Cam's New Lease on Life Journal (comments welcome!)

[keenercam]

Well, some of you may already know me -- I am 41, with a great DH and DD16 and DS11. I work about 11 hours a day and take home work many nights and weekends. If I could, I'd spend every moment of my life with my husband and kids and working with Special Olympics. Unfortunately, I do have to work for a living (and to support my WDW/DVC habit!)

In February 1995 I was diagnosed with a rare, potentially fatal heart condition which should have been curable, but which 3 surgeries could not resolve. As of 1/2003, I could no longer even go through the motions of working out (treadmill) and often headed to bed by 7:30 or 8:30 at night, totally wiped out.


So, on 1/6/05 my life changed dramatically, and hopefully forever, when a nationally renowned doctor spent nearly 8 hours working on my heart and CURED me! (He had done the 3rd attempted surgery, but had to give up after 7 1/4 hours) I literally feel better than I have in 10 years and have so much energy and motivation. So, I figured now, while the fire is burning hot, I should get myself in gear, get motivated, and get FIT!

I have formed so many bad habits over the past several years -- decaf coffee every morning with cream and often a breakfast sandwich or bagel w/cream cheese (I am a carb freak) and NO exercise. My other really terrible habit was eating late at night -- sometimes as a result of leaving work so late and other times because of meetings, etc. And late at night, I would "graze" in the cabinets, eating snacks like chips, nuts, pretzels, popcorn, etc. UGH!

So, now I have a plan! My plan is to pack breakfast and lunch everyday, and if I am not going to be home before 8, to eat a premade dinner at work before leaving the office. I am also going to get back to drinking a lot of water. Finally, I have committed to walking the 2006 1/2 marathon!! I can't even believe it!

I have been completely motivated the last several days, have been eating healthy and not late at night. I went shopping and bought all sorts of nutritious and desirable foods and have been packing lunches and dinners.

So, thank you for your support as I start this journey.

My plan for today is:

B -- coffee w/skim milk; second cup with low carb flavored coffee mate (1 WW pt); whole wheat tortilla (2) w/ healthy choice ham (1); 1 cup grapes (1)

L -- turkey burger cut up with mushrooms, onions & broccoli (3 ww pts)

D -- large salad with sliced Healthy choice lunch meats and light dressing (4)

Snacks -- lite yogurt w/pretzels (3); string cheese (2); tangerine (.5)

I still have plenty of points to play with, and may need a more substantial dinner, especially if I go to the gym.

Exercise has always been UGH!!! to me, but my exercise plan seems very doable to me right now, especially since I put together a 2 HOUR workout music playlist on my Ipod -- I am hoping that eventually, I will play through the whole thing less than 2 times while walking 13.1 miles!!!!

What do you think?

Oh, yeah, one last thing, I bought lots of sugar free mints & gum, and will use those during the day to curb my oral fixation!

Thanks, guys! :grouphug:

[plutosmyfav]

Hi Cam,
Welcome!!!! Your story is amazing. I'm so glad you have regained your strength and feel good again. Your plan sounds like a good one. Here's pixie dust to send you one your way :wizard: :wizard: :wizard:

Sundie

[pettyone]

CAM--

I'll be pulling for you!! Lots of luck on this not-so-easy journey!!

:cheer2:

[keenercam]

Thank you so much Plutosmyfav and pettyone!

Geez, Sundy! How awesome that you lost 65 pounds! You must feel amazing.

I am really looking forward to getting to know everyone on the WISH board and hearing how everyone is doing.

Have a great day! And keep up the wonderful work! :cheer2:

[Lizzydoll73]

:wave: Hi Cam - Welcome to WISH. Glad to hear you are cured. Best of luck.

[MelanieC]

Hi Cam,

Your story is definately amazing. I remember reading it yesterday in another post. I'm so glad you found WISH!! and I'm so glad you've been cured.

I can't wait to keep up with how your doing. Your going to do terrific!

[keenercam]

Thanks for the welcome, Lizzie!

Melanie -- I am convinced that being here with all of you is going to keep me on track this year. There are so many nice people and everyone has been so kind and generous with their supportive words and their advice. I have lots of the first to offer and very little of the second. Worst of all, I have so little time on line that I don't get to post much to respond to all the threads I want to.

Recap of 1/20 and plan for 1/21

Was pretty good last night -- did 1.6 miles on the TM in 35 minutes with the help of great upbeat music. Drank another 16 oz of water while doing that. Then ate a snack (turkey sausage that I had pre-cooked for tonight's dinner; ff pringles crumbs -- wonder which of my kids left the empty can in the cupboard!? handful of popcorn) and went upstairs to avoid the fridge! Stayed within my WW points and didn't use the activity points I earned!

Plan for today:
B -- whole wheat tortilla w/healthy choice turkey; grapes
L -- turkey burger w/mushrooms, onions, broccoli (no bread)
D- turkey sausage and onions; green beans
Snacks -- lite yogurt w/pretzels; string cheese; apple; banana

Have a point cushion, and am going into my most challenging couple of days of the weekend. Will try to eat light whenever I have a choice, so that when we are socializing, I will have more flexibility.

[MaryPSU]

Hi Cam! Just read your post and wanted to shout out "good for you"!! Sounds like you're doing amazingly well. Congrats.

Let me know if you want any easy and flexible recipe tips ... I've been trying to eat really healthy since the holidays (with a couple of vacations coming up soon!!). My focus has been low fat/low carbs/small portions - plus exercise when I can. Just got off the exercise bike and am settling in to watch the EAGLES!! :cheer2:

Today I made some really good "grab and go" breakfast cups - sorta like a quiche but with no crust - with broccoli, mushrooms, pepper, onion, and tomato, plus egg substitute and low fat cheese. They're delicious and so easy to make ahead of time and grab on my way to the office.

I've also been trying out some low/no fat, low/no sugar chocolate puddings and moussses ... I just have to have a chocolate fix late in the day and am trying to stay away from ice cream and cookies!!! I can let you know what I've found out.

Hope all is well with your family ... we still look at the cruise photos and think of you all!!

Mary

[sarahsmom73]

Welcome! Glad you are here! :wave:

[keenercam]

Thanks, everyone!

Well, I have made it through most of the weekend with no cheating and even walked 2 miles today on my treadmill. I wasn't fast, but am getting back into the swing of things.

MaryPSU -- I would LOVE some recipes. The breakfast cups sound amazing and I think I even have ALL the ingredients. If you'd like to share your recipes, I'd be thrilled, and will be glad to share mine, too. I made turkey chili this weekend to have easy to grab hot lunches to take to work. My email is keenercam@aol.com

GO EAGLES!! GO STEELERS!! UH-OH, my house is going to be chaotic come superbowl sunday if it is an all PA game!

Have a great night everyone. No more computer for me tonight, but will check in tomorrow.

[kayeandjim00]

Hi Cam! Just wanted to say welcome to the WISH Journals. :wave2: Your story is amazing and I'm so happy for you. ::yes:: I'm looking forward to following your journey.

[Princess Michelle]

Hi Cam! Welcome to WISH! You have an amazing story! I'm sorry that you had to endure such heart problems but thank God that you are completely cured, that is so awesome! ::yes::

You are doing so well already, I hope you have a wonderful week! :sunny:

[keenercam]

Hi, everyone!
Are you all staying warm? I should have helped shovel snow this weekend or walked the dog, but I wimped out and stuck to the treadmill, instead! I did cook volumes of veggie chili and turkey chili and turkey sausage and broccoli, so I have all sorts of very desirable food already portioned in the fridge for the next several days.

Mary -- I cannot wait to try your breakfast cups. Thank you so much for the recipe -- I cannot wait to make them!!!

Kaye & Michelle -- Thank you so much for the warm welcomes! Everyone here on the WISH board is sooo nice. So, does either of you have a favorite recipe to share?

One of my favorite "fillers" is to reduce chunky salsa in a saucepan, take the veggies out of the pan, spray it with cooking spray, add egg beater, then put the reduced salsa back in the pan, cook until solid, sprinkle with fat free cheddar, and pour over lite english muffins -- on WW this is about 2.5 points (as long as you use the light english muffins that are 1 pt each). YUMMY.

I am also adding steamed broccoli or canned cut green beans to practically every entree to extend it without adding points.

Have a great day everyone!

[keenercam]

Well, it has been 8 days. I can't believe I have been this disciplined for 8 days. I know that doesn't sound like much to many people, but for me it is a big deal. Everything in my life is so structured that I tend to rebel with food and exercise -- eating whatever I want and doing something other than exercising. I have really attempted to change my mindset to a way of thinking that the disciplined eating and the exercise are for me, and not punishment or deprivation.
2 months from tomorrow we will be at my "happy place" (WDW) -- I am hoping the pictures from this trip will be very very much less embarassing than my pix from last April. I know we aren't supposed to lose for a particular event, that this is supposed to be a way of life, but having that trip to look forward to is definitely motivating me.
So, I have many tools in place --
I have the best support system here,
I am using the weightwatchers website e-tools (meetings were just another time commitment I couldn't make and I've committed to using that time to treadmill instead)
Loaded my ipod with great workout music that is very upbeat to keep me walking fast
Ordered marathoning for mortals and the absolute beginner's guide in the hopes of learning something about how to do this -- am hoping DH will also find them interesting and helpful.
I have an exercise chart at work and at home to keep track
I made a pull off calendar with every page being a countdown to the marathon with a different Disney character on it and all typed in Disney font
I made a "walking my way to disney world" walking chart, to keep track of how many miles total I do. I'd love to do 10 miles a week -- will have to see if I can keep to that
I have been stocking up on healthy food, not touching the other stuff
Gathering great recipes (thanks to MaryPSU and others who have posted or emailed delicious sounding recipes -- can't wait to cook)
Keeping a journal in my purse of what I eat and when, to have a better understanding of my habits and thus, better able to modify or eliminate them.

I do feel energized and enthusiastic about this -- can't remember the last time I felt this way. Hope I am saying the same thing a month from now. I will take it a month at a time.

If you are still here, thanks for listening and thanks for your support!

[keenercam]

walked 2 miles in less than 40 minutes on Tuesday night! Can't figure out whether to continue doing 2 miles and pushing to get it done in less time, or to continue doing 40 minutes and try to get in more miles. Will have to give that some thought. My marathoning books should be arriving today. Will be interesting to get some perspective on what this journey is that I have started.

Here's hoping today is even better than yesterday.

[keenercam]

My son said something very interesting to my daughter last night. He said, "you are always thinking about where we have been and how great it was, instead of looking forward to the next thing and anticipating it and enjoying the anticipation." WOW!!! What an amazing statement from an 11 year old. I have really been thinking about that alot. I HAVE to stop thinking about where I was and where I could have been now, and instead have to look forward, have an objective and enjoy the journey.
So, I do think there are lessons to be learned from yesterday. I am proud of myself because yesterday, I stuck to WW all day. We went out to the Olive Garden last night -- I ate salad with dressing on the side and added less than 2 Tbsp to 2 plates full. I ordered the mussels for my entree and split them in half with my husband, and gave him the entire bowl of them so I wasn't tempted by the broth. I also ordered bruschetta and counted the bread and olive oil and shared it. I only drank diet soda, no mixed drink or wine. I stayed within my points. The only thing I will do differently next time is either take half of the bruschetta bread and send the rest to the other end of the table or away, or order minestrone soup instead of bruschetta. My biggest weakness dessert-wise in the world is Olive Garden's tiramisu -- I am most proud of myself because I didn't get it, even though everyone at the table urged me to and even said to get it for takeout.

So, here it is Thursday, January 27, and I have now been "cheat-free" for 10 days (reminder to self -- fix signature). Impressive to me because I know myself, even if not to anyone else. Want to go to the movies tomorrow night with Howard. Have to save my flex points and get only a small popcorn for myself with no butter. He can have whatever he wants. Think I will also cut up two pria bars and put them in a baggie for my sweet treat during the movie. Nice to have a plan ahead of time.

Gotta keep :cheer2: myself on. Our trip to WDW is now less than 2 months away. I am hell bent and determined that I WILL have lost a considerable amount of weight AND INCHES (hey, all that TM walking has to count for something, right?) before we go.

The funny thing is, I know I could lose so much more so much faster if I was willing to sacrifice and eat salads all the time and a lot less normal foods, but I am just not willing to make those sacrifices, because I don't think that is real life -- I know I wouldn't be able to stick with it and I would become resentful and rebellious after just a short time. So, I am doing this my way, actually the WW flex points way, and I am okay with the progress and the speed of progress.

[lizdotcom99]

Cam..... :banana: :banana: Yeah for you!! :banana: :banana:

What an insighful son you have. Isn't it amazing what kids think and say?

Sounds like you had a great day yesteday. I would not have made it OP at Olive Garden. Love the tiramisu too!! Way to go!! You rock!!

So here is to looking forward and anticipating all that life holds for your future.

Can't wait to hear of many more of your successes!!

:banana: :cool1: :cool1: :banana:

[keenercam]

Thank you so much, Liz! You brought tears to my eyes. The secretaries here all just went out to mexican for lunch. I am going to eat my weight watchers turkey chili, a fat free brownie, and an apple. It is the encouragement I get here and the accountability I feel both to myself and to the people here who take the time and energy to encourage me, that keeps me on track.

You are a doll. I hope you have a fabulous day! :cutie:

[lizdotcom99]

You are a doll. I hope you have a fabulous day! :cutie:

Thanks!! And by golly, I am having a GREAT day!!! Funny how this all works out.....ya see, I was thinking about getting motivated by reading some journals. Yours being the last I read, I got up and said, "Hey why not try the 3 mile WATP.....it is a long shot...but I gotta try" and guess what? I MADE IT TROUGH THE WHOLE THING!!! So thanks to you and your encouragement I did it.

Now kudows to you again, cause I don't think I could have stayed at work for lunch knowing the girls were going out for Mexican food. The chips have a way of attaching themselves to me and before you know it, I have eaten the whole basket...or maybe two!!! But hey, the salsa is good for you...right?

And with that you get the :banana: :banana: :dancer: :dancer: :thewave: cause you :rockband:


:cool1: :cool1: :cool1:

[keenercam]

Hey, Liz!!
WOW!!!! You did the 3 mile WATP on a whim? How remarkable!!!! :worship: You must feel sooooo proud of yourself! :cool1: I am promising myself I will walk on the treadmill tonight, and my quest is to do 3 miles. :bitelip: I just don't know if I can walk for an hour at a good pace. I will do the best I can and if I make it, you and I can celebrate together tomorrow! We can :cheer2: and :grouphug: and just be thrilled that we each did 3 miles today!

BTW, I made a "Walking My Way to Disney World" Chart with rows of 10 blocks, to mark one off for each mile I walk between now and the 1/2 marathon. :earboy2: Looking forward to seeing those blocks get marked off really quick and to having a bunch of those pages with the miles checked off. Would love to have 100 miles done by mid-March. I already have 5.6 done :teeth: Knowing I will see ::MickeyMo at the end of March should help to motivate me to keep up the pace and momentum. What is inspring you?

I'm a little jealous of everyone who works out early in the day. I feel as if I have little time and even less motivation, and I feel less than thrilled knowing I have to go home from a long day of work and work out, but I know it is good for me. I should really try to start working out in the morning. I have to compel myself to go down to the TM when the alarm goes off at 6 and walk for 40 minutes. If I did that every weekday, I'd have at least 10 miles in a week, solid. Then, I could do WATP or something at night plus other kinds of workouts, including arm and leg stuff.

Okay, new objective. Walk tonight and then starting tomorrow, get up when the alarm goes off, and walk on the TM while I watch the morning news. Think I can do it?

Have a great night everyone!

[Princess Michelle]

Cam, you are doing excellent! I have to say, your son is very wise! ::yes:: If we all could have his attitude we would probably feel a lot better!

I think it's a great idea to start working out before you go to work. It's hard for sure but if you are up that early anyway and usually just sit to watch the news then why not hop on that treadmill. I think you will actually find that you feel energized when you're done and relieved that it's over and done with and not waiting for you at the end of a long day. Good luck to you! :)

[keenercam]

Thank you, Michelle, for the support and wonderful advice!

Well, I did it -- walked 3 miles tonight on the TM in 58:40. Was watching Extreme Makeover for part of it. Was thinking -- "I'm making myself over. I have my friends on the WISH board, and I have a goal. I can do this."

So, the first part of the challenge I gave myself has been met. And I stayed well within my WW points today. After walking, I had dessert - a No Pudge ice cream cone. NOT rewarding myself with food. Just didn't want to eat dessert before working out, and it was wonderfully refreshing after working out.

Hope everyone else is having a great day, too! :cool1: :banana: ::MickeyMo :teeth: :cloud9: :cheer2:

[keenercam]

Did it! Started my day off with (a little bit of) exercise!!! Did WATP 1 mile -- did only the walking 1 mile part, and I couldn't find my weight balls, but I did the walking. I got out of the bed on this freezing cold morning, 1/2 hour early, and did it. What a great feeling, knowing I started the day off that way. Being accountable here is what motivated me. I wanted to know that I could set a goal and do it. And I wanted everyone who has been so supportive to know that their kind words help and motivate me. My mile times are improving on the treadmill, and I am building up stamina to do longer distances.
Here is what my journal looks like:
1/20 -- 1.6 miles -- 35 minutes -- 21.88 minutes/mile
1/23 -- 2.0 miles -- 40mins 30 secs -- 20.25 minutes/mile
1/25 -- 2.0 miles -- 39 mins 40 secs -- 19.84 minutes/mile
1/27 -- 3.0 miles -- 58 mins 30 secs -- 19.56 minutes/mile

Now that I have done 3 miles, I am going to be sure I do at least that much each time I step on the TM. Putting an hour aside JUST for the TM is not easy, but I am going to try to keep it up. Hopefully, I can get that time down to considerably less than an hour, so that I can walk some 5Ks over the next several months without being the last one on the course.

My objective for today is not to eat too much at an awards luncheon I am going to. I actually packed my lunch (because that is a commitment I have made), and if at all possible, will merely "pick" at the luncheon or, best scenario, stick to salad, and then come back here and eat my lunch.

[pettyone]

Well, it has been 8 days. I can't believe I have been this disciplined for 8 days. I know that doesn't sound like much to many people, but for me it is a big deal. Everything in my life is so structured that I tend to rebel with food and exercise -- eating whatever I want and doing something other than exercising. I have really attempted to change my mindset to a way of thinking that the disciplined eating and the exercise are for me, and not punishment or deprivation.

I do feel energized and enthusiastic about this -- can't remember the last time I felt this way. Hope I am saying the same thing a month from now. I will take it a month at a time.

If you are still here, thanks for listening and thanks for your support!

You ARE fired up!!! I think that you've given your journey a lot of thought, done alot of planning, & are totally committed to meeting your goals!!! You know, you've "flipped the switch", so to speak...YOU WILL DO WELL!!!

Keep it up!! I'll check in from time-to-time to see how you're doing!

:wizard:

[keenercam]

Tracey--
Thank you so much for the kind words and encouragement! I am finding that planning is my friend on this journey -- planning meals, planning exercise time, and planning a goal and the path to it. Of course, having the nicest :cheer2: :cheer2: :cheer2: in the world right here is the biggest help of all! :teeth:


I just got back from an awards luncheon, where my firm was honored. The food was so wonderful and for the first time in my memory, I was not tempted by the desserts or any of the carb type dishes. I ate grilled shrimp, a delicious salad with vinegarette dressing and a fabulous asparagus,red pepper & vinegarette dressing mix. How considerate of the host firm to have made such great choices available to the attendees. It's so nice when the choices are easy. Now, I can save my turkey chili for dinner, and still be well within points. I think lunch may have been 4 points total! Way cool!!!

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

You are doing a great job! Planning is definatley your friend on this weight loss journey. I have to agree that your son is very insightful. You have done a great job the last few days managing temptation. Turning down tiramisu, mexican, and desserts at the luncheon. You will definatley make it to goal with that determination.
Have a good weekend,
Beth

[keenercam]

Went to the gym today, at DH's urging. Can't believe I took my huge self out in public and walked on a treadmill with all those people around. Oh, well, have to accept that this is what I look like, and at least I am working on improving.
So, in terms of treadmilling, my times seem to be steadily improving. Can't wait until I can do 3 miles in 45 minutes. Hopefully in time for the 5k I intend to walk in about a month.
My treadmill log so far:
1/20 -- 1.6 miles -- 35 minutes -- 21.88 minutes/mile
1/23 -- 2.0 miles -- 40mins 30 secs -- 20.25 minutes/mile
1/25 -- 2.0 miles -- 39 mins 40 secs -- 19.84 minutes/mile
1/27 -- 3.0 miles -- 58 mins 30 secs -- 19.56 minutes/mile
1/29 -- 3.0 miles -- 54 mins 50 secs --18.28 minutes/mile
YES!!!

[lizdotcom99]

Went to the gym today, at DH's urging. Can't believe I took my huge self out in public and walked on a treadmill with all those people around. Oh, well, have to accept that this is what I look like, and at least I am working on improving.



Cam, good for you!! You made me laugh!! On the days that I walk outside I feel sooooo bad for all those that have to see me in my walking gear.......spandex in the size I wear is for 1) hard to find, 2) not meant to be worn in public by someone of my size, 3) looks like it should be worn by a toddler before I get my BIG self into it!!

But I am thinking at some point, even my spandez will be too big for me...so I continue toscare the neighbors...and some even smile and wave....not sure what they are thinking... :rotfl2: but I just can't care about that either!!

Keep up the great work!! It is hard, but SOOOOO worth it!!! You are doing great!!

:cool1: :cool1: :cool1:

[sarahsmom73]

:cheer2: Go Cam! :cheer2: Go Cam! :cheer2: You can do this! :cheer2:

[keenercam]

Thank you so much, Sarahsmom. I really do feel as if I have a cheering section here, and I appreciate it so much that you took the time to post. I saw that you have been sick. I hope you are feeling better. BTW, I can't even imagine being as close to goal as you are. Congratulations and keep up the great work!!!

Thanks, Liz!!!! You had me :rotfl2: !!! Spandex is NOWHERE in my future! Someday, maybe I will be less self conscious about shorts. Actually, I LOVE using my treadmill at home, simply because I don't have to worry about how I am dressed, piling my hair on my head in a funky ponytail. I can also pull off my tee shirt when I get icky and just workout in a sports bra -- could never do that at the Y! And the best thing of all is that I have trained my entire family to leave me alone when I am exercising -- no questions or requests or phone calls. So, the time really seems like it is "me" time.

Wanna hear something funny? At the Y there are about 10 tv monitors all playing different things and the TM I was on happened to be near the tv with extreme plastic surgery playing on it. Let me tell you, if watching liposuction or a tummy tuck isn't enough to persuade you to eat healthy, nothing is! I was, however, thinking "My way is so much smarter and healthier, even if it takes me so much longer to lose those inches."

So, TM last night was 53 mins. 57 secs, which is less than 18 minutes per mile. The time is definitely dropping, slowly, but surely. I even ran last night for two 30-45 second spurts. Almost laughable, but made me feel like I was trying something different and a little harder.

[sarahsmom73]

Cam! You are doing an amazing job! It is really nice to have the tredmill at home, isn't it!!! :cheer2: Keep it up!

[pettyone]

So, TM last night was 53 mins. 57 secs, which is less than 18 minutes per mile. The time is definitely dropping, slowly, but surely. I even ran last night for two 30-45 second spurts. Almost laughable, but made me feel like I was trying something different and a little harder.

That's not laughable, IT'S TOUGH TO DO! I tried to run last week on the TM and "the girls" were bouncing too much...really need a sports bra...LOL.

Good job...alot of people can't run for 10 seconds!

[keenercam]

Having a bit of a "down" day, just because of the scale, and I have to get over that. Yesterday, it looked like the number was significantly lower -- so much so that I checked it several times. Today, it was 3 lbs more than it was yesterday morning. I know it can be due to any number of things, including the fact that I ate very very late last night. So, I just have to get past the fact that today's number is higher than yesterday's. I think I am going to have to start weighing myself at the "Y" once in a while, too, to get a real idea of the number. Our scale is so unreliable depending on where it is on the very flat floor, where you put your feet, etc.

Okay, I did lots of things yesterday that I wish I hadn't, but none of it was that bad and I still stuck to my commitment. When DH and I went to the movies last night I got only a small unbuttered popcorn and drank bottled water. I had 4 of his pretzel bites dipped in cheese, but was still within my WW points. I then went home, did 2 miles on the TM, and ate dinner at 10:15 -- UGH!!! But I was hungry and I figured that if ate before I worked out, I wouldn't feel like getting on the TM. Won't be doing that again, of course. So, I drank all my water, didn't splurge at the movies, got on the TM even though I was hungry and tired, and stayed within my points. The things I won't do again are sharing DH's junk food and eating dinner so very late at night.

[keenercam]

Tracey --
Your post was a real "up moment" for me this morning!
Thank you.

You had me :rotfl2: too about "the girls" -- I have 2 sports bras, 2 large tee shirts and one pair of sweatpants and all pieces are dirty right now from working out Sat, Sun, and Monday, so DH is going home at lunch to do laundry for me so I can go to the Y tonight. I am going to order a couple more things on line right now, so that I have plenty to go a few days without having to do laundry.

Have a great day! :sunny:

[pettyone]

Our scale is so unreliable depending on where it is on the very flat floor, where you put your feet, etc.

Okay, I did lots of things yesterday that I wish I hadn't, but none of it was that bad and I still stuck to my commitment.


BINGO AND BINGO.

Please don't beat yourself up too badly...if you stuck to your commitment, you may have done a few things that others may have done differently, but the bottom line is that "stuck to" is "stuck to"...at least where I come from. ;)

[keenercam]

Thanks, Tracy -- that is a big help. I am definitely staying within my points and have barely touched my earned activity points, and have not touched a single FLEX point. So, even though logic says I should definitely see pounds dropping and I haven't, I know intellectually that it will eventually happen. Guess my metabolism is still sleeping or something.
Just did the math -- I walked 17.6 miles in January -- not bad considering the first day I exercised was January 20. So, in 11 days, I did 17.6 miles. Which means I should be able to do 40 in February (it's a short month). Will start with, hopefully, 3 miles at the Y tonight.

[Strings]

Hey Cam,

You are doing a great job. You are exercising and staying within your points. You did awesome at the movies. You will definately see the scale move downward soon. Keep up the great work.

Take care,
Beth

[sarahsmom73]

Besides in the words of DD 3 1/2 when she thinks something is dumb... That scale is a "DUMACRAT!!!"

[lizdotcom99]

Hey Cam...

methinks you need to hide your scale......

I had to do that as well. I had Greg take it and hide it!! :rolleyes1 Last week I couldn't lose a pound to save my soul, in fact, I gained one...but then this week WHOOSH!! You time with the WHOOSH fairy is due!!

Great job on all that treadmill time! Keep up with it. It has to pay off!!

Can't wait to hear of your continued success!!

:cool1: :cool1: :cool1:

[DoeWDW]

:wave2: Hi Cam!! I just read through your journal and you AMAZE me! :worship: Girlfriend, you aren't just TALKING about getting healthy -you are DOING it!

Your dedication to exercise is something I aspire to! Your long days at work would make it so easy to skip the workouts, but you are making exercise a priority and look at those times decreasing! By the way, I'm just starting to run a bit on the treadmill. I walked the Disney half marathon in January but didn't do any running. I'm lucky if I can run a minute at a time! So keep on running. I find that it uses slightly different muscles than walking and it feels good to alternate the walking and jogging.

Your willpower with your food has been great! You are sticking like glue to your healthy foods and that is making a difference! Bravo for eating healthy, even when it isn't easy.

Now about that silly scale! :badpc: (insert scale instead of PC). Because you are exercising, I'm guessing that you will lose inches off your body before you lose pounds. Please don't let this discourage you! Pay attention to how your clothes are fitting and let that motivate you to keep going when the scale isn't cooperating. If you have a tape measure, you can take your measurements once every week or two and watch those inches melt away! :cloud9:

Keep up the great work, Cam! You're on the right track! :sunny:

[geetey]

Hi Cam!
I wanted to stop by and see how you are doing. I just read your journal, and as a fellow WWer, may I make a suggestion? You should start eating those AP points if you aren't touching your Flex points. You probably aren't eating enough and that's why the scale isn't moving. I know it doesn't make logical sense, but with your great exercise routine, you are falling below the minimum points you should have each day. Like I said, it doesn't make logical sense, but I had fallen into the same trap and another WISH WWer pointed it out to me and they were right! Good luck! You are doing great! :)

[keenercam]

Hi, everyone! I am feeling so much better today about everything. I agree that I have to stop allowing the scale to impact my mood. Of course knowing I walked 3 miles again last night and had enough points for 2 taco bell tacos for dinner surely improved my mood!
Liz -- Unfortunately, Howard is as bad as I am, stepping on the scale every morning, stepping off, stepping back on . . . We are a pair. The difference is he has so little to lose!
Beth -- Thank you so much for your encouragement and positive reinforcement about the movies -- we go very often and it is important for me to figure out how I am going to handle that situation going forward. The popcorn was delicious, and I could have even eaten less of it and still have been satisfied. I brought a pria bar with me, but didn't eat that. I also brought a tootsie pop with me and was sucking on that after the popcorn was done. I think that was a sound strategy and will plan to do that in the future, too. There is something about the movies that requires food, UGH!!!

Sarahsmom -- that "DUMACRAT" remark is outrageously funny coming from a little one! You must crack up whenever she says that!

Doreen -- Wow! You are so sweet! I am so impressed that you walked the half. You must be so incredibly proud of yourself. And having just done that, it would be so easy for you to slack off and rest on that accomplishment and you aren't doing that. You must be so disciplined! Congratulations!!!

I wish I could say that I have that addiction to exercise that some people do, but alas, I don't. I am such an ugly exerciser that I have to force myself to be out there and am very uncomfortable about running in public on the TM at the Y. I am forcing myself to do it because I know that only by doing it will I become better at it. And seeing results in the way my clothes fit is such a motivator for me. Even though the pounds aren't droppping off, I know I will see my hips and thighs taking up less and less room in a seat or my clothes and that will keep me going. Putting on my pantsuit for court this week after not fitting in it for a year was HUGE for me (excuse the pun). I just have to record these moments and these memories so that I can find motivation here when my passion dissipates.

Terry -- Thank you so much for the advice about eating enough points. I hadn't really thought about the fact that my body may have gone into that starvation mode that you sometimes hear about. I think I will try to eat more points in the next week all in healthy foods and see if it makes a difference. I am glad to hear it worked for you. It's funny that even having a splurge last night was within points. Gosh, I really, really LOVE WW. Don't you?

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

I have said many times that I will take inches over pounds anytime. You are definately losing inches. Congrats on the suit fitting. That is a great motivator.. I really don't like exercising in public either, so I have to force myself at the Y sometimes too. You are definately not alone on that one.

Have a great day,
Beth

[keenercam]

Thanks, Beth. Howard got me to sign up for the latest exercise challenge at our Y last night, so I think that will help keep me on track. He is so loving and supportive that I love being with him there. He usually gets on a cross trainer near my treadmill and we can make eye contact pretty frequently. He looks at me so lovingly and always seems proud of me, rather than embarassed. It is remarkable, really, especially if you saw him. He is gorgeous and fit, and I'm, uhm, well, let's just say, I'm not.
Thank you so much for your support. I come here as frequently as I can and just soak up all the positive vibes. I can't believe I have been cheat free for 16 days and that I have walked 20.6 miles since January 20. I would never be this far along without the support and kindness and generosity of people here like you.
I hope you have a fabulous evening. :teeth:

[keenercam]

Stayed within points yesterday, including a couple of the activity points I earned doing 3 miles on the TM. The 5K is a month away and I'd like to know I could walk it in well under 1 hour, even if the actual time isn't that great since I'll be walking with 2 other people who may not want to walk that fast. Time was a bit slower last night at 55:50 and I was pretty bummed, but Howard, knowing I was disappointed, said, "Yeah, but is it easier?" I told him it is and he said "Well, that's good." I have to put the "That's good" in my head and be glad. What a guy.
Shouldn't have eaten pretzels as late as I did last night, but I did have the points. Really want to get back to not eating for 3 hours before bed. Geez, I may have to start staying up a heck of a lot later!

[keenercam]

My rings are LOOSE!!! OMG, they are turning on my fingers. Now I KNOW I am losing, even if it doesn't show up on the scale. Our Easter trip to WDW is only 51 days away, and I know I am well on my way to fitting in all my clothes for that trip or maybe even needing a new pair of shorts or two. Thank God.

[Strings]

Congratulation Cam,

isn't it great to have something concrete to show you are losing weight!?! You are doing a great job. Shopping for new shorts is always good incentive to keep going too!

Have a great evening,
Beth

[keenercam]

Hey, Beth!
Yes, it is wonderful, even if it is a pain in the neck when I am typing. I hope things are going well for you, too. I have to catch up on journals -- didn't get to them yesterday.

Well, I walked 3 miles on the TM last night in 56 mins -- definitely not getting faster yet -- getting to a 15 min pace seems so far off. I have incredibly short legs and I have to wonder whether I may actually have to jog in order to do a 15 minute mile. :sad2: I am not going to worry about it yet -- I have soooo far to go before I am at that issue. I am watching my "Walking My Way to Disney" chart filling up and am so proud that I have been able to sustain the enthusiasm and discipline this long. :Pinkbounc 18 days is such an achievement for me. :teeth: I am disappointed to know that it will be hard to squeeze in any time to exercise this weekend. Tonight we are driving about an hour away to pick up our Godchildren who will spend the night with us and then up at 6:30 tomorrow a.m. to take our daughter to rehearsal before a competition, at her competition all day, home by midnight tomorrow night, and Sunday is the Polar Bear Plunge for Special Olympics! :cold: Guess this is the last year I can bow out of actually going in the water because of my heart condition, since I no longer HAVE a heart condition! :) I am thinking that I will try to at least do a mile on the TM if I can get away for 20 minutes, even if it means getting up earlier than everyone else to try to squeeze it in. The thought of making no little "x" s on my chart for three days is unbearable. Then again, I COULD walk the entire time my family is watching the SuperBowl! Okay, so that is a plan. Sticking to WW points will be a challenge this weekend, too, since we will be home so little.
So, here is the plan
1. Eat dinner tonight before meeting our friends at Friendly's and then only get coffee and something very light there, like a salad. If we are meeting them for dessert, I will stick to coffee (and bring my own flavored creamer!)

2. Pack food for tomorrow in my tote bag, so that I have good food and snacks to eat at an event where they will probably have subs, hot dogs, etc.

3. I WON"T EAT at the after plunge party on Sunday -- the food there is outrageously dangerous for me -- pizza, chili, cheese & crackers, and chocolate chip cookies. I'd rather stop at a restaurant and get a huge salad and have to pay for it.

4. TREADMILL instead of sitting in front of the tv while we watch the Eagles TROUNCE the Pats.

5. WALK/TREADMILL/WATP a total of at least 5 miles this weekend.

So, that's the plan. Let's see how I do. Wish me luck! Tough, tough weekend!

[keenercam]

All right, I am off to start my challenging weekend! Keeping my fingers crossed. So glad I have all those flex points in case I need a few. Hoping not to use them. Here's hoping all my WISH buddies have a great weekend too.

[geetey]

Cam, you have a GREAT plan in place and I bet you are going to have a fantastic weekend!! Good for you being so motivated to get your exercise in!! That's a sign of success! I know you can do it!

I don't think there is any way any one could get me to do a cold water plunge! Brrr!! :cold: I would probably fake an injury each year just to avoid it. :rolleyes1

Have a WONDERFUL WEEKEND! :cheer2:

[sarahsmom73]

Awesome motivation! You are already a success! :cheer2:

[keenercam]

Sticking to WW points will be a challenge this weekend, too, since we will be home so little.
So, here is the plan
1. Eat dinner tonight before meeting our friends at Friendly's and then only get coffee and something very light there, like a salad. If we are meeting them for dessert, I will stick to coffee (and bring my own flavored creamer!)

2. Pack food for tomorrow in my tote bag, so that I have good food and snacks to eat at an event where they will probably have subs, hot dogs, etc.

3. I WON"T EAT at the after plunge party on Sunday -- the food there is outrageously dangerous for me -- pizza, chili, cheese & crackers, and chocolate chip cookies. I'd rather stop at a restaurant and get a huge salad and have to pay for it.

4. TREADMILL instead of sitting in front of the tv while we watch the Eagles TROUNCE the Pats.

5. WALK/TREADMILL/WATP a total of at least 5 miles this weekend.

So, that's the plan. Let's see how I do. Wish me luck! Tough, tough weekend!

Well, it's SUnday night and the worst of it is over and I am home, safe and sound where I can control my food availability. All in all, things went pretty well.
1. On Friday night, I ate at home before we ended up at Cracker Barrel with our friends for dessert. I had coffee there and 1 scoop of sugar free ice cream of which I took 4 bites -- my Goddaughter ate the rest! Thanks, Magpie! :flower:

2. For Saturday, I packed 2 lite string cheese, 2 pria bars, and a fat free tuna salad and crackers pack -- all I ate at the competition from the cafeteria was 1/2 soft pretzel. For lunch, we went to our friends' house -- everyone else ate pizza and sausage sandwiches. I ate a delicious salad from the pizza place with great garlic croutons. YUM!! When we got home at about midnight, I was still really hungry, so I had healthy choice ham on a whole wheat tortilla. Ended up with points to spare, even though my best friend got me some of those 3 color italian cookies I love -- ate 3 total and counted the points. Yeah!

3. We did not go to the after-plunge party. Stopped at applebee's instead where I had weight watchers onion soup and grilled chicken with peppers & onions. Delicious and all for 10 points plus the 2 I charged myself for tasting the nachos and a couple of fries.

4. Now the plan is to change into work out clothes and do WATP 1 mile to warm up and then 4-5 miles on the TM during the Eagles game.

5. If I walk for the first half I will probably meet this goal.

Here we go. Off to the basement. :banana:

[sarahsmom73]

Great Job Cam!!! :banana: :banana: :banana: You did awesome this weekend!

[keenercam]

Thanks, everyone!
Wow! It's Monday morning and I am starting my 4th week of my new healthy lifestyle. There is so much to be thankful for this morning. I thank God for giving me strength to get through this weekend in such a way that I am not beating myself up this morning. It used to be that every morning I was overwhelmed with regret about how I had eaten the day before and that another day had gone by with me living an unhealthy lifestyle.
This morning I am so grateful that I had the strength to stay on plan all weekend, and walk 5 miles last night -- 1 mile WATP and 4 miles TM. I cannot even believe I did that. Feels good. And I did NOT step on the scale this morning. Okay, okay, it is only one day, but I have to modify that behavior as well. I have to weigh in one morning a week, and not step on the scale the other days. It fluctuates too much from day to day, and I found I was letting what the scale said influence how I felt about myself. No more of that.
5 MILES!!! Gee, who would have thought? Here's hoping for a fabulous week, for me and for all my WISH friends.

[keenercam]

Feeling a bit discouraged today and I know I have to get over it. That damn scale is going to drive me nuts! I can't believe how little weight is dropping. How can that possibly be with all that I have been disciplined? I have exercised nearly every single day and have been watching every bite I put in my mouth and I am furious that I haven't lost a considerable number of pounds. I have scheduled an appointment with a personal trainer for next Wednesday night, to get an orientation to our Y fitness center. So far, I have only been using the treadmill there and at home. I have told myself it is a good way to transition to exercise and to get used to walking to train for the 1/2 marathon. I also thought it would help me to build up endurance. Of course, I thought the natural side benefit of all of that walking would be that I would see the pounds drop off in gobs! Instead, I have only lost a couple of lousy pounds. I have been doing WW since 1/17 and have been absolutely cheat free. And I have been treadmilling since 1/20 and have walked a total of 33.6 miles in less than 3 weeks! So, why the heck am I NOT losing weight. I mean, if I were to take those weight charts seriously, I have about 85 pounds to lose -- I KNOW my body will never cooperate with that, and I have set a much more reasonable goal of about 45-50 pounds with the hopes that I might get there and still have some motivation and discipline and enthusiasm left in me and keep going. But it is so darn discouraging to be working this hard and not see results on the scale. I know all the things that I would say to someone in my position, and I have to remind myself:
1. don't rely on the scale. think about how you feel and how your clothes fit
2. you're building muscle
3. you have to eat all your ww points and all the activity points
4. shake things up a bit -- eat different kinds of food
5. don't eat late at night
6. keep up the exercise
7. strive to be fit, not for a particular weight

Yeah, so I have reminded myself. Gotta get over it. Recognize the achievements
1. stayed OP yesterday, even though I got home at 8:45 pm and was so tempted to eat something quick and easy and not OP for dinner

2. walked 2 miles last night even though I had no energy, even less desire

3. Have been cheat free for 22 days; have been exercising since 1/20 (13 times in 18 days)

So, here we go -- my plan for today:
1. stay on plan and eat all my points
2. go to the Y tonight and do 3 miles on TM
3. go to the grocery store and pick up a few of my 0 point favorites -- cauliflower, cabbage, and canned green beans
4. make a chart reviewing how many points I have eaten each day and how much I have exercised and printing out my journals to review the points I have been eating, to see if there is something I should change about the types of food I am eating
5. plan a night when I can go out for chinese buffet, saving points throughout the day to do that and eating activity points or flex points if I want/need to-- when I go I will eat nothing battered or fried except one eggroll and will load up on vegetables. Something to look forward to.

[pettyone]

Yeah, so I have reminded myself. Gotta get over it. Recognize the achievements
1. stayed OP yesterday, even though I got home at 8:45 pm and was so tempted to eat something quick and easy and not OP for dinner

2. walked 2 miles last night even though I had no energy, even less desire

3. Have been cheat free for 22 days; have been exercising since 1/20 (13 times in 18 days)



I understand how frustrated you are...wish I could help!! I strongly believe that effort=payoff, it's just soooooo hard to wait to see results...but they're coming!!

YOU ARE DOING GREAT!! Keep plugging away!

:cheer2:

[keenercam]

Thanks, Tracy! If I didn't have SO MUCH to lose, I would understand that it takes longer. But I have such a long way to go that the simple math of eating less calories than you burn should have me dropping pounds like crazy. UGH! I will keep plugging along, thanks to the support of my fellow WISHers and the accountability I feel here.

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

You are doing an amazing job. You were so determined this weekend. I am so proud of you.

I just have a couple of suggestions for you.
MEASURE!!!! When the scale doesn't cooperate, you are probably be losing inches. Take weekly or monthly measurements. It can really help keep you motivated to see a concrete number of inches disappear.

Go to the Y orientation and start weight training. Have them orient you to the circuit. Muscle will help increase your resting metabolic rate. You'll burn more calories at rest with an increase muscle mass. Don't worry about adding bulk. You won't. You will tone your muscle.

Check out fitday.com. Your charts are great. Fitday is free. You can input all food and exercise. It will spit out an analysis of your nutrition, graphs of calories burned/intake. It really does help.

Mix up your exercise a bit. Your body gets used to walking on the treadmill. Try adjusting the incline, or try the arc-trainer or bike.

Cam. I know it is frustrating not to be dropping the weight, but it is healthiest to lose only 1-2 pounds a week. All the fat we lose goes through the liver. Raapid weight loss can lead to a syndrome called fatty liver disease. You literally have fat deposits on your liver and it can interfere with it's function. That is only one possibility of adverse affects of rapid loss.

I know it is frustrating to not see the results you have want. I had a plateau that lasted over 2.5 months. I promise you that the weight will come off.

Keep up the great work :hug:,
Beth

[sarahsmom73]

Yes!!! The measuring thing works!!!! I understand about the scale not moving.. It finally started to move again for me .. It was over 2 weeks of staying the same!!! I think we need to do some scale bashing!!! :cool1:

[keenercam]

This is all really great advice. I just have to internalize it. Always in the past I have just done WW and always lost 3-6 pounds the first week. That has barely happened in 3 weeks with intense exercise, so I have had to constantly force myself to keep at it. Beth, I know you and sarahsmom are right about measuring, but I haven't gotten up the nerve to do that. I can tell you that I am wearing a suit today that was comfortable for all day and Court that I couldn't even zipper a few weeks ago. So, intellectually, I am fully aware of progress. I am trying to stay off the scale, though I am not ready to do a challenge to that effect. I will weigh in again next Tuesday a.m. for my weekly WW on-line entry, but will try to stay off the scale between now and then.
I will be seeing 2 cardiologists the first week of March (the one who did my surgery and the one that I have been treating with for 10 years). I always have to weigh in at the office of the second one, so hopefully, by then there will be cause for celebration. The one who did the surgery will just be thrilled to see me on my feet, functioning, and to hear that I am exercising nearly every day and training for the half-marathon.
I am going to add new types of exercise to my regimen, starting today. I have been so hung up on walking (checking off those mile boxes on my chart) and improving that time and endurance that I have to mentally re-orient myself and encourage myself to do other types of exercise too. I may look around tonight for a new DVD or two and try to shake up my routine a bit.
Thanks again for the encouragement.

sarahsmom73 -- I am so glad to hear you broke your plateau -- that must be such a relief. Congratulations on staying strong throughout your battle with the scale. Onward and downward, right?

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

Congratulations on the suit fitting better. That is awesome.

I think weekly weighins are a good idea. I did a stay off the scale challenge and gained weight. I hope the doctors appointments go well.

Take care,
Beth

[sarahsmom73]

Won't it feel good to see your Doctors?!! They will be so proud of you!!! I know I am!!! Keep up the awesome work! :cool1:

[keenercam]

Wow! You guys are so amazing and wonderful to take the time to post to my journal. It means so much to me. Thank you! You gave me just the boost I needed yesterday.

Well, the objectives for yesterday (as written in my little journal I carry with me at all times) were:
1. Eat all WW points and at least some of my earned Activity Points
2. Dont' eat after 8 pm
3. Do some other type of exercise instead of treadmill
4. Look for or buy a new DVD for some non-treadmill exercise at home
5. Drink plenty of water, even though in court much of the day and it would be hard normally to get it all in

So, all objectives were met --
1. I used up all my points on real food (no junk food at all)
2. I finished dinner by 7:00 pm and then went to the gym. When I got home, I went right upstairs without eating anything else
3. I did the recumbent bike for 3 miles at the gym and very slowly did the treadmill for 1 mile (pain in my left achilles tendon, so I wanted to take it easy on the treadmill, but had a compulsion to do at least one mile. SICK, I know! )
4. Bought a 3 DVD set of Leslie Sansone workouts, so that I have something new and exciting. Each workout is 30 minutes, and they vary in intensity. One is all "intervals" which I have heard is very important for 1/2 marathon training. When I have that one down pat, I will feel like I have really accomplished something.
5. Drank all my water. Taking a bottle to the gym always helps.

So, I am still on track. I have reminded myself to review all I have accomplished as frequently as necessary to pat myself on the back and to keep my motivation.

My accomplishments to date:
1. On WISH since 1/17/05 -- have completed 24 days on WISH and being cheat free on weight watchers.
2. Have been on my exercise regimen since 1/20/05 -- 3 weeks today -- and have exercised a total of 15 days out of 20 days
3. Have walked or biked a total of 40.6 miles since 1/20/05 -- 23 count toward my 50 mile February challenge
4. Have exercised a total of 735 minutes since 1/20/05 -- 395 count toward my 1000 minute February challenge
5. Did not get on the scale yesterday or this morning.

Objectives for today:
1. Drink all my water
2. Eat most WW points in healthy foods (reserve only 3-5 for non-fruit type snacks)
3. Do one of my new Leslie Sansone sessions tonight, even if we go to the gym
4. Try a new piece of equipment at the gym, even if just for 5-10 minutes
5. Do not eat after 8 pm
6. Go shopping at Trader Joe's or ShopRite for more of the healthy foods that I want, but have not had time to shop for in the past 2 weeks

So, here I go.

[keenercam]

Wow, yesterday really had its ups and downs. Emotionally, I was a wreck and as I sat at the computer reading the half marathon thread, the tears were running down my face and I found myself feeling hopeless and defeated. Here I was, finally taking control of my life and my health, eating right, exercising, asserting myself over my circumstances and there is NONE of the forward progress that I expected to see after 3 weeks of doing everything right. I am so grateful that so many people pitched in and posted with encouragement and though I felt needy and embarassed, it really helped to have that support.
I feel better today and am glad I didn't crash yesterday when emotional eating could have taken over. I can't say for sure that the scale isn't moving because I have forced myself to stay off the scale each of the past three mornings, which I have only done in the past when I knew I was out of control and really didn't want to see my weight.
I met almost all my objectives yesterday, and I am going to just continue to focus on one day at a time, getting all my tools in place for any place I am going, planning ahead of time and working through it.
Yesterday, I:
1. drank all my water
2. My snack points were 1/2 a fat free muffin, some bites of ravioli, an apple, low fat cheese and cracker sticks, and a cup of whole grain dry cereal. I think of only the fat free muffin as junk points and that was only 2 points.
3. while waiting to go to the Y, I did the Leslie Sansone walk/jog tape which is 30 minutes and the calorie burn of 2.5 miles -- it also got me jogging a bit.
4. At the Y, I tried the elliptical cross-trainer and did it for 5 minutes -- only .25 miles, but at least I am not so intimidated by it anymore. Now I feel like I have a couple choices there -- treadmill, stationary bikes and cross-trainer. And my "orientation" session with a personal trainer is next Wednesday.
5. Blew objective #5 -- when we got home from the gym at about 10, I ate that 1/2 fat free muffin I had just bought, and then saw leftover ravioli in the fridge when I was packing my lunch, and ate 3 mini-ravioli. UGH! Won't do that again. Not healthy.
6. Finally got to shoprite, though still can't find cauliflower to make my new addiction -- cauliflower poppers. Will look around this weekend. Am glad to have stocked up on light string cheese, egg beaters, green beans, etc. and splurged on the muffins, which I have promised I will eat only half at a time.

Starting today in a better mood, getting myself geared up for the weekend when I will be on the go nearly every minute. Keeping myself motivated. WDW is 6 weeks away, so that helps, too.
Here's to a good weekend.

[sarahsmom73]

You are doing such a great job! Don't despair!!! It will move! :sunny:

[keenercam]

Saturday morning. Started the weekend off pretty well, eating right for dinner last night and then snacked on low fat popcorn and pirate's booty. Should have exercised, but didn't. Will go to the Y this afternoon.
My jeans fit better and I am wearing a sweet sweater in bright stripes and not feeling self-conscious. Something to be said for that. If I don't lose pounds this week, I will schedule a doctor's appointment to find out whether anything is going on -- the drug I was on for such a long time to shut down my thyroid because of my heart should definitely be out of my system by now, but I have to wonder now whether I may be even slightly hypothyroid. I guess it is always a possibility. Hopefully, though, the scale will move this week when I finally step on it Tuesday a.m. and my body will get back into the groove of dropping pounds when I am eating so much better and burning so many calories.
Packed lunch and some snacks for today. Will do Wendy's for dinner on the way to Jenn's competition, but will check the nutrition information to find out the best choices points-wise -- probably a baked potato and a small chili with no sour cream and no cheese and a side salad with fat free dressing. That should be plenty satisfying.
Our waitlist came through for all five nights for Old Key West for Easter Week -- I think the resort is so beautiful and the thought of walking there every morning that week is so appealing to me. I am already strategizing about how to get some exercise in that week at the fitness center or walking, and am not going to deprive myself of meals at Chef Mickey's or O'Hana's or LeCellier. Really looking forward to overcoming those obstacles and walking away from the experience with the satisfaction of having made good choices. Only 6 weeks from today -- can't wait!

Back to work now. At my office listening to Disney music on my ipod. Am going to be very productive for 4.5 hours and then off to the Y.

[keenercam]

Saturday p.m. -- less than an hour at the Y -- did 1 mile on TM (darn shin splints!); 3 miles on stationary bike; 5 minutes on elliptical cross trainer (.3 miles-- a drop faster than last week's .25 in 5 minutes :) ) I should definitely try to work out more on the cross-trainer -- I will be moving my arms and not just lower body and it makes me sweat, which I feel like is a sign of really burning calories.
Not sure now what we'll do for dinner on the run tonight, since none of us was hungry after the Y and didn't stop at Wendy's. Oh, well, I know that wherever we stop I will be able to find something to eat that I won't regret later.
Probably no time to work out tomorrow, unless I get to the Y right when it opens at 12 or I do a tape here. Maybe I should try Leslie Sansone's 3 mile or do the walk/jog again and really try to pick up the pace. Hmmm. . will see how I feel about it tomorrow. Definitely want to do something.

[CarolA]

Sounds like you are doing great! You are an inspiration!

Hope you have a good weekend.

[sarahsmom73]

Great Job on the exercize! Kee p it up! :cool1:

[keenercam]

Thanks, guys! Can't believe I "pigged out" in the middle of the night last night. Got home from DD's competition at about 12:30 and was starving. Thank God I only ate low fat stuff and only ate my earned activity points, still haven't touched the flexpoints. So, even if I am a bit out of control (1/2 FF muffin, ff pringles, a couple pretzels, 1 cookie, and bite of chicken in small LF tortilla), I am still in control. UGH! Not hungry today at all. Guess it all balances out. Saving flexpoints for valentines dinner out on Tuesday night. Looking forward to filet mignon or lobster or shrimp. YUMMY!
Heading to the Y to exercise --- will walk my furbaby first in the hopes that will be a good warmup and help alleviate shin splints and achilles tendon pain

[keenercam]

Sunday went pretty well --
B -- 3 sl turkey bacon & egg beaters w/salsa
L -- cauliflower "poppers"; RF triscuits w/FF ch & LF ham & pickles
D -- pot roast w/tons of veggies

Exercise -- Brisk 10 minute walk with my furbaby; .5 miles on the crosstrainer (less than 8 minutes); 3 miles on recumbent bike (less than 16 minutes); 1 mile on TM (19 mins); some leg lifts and crunches (not significant # enough to write here) while I watched the Dateline Diet Challenge. Interesting that most participants said stepping on the scale was not helpful. I have managed to keep myself off the scale since last Tuesday morning. Hoping it will show some progress tomorrow morning.

Reminding myself that I am staying on track, though it doesn't seem so much a hardship and more of a habit by now

50 miles in February exercise challenge -- 37.55 miles done; 12.45 to go
1000 minutes of exercise in February challenge --530 minutes done; 470 minutes to go
WISH -- 4 weeks
Cheat Free -- 28 days
Tomorrow I will step on the dreaded scale and see how I am doing with the 5 lbs in Feb challenge

[keenercam]

significant non-scale victory for me -- had to get ring guards put on my rings. Knowing that, and feeling them, should help me avoid all the chocolate in the kitchen here.

[pettyone]

CONGRATS ON THE NSV!! Three cheers for loose rings!!

:banana:

[keenercam]

Thanks, Tracy!

Well, I am calling this a HUGE victory for me -- I did not TOUCH (or even smell ;) ) the chocolate in the kitchen today -- all sorts of yummy stuff, and I am holding out for my carb smart mini reese's cups when I get home. YIPPEE!! Of course, I'll be here a while longer, but I just ate a lite yogurt with broken up pretzels in it (one of my snack addictions) and my tummy is full. I think I can hold out until I get home, eat a reasonable dinner, and get popcorn if DH and I get to go to the movies. YIPPEE.

The funny thing is, when I am not dieting, I have no interest in chocolate and couldnt have it (or alcohol or caffeine) for years, but for some reason when I am dieting, it does seem a temptation.

Oh, gosh, tomorrow is SCALE DAY! I will definitely have to be good tonight!

[MickeySP]

After reading your journal I am so inspired by all the work you have done. It is amazing to read from the beginning to see where you are only a month later. I am thoroughly impressed and overwhelmed.

Remember lean muscle is heavier than fat so while your weight may not drop that much you are converting from fat to muscle. Maybe one of your Drs can do a BMI test, Body Mass Index. I had one done at my start and it has dropped 13 points from exercise. I was 55.1% now at 42% it helps to know that changes are really happening in numbers.

You have encouraged me to get back on the Eliptical or as I call it the Devil's Machine.

[sarahsmom73]

So how was "the scale".... I hope great! :cool1:

[Strings]

I am sending :wizard: for today's weighin. You are doing great. I understand about the chocolate. I have no problem with it during most of the year, but come Feb/March I crave it. I think it has to do with winter being so long, and I just want to hibernate. Chocolate seems to fit in there somewhere.
Have a great day,
Beth

[keenercam]

Wow, MickeySP! Look how much you have lost! You are such an inspiration. No matter how much I try to re-orient my thinking, it is the number on the scale that still means so much to me. You must have worked so incredibly hard to lose that much and to have your BMI drop more than 13 points. Congratulations!

Hi, sarahsmom73! It is always so nice to hear from you. Well, the scale was good to me this morning -- down 2.5 pounds in a week. That made me feel really good. Of course, I'd always wish it was going faster, but I am telling myself that slow and steady wins the race! (see my little turtle guy on my ticker :) ?)

Hi, Beth! Your pixie dust worked and I am really glad that I stayed off the scale for a week! I do think I might have gotten discouraged along the way if it was 1/2 a pound up or down on any given day -- this way I see all at once the result of a whole week's worth of being on plan and exercising.

I did avoid all the regular chocolate here all day yesterday and had treats at home last night on plan -- a no pudge fudge brownie ice cream cone and 2 low carb mini reese's peanut butter cups. All that after a really delicious dinner I cooked -- a new recipe from weight watchers called bruschetta chicken.

Howard bought me such sweet, thoughtful gifts for Valentine's Day -- a beautiful burgundy glass vase with a sweet arrangement of roses, mini cala lilies and daisies and baby carnations. It is beautiful. And he bought me 3 low carb chocolate treats -- pecan delights, a chocolate bar with almonds, and reese's PB cups.

DH has been so amazing. Since I came home from the hospital I have lost a total of 18 pounds (though some of the beginning pounds were from the huge volumes of IV fluids they pumped into me -- I still have the IV hole in the back of my hand as a souvenir!) He said he is so proud of me for being on plan and exercising as soon as I felt better -- and he has been right there with me every step of the way, encouraging me to go to the gym and helping with healthy opportunities for food. Between the two of us, I am thinking we can probably keep on track for a few more months, at least! :) Looking forward to getting fitted for good sneakers will be the next motivator. Then a week later, it is the 5K. Will check the races2run.com website to find another 5K to do after that one, just to get in the habit of walking quickly on something other than the treadmill.

We are going out for our Valentine's dinner tonight and I am looking forward to all the great healthy choices this restaurant has. Of course, that means another night of no exercise (drats!) but I will get back in the habit tomorrow, with a meeting with a personal trainer tomorrow night. Very nervous about that and will have to work really hard to overcome my self-consciousness, but I keep reminding myself that I am a work in progress, and anyone who looks critically at me is not someone whose opinion I care about.

Thank you again, everyone, for your support. You make it so much easier to get through the day.

[anniet]

Keenercam, I just read your first post (and skimmed through some of the others) and all I can say is WOW!!!

How amazing!!!!! I'm going to be following your journals, and hope to meet you at the 2006 WDW half marathon!!!! :flower:

[keenercam]

Thanks, Anniet! It will be fabulous to meet you in less than 11 months! I have to say, there is no way I could have stuck with this at the low points without the support I have found here. I feel compelled to post in this journal so many times during the day whenever I am not feeling as committed as I should and also when I have cause for celebration, or just want to note an observation, so that it is here for me to look at later. I am really grateful to anyone who has taken the time and energy to post in my journal and also very grateful to everyone who shares their observations, advice, strengths and weaknesses on the WISH board or in their own journals. I am learning so much from everyone. :)

[keenercam]

Alright, I have a plan for dinner tonight, having looked at the restaurant's menu on-line.
appetizer -- jumbo gulf shrimp cocktail with cocktail sauce and lemon wedge
entree -- 2 broiled jumbo lump crab cakes w/roasted rosemary potatoes & vegetable du jour

I guess we will see if the plan is also the reality. Let's see how good my willpower is to avoid a drink or a glass of wine or creme brulee for dessert. Maybe I will allow myself a cappuccino instead of dessert, especially if it comes with one of those little biscotti! :)

[DisnyMama]

Hey Cam! :cheer2:

Good job on all your hard work. I was routing for you regarding the scale.

You are getting stronger every day.

Have a great day!! :Pinkbounc :Pinkbounc :Pinkbounc

Take care,
Shannon :earboy2:

[keenercam]

Hi, Shannon! It's so nice to see you and thank you so much for your support. I didn't step on the scale this morning -- having gone a week last week without stepping on it, and then being able to be content with what the scale said, I figure I can do the no scale challenge for a week again. :)

Wow! I had the BEST dinner last night at a really, really nice restaurant. I can't believe that I didn't have to make any sacrifices at all and walked out of there full and satisfied. I had shrimp cocktail for an appetizer, a mesclun salad with cranberries and chopped hazelnuts w/vinegarette dressing, and then 2 jumbo lump crabcakes that had almost no filler. I had even planned on dessert (berries or sorbet) and coffee or cappuccino, but had no desire for it.

Today -- my challenge is that I will be in Court all day, and we are having lunch delivered to the courthouse, so I have no idea what I will be eating and drinking (probably not enough water). So, I am just going to do my best to be disciplined/restrained, count the points, and deal with the balance later in the day. I think if I consider my lunch my main meal today and eat lightly tonight, it will be okay.

Tonight is my "orientation" at the Y (that I have been going to for weeks!). I am hoping to learn to use some of the weight machines to work on upper body in addition to the work I already do on the treadmill, recumbent bike and elliptical cross trainer. I just have to get over being self-conscious with the "fit" people at the gym, and I will be less uncomfortable working out.

My objectives for tonight -- Enjoy my experience at the gym, eat something light when I get home from there, order new running shoes & a digital watch from the runners catalog.

[pettyone]

Tonight is my "orientation" at the Y (that I have been going to for weeks!). I am hoping to learn to use some of the weight machines to work on upper body in addition to the work I already do on the treadmill, recumbent bike and elliptical cross trainer. I just have to get over being self-conscious with the "fit" people at the gym, and I will be less uncomfortable working out.


Enjoy your orientation!! :cheer2:

[keenercam]

Heading out soon to work out before someone shows me how to use the equipment :) -- Thanks Tracy for the good wishes!
Actually, all I want right now is dinner. Will have to be very disciplined not to junk out until I can get home and get some dinner.
Have already eaten fat free pringles and a few pistachios and a soup at hand that was only 70 calories (funny -- the chicken noodle and chicken & stars varieties are about 70 or 80 calories, and the classic tomato and the vegetable blend are about 120-150, if I remember correctly! I looked at the ingredients on one of them and it had high fructose corn syrup in it! WTH?!?!?!??!)

[Strings]

Hey Cam,

I hope the orientation went well. Don't worry about the fitter people at the gym. You will soon be one of those intimidating fitter people. Take care and keep away form the junk tonight.

Beth

[keenercam]

Wow! That didn't seem too bad when I was doing it, but now my arms are all shaky, and I can tell my shoulders and upper back (at the very least) are going to hurt tomorrow. Glad I did it and I will try to be disciplined about doing that workout at least 2 times a week, besides all the walking-type stuff I am doing.
The so-called "running store" at the mall turned out to be a glorified "foot locker" type place where the salespeople work on commission and have NO specialized knowledge. Disappointing, but one more reason to go to the experts.

[lizdotcom99]

Cam,

Good luck with your shoes!! It is so important to get yourself some good ones....especially when you are just starting out. I strongly reccomend Fleet Feet if you have one near you.....even if there is one that is a bit of a drive....I still reccomend it. I have ALWAYS spent a lot of money on my shoes, but until I actually got proessionally fitted I never really knew what a good fitting shoe felt like. I can also assure you that a good shoe can be a real blister preventor....and I am the queen of blisters......no blisters here!! Whoo hoo!! Make sure you get some good socks too!!! Have fun shopping!!! Your feet are going to feel sooooo good!!

:cool1: :cool1: :cool1: :cool1: :cool1: :cool1: :cool1: :cool1: :cool1:

[sarahsmom73]

Glad orientation went well!!!

I am with you on the shoes.. I need some new ones... Desperately! Let us know what you end up buying!

[keenercam]

Hi, Liz & Jen! Good morning! Well, after the unsuccessful shoe fiasco, DH and I did end up ordering shoes from a catalog that will arrive in 2 days--I ended up getting Brooks Ariel, because they were the ONLY shoe that came in 2E, which I think I probably need. DH ended up with Asics brand. Funny, I had been thinking I was wearing New Balance, but it turns out I have been wearing FILA -- I have had them 4 or 5 years, I bet -- tells you how much wear they DIDN'T get! I used to wear them just to walk to and from my parking garage, they saw 2 walked 5Ks about 3 years ago, and have had many, many MILES put on them since 1/20/05.
We will go to a real running store this weekend to see what recommendations they have, and we will compare both pairs of shoes (whatever we buy there, and what we bought risk free from the catalog -- 20% off, 6 weeks absolute guarantee to wear and return at no cost) and will decide which work for us. I really wish there were a Fleet Feet store around here, Liz, but the closest seems to be about 2 hours away. The store we are going to go to is apparently THE place to go, so we will see what they have to say. I have never had blisters. Instead, I have really bad, thick, painful callouses near the ball of my feet.

Well, I can really feel the upper body workout I did. I am on such an "up" this morning. I took a chance and bought a pair of 20WP black pants a little while ago, in the hopes they'd fit soon (they were on clearance and would be perfect for work -- couldn't resist). I had them shortened and hung them in my closet. It feels really good to be wearing them this morning, knowing they look nice with a thin gage lavender shell and a multicolored purple knobby wool blazer. So, I feel like I look better, having dropped 1+ pants size (my 22s had been painfully tight). I guess knowing I worked out last night has a lot to do with my mindset too.

So, looking at what I did right and wrong yesterday:
Right:
1. ate grilled chicken over greens with drops of vinegarette dressing for lunch, in a difficult professional/social situation
2. Didn't cop out on my orientation, though I was self-conscious
3. Left work early enough to eat dinner before going to the gym, rather than eating late
4. Actually made it through all the repetitions and sets on all of the equipment and now have a member EXERCISE log! Also did 5 minute warmup on treadmill and 5 minute cooldown on cross-trainer
5. Pursued shoes.
6. Stayed within my WW points and ate my activity points

What I did wrong:
1. Not enough servings of veggies
2. Not enough servings of dairy
3. Ate a fat free muffin and 2 low carb pecan patties right before bed -- BAD CAM!
4. Too much caffeine! UGH!

Here's to a better day

[plutosmyfav]

Hi Cam
Congrats on the new pants! Isn't it amazing when you buy something too small and ACTUALLY GET TO WHERE IT! I can recall years of buying things too small only to have them get even more too small!

:cheer2: WEIGH TO GO! :cheer2:

Sounds like you have the shoe thing in the bag :teeth: Great!

BTW, I love your play list idea. The new thread is a great place to get ideas!

Sunny

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

Great job yesterday!! I bet you look awesome in your smaller pants! Keep up the great work.'
I love the fitlinx at the Y. It keeps a running total of your weights lifted and cardio. It was really cool to see that I have lifted over a million pounds.

Have a great afternoon,
Beth

[keenercam]

Thank you, Sunny -- I hope you kept all those smaller clothes you had been holding so that you always have a place for your new fitter self as days go by! :cool1: When I lost almost 50 pounds 7/01-3/03, I had dropped from a tight 24W to comfortable 18W. I still have more than a few pounds to go to get back to where I was when I ended up in ICU ;) , but I think the pants sizes may drop more quickly since I am doing all this walking and biking.
And, I am so glad you liked the playlist. I have gotten all sorts of great ideas from others' lists too, but I am LOVING mine. I recently added pirates of the caribbean pirate: and for some reason, even though it is not as fast as some of the other stuff, and maybe because it is Disney, it really keeps me "up" and inspired. I have to print out everyone's lists and start pulling out the rest of our CD collection. And I LOVE buying new music on Itunes, knowing it is going to such a great use. So, if there is something I desperately want I can get it that way. YIPPEE!!!

Beth -- a million pounds!?!?!?!?!? OMG! That is amazing. I don't think our Y has the fitlinx, but I never would have even thought to consider how many pounds we lift total when we do those reps. That is such an awesome concept -- I was doing 3 sets of 10 with at least 20 pounds each time (a couple pieces of equipment we went a bit heavier). That is 600 pounds on each piece of equipment. I CAN'T believe I never thought of it that way -- DUH!!! How long have you been lifting, though, to have gotten to 1 MILLION? Thank you for giving me another way to quantify what I am achieving. You are a sweetie!

Geez, do you find that you are much hungrier the day after your workout? For some reason, I can't seem to stay unhungry today. I did mostly protein breakfast (hard boiled eggs w/tiny bit of LF mayo on a lite english muffin), had to have a cup of oatmeal mid morning, ate a turkey wrap w/tomatoes and pickles & a cheese stick for lunch at about 1:15, and my stomach is growling again. Very strange. Even eating gum isn't helping. I will try to hold out until about 4 and then will have a lite yogurt, maybe bulked up with some mini pretzels. Then maybe I will do a soup at hand before I head home and will go to the gym early to try to work off some of this hunger.

Thank you again, guys, for your phenomenal support! :grouphug: You really keep me on track. :love:

[Strings]

Hey Cam,

I am definately hungrier after I lift. i workout in the AM, so it is late afternoon/evening hunger for me. You workedout last night, so it makes sense that you are hungry today. Keep your belly full with water. I do either 2 or 3 sets of 12 reps. I do 14 machines. On an average day (2 sets) I lift about 28,000 pounds. I have been at the Y for almost a year.

Have a good afternoon,
Beth

[sarahsmom73]

Happy Friday Cam! :flower:

[keenercam]

Beth -- Thanks! :) That makes me feel better. So many people talk about how they are not hungry now that they are working out so much, and that just is not the case for me. It's good to know that others are hungry too when they have been lifting. But, I am NOWHERE near 28,000 pounds -- you must be so proud of yourself! I will aspire to that! :worship:

Jen -- Good morning and happy Friday to you! :wave2: I hope you have a wonderful day and are looking forward to the weekend.

I am not so worried about weekends anymore. I am making a game of finding good weight watchers program choices at all our favorite restauraunts and have found that I could make good choices even at new restaurants, so I am not so intimidated any more. Since we will be kid-less for a lot of this weekend, I am sure I will earn all SORTS of activity points! ;) (we will have lots of time at the gym, I mean) Anyway, DH and I will probably do some meals out, and I am finding that I LOVE all varieties of salads, and am making it my objective to try new salads whereever we go to eat.

Actually, what I am looking forward to this weekend is a trip to the chinese buffet. :Pinkbounc I am gaga for chinese! :crazy: Interestingly, it looks like I can eat all my favorites in moderation without doing any damage to my plan -- 3 wontons & LOTS of green onions in chicken broth (4); spicy chicken & mushrooms, with mostly the delicious mushrooms (4) over 1/2 cup steamed white rice (2); broccoli from chicken with broccoli and no chicken (2); egg roll (4). So, a total of 16 points, which is a lot, but this is my splurge and I have not touched my flex points and I am eating light today and getting lots of APs tonight. Who knows, though, if I make a lot of trips to the buffet with getting only one serving of one thing each time, I may not even end up eating that much. I think I will save the eggroll for last and may not end up eating the outside at all (I actually love the inside more). I may also try to fill up on boiled shrimp and crab legs since they are so points-friendly and eat some salad.

My plan for the day is to pay attention to how I feel -- figure out whether what I am eating is satisfying me for long enough; eat only if I am hungry; stop eating when I am full -- take as long as possible to eat, to allow myself to feel full.

It has been 3 hours since breakfast and I am not hungry at all -- it was 4 low fat turkey breakfast sausage (2) with one slice FF cheese (.5) split between 2 light english muffins (2); cofee w/low carb flavored creamer (1)--I know that seems like a lot of food, but I have been waking up so hungry and being hungry most of the day, so I thought I'd try to eat in bulk early in the day. 5.5 points for 3+ hours of satisfaction. Not bad. Drinking lots of water (already had my coffee and am switched to water now for the rest of the day).

The plan for tonight -- take DD to her rehearsal, take DS to Chinese dinner with us, take him to his camping pickup spot, then head to the gym for as long as we can stand to work out (will try to get an audiobook at the library and figure out how to load it to my ipod and take that with me to see if it makes the workout more enjoyable)

Going to the running store tomorrow. Can't wait!!! Also heading to the farmers' market for fruits, veggies, and dried fruits & nuts. New shoes should arrive Monday :Pinkbounc :Pinkbounc -- this feels better than Christmas!

[keenercam]

Okay, got through lunch pretty easily -- totally free salad except a few chick peas and drops of lite italian dressing. chinese buffet here I come!

[sarahsmom73]

How was dinner?

I am excited to hear about your new shoes!!! Activity points are good! Keep it up! You can do it!!! :cool1:

[keenercam]

Hi, Jen! Dinner was absolutely wonderful! The funny thing was, I did exactly as I had planned and saved the eggroll for last and found I was kind of full at that point. However, knowing myself and how much I'd wanted it and knowing I would think about it all weekend, I went ahead and ate it. It was really wonderful. It was so great to have a plan going into that situation -- I felt so much more able to cope and I didn't go wild. After that we went to the gym!

Saturday morning, DH surprised me with a trip to IHOP for my all-time favorite food -- harvest grain and nut pancakes. I ate 2 with drops of sugar free syrup and drank only ice water. So, I felt as if I was making good choices, but had absolutely NO IDEA how to figure the points. Took a rough guess that they might be 4-5 points each. Took the other two pancakes home (Howard insisted -- he knows I love them), and I ate about 1/2 Sunday morning and through the rest away.

Really pleased with the forward momentum -- went to the gym Friday, Saturday and Sunday for more than an hour each time and more than 6 miles mixed each time between treadmill and recumbent bike and elliptical cross trainer. I also did nautilus equipment on Saturday -- upper arms again. It hurt a lot that day, but considerably less yesterday and not at all today, so that is definitely progress. After doing it Wednesday night, I could barely lift my arms still by Saturday. I will try to do that every other day, if I can.

Finally, the day I had been waiting for arrived on Saturday and we went and got fitted for running shoes. I ended up with a pair of New Balance that are very very comfortable, though interestingly, I didn't need as wide a width as I thought and the 8.5 fits great, even though I thought I'd need to go up to a 9. It was such a relief to not have the guy, Steve, laugh when I told him I wanted a running shoe and that I plan to walk 13.1 miles in January -- he complimented me on being this disciplined this early. He knows all about the Disney Half and Full Marathons and said there are MANY people from this area who come in starting in June and July through Team in Training who are preparing for those events. So, I told him we'd certainly be back later to get another pair of the shoes and maybe by then he'd know of some people who are training for Disney.

Stayed on plan all weekend, though I am still struggling with the late night munchie monster -- working on the computer or cleaning up around the kitchen or preparing meals for the next day leaves me exposed to this weakness. Interestingly, I always have regular points or activity points I can use, and so I am not even touching my flex points when I do that late at night. Still, I know it is not healthy.

Since I have to recognize that I DO want/need/crave late night snacks, I have to figure out what kinds of snacks would be best. Stocked up Friday night on shelled almonds, pistachios and sunflower seeds as well as unsweetened banana chips and apple rings at the farmer's market. I think maybe these are the foods I should reserve for late night snacking, rather than fat free pringles and unsalted pretzels! :)

Will suffer through a meeting with our accountant tonight to work on taxes and then will reward ourselves with a trip to the gym. :Pinkbounc :bounce:

[sarahsmom73]

Cool! I am glad dinner was great!

I am excited about your new shoes! That is wonderful! They are so important!!! :cool1:

I hope you have a wonderful day! :flower:

[keenercam]

Did 3 miles on the TM last night in less than 18 minutes/mile. Not much less, but LESS. Then did 3.45 miles on the recumbent bike. I know that isn't really enough to burn any calories but it gave me another 20 minutes of activity, rather than going home to be a vegetable.

Have only lost another 1.5 this week, but the inches are definitely decreasing -- I have dropped at least one pant size and maybe a bit more.

To date this month, I have done over 60 miles TM and recumbent bike and have exercised for 960 minutes. And I have lost 5 pounds since 2/1.

I am remaining committed to this, even though the pounds are dropping so slowly. Had hoped to have lost a considerable amount of weight before seeing my cardiologists in March, but will have to accept that this is a work in progress and not a result.

[sharoncity]

Cam - I've been lurking in your journal, not posting. But I just HAD to speak up after your last post. Losing 5 lbs in 3 weeks is awesome!!!!!!! :banana: I know you want it to happen faster, but remember, it will stay off longer if you lose at a reasonable rate. And it is more important to lose inches than pounds! :teeth:

You are doing absolutely incredible. Your dedication to exercise is amazing and that is what will lead to your long term success. Keep it up!! :cheer2:

TTFN- Sharon :sunny:

[DisnyMama]

Hi Cam,

You are doing GREAT!!!! :Pinkbounc I peak at your journal every nite because you are getting very diciplined with your exercise. Reading your journal is an inspiration to me. :cheer2: :cheer2: :cheer2:

Have a great Wednesday!
Shannon princess:

[Strings]

:banana: :banana: :banana: :Pinkbounc :Pinkbounc :Pinkbounc :banana: :banana: :banana:

Hi Cam,

I just wanted to congratulate you on those awesome numbers! You are doing an incredible job. Your cardiologists will be VERY happy with your progress. They don't want you to drop a ton of weight at onece. It can stress the heart and liver. 1-2 pounds a week is ideal.

Keep up the fantastic job,
Beth

[sarahsmom73]

You are doing great Cam! :cheer2: I am very proud of you! :grouphug:

[keenercam]

Oh, boy, you guys are amazing. I was feeling so down this morning. Beating myself up over not exercising last night, choosing to get dinner at subway instead of going to the gym and just feeling like I have such an incredibly long way to go -- my "39.5 pounds to go" is only for my first big goal -- still many to go beyond that. So, here I was, feeling discouraged and hopeless and I stopped here to record last night's transgression and find you all, ready with your kind words and generous encouragement. You can't begin to know what that means to me. I know, intellectually, that I am doing okay, but still can't avoid these occasional overwhelming "downs". And here you are. My friends. My support. Thank you so much, Jen, Beth, Shannon, and Sharon. For being the hands that pull me back up. I know I can do this. I just have to look at it one day at a time. You guys have started this day great for me, and I'll be okay, thinking about what you have said.
Thanks. And I hope your days are wonderful too.

[sarahsmom73]

:sunny: I am glad it changed your outlook for the day!!!!

[keenercam]

Had a great day. Here it is almost 11 pm and I still have 1/2 point left plus the 3 activity points I have from treadmilling for 40 minutes. I am thrilled because tonight I completed my February exercise challenge. I did 1000 minutes of exercise so far this month and many more than 50 miles of treadmill and bike.
Think I will head to bed now, and reward myself with 1/2 hour reading "Wicked", which I mostly only allow myself to read while exercising.

[sarahsmom73]

Great job on meeting the Challenge!!! Way to GO! :cheer2:

[Strings]

CONGRATULATIONS CAM!!!!

Congrats on making your challenge with 4 days left!!! :cool1: :cool1: :worship: :worship: :worship:

I also love the reward you gave yourself. Something relaxing that is not food related. you are amazing. So tell me about Wicked. i saw it in B&N, but I knew that I would be getting a gift card for my bday. Is it good? it sounded intrigueing.

Take care,
Beth

[plutosmyfav]

Wow Cam!!!! Great job hitting the 1000 minute mark-- and with lots of time to spare!

You are doing fantastic ::yes::

Sunny

[keenercam]

Thanks, Beth & Sunny. I feel like such a bum, though, since I didn't have time to exercise tonight. We are going away for the weekend and tonight was the night to do the bills and other paperwork and laundry and packing! Hopefully, will have a chance to use the fitness center at our hotel or go swimming. We'll be doing a lot of walking and going up and down arena steps too, so that will have to count for something. Hopefully, back to the gym Sunday night on our return home.

Beth -- "Wicked" is very intriguing. A whole different perspective. I am thinking the Wicked Witch of the West got a majorly bad rap, though not through any fault of Dorothy's. I have really enjoyed it, even with all the very in depth discussions of religion and philosophy and politics. It is very "deep". I am hoping to take DS11 to see it on Broadway since he and I absolutely LOVE the soundtrack -- the Broadway version is a bit different from the book, much less sex and more family friendly. I don't know what kind of books you like, but this one was fun. I usually love Nora Roberts/J.D. Robb, David Baldacci, Iris Johannsen, Janet Evanovich, etc.

Back to the bills. Have a great night! Love you guys! You keep me going!

[DisnyMama]

WAY TO GO CAM!!! :cheer2: :cheer2: :cheer2: :cheer2:

Have a great weekend. :wizard:

Take care,
Shannon princess:

[sarahsmom73]

I have a student who jsut went to see Wicked! She said it was awesome!!! Be sure to go around to the stage door after the show! I told my student's dad to do it and they got pictures and autographs with the Witch! :flower:

[keenercam]

TGIF!!!! Am going to be at work only until 2 and then run a couple errands, home to finish packing and hope to hit the road after we drop Jenn off to her bus at 4. Would love to get to the hotel in time to use the pool or hot tub or fitness center tonight. Stinks to pay to stay at a nice hotel and never do anything there but sleep. Ahhhh . . . but they have free continental breakfast. DH and DS will eat bagels, muffins, etc. and I am taking baggies of pre-measured cereal. As we attend events all weekend, I will carry low-point snacks in my bag. Lunch with our friends tomorrow could be hard but I have 31/35 flex points left for the week that ends Monday, so I should have some flexibility.
I hope all my WISH friends have a successful and enjoyable weekend.

[pettyone]

I am taking baggies of pre-measured cereal. As we attend events all weekend, I will carry low-point snacks in my bag. Lunch with our friends tomorrow could be hard but I have 31/35 flex points left for the week that ends Monday, so I should have some flexibility.
I hope all my WISH friends have a successful and enjoyable weekend.

You are one heck of a planner!!

I hope you have a successful & enjoyable weekend too!!!

[sarahsmom73]

Have an AWESOME weekend!!! :cool1:

[keenercam]

Just checking in briefly on my way out to Court. Work has been so crazy.
Wonderful weekend. Really "splurged" on Sunday with cinnamon toasted almonds but didn't eat breakfast or lunch. Did pretty well with food all weekend except for that and stayed within points! YEAH!!! Did 2 miles on the treadmill Saturday morning at the hotel, which I am proud of. Wish I had done it Sunday, as well. Only exercised 3 times last week, unlike previous weeks of 5-7 workouts. Getting back on track this week, especially now that the snow seems to have diminished. 5K this Saturday. Nervous, but okay about it.

February was a pretty successful month. Here are my accomplishments:
-- Worked out a total of 18 days
-- worked out total of 1040 minutes
-- walked/biked 70 miles + several upper body workouts
-- lost 6.5 pounds
-- have completed 43 cheat free days (totally on WW points)

March -- here I come!

[Strings]

:cool1: :Pinkbounc :cool1: Cam your stats for February are AWESOME!

You are doing a great job. Keep it up.
Have a great night,
Beth

[sarahsmom73]

Awesome job!!! :banana:

[keenercam]

Okay, good start to March with 50 minutes of exercise last night. Can't believe I ate all my AP points, but I've read I should be doing that all the time, so I am not even going to think about it. 5K walk on Saturday. Hoping my achilles tendon is less painful by then. Made an appt with the doctor for next Thursday to talk to him about it. Will hope for some quick resolution.
Unfortunately, with work so crazy busy I have so little time now to journal, etc. Trying to stay on top of all that, but figure sticking to the plan and exercising are more important than writing about it.

[sarahsmom73]

I hope your achilles feels better soon! :flower:

[plutosmyfav]

Hi Cam

Oooooh I can relate to the achilles tendon pain! I have gotten it a few times since I started running. I know one time was definitely due to improper running shoes. I'm not sure about the others. At one point I used a gel arch support insert and it really helped. Hope the dr has some words of wisdom. Do share when you find out!!!!!!! Right now I'm battling knee pain. Blah!

I usually eat all my APs, too. I *try* to not use my flex though.

You are doing great-- keep up the great work!!!!!

Sunny

[keenercam]

Thanks, Jen & Sunny! I can't believe I am doing this and staying on track for this long. I really think the exercise is the big difference for me this time. I just feel so much healthier. I actually have to remind myself that I am not fit, that I have to take it easy and not overdo it.
Sunny, everytime I see your 70 pound clippy, I am so blown away and inspired. I can't even imagine losing that much -- you must be so proud of yourself.

Well, I took it "easy" last night and only did 5 miles on the bike and then 1/2 hour upper body nautilus stuff, thinking I would give my achilles tendon a break. Still painful today. Howard said I really need to stretch it for at least 5 minutes before I hop on a treadmill or bike. The real problem with that is that I am so self conscious about sitting on a mat at the gym and stretching and if I do it (stretch and warm up) at home before I go, by the time I get to the gym, my muscles aren't warm any more.

Okay, I haven't challenged myself to go outside my comfort zone in a while, so I guess it is time. I am challenging myself to sit on that mat tonight at the Y and stretch for 5 minutes before I get on the treadmill.

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

I understand how you feel. I don't like stretching in front of people either. I just do it. It is a necessity for a safe workout, and everyone is focused on their own workouts.

Keep up the great work.
Beth

[keenercam]

Thanks, Beth. I went there with every intention of doing the stretching thing but the mat was wall to wall people, some of them working with personal trainers, and I didn't want to wait. So, I biked 3 miles before stepping on the treadmill for 2 moderate miles at a pace just around 18 minutes a mile. Tomorrow night I will do something very low impact in preparation for Saturday. And I WILL stretch tomorrow night and Saturday morning.

Well, here I am 8 weeks post-surgery. Hard to believe 8 weeks ago, I was barely conscious at this time and definitely did NOT believe the doctor as he told me I was cured. I can't even believe now the person I was then. Sure, I am still fat. But my outlook has changed. I can do something about it and I am. I have hope again. It's been about 10 years since I felt hopeful. There were more times than I can count including through the three previous surgeries, when I really wondered whether I would live to see my daughter graduate high school. I couldn't even imagine living long enough to see my son graduate-- I was diagnosed and rushed to a hospital when he was just 19 months old. I hadn't realized until recently that I wasn't taking very good care of the body that I am in partly because I didn't really expect to need it too long. Besides all of that, I am really lazy, and my "illness" was good enough reason to not exert myself. After all, if the doctors were concerned about me exerting myself, I definitely shouldn't do it, right? And the food? Heck, life is short! Eat dessert first and often. After all, it's not as if anything I could have done would have changed the very serious flaw in my heart. Why not feel sorry for myself and indulge myself?
So, there is where I was.
Here is where I am. Taking a day at a time, sure, but always now with my eye on a long-term and somewhat ambitious goal. Once in a while, I take a real good look at this body and know it has such a long, long way to go. But, tonight, I have no doubt at all it will be here for the "long run." Who knows, maybe someday I will "wog" the half! After all, Mickey is there! What more motivation could this girl ask for?

[sarahsmom73]

Thanks for having such a positive outlook! I needed that today! :flower: You are an amazing woman! Keep it up!

[keenercam]

Well, I did it! Walked a 5K in less than an hour. 3.1 miles in 54 minutes and 50 seconds. That will be my exercise for the day, and it seemed so much more real than walking on the treadmill -- my walking buddy and I are going to try to find a place to walk outside, maybe on the walking path at our local shopping center, around the fountains -- I have to find out what the path is like and the distance of it.

Stayed on plan yesterday, too, even with going to the movies -- ate two healthy choice hot dogs on wonder light before we went, and took light popcorn, almonds, and low carb kit kats with me, with a bottle of water. What a great day. I am sure I burnt some serious calories laughing so hard at "The Pacifier" too. Vin Diesel was adorable, too, with those gorgeous brown eyes!

After the 5K, we went to where they had all the food and I ate 1/2 banana and 1/2 philly pretzel, and think it is getting so much easier to stay on plan. Lisa -- ZerasPride -- said something so profound in a recent post when someone was talking about temptation -- "I know what that [fill in the blank] tastes like -- I don't need to taste it" or something like that. I keep telling myself -- I know what that tastes like -- I don't need it. I have NO idea what THIN feels like, so I will work to be in a position to see what that feels like. My WW leader used to say "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels". I can't wait. Even though I don't weigh anything near my lowest of my adult life (189 on my wedding day 20+ years ago), I know I am more fit than I have ever been in my life. And getting better every day!

Doing this one day at a time. Can't wait to cross that finish line in Disney. I can't even imagine . . . but trying to imagine it keeps me going!

[DisnyMama]

:cool1: Cam, I am so proud of you for doing so great in the 5K!!! :cheer2:

Accomplishments are definately more satisfying. Have a wonderful and successful rest of the weekend.

Take care,
Shannon :banana:

[sarahsmom73]

WTG CAM!!!! :cool1: You are doing great! Just think! You'll be wearing a Mickery medal soon! :flower:

[keenercam]

Oh, criminy! It is 11:12 pm and I have been in my office since 8:30 a.m. and another 5+ hours yesterday. I am soooo totally FRIED! Thank God Howard brought food for me and my secretary -- subway 6" turkey w/lettuce, tomatoes & sweet peppers; a garden salad w/ff dressing; and a bag of light chips. Just ate a 3pt fat free brownie -- YUM!!! I am not even going to think of any more food tonight. Just have to meet this midnight deadline and get home to bed without falling asleep. Glad I had a fat free brownie here as I was certainly feeling I was entitled to an indulgence -- that really hit the spot.
Really bummed because I didn't get to exercise today -- I had no idea I would ever feel this needy about exercising. Now I really regret a day when I can't exercise.
More tomorrow. . . when I am conscious!

[sarahsmom73]

Cam!

Take care of you! :grouphug:

[keenercam]

How the heck am I going to get through this day? I am so wiped out. It is a heck of a time to give up caffeine, but I HAVE to figure out whether it is hampering my weight loss. Staying awake without it should be a challenge. Right now, I need a nap already and it is only 8:15 a.m

Well, at least I worked out last night -- 6miles bike (30:10); 1 mile elliptical trainer (16:05); and upper body circuit. 70 minutes total. Then had small bruster's frozen mint chocolate chip yogurt. Yum. Was good at wendy's for dinner too -- small chili over baked potato and side salad with no dressing.
Today will be another crazy busy day at work, with emergency brief due at 5. Have to keep reminding myself we will be in WDW in only 18 days -- that will keep me going.
Down only a pound this week -- that darn scale. Total on WISH since 1/17 (7 weeks) is only 11.5 pounds.
Haven't even had a chance to check in on other journals and see how everyone is doing.
Geez, the dratted phone.

[pettyone]

Have to keep reminding myself we will be in WDW in only 18 days -- that will keep me going.


Yea!!! I'm soooooooo green with envy!!! You're going to have a blast!!

BTW: I think that 11.5 pounds is awesome!! Although you're frustrated, remember how much better you feel and how hard you've worked...you have been rockin'!!!

:cheer2:

[plutosmyfav]

Hi Cam,

You'll make it through the withdrawal and feel great soon-- I promise! I gave up caffiene 3 years ago and don't miss it one bit. But it sure was tough at first.

Your weightloss is great, don't get discouraged if its not fast, slow is the way to go for long-term success. You are doing great! :cheer2:

Sunny

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

You are doing awesome. 11.5 is a great number since january. Good luck giving up caffiene. you will feel better eventually, I've heard. I've never even attempted it.

Have a great night,
Beth

[DisnyMama]

Hi Cam,

About 2 years ago I gave up caffein on my doctors advice due to we thought that maybe it was irritating my stomach. I love coffee and loved my caffein which I still miss to this day but I have done just fine without it. Actually, I do not have the highs and lows during the day. I stay at a pretty even pace all day as long as I watch my sugar intake. I do drink coffee just decaf and I drink caffein free diet coke (religiously). By the way, your weight loss is steady and consistent. Just think of the stamina that you now have to get through work days such as the ones you are experiencing. I am so impressed with your continued excercise regimine that you really push yourself to stay with. The proper eating and the excercising are now a part of you :cheer2:

Be good to yourself and take care,
Shannon princess:

[sarahsmom73]

Make that 17 you lucky stick!!! :cool1:

Bash that scale if you need to!!!

[keenercam]

Wow. I cannot believe I haven't been here in days! It has been such a busy week with craziness at work and doctors' appointments.

Everything went really well at Hopkins on Wednesday -- the doctor who did my surgery was so thrilled to see how well I am doing and I had my first normal EKG in more than 10 years. I asked them to print an extra strip for me and I am going to have it framed for my office, to remind me of my second chance.

I have been doing very well with staying within my points, but find I am snacking more, using the extra points I get for exercising to be able to eat fat free unsalted pretzels and fat free pringles or other chips. I am trying to eat more points earlier in the day, rather than hoarding them for dinner and late night eating. I am also forcing myself to meet the milk and vegetable requirements every day. And tonight I will go shopping for a good multi-vitamin, hoping to find something with calcium, since my mother has osteoporosis.

I have not had any caffeine at all over the past several days. Severe headaches the first couple of days, but I think I am past that now. Hoping to see a marked improvement in the weight loss, switching to decaf coffee.

Saw my family doctor yesterday for severe achilles tendonitis and to talk about my general health now that I am exercising so much. His eyebrows went up when he realized my official weight loss since 1/6/05 is 19 pounds -- I don't think it is that much, but he insists on running some blood tests to be sure everything is okay. Heck 19 pounds in 63 days isn't THAT much!?!?!? I actually think I should be losing much, much more. Since 1/17, on my home scale, I had only lost 11.5 pounds in 7 weeks -- that is nothing! I swear, if my tests show I am hyperthyroid or something like that and they attribute the weight loss to that rather than me busting my butt dieting and excercising, I am going to freak.

I see my regular cardiologist today, who I last saw in September. He will be thrilled to see me doing well and CURED!!! since he originally diagnosed me and had me rushed to a hospital in February 1995. Hoping his ego won't be injured, that I went to Hopkins for this latest procedure, rather than his local colleagues.

On to more important things -- exercise is going great -- going to the Y nearly every day for at least an hour. Really dependent on doing that, feel very unhappy if I don't. Hoping this will sustain.

work beckons.

[keenercam]

Did TM tonight -- first mile was 17:24 and the second mile was 17:09. Also did 4 miles on the recumbent bike in less than 20 minutes. Hoping to get to the gym tomorrow after dropping Jenn and her friend off to rehearsal, and before the craziness of the show starts.
Made cookies tonight and had absolutely no desire to eat any. Of course, looking at the nutrition information and seeing that one cookie was 130 calories and 6 grams of fat almost made me sick to my stomach. Good.

[sarahsmom73]

Awesome Cam!!! You are doing great!!! :cheer2:

[sharoncity]

Cam- Just wanted to post and let you know I think you are doing absolutely amazing!!! 19 pounds in 8 plus weeks is wonderful!!! :banana: Remember, this weight didn't go on overnight and it is NOT going to come off overnight!!! :Pinkbounc

Keep going with that exercise! I am SO impressed that you go every day! How do you do that with working a demanding job and two kids?????? I can't seem to find the time in my days.... :confused3

I am in awe of all you have accomplished. And I especially love how you have learned to appreciate your life and value yourself. :love: WTG!!! :cheer2:

Have a great week! WDW is just around the corner!!

TTFN- Sharon :sunny:

[pettyone]

Cam--

YOU'RE DOING GREAT!! I'm so glad that your appointments went well! You are a warrior!!

[keenercam]

Thank you so much Jen and Sharon and Tracy--
You guys are awesome cheerleaders! :cheer2: I truly appreciate the support. :grouphug:

Sharon -- I am really trying to remember what you said about the weight not going on over night. It is really hard, though, when I have SOO much to lose. I keep thinking that every pound I lose is one less I have to carry through that 1/2 marathon. But here we are 299 days out and I am intimidated by the enormity of this undertaking. :guilty: I told one of my partners today what I am doing. This is the same guy who said to me last week "Do you have any idea at all whatsoever how much better you look?" He had been so amazing through my illness and I figured that telling him I am training to walk the 1/2 will help me stay on track even more.
So, after a truly horrendous day yesterday where I blew nearly all my week's flex points, I was totally back on track today, stayed within the daily points plus earned 7 or 8 activity points that I didn't entirely use. :banana: Went to the gym tonight, did 6 miles on the bike in 28:35 and 1 mile on the cross trainer in 17:10. The only downside is that I am eating dinner this late (at the computer). As you can see, guys, I am NOT doing that great about fitting the exercise in my schedule-- I've just expanded my schedule instead! Small price to pay, though.

Hey, you know what? There is another wholly unexpected benefit to all this. My DH who is the most amazing man on the face of the earth, has always found me extremely attractive, regardless of my weight (I think he is just a poor, crazy, desperate male! :) ), but he is even more complimentary now -- telling me how his arms will soon go around me twice, pointing out that my pants are baggy, etc. And another thing -- he is working out right there, with me, training too, and getting so incredibly outrageously BUFF! OMG, I feel like I burn calories just looking at him. :love:

Thanks again, everyone for being so supportive and giving me a refuge here filled with friendship and encouragement. Love you all! :love:

[sarahsmom73]

YAY!!! You sound so positive! And you are right! Every pound is one less! You are doing great and I am happy to be a support for you! :grouphug:

[keenercam]

Well, it is time for me to look at the past week,figure out what I did right and what I did wrong and enjoy the progress.

Lost another 2 pounds this week, bringing the total since I started WISH on 1.17.05 to 13.5 pounds. Total since surgery 24, I think.

This month -- have lost 3 pounds so far.
Have exercised 10 days out of 14 for a total of 555 minutes
Have exercised 56.6 miles (bike, TM, cross-trainer) as well as several upper body workouts on nautilus equipment.
Have stayed within WW points since 1.17.05 for a total of 57 days on-plan.

Hoping by the time we leave for WDW on 3/26 to have all exercise done for the month (miles and minutes) and to lose at least another 3 pounds.

Goals for WDW 3/26-3/31 -- stay OP entire time by earning APs to compensate for meals at Chef Mickey's and O'Hana's. Eat Easter brunch t Chef Mickey's and eat only salads and vegetables for the rest of that day. Try to find nutrition information ahead of time for food at O'Hana's and eat lightly that day until dinner.
Work out in the resort's fitness center at least 2 mornings of our four mornings there.
Walk, walk, walk!

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

You will certainly be able to log some miles at WDW.

Congrats on the loss. I think you are doing an amazing job. keep it up.
Beth

[sarahsmom73]

Awesome job on the loss! :cheer2:

[Blueeyes101817]

hi! just wanted to say thanks for coming to my journal! you shound like you are doign great--have a great trip!

[plutosmyfav]

Hi Cam
Sounds like your on plan and have a great plan for your trip!

Keep rockin' :goodvibes

Sunny

[keenercam]

Thanks so much, Beth, Jen, "The other Jen (:) ), and Sunny! I really appreciate your support.
Wow! My trip is just 9 days away. The one good thing about not having lost a ton of weight the last couple months is that I haven't yet dropped down into the next lower WW points range. :) Sick, I know! So, I will have that 2 point cushion each day. I have gotten so dependent on the AP points, not necessarily using them, but knowing they are there as a cushion. So, I will be very careful while we are away. I am really looking forward to the shrimp skewers at O'Hana's. Those are low points and absolutely delish. Writing down a plan for each restaurant before we go really helps me re-orient myself when it is finally time to order dinner. I already have a grocery list for when we get there, too, so we will have healthy snacks in our villa, that I can take the parks each day. I actually enjoy the challenge! Howard being so supportive and into the exercise thing, too, really helps. When we were in Syracuse a couple wekends ago, we both got up early to go to the fitness center. We will encourage each other to do the same this trip.
Only 10 more sleeps!

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

Your plan for WDW sounds great. Just allow yourself some room to fudge a bit without guilt. It IS a vacation. You will know how to get back on track, IF you fall off program.

I am loving Wicked. I am to where Dorothy arrives. I love the political slant to it. I can also really relate to Elphie. I haven't listened to the music yet, I always like to read the book first. I will check it out soon though. I also plan on reading Confessions of the Ugly Stepsister.

take care,
Beth

[sharoncity]

OMG Cam!!!!!! I forgot, DS used to always count down to vacations by how many more "sleeps"!!!! "10 more sleeps till we go to WDW!!!!" :earboy2: THANK YOU for that wonderful reminder of a beautiful memory! :flower:

I hope you have an absolutely wonderful vacation! It sounds lovely!! :sunny: And I am so happy that DH is so supportive. That makes such a difference for your weight loss journey. Enjoy!! :wizard:

TTFN- Sharon :sunny:

[sarahsmom73]

We do the thing about sleeps!!! :cool1:

[keenercam]

So, Beth -- Wouldn't you say Elphaba got a bad rap? I think she needed a new PR person. Have you figured out yet who the Cowardly Lion, Tin Man, and Scarecrow are? I can't wait to see how those revelations are made in the play, but the music is wonderfully subtle but rich as far as the Scarecrow goes. I hope you get to listen to the music -- I think you will really like it.

Sharon and Jen -- I read the "sleeps" thing on the boards a while ago, and somehow it really stuck with me as sweet and darling. I just have to get through the days.

Well, I did great last night at dinner. We went to a pizza place and I had a thin crust slice with a ton of veggies and a garden salad (most of which I brought home). I was so full from the pizza that I didn't eat anything except a few low carb turtles when I got home. So, I only used my daily points allowance, did lots of very low-key ab crunches when I got home (100), and didn't eat after 8 pm.

Already started today with a lot of points because I woke up so hungry. Had a 7:00 a.m Dr. appt., stopped for decaf coffee on the way to work, and then ate two lean breakfast pockets when I got here. Will probably do a huge garden salad (maybe with some cheese) for lunch and a soup at hand (I know I should be avoiding the mega-sodium, but they are a quick lunch). I think I have an apple, a yogurt (especially since I am on mega doses of antibiotics) and a string cheese for late afternoon munching. Glad to know I am leaving work early (6 pm) for a 6:30 perm appt. YEAH!! Hopefully, it will look great for WDW.

Still hoping I will feel remarkably better for Saturday's 5k. UGH! The thought of brunch at Panera bread afterwards will help motivate me. Sick, I know!

[keenercam]

went to the gym, even though I felt lousy. Did 6.4 miles on the recumbent bike in 30:30 and did the upper body nautilus machines for 20 minutes. Feels good that I went, even though I don't feel good by any stretch of the imagination. Saturday is fast approaching. Hope I can breathe through my nose by then -- my lips are so chapped.

was craving shrimp -- bought some on the way home tonight -- 8 oz already steamed and peeled shrimp for dinner. YUM! Low points for something that is so delicious.

[sarahsmom73]

I am so rpoud of you for heading to the gym even though you didn't feel like it!!! :cool1:

[Blueeyes101817]

awesome for going to the gym when you didnt feel like it!!!! i know that feeling all too well..i cant go today, my mom said my stitches will get pulled if i go e very day--errr
have a great weekend!

[keenercam]

Thank you, guys. Geez, I didn't have to get up to drive Jenn to school this morning and,therefore, overslept. Got into work so late, so I am already behind schedule :sad2: Kind of glad now we aren't going to Boston this weekend with DD -- I have so much to get done. Am looking forward to cleaning out all my drawers and my closets, getting rid of stuff that is too big, and organizing stuff that I am aspiring to wear. I have so much that is just plain worn out, that I have to get rid of. Making the time to do it has been a problem and it is like having a 2 ton gorilla on my back always knowing there is something I haven't done. Will help DS organize his closet and drawers, too, and will pull out summer clothes so everyone can find some stuff for WDW.

So, the plan for today --
B -- whole wheat toast and decaf coffee
mid morning -- oatmeal
L -- tuna salad and crackers
Leave work, pick DD up at school, run to the grocery store for food for her and her roomies' kitchenette at their hotel and shrimp for DH and me for dinner, take DD home, supervise packing, drive her to her bus
Make light popcorn at home and go to movies with DS to see Ice Princess (?)
Home for shrimp dinner -- yummy. Do paperwork. To bed early.

Saturday -- up early for 5K. Do 5K. Home for shower. Panera Bread for brunch, pick up DS from Boy Scout hiking, home to clean closets and drawers and start pulling stuff together to pack

WOW. We don't have plans for anything else for the rest of the weekend until we have to get Andy to play practice Sunday night and pick up Jenn at midnight Sunday night. Will definitely go to my parents' on Sunday and bring dinner with us there, so that that is controllable. Will also go to the gym Sunday night while DS is at play practice.

My biggest challenge for the weekend will be NOT to pig out at the movies on movie popcorn -- will take my own, and some other small munchies, so that I am not even tempted. Maybe DS will get a kidpack, which will make it SOO much easier on me. :teeth:

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

I loved Wicked. It really made me think about things. I will send you a pm eventually about it.

When you are done with your closets, want to do mine?;)

Enjoy the movie. I am planning on taking Katie next week.
Have a great weekend.
Beth

[keenercam]

Wow! So much to log.
Went to the movies last night -- ate my own light popcorn and a diet soda. The movie was absolutely wonderful. So glad DD wants to go see it since I'd love to see it again.
Then to dinner at Red Lobster -- ate only 2 coconut shrimp (hard to resist); garden salad with lemon; a bite of a cheddar biscuit; and rock lobster with scallops and seasoned broccoli. Not bad.

Did the 5K this morning -- official time 51:42. Pace 16:41/mile. The 16 minute pace is looking very do-able -- then I will aspire to 15 minutes or better, to give myself a cushion for character pix, etc.

Brunch this morning at Panera bread -- low fat black bean soup, 9 grain bagel w/low fat honey walnut cream cheese. YUMMY! Definitely feel I had the points to spend on a nice brunch, after doing the walk.

Doing a shrimp stir fry for dinner with loads and loads of veggies.

Tomorrow will be the bigger challenge, assuming we go to my parents' house. We will definitely bring dinner with us. I'm such a "control freak"

[Blueeyes101817]

my mom just took my little cousins to that movie :)
have a great day!

[keenercam]

Hi, everyone -- Did 30 minutes of upper body nautilus -- 12x3 @30lbs -- upped the weight and the number
Did 1 mile on TM at incline of 2.0 for the first time and did it in 17:10
Did 6 miles on the bike in 28:45

Still having a problem with the scale, which is so bizarre. I can feel the muscles in the fronts of my thighs and in the tops of my arms, and yet the scale is not dropping. Am going to stop eating my exercise points this week and see how that goes with a final weigh in before we leave Saturday.

[sarahsmom73]

Great job on the Treddie! :cool1: Keep it up! You are doing great! :cool1:

[keenercam]

Well, I am totally distressed. I am not losing weight. How the heck is that possible? Actually, Howard thinks he knows exactly what is going on. Strange as it sounds, he says I am exercising too hard?!?!? Apparently, there is a rate at which you burn calories and then beyond that level of activity, you burn sugar, but not fat? So, all the two months I have been exercising, I have been building muscle and not burning fat. My clothes do fit differently and I feel stronger and more fit, but the scale is NOT dropping at all whatsoever. Since that has always been such an important measure to me, I have been really discouraged and kept hoping it would just catch up.

What to do about this? I have to stop thinking about the past two months as "wasted". DD16 reminds me, "Mom, those 2 months were not wasted. You got stronger. After so long of not being able to exercise, look at all you can do now. You walked those 5Ks and you are able to exercise every night. And muscle is important, too." I think I am going to take it down a notch, work on firming by doing upper body nautilus, get trained on lower body nautilus, walk at a much more sedate pace on the TM, and bike at a much more sedate pace on the recumbent bike. I am also going to work on doing situps and ab crunches. I won't be able to "workout" much starting this Friday, for a week, though I should be pretty active in WDW. Will avoid the scale, as well, for the next week and a half, and see how it looks on 3/31 when we get back.

Wish me luck. I really don't want to be discouraged. I want to remain committed and optimistic. Thanks, everyone, for your support.

[plutosmyfav]

Hi Cam,

Oh I feel your pain! I am hardly losing at all and also wonder if I'm exercising too much. But it definitely is not wasted time. All that new muscle burns calories 24/7. The change in clothes is real and the scale will budge someday. Enjoy WDW and don't let it get you down.

Sunny

[CarolA]

One of life's sad truths.... muscles weigh more then fat... HOWEVER... muscles do not jiggle which is a great improvement.

Are you doing measurements? You might find that you are shrinking! LOL! Muscles aslo take up less space then fat for the weight.

I really think that is what is happening... you are burning fat, but you are also building muscle. The trade off is not always on the scale. As you DD said LOOK at what you have accomplished. I bet your clothes fit better too.

[keenercam]

Thank you so much, Sunny and CarolA. I really appreciate the encouraging words. Even though I haven't been taking measurements, I know they are shrinking. I have definitely dropped at least one size, and maybe two, since I can now wear some stuff that didn't fit before, and I can breathe in clothes that I was pretending fit before. :)

I AM pretty bummed that with all this exercise the pounds aren't dropping off -- there are certain weight goals that are SO important to me. But I will be patient, because I can actually feel the muscles in the front of my thighs and the front of my upper arms. And I figure sooner or later the pounds will have to come off, right? We pulled out summer clothes on Saturday and many of my old shorts fit. I have one pair that is huge on me and I was going to throw them on the Goodwill pile and Howard said, "you should definitely save those to be the ones that you hold up and say 'these used to fit me, now two of me would fit in them'". Wasn't that sweet of him? So, I did. I kept them. They are sitting on my dresser now and I will look at them every so often, and remind myself that they fit last summer and that they will never fit again.

Thanks again, guys. While I have been in a panic about not having "workout" time next week, I am really beginning to persuade myself that it might just be the "test" I need to see if I would do better with more consistent, moderate exercise rather than more deliberate, intense exercise 5-7x/week.

[sharoncity]

Cam - I COMPLETELY understand about the certain weights meaning so much. But bottom line is how we look and FEEL. If you are shrinking, getting in smaller sizes, then you are doing great!! :cool1: And you KNOW that you are getting healthier! The weight will eventually come off, but as long as you are losing inches, you are successful!! :cheer2:

Have a wonderful vacation! Relax and enjoy it! I think you are well prepared to stay OP and not have a set back. Just stick to it!! :banana:

TTFN- Sharon :sunny:

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

I have to tell you. I was scale stalled for a long time. I was losing inches, but so discouraged at not losing pounds. Well, about 5 weeks ago, I started dropping pounds. I am averaging 2 pounds a week. I didn't change my exercise, it just started to catch up. The same thing will happen for you. You have not wasted that time. You are stronger and healthier. Your plan sounds great.

If I don't pop in sooner, have a fabulous trip. We'll want details.
take care,
Beth

[keenercam]

Thanks everyone, for your encouragement.
Well, I took a good look at the recumbent bike last night and set it on fat burn. Interestingly, it slowed my pace all the way to 58-62 RPMs and added resistance. In no time at all, I had worked up a sweat, and I did that for 45 minutes. I really feel like I accomplished something. (I had been doing about 85RPMs -- very fast, comparatively.) I will do the same the next time I am on the treadmill and the cross-trainer to see where I should be, speed and resistance-wise on them.

I splurged last night and had a caramel apple empanada at Taco Bell for dessert. It was worth every one of the 7 points, but I will NOT be doing that again. :) I am glad I had the points to do it, so I am still cheat free. Hope I can still say that by the time we return from WDW.

[sarahsmom73]

Way to go Cam!!!! It is nice to treat yourself every once and a while!

[pettyone]

:wave:

We're missing you around here!!!

Happy Easter!!

[kris1973]

You really are doing a great job. Keep up the good work. Have a supper great Easter.

Kristin

[keenercam]

Thanks, everyone. Popping in real quick while packing to write down how wonderful I feel right now, so that I will remember this :banana:

I bought a gorgeous painted misses top today at Kohl's, with sequins and beads -- it is a scene from Central Park. In the misses department. It is soo beautiful. I fell in love with it, and said to Jenn, "I am so bummed. They don't have this in women's sizes. I am going to buy the XL. It will fit me some day. I'll hang it up and look at it and have it to look forward to." Well, on a whim, I tried it on. Not only does it fit -- Jenn said "That looks SO GREAT on you!" Then she told her best friend on the phone, "My mom is trying on clothes and everything she puts on looks nice. You should see her. She is so excited." What a fun day!

I am going to wear it Sunday when I see Mickey :love: Even though I bought a gorgeous sweater for Easter, I am going to wear this instead. Somehow, it represents everything I have accomplished so far. Shallow, maybe. :rolleyes:

I am actually looking forward to getting dressed these days, instead of dreading trying to find something to wear in my closet.

You guys are all so amazing. :love1: You kept me going through the really rough times, so that I could get through to this -- the beginning of payoff time!

Happy Easter, everyone! You are all blessings to me that I thank God for. I probably won't get to check in again before we leave, but I am looking forward to catching up on everyone's journals when I get back.

God Bless.

[DisnyMama]

Cam, have a wonderful Easter at WDW! :Pinkbounc
Enjoy the new and improved you!!! I look forward to hearing about your trip when you get back.

Take care,
Shannon princess:

[stemikger]

That is great. I love hearing good news.

However, your old bad habits are my daily diet. I have to get on the right track soon.

:cheer2: You go girl!!!!

[sarahsmom73]

Good for you!!! :cool1: I hope you have an awesome Easter at WDW! princess:

[Blueeyes101817]

hope youre having a great time!!

[keenercam]

Hi, everyone! I hope everyone is having a wonderful week. We got back from WDW yesterday mid-day, and I am looking forward to making notes here of everything we did and how I did on Weight Watchers while we were away.

We packed those four days with so much great stuff! With our determination to avoid the crowds in the parks, each day, we went somewhere or did something that we had never had the opportunity to go, and it made the trip that much more fun. The "new places" were:

Sunday -- DisneyQuest
Monday -- Mickey's Magical Milestones Tour in MK
Lunch at Liberty Tree Tavern
Went to Wide World of Sports Complex (wanted to see where the expo will be for the 1/2 marathon)
Ate at All American Cafe
Tuesday -- Did "Sounds Dangerous" at MGM and
ate at Sci Fi Dine-In Theatre (FUN!)
Wednesday --Miniature Golf at Winter Summerland
Ate at Electric Umbrella
Did Extra Magic Hours at the MK which went midnight - 3am (we left ~2)

I found all kinds of great things to eat whereever we went, and never deprived myself of anything I wanted -- I just shared it with my family, and that made the points reasonable. It helps that my WW week starts on Tuesdays because that put the first 2 days of my trip in last week's flex points count and put Tuesday and Wednesday in this week's flex points count. With Chef Mickey's brunch on Easter Sunday and O'Hana's date night with Howard on Tuesday, that worked out perfectly. I am going to do a mini-trip report of the restaurants we ate at on the WISH board so that others will have some idea of the great choices we found around "the World".

Let's see, what else? Oh, yeah, I didn't gain any weight at all. I actually lost 2 pounds between last Tuesday and this morning. With all the walking we did, and the fact that I worked out in the resort's fitness center twice, I am thrilled!

Well, back to work. Have to catch up. But wanted to check in here and thank everyone for their support and encouraging words before I left -- knowing I'd get to journal how well everything went, really helped me stay on track. Accountability is a great motivator for me!

[sarahsmom73]

Welcome back!!! Thanks for sharing!

[keenercam]

Okay, time to do the end of the month recap for myself.

Challenged myself to exercise 1000 minutes -- did 1015 minutes "exercise" plus another 480 minutes of walking in WDW
Challenged myself to walk/bike 70 miles -- did 138.6 miles + all those WDW miles that I couldn't count
Challenged myself to lose 5 pounds -- did exactly that
Challenged myself to stay on plan in WDW -- did it
Challenged myself to use the resort fitness center 2 times during our 4 days there -- done

Okay. Feels good. Even though the pounds aren't dropping, my clothes show results of my efforts (will need all new shorts for summer as even my "skinny" shorts were too big this week -- can't wait to see what size I will need 6 weeks from now)

[plutosmyfav]

Cam,

I am so proud of you :cheer2: :cheer2: :cheer2:

You met all your goals! You are doing so fantastic. Keep it up!!!!

Sunny

[DisnyMama]

:cool1: Cam, Glad you had a great and successful trip. Wow, 5 pounds. I am really happy for you about your weight loss. Everytime I go to WDW I gain. You should be very proud of yourself and this should continue to motivate you-not that you aren't already. Three :cheer2: :cheer2: :cheer2: 's for your acheivements. You surely deserve it!! I look forward to reading your journal because you inspire me. :Pinkbounc

Take care,
Shannon princess:

[sarahsmom73]

Great job on your goals! Have a great weekend! :sunny:

[Blueeyes101817]

sounds like you had a great trip--congrats on meeting all your goals!!!!

[keenercam]

Wow. It has been so long since I have written here. I have been staying on plan and still exercising nearly every night at the YMCA. Doing some combination of upper body nautilus, recumbent bike, elliptical cross trainer and treadmill. I am thinking of learning how to do the stairclimber as I bet that is a good workout for my trouble areas -- hips & thighs. Took the plunge last night and bought a "FIRM" set at Target -- It comes with the stick that can be used as dumbells, weight bar or balancing stick and 3 DVDs, including the cardio blast that I have been hearing so much about.

I am worried that if I start working out at home with some videos, that I will lose the momentum of going to the Y and putting in the miles there. I also really enjoy tracking the miles, as well as minutes, so I will be unhappy losing that. I am going to have to work to find a good balance.

I am kind of surprised when I think about how much I have changed over the past few months, not physically, but mentally. It's interesting that I really don't obsess about food any more, when all my life I have lived to eat. I am not sure what the turning point was. I really feel that all my prayers were answered with my successful surgery and now it is time for me to take responsibility for getting healthy. I sooo look forward to exercising now, and even when I don't feel like going, knowing how satisfying it is to do that is enough to get me to go. Howard has been so supportive, too, going to the gym with me every night that he is available, and not even blinking when I try to squeeze in a workout on other, busy nights.

I do feel, sometimes, like I am being selfish. I just don't know how long I will have this passion for this goal, though, and feel as if I should stick to this for as long as I am enthusiastic about it. With my Dad being so very ill, I know the time is not far off when I will have more significant family obligations to be with him in his final days and then to help my Mom with arrangements and with picking up the pieces when he is gone. I know that even now, if he were cognizant enough to see what I have accomplished so far, he would compliment me on "looking nice" and I know he would brag to everyone who would listen about me walking a half-marathon. So, I am glad to be doing what I can now for me, before I have to "do" for everyone else.

Next objective is a better time on this 5K Saturday than the last one I did on 3/19 which was 51:42.

[plutosmyfav]

Cam,
You are doing fantastic. You are going to hold this passion for life! I'm sure there will be ups and downs, but you have changed and this new lifestyle is really your lifestyle now.

As for exercise tapes, I have a whole library. I have the Firm 3-in-1 with the box which I don't used very often but turns out that's the one my DD uses all the time. When I do home videos I always turn to TaeBo. I love working out with Billy :). But for me, they are more of a backup plan than my main exercise. I wouldn't skip the gym to go home and do a video unless I had to for some other reason. I don't think you'll give up your Y time since you are counting Disney miles, that'll keep you motivated to keep going::yes::

Keep up the great work. I feel guilty sometimes, too, about how much time I invest in my exercise and fitness goals. But I have come to look at it as a medical condition that I must care for. If we don't take care of our health and fitness we won't be able to care for those we love. Don't feel guilty!

Have a great day :)
Sunny

[sharoncity]

Cam - I feel like I am so much better for my family when I take the time to take care of myself. By exercising and losing weight, I feel better about me and who I am. And that gets reflected to everyone around me. Not to mention the wonderful example you are giving your kids to get up and get moving, to take good care of themselves. Don't belittle how good all of this is for you. I know it is hard for women to take the time for themselves, but ultimately you will be a better person for having done this for yourself. :goodvibes

Keep up the excellent work - you are doing wonderful!! :cheer2:

TTFN- Sharon :sunny: :3dglasses

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

It sounds like you have truly made a lifestyle change. You are doing an incredible job. I understand what you mean about feeling guilty. I do too, but I also know that I am a better wife and mother now that I am healthier. As for you commitment to your family, exercise is a great stress reliever. You may find that you NEED to workout to help you get through the coming ordeal.

Keep up the great work Cam,
Beth

[Blueeyes101817]

u are doing so great cam!! !!!

[pettyone]

Cam--

Where are you?? Please stop in and let us know how you're doing!!

I know that you said that your father really wasn't doing well at all this week...he is in my prayers...

:grouphug:

[keenercam]

Hi, everyone. Thanks for your concern. I am barely home these days, spending all my time at my father's bedside -- he is home with hospice and hasn't been conscious since Sunday. Am glad to be there with him in his final days. Hard to think about anything else, though. Hoping to be back here and on track and in touch with all my WISH friends soon. Am praying for a peaceful passing soon. There isn't much left of my dad in that bed, though I hold his hand and his his forehead and tell him I love him again and again. Feel terrible that he is in pain and I make sure he has his morphine every three hours -- it's all I can do for him now. My mother and I have a very difficult relationship and she has no friends to lean on, and unfortunately is not on good terms with my brothers or any of her own family. The situation is difficult and I pray for patience to be kind to her. Please keep us in your prayers.
Much love.

[plutosmyfav]

Hi Cam :grouphug:

You and your family are in my prayers.

Sunny

[DisnyMama]

Cam, My thoughts and prayers and love are with you and your family now and will be every day. Everything you have done for yourself over the past few months is really going to pay off at this time. It will give you the strength you didn't know you had before.

God Bless you and your Dad,
Shannon

[sarahsmom73]

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Take care Cam! We're here for you!

[Blueeyes101817]

hugs and prayers cam

[keenercam]

Thank you, my dear friends, for your support and your prayers. My Dad passed away very peacefully on Thursday, April 14 and was buried on Saturday. I'm still not sure that it has hit me because I am just kind of tired and worn out. DH and my kids have been so wonderful and our very strong faith in a peaceful and painless eternity in heaven has provided tremendous comfort to all of us. I am glad I was able to be with my dad for the last week of his life and that he knew at least some of the time, that I was there. I think there are many more difficult days to come because I am not sure my mother will take care of herself. She and my dad were together 46 years, having met when she was 17 -- existing without him is just unconceivable to her.

I am praying for strength to do what I have to do. And one of the things I really have to do is get back to exercising. I really need that outlet. I did really well with my WW points until after the funeral on Saturday when I wasn't careful about what I was eating. Once I catch up my points tracker I will figure out whether I have to start my "cheat free days" counter back at 0. Right now I am going to bring it current through Friday and see how close I got to 100. Pathetic that it is that important to me. I will definitely feel in control of my life again after I go to the gym tonight.

Thanks again for your prayers and support.

[panthergirl]

Hi Cam,

It's your pal from the Marathon thread. I just wanted to let you know how sorry I am about your dad. I am a few more weeks into the process and just wanted you to know I definitely know how you are feeling. Just know that you will have your good days and bad. Allow yourself to feel whatever is going on in the moment and you will get through it. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your mom.

Susan

[keenercam]

Hi, Susan -- Thank you so much for your support. Even today, I am sitting here thinking "This really hasn't hit me yet. I can't imagine what Father's Day will be like." I have a beautiful Faberge style porcelain egg on a stand that opens to reveal a rose and the base says "My Daugher, My Joy" -- It is from my Dad this past Christmas and having it in my office to look at all the time really reminds me of the warmth of his love and pride and approval.

Well, I went back to the gym last night and though I didn't do as much as I normally would, it felt good to be there. Lots of time to think and to listen to music, which I find so relaxing. I have been eating pretty well, and hit 20 pounds lost on WISH, with another 11.5 before that, according to my WW records. So, officially, I am at 31.5 pounds lost, with 20 of it attributable to my WISH commitment and the support I find here.

Looking forward to the 5K walk Thursday night. Will really have to invest a nearly impossible amount of time the rest of the month to make my 1200 minutes of exercise goal, but will have no problem meeting my 120 miles. I am also only 1/2 pound away from my "5 in April" goal and hope to do better than that. My Goddaughter's First Holy Communion is in a week and a half -- I am hoping I will have nothing that fits and will have to buy something new. :)

I really liked the music in the movie "Ice Princess". Two of the songs really hit me and one of them says falling down is okay, because it means you actually were up and trying. I like that a lot. I am going to put the lyrics here to inspire me and then I am going to go find a place to leave them for my WISH friend Liz who did her first walk last weekend.

I'm not afraid to fall
It means I climbed up high
To fall is not to fail
You fail when you don't try
I'm not afraid to fall
I might just learn to fly
And I will spread these wings of mine.

CHORUS:
If I get up, I might fall back down again
So let's get up, c'mon
If I get up, I might fall back down again
We get up anyway
If I get up, I might fall back down again
So let's get up, c'mon
If I get up, I might fall back down again
And I might fall back down again
And we'll just jump and see
Even if it's the twentieth time
We'll just jump and see if we can fly.

I'm not afraid to fall
And here I told you so
Don't want to rock the boat
But I just had to know
Just a greener side
Or can I touch the sky
But either way I will have tried.

If I get up, I might fall back down again
So let's get up, c'mon
If I get up, I might fall back down again
We get up anyway
If I get up, I might fall back down again
So let's get up, c'mon
If I get up, I might fall back down again
And I might fall back down again
And we'll just jump and see
Even if it's the thirtieth time
We'll just jump and see if we can fly.

I'm not afraid to fall
I've fallen many times
They laughed when I fell down
But I dared to climb
I'm not afraid to fall
I know I'll fall again
But I can win this in the end.

If I get up, I might fall back down again
So let's get up, c'mon
If I get up, I might fall back down again
We get up anyway
If I get up, I might fall back down again
So let's get up, c'mon
If I get up, I might fall back down again
And I might fall back down again
And well, just jump and see
Even if it's the fortieth time
We'll just jump and see if we can fly.

[keenercam]

UGH! Sitting in my office at nearly 7pm with no end in sight and definitely no prospect of going to the gym. Hoping I will be able to get out of here tomorrow night in time to go to my 5K, but that prospect is looking kind of bleak. I am going to hope for the best.

Interestingly, I am finding it is not hard at all to stick to my WW points, though I have always been disgusted or perturbed in the past when I heard people say that -- it just seemed so unlikely. And yet, except for my splurges, I seem to have established a routine of eating few enough points for breakfast and lunch that when I get home from work or the gym in the evening, I can always have a treat. I have completely abandoned that whole no eating after 7 thing -- it just doesn't work with my schedule.

I think I have some WW hot pockets in the freezer here, and will probably eat those for dinner just so I don't have to wait until I get home for something of substance.

Will miss my workout tonight.

[DisnyMama]

Hi Cam,

I am so glad that you were able to be with your father at the end. Please be good to yourself and let your DH and family help anyway they can. My computer will be in storage for at least a month or so since I sold my house and we will be moving out this weekend and since we have not found a place to live yet I am not sure where we are going to be staying but I will find a way to check in and see how things are going.

Take care of yourself and I will keep you and your dad in my prayers.
Shannon :flower:

[plutosmyfav]

Hi Cam,

Those lyrics are beautiful and inspiring. Thanks for sharing them :)

I hope your work schedule lets up and you can make it to your 5K. I'm glad to hear your points are working out for you. I still struggle BIG time with keeping my food within my points allowance.

Sunny

[keenercam]

Shannon -- I am so sorry you have so much uncertainty in your life right now. First of all, I hope you find somewhere to live really soon. If you lived near here, I could at least offer you and yours a place to stay. Secondly, I would freak out without my computer and the support of my WISH friends. Be assured we will all have you in our thoughts and prayers.

Sunny -- As it turns out, I never got out of here last night until after 9, so I missed the 5K walk. I am really disappointed. The only good thing is that my walking buddy hadn't been able to commit to it so at least I didn't let her down. I was starving by the time I got home though, so I steamed veggies and munched on them while on the phone with my mother and didn't eat real dinner until around 11, when I had two not so healthy (but, thankfully, still within my points) breaded chicken patties.

Tonight is a huge fundraiser dinner dance for my son's school, at a country club. I have no idea what they are serving for dinner, but I am going to hoarde my points all day so I can eat whatever it is. I still have most of my flex points too, so I should be okay. It's interesting that even with my severe lack of exercise, I am still seeing small movements on the scale. Good to know those muscles I was working on building are burning some calories.

Very excited to have gotten into a pair of pants this morning for work that haven't fit in more than 2 years. Certainly opens more wardrobe choices for me. It was scary when the largest size I had in my closet (3 sizes bigger than this) had gotten tight.

My big challenge this weekend will be to find time to workout. I don't want to get out of the habit. I am also looking forward to trying the FIRM workout stuff I bought the first week of April but haven't found time to take out of the box.

Need to get to bed earlier, too, so I don't get run down. Recent bloodwork showed a high white blood cell count, so I did a course of cipro and have to have the bloodwork done again in a week or so. Hopefully it is nothing significant.

[keenercam]

It's all too easy to just let things go. A strange lethargy seems to have overcome me last week, and though I stayed on points and went to the gym a few times, the enthusiasm and desire were gone. Instead it was just a matter of routine and knowing I HAD to stay on top of what I was eating and try to get some exercise. So, even while DH was away over the weekend retrieving our dog from my in-laws' house, I forced myself to go to the gym both days and watched what I ate when DD and I went to dinner with a friend Saturday night. Skipped the gym Monday and Tuesday of this week, but went last night. Even ran a bit. Not much. After 5 minutes walking on the treadmill, I ran for one minute, walked for two, ran for one, walked for two and ran for one, and then walked the rest. Did find that once I finished running the minute, walking at a much faster pace for the next 2 minutes was much easier. Doing it that way, I was able to do a mile in 16:09 -- still working toward a 15 minute pace for the half-marathon, though, and it doesn't seem too far off. I think next time, I will separate out my warm-up walking, and re-set the treadmill when I am ready to alternately walk and run, so that I can see what kind of pace that yields.
Only a couple pounds away from my first significant weight goal, and I will see my daily points allowance decrease by 2. I still haven't had any weeks where I used all my activity points and all my flex points, so, although it may be foolish to NOT be initimidated at the prospect, I think it should be okay.
Biggest challenge is still nighttime eating -- even if I eat a late dinner, I find that right before bed, I want some fat free pringles and pretzel goldfish or a no pudge or weight watchers ice cream. So, again, I am staying within my points, but this is definitely not smart and not a good habit. Something to work on for sure.

[mking624]

I totally can relate to that lethargy. I was going through that for a couple of weeks...started out with it just being a hectic week, then I was out of town and didn't have much time to do anything there...so when I came back home, it was hard to get back into the swing of things. I had to force myself to start back up this past Sunday.

And I hear you on that late night eating. I have to make sure I get my last snack in by 8 or 9pm...because I get so tempted to eat more if I have my snack later than that. But I'm cheering you on hon...I know you can do it!!! :wizard:

[keenercam]

Thanks, Mary. I'm glad someone understands. I bet you felt really great when you got back into the swing of things, right?

DH kept saying tonight, "it's really late. are you sure you want to go to the gym?" it would have been so easy to blow it off, but I know there won't be time to workout the next three days since we will be with DD most of the weekend at championships and meeting with the contractors Saturday afternoon. Glad we went. I finally walked and jogged 2 miles in less than 32 minutes! That is the pace I will have to beat for the 1/2 marathon. I also practiced walking at a 15:00 mile pace, which is very hard for me becuase of my unusually short legs. That felt so great. Also did 4 miles on the stationary bike in 11 minutes. Not a long workout, but better than none. Ate all my daily points and 3 out of 4 APs, too. Oh, well, That is what they are there for. May be hard to stay on plan for parts of this weekend with a First Holy Communion party for my Goddaughter, but planning ahead for it gives me a better chance of success.

[Blueeyes101817]

hi!! just catching up on journals since ive been gone for awhile--hope you are having a great weekend

[mking624]

Thanks, Mary. I'm glad someone understands. I bet you felt really great when you got back into the swing of things, right?

DH kept saying tonight, "it's really late. are you sure you want to go to the gym?" it would have been so easy to blow it off, but I know there won't be time to workout the next three days since we will be with DD most of the weekend at championships and meeting with the contractors Saturday afternoon. Glad we went. I finally walked and jogged 2 miles in less than 32 minutes! That is the pace I will have to beat for the 1/2 marathon. I also practiced walking at a 15:00 mile pace, which is very hard for me becuase of my unusually short legs. That felt so great. Also did 4 miles on the stationary bike in 11 minutes. Not a long workout, but better than none. Ate all my daily points and 3 out of 4 APs, too. Oh, well, That is what they are there for. May be hard to stay on plan for parts of this weekend with a First Holy Communion party for my Goddaughter, but planning ahead for it gives me a better chance of success.

Oh yeah, I felt much better when I got back into the swing of things. Not just physically, but mentally as well!

I'm so proud of you for getting back into gear and giong to the gym!! You're right, a short workout is better than none at all!!

[sharoncity]

Hi Cam! :wave:

How are you doing this morning after your busy weekend? It is so diificult to stay OP at this time of year because of everything going on. I hope you were able to squeeze in a workout over the weekend! :cool1: You are doing so amazingly well with that! Kudos to you!! :banana:

Hope this week is a little less stressful for you. Sending :wizard: and :goodvibes for a good week!

TTFN- Sharon :sunny:

[keenercam]

I don't even know where to start. I am trying to get my life back on track. I really feel as if I haven't even begun to grieve for my Dad. Everything reminds me of him. My mother's death just 17 days later on May 1 has really rocked our lives. I had been so worried about whether she could go on without my Dad and worried that with her serious illnesses over the past many years, that she just would not have the physical or emotional strength to carry on. I am glad we were with her on that Saturday, even if it was just for a few hours, and that she got to see her granddaughter (my Goddaughter's) first holy communion. I have some wonderful pictures of us together that day. When I feel like I can face it all the time, I will bring one of those pictures to my office, to remind me to focus on the memories rather than my grief.
The week of her viewings and funeral were so haphazard and overwhelming with a house full of people and absolutely no desire to eat, much less eat right. When I did eat, it was what DH called comfort foods, chinese, carbs, and even a malted milk shake. And of course, no exercise. Monday of this week I should have gotten back to the gym, but just going back to work seemed exertion enough. Last night I spent nearly an hour on the phone with a neighbor and was so wrung out afterwards that I couldn't even think about going to the gym. My "FIRM" set that I bought in early April still sits in my basement in a box. I ate fine yesterday -- the first day of my WW week and am doing okay today. If I can get myself to go the gym tonight, it will really mean I am focusing again. So, that is my goal for today. Just eat right and go to the gym tonight, even if it is only for 1/2 an hour.

[sharoncity]

My heartfelt sympathies and prayers are with you Cam!!! :grouphug: I pray God will comfort your heart in this terrible, terrible time of loss.

Please be gentle with yourself Cam. There is so much you will have to deal with over the next few months. Be easy on yourself and take it one day at a time. Your friends here at the DIS will be here to offer you comfort and support.

Again, I am so sorry for your double loss. Please feel my :goodvibes that I am sending you. I hope today is a little bit better for you.

TTFN- Sharon :grouphug:

[sharoncity]

Cam- Just want you to know I am thinking of you and praying for you and your family. I hope you are doing okay and taking good care of yourself! :hug: and healing :wizard: for your heart!

I hope today is a good day for you!

TTFN- Sharon :sunny:

[Blueeyes101817]

cam-- i am so sorry i have not bee naroudn for awhile--i hope you are doing okay..prayers are headed your way..

[keenercam]

Thanks Jen and Sharon. I really appreciate your good wishes. I think I am getting back on track.
Glad to have gotten back to the gym last week 3 times. Was pleased to jog a bit last night and did 3.1 miles in 48:54, which puts me at a pace of 15 minutes 44 seconds. I was completely wiped out afterwards and was dripping sweat, but that is kind of reassuring -- means I was working hard, right? I read that you should exercise vigorously enough to work up a sweat at least 2x/week. Well, thank God I managed the first one on Sunday -- only one more of those to do and now through Thursday night to do it. :)
Another busy week with appointments tonight and Wednesday night and DD16's scholastic awards program tomorrow night, and leaving Friday night to drive 2 hours for DH's 5 mile race Saturday. Hopefully, next year I may be able to do that one with him.
Finding I actually crave walk/jog time. Here I am at nearly 42 years old, finding this new interest in something I never would have dreamed of.
Have lost 30+ pounds since January 7th and 20+ since I started WISH on 1/17/05. Long way to go, but still motivated. Having the 1/2 to work towards is definitely keeping me motivated. I guess the "training to train" phase will end in July or August and I will have to actually start training. Quite intimidating, but determined to whittle my jog/walk time down to a consistent 12-13 minute mile. Will work on endurance later.

[Blueeyes101817]

You are doing great losing all that weight and doing great on exercise!! im glad you are getting back into "the swing of things" have a great day!

[sharoncity]

Your doing great Cam!!! The exercise/training will give you time away from your troubles. Making time for yourself is still so important, so don't short change yourself there! :flower:
I am impressed with your exercise. I am no where near that point, but I will get there! Someday! :rotfl2:

Still sending you :goodvibes and big :grouphug: ! Take care!

Sharon :flower:

[keenercam]

Thank you, Jen & Sharon! What would I do without you guys and all my other WISH friends? :goodvibes

I wasn't well behaved yesterday food-wise and did not get to the gym to work out. DD16 won 2 very prestigious academic awards last night and we did, in fact, go out to celebrate with food! DH and I hadn't had dinner so I ordered a junior crab cake with rice pilaf and mashed cauliflower and the kids ordered junior nachos. Then both kids ordered dessert and I was eating DD's whipped cream. :guilty: Overall, though, I was pretty disciplined. Had one of DH's onion rings and a couple of nachos (just to put the jalapenos on), so I shouldn't have felt too bad. Can't imagine what made me go home and eat a candy bar that has been on my dresser since March and which I had been taking pride in resisting every single day and evening. UGH! Now it is gone.

Going to the gym tonight and tomorrow night. Without fail. Wish I had the discipline to get up early in the morning to go to the Y before work. Then I could get 2 workouts in each day. Am finding that I completely wipe myself out on the treadmill doing the walk/jog thing and then don't want to do anything else. So, the plan for tonight is to do the recumbent bike for 30 minutes while reading a book, and then get serious on the treadmill for 32 minutes (or however short a time I can get two miles done in)

The other thing I really have to do is pay attention to what I eat and how I feel afterwards. Sometimes I am so lethargic after eating and have not taken the time to figure out if it is due to the quantity or the type of food I am eating.

Today's meals so far:
B: small bagel w/tiniest bit of cream cheese (5); fit n fiber yogurt w/granola (3)
L: greek salad of lettuce (0), fat free feta cheese (2), and kalamata olives (2)
(S): nature valley chewy fruit and nut granola bar (3)

I will try to remember to do 2 light string cheeses in the car tonight -- one on the way to my hair appt and on the way to the Y. Those small protein fixes should hold me until after I exercise. Will probably get home and look for dinner around 9:30. Pathetic, I know, but it is the way my routine goes right now. The most I can do is to eat something healthy when I get home that late, low fat, high protein -- maybe some chicken or maybe I will make spaghetti squash.

Just spoke with DD who is working on one of 3 "finals" essays for English class. This one is on "My Grandparents" -- poor kid. I asked her if it is hard and she said "Yes, very." and got all choked up. Didn't even know what to say to her, just that I am sorry this is making her sad. My parents would have been so proud of her last night. I had to work on NOT falling apart and NOT thinking of them, so that her joy and pride wouldn't be overcome with sorrow. There is nothing I can do to lessen her pain and grief. Heck, I can't even help myself at this point. I guess the feelings will become a little less overwhelming in time.

DH's race is Saturday. I am actually anticipating that I am going to wish I were running it! I should make it my goal to run it next year. I'll need another goal after the Disney 1/2, so maybe the next thing would be to run a 5 miler. I am actually thinking I may be able to run a 5K this fall. Sounds outrageous, but wouldn't that be something? I would do it just for the pride I think it would bring my kids and my husband.

[Blueeyes101817]

Glad you are doing better :) congrats to your son for getting awards--that deserves a celebration!!!! hope your day tomorrow is good as well

[keenercam]

Did most of what I wanted to accomplish at the gym. 10 miles on the bike in 29 minutes and 2 miles on the TM, though the time was a bit slow there -- 33:10. UGH! Was also having some shin splints, so I am going to have to re-evaluate stretching, etc.
Dinner was delicious -- egg beaters w/salsa & ff cheese on 2 slices light rye, with 6 small turkey breakfast sausage -- all for 6 points. Still have points left for ice cream, though I am too stuffed.
Wish I had the energy and ambition to get up for the gym early in the a.m. -- maybe someday. :)

[contempgal]

Hi Cam! Thank you for stopping by my journal. It helps dramatically to have support from those who know what I'm going through.

I've been reading slowly through your journal. I'm so sorry for your loss....I know that those words can't help the pain but I hope they do at least let you know that we all feel for you. :grouphug:

On a brighter note.........your story is amazing to me. What a miracle your surgery was and how great it is that you've committed to this new initiative in your life (well, I guess it's not really that new at this point). You are doing wonderfully! :banana:

Just wanted to let you know how happy I am for you! You are an inspiration.

[keenercam]

Thank you so much, Amanda! How sweet of you to stop by and encourage me. BTW, I LOVE that you are walking to the Contemporary. Maybe when you get there we can look at what there is to eat at Chef Mickey's. I know the last time I was there they had great fruit and some awesome blanched green beans. YUMMY!


Well, so much for being an inspiration for anyone! I went nutso after lunch eating snacky foods. You definitely SHOULD NOT go shopping when you are hungry. I ran to the store at lunchtime and bought sugar free gum, pretzel goldfish, flavored water, pretzels and fat free sour cream and onion pringles. So, what did I do? I ate goldfish while my lunch was cooking and then ate more FF pringles and pretzel goldfish after I had eaten a satisfying LC meal. UGH! Wonder how long I will have to exercise tonight to earn APs to cover those 5 points worth of snacks?!?! Have switched to sugarless gum now to satisfy my cravings.

Okay. Here is the plan for tonight. Leave work and go right to the gym and get in my last normal workout before a crazy busy weekend. Stop at Acme on the way home to buy bags of salad for dinner tonight and lunch and dinner tomorrow. Go home and cook some chicken breast to use up for meals tonight and tomorrow.

Next week I am going to start the Couch to 5K program to see if I can get myself to a point where I could run a 5K late this summer. It seems so outrageously ambitious and totally foreign to me to have that kind of aspiration, and I am not even sure where this desire is coming from, but I am grateful for it.

I had won a bunch of clothes auctions on ebay for clothes that are several sizes smaller than I was wearing in January, and I realized this morning that I have to go ahead and have them shortened to wear now, since most of my clothes look ridiculous. While I would love for everyone to comment on the fact that my clothes are too big for me, I know I would enjoy it even more if I was wearing clothes that fit and show off the efforts I have been going to.

So, what else should I/could I be doing?

I feel very restless about going on with normal life when I feel like I could devote all my time to this effort.

Here are all the things I'd do if I had time (and didn't have to work for a living):

1. Clean out my closets and drawers to remove clothes that are too big
2. List really good work clothes and nice casual clothes on ebay
3. Donate stuff to women's shelter
4. Reorganize my closet and put off-season clothes away
5. Clean out kitchen cupboards and get rid of all non-WW friendly food that my kids won't eat
6. Bake some low fat/low cal muffins and scones
7. Make SF jello and SF pudding
8. Go to the gym whenever I want, for as long as I want
9. Walk around in workout clothes so that I can do some situps if I feel like it or finally get to my "FIRM" tapes
10. Open the "FIRM" workout set I bough in April that still sits in the sealed box in my basement.
11. Look through some recipes and plan some meals and the grocery lists for ingredients.
12. Invite friends and family over for a great meal that is all WW friendly, unbeknownst to them!
13. Go through my books and either sell them or donate them to buy new ones.


Oh, well, a girl can dream!

[joelyfaithsmommy]

YOU SOUND LIKE ME! :rotfl:

I've got a list of things longer than that I would do if I didn't have to work, and only had the time! :confused3

OH WELL, LIFE GOES ON! :teeth:

Jen :cool1:

[Strings]

Cam,

I have almost the extact list on my fridge.

Listen, one afternoon of snacking does not destroy all the hard work you have put in. You ARE an inspiration, and please don't forget it.

It is very frustrating when real life interferes with what we want to do. Do the best you can with what time you do have. That is all you can ask of yourself.

Take care,
Beth

[keenercam]

Thanks, Jen and Beth -- I knew you guys would help me get past my "slippage" :)

Yesterday was marginally better in that I stayed well within my points and didn't even use any of the activity points I earned.

I did the first workout from Couch to 5K and it was a major effort. Here, I thought the plan would be so slow and drawn out and that I wouldn't have the patience for it, but I think every single workout is going to be a challenge, so that will keep it interesting.
Week 1 -- workout 1 was 5 minutes of brisk walking and then alternating 1 minute of running with 90 seconds of walking. The 90 second "recovery" time seemed generous at the beginning, but then got very "short" for the last 2 runs. But, only having to run a minute was enough of a mind game that I could convince myself to do it.
I put the plan in a chart for myself with the start and stop times on it (rather than the intervals or the miles), so that it would be easier to follow on the treadmill. I don't think I could do it outside because I would probably trip over something looking at my watch all the time.
Here is the first day that I did:
WALK to 5:00
JOG to 6:00
WALK to 7:30
JOG to 8:30
WALK to 10:00
JOG to 11:00
WALK to 12:30
JOG to 13:30
WALK to 15:00
JOG to 16:00
WALK to 17:30
JOG to 18:30
WALK to 20:00

I covered 1.26 miles. 15:52 minute mile pace. Did the walking at 3.5 mph and the jogging at 4.5 mph. Hope to eventually pick up to 3.7 and 4.7. Maybe by the end of next week.

[joelyfaithsmommy]

WOW, that's awesome! (I SO NEED TO GET A TREADMILL) :teeth:

You're doing great, back on track, ready to JIVE!!! Hang in there

YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!!! :goodvibes

Jen

[contempgal]

Wow Cam, that sounds awesome. I would love to run some but I'm not even close to a weight yet where I would feel comfortable doing it so I'm sticking to walking for now. You're right though, there's no way I could do that routine and look at a watch outside. I'd be on the ground in no time.

Keep up the great work! You are doing fabulously!!

[keenercam]

Trying to pay more attention to what I eat and how long it "holds me" and how it makes me feel.
Had a "power bagel" (multigrain with fruits & nuts & sunflower seeds) at about 8:30 and my stomach is absolutely growling at this point. I am going to step up the water intake and try to make it through to lunch, though I could eat an apple or banana that I have with me. I guess I shouldn't complain -- it's been 3 hours. A small snack would be understandable. Will try do do protein (eggbeaters & turkey sausage) one work morning next week, and see if that holds me any longer.
Am loving my Aquafina wildberry flavor splash (flavored water), though I think I will have to mix it with reguar water, because it is a little sweet. Should make drinking lots of water a bit more bearable.
having spaghetti squash mixed with fajita flavored chicken for lunch -- will melt some fat free cheese on top. Lots of quantity for 4.5 points. Should get me through to dinner.
Pigged out yesterday afternoon on fat free pringles and pretzel goldfish and will try to avoid doing that again today, though they seem to call my name. If I can get through the afternoon without cheating, I will have that as a late afternoon snack or will take some on our long car ride tonight. YUM.

[Blueeyes101817]

have a great weekend!!

[toystoryduo]

Hi there!

Thanks for stopping by my journal! I appreciate your kind words and support! :goodvibes

Have a great week! :flower:

[keenercam]

Well, it's been an interesting couple of days. We were away from Friday night through last night, and my food choices really ran the gamut.
I was good Friday night eating a turkey sandwich on whole wheat with only lettuce, tomato and sweet peppers.
Saturday I had a granola bar for breakfast and was starving by lunch -- ate 2 pieces of pizza, one with chicken parmesan on top and the other with buffalo chicken on top. Very bad! At dinner Saturday night, I wisely chose mussels for an appetizer and crab cake with mesclun salad for my entree. Of course, I also ate some fried calamari tossed in olive oil and 3 buffalo chicken wings. Having walked for an hour that day, I should probably have been pretty close on points.
Sunday was a disaster after a very healthy eggbeater & veggie omelette for breakfast. We went to a barbecue where I ate a cheeseburger and a piece of cheese & chicken sausage and all sorts of side dishes, including potato salad. Then, instead of sticking with fruit for dessert, I helped myself to the more decadent stuff. I am figuring I blew all my flexpoints for the week in that one day. UGH!!!
Yesterday I had grain & nut pancakes for breakfast, but we never really ate lunch or dinner. Instead, I was munching on mini pretzels on the drive home. Had one small piece of thin crust pizza for "dinner" at 9:30 last night. UGH! :guilty:
So, there were some good choices in there, but also some bad ones. I DID walk for a total of about an hour on Saturday while DH did his five mile race. And I did 20 minutes on a treadmill on Sunday and Monday mornings at my hotel. There were probably some APs in there somewhere Saturday and Monday also for walking around the outlets, shopping.

So, on to the good stuff. I am so happy that clothes I have bought recently are getting too big pretty fast, except for the "waste of money" factor. I bought two really nice, but full price pairs of Lauren pants on mother's day, which are now too big to wear, even when they come out of the dryer. I am really obsessing at this point about clothes. I am very surprised at the shape my body is taking as I exercise more and more. Even though I was not on plan this weekend, the scale was friendly this morning, showing another 2 pounds lost. :banana: :banana: And when we went to the POLO outlet yesterday, I bought a couple things in XL, that fit just fine. That is SOO exciting to me. Starting in tight 22Ws in January (and 24Ws before that) makes it even more meaningful to me to have my 18s bagging on me. I caught sight of my reflection walking past an office building this morning, and realized my legs are taking shape too, with slimmer calves. Hopefully, the 1/2 marathon training I am doing will continue to make a big difference there.

My significant issue at this point is flabby skin. I am mortified by how wobbly parts of my body are, now that the pounds are dropping. I obviously need to step up the exercise in a very focused way, but can't yet change my mindset. I am determined to do the "Couch to 5K" program, but am not sure I have the energy (or discipline) to do other types of exercise in addition to that. I am really going to have to focus on a plan of action and stick to it. I still have not opened my "FIRM" set I bought almost 2 months ago.

Maybe if I make a commitment here to get that out of the box tonight and check it out, you all will motivate me to be accountable.

UGH! Okay, here we go. I am making a commitment. Going to the gym on the way home to do the first official session of "Couch to 5K" then I am going to go home and open the FIRM box and check out at least one of the videos, even if I don't do the workout tonight. I know some people swear by this regimen, so I have to at least give it a shot.

Well, if you are still here, and have actually read all of this, thanks! Just having a place to come to, to vent, is such a miracle! :cloud9:

[toystoryduo]

Hi Cam!

Thanks for the encouragement in my journal! I soooo needed that! :grouphug:

What FIRM system do you have? I have been FIRMing for the past year and a half and I love it! My body is firming up (even though the scale isn't going down) and I have muscle! It's a great workout! I hope you get a chance to preview one of the videos tonight. Let us know what you think about it, okay?

Have a great day today! :sunny:

[Strings]

Hi Cam,

No one is perfect. You are back Op after this weekend. You also made some very good choices this weekend. Congrats on the loss. Also congratulations on your clothes being too big. I have a sugestion for you. Take the clothes that you love to tailor. I had 2 pairs of pants and a dress altered for $26. Just a thought.

Good luck with the Firm and Couch to 5k. You can do anything you set your mind to.

Keep up the good work.
Beth

[keenercam]

Thanks, Tracy and Beth! I can always count on you guys to keep me positive-minded!
Tracy -- I have the FIRM set that comes with three videos and the sculpting stick. I think one of the videos is cardioblast. I got it at Target for 39.99.

Beth -- I totally agree about the alterations. The pants were a huge splurge, because they looked so nice. I guess I shouldn't complain that they are too big. And I'm not. They are definitely worth the money to have taken in. I think I will wear them big a couple more weeks, in the hopes they will have to be taken in even more by then, since I am hoping the jogging will really kick up my weight loss and size decline.

I am still dumbfounded. I am the smallest size I have been since the fall of 1984, right before I got married, even though I weigh a bit more than I did then. I guess the exercise has just proportioned me differently. I can't wait until the FIRM gets my tummy smaller and, well, "firmer". :)

DH was so sweet this morning. He looked at me, grinned, and said "I LOVE what you are doing to your body!" He has always been so incredibly supportive regardless of my size and it never seemed to alter his perception of me or how attractive I was to him. But, I can tell my newfound confidence and my desire for better fitting clothes is a big positive with him. He thinks everything I put on now is cute or sexy. What a guy!

[joelyfaithsmommy]

Cam,

That is so AWESOME about your clothes getting too big! I'm soo soo happy for you...so you 'fell of the wagon' a bit this weekend...the important thing is that you're right back on it today....and pushing toward your next goal! Just keep going and those pounds will keep coming off!!! It's so great for you that you are shopping and getting XL that fit!!! I can't wait to do the same!!!

and I can't wait to hear what you think of THE FIRM, lmk, i need to get something too cause the lose skin will be a huge issue with me I'm sure!

huggies
Jen

[goldcupmom]

Almost half way! You're doing awesome - and big clothes are just one sign. Keep up the work and you'll be there MUCH sooner than you think!

I really admire you doing the 1/2 marathon training. I'd love to, but have absolutely NO support here at home, which would make it very difficult. I may get brave someday, tho!

[keenercam]

Well, yesterday was a good day, even if I did go into a panic last night when I finally got down to writing down all I had eaten. Geez, hadn't realized my first day of 2 less WW points was going to slam me that way. I am going to have to be conscientious all over again about planning meals ahead of time and making some choices about what I can and can't eat.

Yesterday:
B -- bagel with touch of cream cheese (6); coffee w/creamer (1)
L -- LC chicken with veggies (5); cucumbers & tomatoes (0); corn (1)
S -- fat free pringles & fat free pretzels (2)
D -- 2 pieces diet coke chicken (4); green beans (0); shells & white cheddar (1/4 of box made with no margarine) (3)
S -- pretzel goldfish (1); no pudge mint ice cream sandwich (3); diet coke w/light coconut rum (1)
Oh, yeah, also had powerade while exercising -- (2) -- what a kick, using activity points for powerade. ICK!!! :confused3

Exercise -- week 1, workout 1 of Couch to 5K -- 20 minutes (covered 1.27 miles); recumbent bike 20 minutes.

Did open all my FIRM tapes and started browsing. Quickly came to the conclusion that I will have to work very hard to keep up because I am just NOT that coordinated and while the steps are not difficult, they are very fast moving. Also, my set came with the sculpting stick but not the fanny lifter and every single one of the 3 tapes included in the package requires the fanny lifter. I am kind of disappointed because this really seems like a ploy to force you to buy the fanny lifter before you can really do the tapes. I may head to a sporting goods store tonight to see if they sell the fanny lifter. Otherwise, I will do the workouts on flat ground to start with. So, while I played the first couple minutes of each of 2 tapes, I just lifted the little weights and then the sculpting stick with the dumbbells attached while I sat on the couch. :rolleyes:

Plan for tonight is elliptical cross trainer for at least 20 minutes and recumbent bike for 30 minutes. I am not supposed to "run" at all, according to Couch to 5K, so I am seizing the opportunity to skip it with an excuse.

Already adapted my breakfast to a WW bagel with fat free cheese (2.5) instead of the 6 point choice yesterday morning. Will also stop after this one cup of coffee and switch completely to water.

[joelyfaithsmommy]

YAY CAM! :cool1:

I am only drinking water (mostly water), skim milk (on occasion) or crystal light (rarely)

WATER IS AWESOME! SO ARE YOU! KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK!

Jen :flower:

[keenercam]

Eating a very very low point lunch that is definitely NOT appealing enough. Lettuce tomatoes & cucumbers w/ff italian dressing; carrots w/ff ranch dressing; sf jello. Will go raid my food supply in the fridge and get some protein -- probably lite cheese sticks. May need a lite english muffin later with a slice of fat free cheese, especially if I am going to the gym from work. Otherwise I will be starving when I get home. I do have some sugar free chocolate pudding that I will have for a snack later with a couple of pretzels broken up in it.

water check -- 64 oz done..

[joelyfaithsmommy]

Just wanted to pop in and tell everyone reading this that CAM IS THE BOMB~~ she SOOOO helped and supported me today when I had a weakness....THANK YOU SO MUCH CAM!!! She's AWESOME!!!

Jen :)

[keenercam]

wow. I am touched. Glad to know I can do what we WISH buddies should be doing for each other. Wish I could be there for everyone all the time.

Just finished my SF black cherry jello. YUM! So, for the moment I am stuffed, and won't eat my carrots & dip until I feel hungry again.

[toystoryduo]

Hi Cam!

Just wanted to drop a quick note here about the FIRM. It sounds like you have Body Sculpting System 2. Does that sound right? I love that series! Please don't get discouraged about how quickly the steps go by. When you start, you'll want to start without weights and start slowly. Gradually, the workout will get easier and easier. It always takes me a few attempts before I can get through a FIRM tape. I usually preview it first and then try it without the weights. The great thing about all of the activity: it makes time go by soooo fast! There is a FIRM thread on the main WISH board if you want to check it out...

You are doing a fabulous job Cam! Thank you so much for your encouragement and support!

Have a great Thursday! :flower:

[keenercam]

Thanks, Tracy!
I didn't get to the store tonight to look for the fanny lifter or whatever that box thingie is, but I will, soon.
Thank you again for all your encouragement and positive feedback. It really makes a difference to me every day!
Have a great night!

[joelyfaithsmommy]

Hiya Cam...just checking in to see how your morning is going? What's on your agenda today? It's work for me :( but home soon enough :)

have a SUPER day!!

jen

[keenercam]

Should be a busy day, with a great workout planned tonight, that I am looking forward to. My buddies on the marathon training thread have given me hints on running technique and I am going to try to start incorporating them in my Couch25K training. Tonight is week 1 workout 2, still doing 5 minutes brisk walk warmup then alternating 60 seconds running (jogging for me) and 90 seconds walking up to 20 minutes total. Once I have done that 20 minutes, I will do the recumbent bike for 20 minutes and elliptical for 20 minutes.
Am looking forward to a quick trip to Barnes & Noble to look for more magazines to read at the gym.
Then off to Target to find the FIRM fanny lifter to see if I can try to incorporate some of those workouts into my morning (currently non-existent) workout routine! :rotfl: Also have to buy some storage containers to put some of my parents' things in our basement until I can bring myself to go through them. Bringing that stuff home to our house is very very difficult and I just am not up to dealing with it yet. But we have to get their house emptied as soon as possible and get it sold. This weekend will be consumed with packing and cleaning there. UGH! :guilty:

Today's meals:
B -- WW bagel w/1 sl ff cheese (2.5); bottle of lemon flavored water
L (with a friend) -- lettuce, tomato, cucumber & artichoke salad w/grilled chicken on top; diet coke mixed with sugar free lemonade (4 pts)
D (before leaving work for the gym) -- garlic & herb shrimp mixed with broccoli (cooked this last night for today's lunch but forgot my lunch date, so I will have it for dinner) (4 pts)

Leaves me lots of points for flexibility and of course, my no pudge mint ice cream sandwich (3). Still seem to need my mid-afternoon pretzels or ff sour cream & onion pringles.

[Strings]

Hey Cam,

Sounds like you had a great lunch. I understand what you mean about your arents stuff. It is hard to sort through those memories, and get rid of some of them. You will get plenty of exercise doing all that lifting and cleaning. Have a great workout tonight.
Beth

[keenercam]

Well, we didn't go where I thought we would for lunch, but I made good choices, anyway. Had iced water and diet coke w/lemon, and 1 small slice of rye bread (1), then a crab cake (3) on a multigrain crouton (2). I also had coffee and one small meringue macaroon cookie, that I am counting at a total of 2 points. 8 points for a very satisfying 2 hour lunch. Not bad. Am not going to beat myself up over any of it. And I still have plenty of points for dinner and dessert, especially since I will have APs also.

Work has been stressful this afternoon. Am looking forward to burning off some of the "bad stuff" at the gym.

[pearlieq]

especially since I will have APs also.


Your lunch sounds delicious! Glad you found something nice to have.

The bit about APs cracked me up. I guess you know you've been in Disney mode too long when all you can think is "why is she talking about Annual Passes? Are they at WDW? Does she live in Orlando?" It took me a good couple of minutes to figure out you meant activity points. :rotfl:

Hope you have a great evening!

[keenercam]

The bit about APs cracked me up. I guess you know you've been in Disney mode too long when all you can think is "why is she talking about Annual Passes? Are they at WDW? Does she live in Orlando?" It took me a good couple of minutes to figure out you meant activity points. :rotfl:


What a riot! That is exactly what I would have thought until recently! Brilliant minds think alike, right?

Well, I did an hour at the gym -- 20 minutes on the treadmill doing week 1 workout 2 of Couch25K and covered 1.31 miles which puts me at something less than a 15 1/2 minute mile pace. YEAH! Also did 20 minutes on elliptical trainer and 20 minutes on recumbent bike. Exhauste now, but in a good way.

Went to Target and bought hangers and storage containers. Then home to garlic & herb shrimp with broccoli, a couple leftover ribs, and a skinny cow mint ice cream sandwich. Still have APs left, but am heading to bed instead of eating.

Learning that no matter how low your points go on WW, as long as you are willing to work your butt off, you can give yourself a cushion with those "couldn't make it without them" APs.

Night all!

[joelyfaithsmommy]

what a GREAT DAY you had Cam...you ROCK sister! :)

just keep on keepin' on, right? :teeth:


i'm a drinking water fool today...trying to push this BLOATY feeling away :rolleyes:

AND PS: stop by gator's journal later and SEE WHAT HE DID!!! :teeth:

huggies,
Jen