboy: :earsgirl: princess: :earboy2: :earboy2:

[Jcrlynn]

JUST THE BEST EVER!!! :Pinkbounc I might not post a lot but I read alot you have put tears in my eyes I was laughing so hard my kids think I am really going :crazy: now great report tell us more about your trip :banana: :banana: Sailing again on the wonder june 19 I will think of you on the Beach :rotfl: :rotfl: Have a Great summer.
Lynn :wave: :wave:

[Regina]

Oh sure, laugh at my expense. ;) :teeth:

NEM, I feel much better knowing that I wasn't the only one who was considering adopting Byron at the end of the tour. If it wasn't for him, I'd still be out there waiting to be airlifted from the sand bar. "Guys, hello, come and get me...guys, please don't sail away, help me."

AZ Pirates, I'm glad that your crew wasn't on my tour. I'd have to spend the following two weeks being laughed at by a 9 year old: "Look Daddy, there's the crazy lady." :crazy:

My poor DH tried to get alongside me and gave me a "darling dearest, is there something wrong" look. Even though our youngest is 20, he remembered seeing the same gaze of death that I sent in his direction when I was in labor. He knew to stay away from me or risk bodily harm.

I "chose poorly." :teeth: :teeth: :teeth:

[nativetxn]

LOL, Regina! I don't think this tour is for me. You made me laugh!

Katholyn

[Mackey Mouse]

I am so sorry but I cannot stop laughing here.. the visualization of this whole thing and knowing Regina as I do... I can see the whole thing. I wish Gary had the camera with him....the blackmail would have been a wonderful way to raise money for my next trip. Just kidding. :rotfl: :rotfl:

[PizzieDuster]

ROTFLMAO!

My DH just came in from a jog and found me here cracking up! He read it and said, "yeah, that's SOOOOO you!"

He had a good jog! I had a good laugh. Amen. Thank you very much! :rotfl2:

[JenKatt]

My poor DH tried to get alongside me and gave me a "darling dearest, is there something wrong" look. Even though our youngest is 20, he remembered seeing the same gaze of death that I sent in his direction when I was in labor. He knew to stay away from me or risk bodily harm.

I "chose poorly." :teeth: :teeth: :teeth:

That's what Konk Koolers are for....

[2canadianfans]

The funniest thing I have read on the boards !! Oh the memories you will have..sharon

[Q's My Princess]

Thanks Regina!!

That was one of the best trip reports!! :rotfl2: :rotfl2:

[Regina]

Even though I was the one who suggested we do this, I'm determined to find a way to blame DH. I could use the "he could have said no" tactic, but that would mean that he actually listened when I spoke. :teeth:

Or I could simply say it was his fault. Any wife will accept that at face value. ;)

[Muushka]

You are a great writer!

Thanks for the laughs/story/warning! :rotfl2:

[ChrizJen]

:rotfl2: :rotfl: :rotfl2: :rotfl: :rotfl2: :rotfl: :rotfl2:

That's about all I can say right now...*sigh*

That was great!!!
-Christal

[mississaugamom]

:rotfl2: Thanks for a great "trip report"!!! :rotfl: :rotfl:

You just helped ME decide what I'm NOT doing in August!!!!!

Arlene

[Dreamer04]

LOL This is the funniest thing I've read in a while! I could easily see myself in your place. LOL

[SchultzFamily]

Regina, You described my experience exactly! Oh no add my 14yo DS on the back saying "Mom, You're going too slow! Mom, You're loosing everyone! Fasterrrrrr!" The whole time! He chose to ride back with Dad so I had my 10 yo DD on the back who I was sure was going to fly off any minute! I really needed a massage when I got off, every muscle in my body was so tense!
Vickie

[Regina]

Regina, You described my experience exactly! Oh no add my 14yo DS on the back saying "Mom, You're going too slow! Mom, You're loosing everyone! Fasterrrrrr!" The whole time! He chose to ride back with Dad so I had my 10 yo DD on the back who I was sure was going to fly off any minute! I really needed a massage when I got off, every muscle in my body was so tense!
Vickie

Thank you! See, it's not just me. At the sandbar I thought about getting on the back of DH's "personal watercraft" and giving my single to someone riding double. I decided against it. I figured that after 5 minutes of screaming in DH's ear, he'd help me to test my swimming skills. :fish:

From now on, my excitement level will be confined to raising my hand and asking for a Konk Kooler. :drinking1

[wannabecruiser]

THANK YOU FOR THE GREAT INSIGHT INTO YOUR TRIP!!!! :rotfl2:
I WILL BE GOING ON A CRUISE NEXT MAY AND I SENT YOUR REPORT TO MY SIL AND SAID I THINK THIS IS WHAT WE SHOULD TRY!!!! WHAT A GREAT WAY TO START MY DAY WITH LAUGHTER!!! I CAN ALMOST PICTURE SIL AND ME DOING THE EXCACT THINGS YOU DESCRIBE. TRYING TO GET ON THE "PERSONAL WATERCRAFT" I CAN SEE ME TRYING TO HOP ON THAT THING AND THEN FALLING RIGHT OFF!!!! OH WELL I AM SO GLAD I READ THESE TRIP REPORTS TODAY. THANKS AGAIN!!!

[tigger53]

oh no, this isn't good news. i just booked this tour the other day for our july 10th sailing. my 20 yr old son didn't want to go on it cause he thought it wasn't my cup of tea. i said i'd go without him so he relented to go with me on our own "personal watercraft" cause he didn't want to ride with me when i insisted i wanted a turn to drive too. i think byron will be my new best bud also cause i'm sure as heck not going to be going fast. i thought this was a nice leisurly tour with informative information and sightseeing kind of thing. i know i'll never hear the end of this when its over. :blush:

[MAGICinMYHEART]

I also have the Eco Tour scheduled for our cruise next month booked two PWC so I could go fast. Thanks for the boarding information I'm sure I'll be using The professional lift the knee and crawl on method. (with no photo instructions until seated on PWC)

:rotfl2:

Thanks for the laughter.
Beckie

[RaySharpton]

Hi, Regina. :) Thank you for the link from the other question about the eco tour.

You need to write more trip reports. I loved reading your experience.

I wonder if I could make it up on that jetski, too, with one good knee?

I may try.

I know that I will try the parasailing.

Thank you again, a wonderful read.

Sincerely, Ray. :)

[msr709]

I know this is an old report but its the funniest thing I've read in a long time. I can certainly see myself in your position. I'm going on a cruise next Oct 2006 and I was going to try this excursion but I'll have to give it some more thought. HILARIOUS account. I'm at work and they all think I've lost it, my sides hurt from so much laughing. Thank you very much for the amusement. :rotfl2: :banana: :rotfl2: :rotfl: :rotfl2: :rotfl:

[UGAFan0829]

That was pretty darn funny! Bless you heart, I know exactly how scared you were. The DH and I will not being doing that excursion. We had our taste of jet skis after we rented one in PC Beach two summers ago. I lost my hat, and when we went to stop and get it he told me to lean...didn't say which way, so I went the same way as him...Needless to say we ended up flipping the thing over...It is VERY hard to get back on a jet ski way out in the middle of the ocean. While I was flinging my legs trying not to freak out, all I could think about was the scene in Jaws when it shows the people's legs moving in the water and Jaws was swimming towards them. I swore after that that I would never get back on a jet ski in the ocean ever again! :earseek: :scared1: :faint: :eek:

[Skuba2]

Poor Byron---he is going to be the best known CM on the cruises now!!! LOL!!

I was waiting for the pic to pop up as I scrolled down the story---or more appropriately your rear end!

Thank you very much for the image. LMAO

DG

[pppiglet]

Anyone else have any thoughts on this tour? Sounds like fun, but then....I don't know.....

[jiminyC_fan]

You sound like me. Everyone is trying to talk me into it but gosh can I do it????????

[mom x4,grandma x4]

I say this is vacation!! Try something new, be adventurous!! :thumbsup2
The experience will be priceless even if you dont care for it.
Think of the great report you can write for the rest of us to read!!!! :rotfl2:
someday we will all be too old to try this or not on this earth anymore, dont be the one who says I wish I would have .... Be the one who can say, once I did .....

You'll be glad you did.

mom x4,grandma x4

[Bethipooh4]

OMG this is one of the funniest posts I have read.... :lmao:

All I can picture is myself getting on the jetski the same way you did, with my DH and DS snapping away with the cameras. :rotfl2: Not a pretty image.

I told them not to even think about this excursion...that and the image of jaws coming up and grabbing me, jetski and all....

[pppiglet]

Well, I went ATV riding for the first time at 45 in February and did alright. I am more worried about falling off into the water on this one and losing my contact lens! I guess that would make a good story though. :rotfl:

[Us2]

Ahhhhhhh another soul that felt the way I did and we had rough seas the day I did it with husband being the driver. I actually got on that sandbar with legs shaking and tried whistling for the WOnder to come pick me up. :cool1: It didn't work. I was so scared getting back on that thing and husband was making fun of me the whole time. At least we faced it, we did it and we accomplished something WE NEVER HAVE TO DO AGAIN! :banana: :woohoo: :banana: Husband did it again last week and he was the only one so they took him around the entire island!!! Good for him. Glad he enjoyed himself. Wonderful trip he said. I should of done it. No thanks, I enjoyed myself on the beach doing absolutely nothing!! Very happy you survived WebmasterRegina. I wasn't afraid of falling in the water as much as I was afraid of falling in the water and becoming an appetizer for something.

[WDWLVR]

Had to give this one a bump as we did it on May 28th. Reg my experience was just like yours except I didn't lose a visor. :rotfl2: I'm sure I was a sight getting on but I told everyone I went first so they wouldn't be embarassed and no one would be worse then me. On our first leg I was right behind the leader but kept getting a little too scared and would back off the throttle which meant everyone backed up behind me. So after our first stop they let everyone else go first and I brought up the rear. I was much happier there. We still went fast but at least I didn't feel like I was holding anyone up. Loved being out on the sand bar even it is fish poop. :lmao: I actually enjoyed it on the way back but again made a fool of myself getting off.


I'm totally glad I did it but I'm also glad that the only one on the excursion who knew me was Mark.

[Joan BWV98]

Great story. I can imagine myself trying to get on one of those things and being worried that someone would have a camera.

I read your story to my whole family, we are laughing with you, not at you. :rotfl2:

[MrsScooby]

Has anyone lost a passenger on this ? I'm a little nervous driving, but more worried about my DD9 who will be holding on. She is very much the tomboy and wants to do this because her brother (12) will be riding with her Dad. I'm only doing it to please her :guilty: .

BTW great trip report :thumbsup2

[BibbidyBobbidyBoo]

I got to the end of the 2nd page before I realized this was an old thread bumped up!
But ohwell- still deserves some credit- this excursion report was hilarious!!! (and informative)

If we ever do this excursion- I'm definitely doing it with DH driving and me holding on for dear life. If I fall off -hopefully I won't become something's appetizer (haha) but atleast I can blame DH for it. LOL

[lbgraves]

I'm so glad that this was bumped because I missed it last year. Regina, you ROCK with trip reports! :lmao: I think that we will stick with the stingrays in December. ;)