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Peter Pirate
09-27-2003, 12:30 PM
Just back from a stay at the Polynesian Resort and I have to say that I am really disgusted with this place.

First of all was check in. We waited for 20 minutes in this dank, jungly smelling lobby, full of weird flowers and greenery...Yuck, only to be greeted by some greeter person giving us cheap shell leis that I guess were supposed to make us feel better about our exhaustive wait. Well, it didn't work and I told the check in girl just what I thought and do you know what she did? She kept smiling this idiotic, "It's a Small World" kind of smile while my face got redder and redder. After a few exchanges I asked to speak to a manager. The Manager was nice and gave us a complementary upgrade to Concierge...We deserved it, IMO!

Next was the transfer to the room...What a joke! They put you in this golf cart thingy and wheel around the resort like Mario Andretti! We darn near lost little Maggie on one turn...Luckily our leash was attached and we were able to pull her along until we could get the cart stopped! The Cast Member apologized profusly but had that same little Stepford Smile the girl at check in had...Weird.

Once at the room we noticed one of out Gucci bags was scratched severly in the transfer. I know Disney did it because it wasn't there when we left for the trip. I called the manager and told her. She listened and agreed to have a look at the bag and if it warranted would reimburse us. I think we deserved it.

Just after that we remembered that we forgot to tell the Manager of our harrowing golfcart experience. We called back and demanded a fruit basket. She said OK. I think we deserved it.

At this point we had a chance to inventory the room they had upgraded us to. Well, it was on Concierge level, but this room was a roach motel. No wonder they "comped" us. It was dark, in a campish sort of way, kind of like a beach resort or something. How tacky, if I wanted to go to Hawaii I would have! On the phone to the manager again and told her about the dark room, the AC was noisy and the sink had a drip. I asked if she'd subject her family to such poor treatment? Suprisingly she agreed and sent the bell staff over and moved us to a Suite! I think we deserved it.

After settleing in we went over and met the Concierge staff. Much to our displeasure these people acted like they didn't know who we were! Can you imagine my embarassment when I was addressed only as "Sir" and no mention of my name? Absurd treatment for VIP'S spending big bucks on Concierge! I immediately called the Manager and demanded that this particular CM be fired. The Manager said she'd be right over. True to her word she was and after sorting through the sordid story of 'he said, she said' the CM was dismissed. I felt vindicated and feel the other guests owe me a debt of gratitude for sending this uncouth urchin on her way. At the conclusion of this messy affair I suggested to the Manager that perhaps a comped meal was in order to sooth the sting of the unpleasantness and she imediately agreed. Comped dinner at 'Ohana.

We wen't to 'Ohana without reservations, knowing that Concierge guests of the hotel would certainly get priority. well, I was wrong again. By this time I'm wondering if Disney has any idea of what customer service is. Don't they know the guest is always right? Well, I told this foreign person working behind the desk that she'd better get me a table or trouble would ensue. Luckily the Manager happened by and took Lilo aside and told her who we were. We were seated immediately. Soon after the food came and while it was plentiful it was virtually all grilled. What's up with that. To add insult to injury this lame ukelele player/singer kept coming by singing these South Pacific songs that would curdle milk...Well, I'd had enough. We had to explain twice that this was a comped meal to the wait staff who just didn't get it...For their incompetence we taught them a little lesson by leaving the a .10 tip!

We checked out the next day and swear we'll never come back until Disney has a Four Seasons on site...

Just thought some of you might appreciate our little experience...

songbert
09-27-2003, 12:42 PM
but I'm sorry you had such a rough experience........

If i'm not mistaken, if you were "upgraded" to concierge that day, then how did you expect them to know who you were without any prior contact?

The Polynesian obviously didn't meet your standards.......

IMHO, Disney can only do so much, and you have to start with a happy frame of mind to be happy on vacation. I've never gone there expecting to "deserve" anything but a good time with my loving family, and haven't been disappointed yet.

Better luck with your Gucci luggage at the Four Seasons!

HappyMommy2
09-27-2003, 12:49 PM
Peter Pirate, you had me going there for a minute.
Thanks for the report; I'm sure people who work in customer service (as I did years ago) have encountered people no less demanding and downright selfish as you were ;) far too often.

Tinkbell
09-27-2003, 01:01 PM
;)

>>^..^<<
09-27-2003, 01:24 PM
Poor little Maggie, almost lost on the last turn... I really think you have grounds for a lawsuit.

>>^..^<<

AspiringCindy
09-27-2003, 01:53 PM
WHAT?!? They didn't give you a free day at the spa too?

Lisa3
09-27-2003, 02:13 PM
Someone please tell me this is a joke! I would have thrown you out not give you an upgrade (guess that's why I don't work in customer service).

Gucci Luggage - give me a break. I will have to be careful with my LL Bean Duffle Bags next month!;)

lizmc
09-27-2003, 02:17 PM
Tell me peter pirate , are you a younger pirate?
Perhaps an english major?
Interesting tale of sorrow, I enjoyed the detail , little Maggies leash, the brand of luggage , very creative , next time try to be a little bit less insulting to staff , as it became to repetitive.
I am sure you can be less redundunt and more creative on your next piece!!
Aloha....me hardy

Sammie
09-27-2003, 02:18 PM
Actually he is the joke, :) and not his trip. Sorry Peter could not resist.

For those that have not read Peter's reports before, he excels in sarcasm. Very good at it in fact. The only problem not everyone that reads the boards knows that and at times some things make it back to the mentioned resort with less than desirable consequences.

Maybe a disclaimer would be appropriate.

Peter Pirate
09-27-2003, 03:02 PM
Thanks for remembering Sammie, it's been quite awhile since my last trip.;)

lizmc, young pirate? Not me. An old father with an overactive imagination, warped sense of humor and obviously too much time on his hands!

I realize this wasn't one of the better ones but no one has mentioned my single favorite line yet (Little Maggie was #2)...

DISCLAIMER: Nahhhh...

>>^..^<<
09-27-2003, 03:05 PM
Originally posted by Peter Pirate


no one has mentioned my single favorite line yet (Little Maggie was #2)...



That has got to be the reference to Lilo being a foreigner?

>>^..^<<

CamColt
09-27-2003, 03:07 PM
Thats it! Im cancelling my Poly reservation. I do not want to be subjected to such horrible treatment on Christmas and my birthday.
Thanks for the warning. ;)

Planogirl
09-27-2003, 03:15 PM
You are a trip Mr Pirate. Nicely done. :teeth:

Peter Pirate
09-27-2003, 03:25 PM
Lilo is it! You win the kewpie doll! It's not as good as when grandma had to sleep on the couch in the WL lobby, but still ok...

Thanks PG...I think.;)

Emmaline Lola
09-27-2003, 03:29 PM
I had to re-read the first couple of sentences, because I couldn't believe it!

After working at the Swan and Dolphin for 6 years, I have SEEN and DEALT WITH guests with this attitude. The thing that shocked me the most was that he was actually sharing what a meanie-meanie guest he was with everyone here!

We only had one solution for guests like this:

"DUMPSTER DOUBLES"!!

Yep, a beautiful room with 2 double beds overlooking the dumpsters and loading dock for those "special early" wake-up calls!

Funny post!

CaipiraBob
09-27-2003, 04:17 PM
I thought Polynesian staff were subject to ritual suicide for such abject failure in the area of customer service! I mean, what's the Volcano at the big pool good for then anyways?

If they aren't, I suppose we owe our last waiter at Ohana a big apology. At least his next-of-kin. *sigh*

CaliforniaDreaming
09-27-2003, 05:56 PM
Peter, at first you had me going, then I saw your user name! ;) Thanks for another great laugh. :teeth:

Jeanny
09-27-2003, 06:49 PM
Geez, I only had to wait 5 minutes to check in. I too, should have been upgraded, and I didn't receive no stinking shell lei's, I should have been upgraded just for that alone!!!

momof3disneyholics
09-27-2003, 08:21 PM
Man, if they scratched your Gucci bag I wonder what they are going to do to my Walmart bags?! :confused: ;)

skiwee1
09-27-2003, 08:50 PM
ROFLMAO! Thanks Pete for another good post! I always enjoy your perfect summation of others complaints! LOL!

johnsonet
09-27-2003, 09:09 PM
ROFLMAO!! Love it. Knew something was up around the part about check-in and the leis...you're RIOT! :Pinkbounc :cool:

DrTomorrow
09-27-2003, 09:23 PM
Thanks, PP - "Lilo" did it for me!

WDW LifeLong Fan
09-27-2003, 10:32 PM
PP.....you have TOO much time on your hands!!!


Keep up the good work!:p

:bounce: :Pinkbounc :Pinkbounc :Pinkbounc

Peter Pirate
09-28-2003, 11:25 AM
Thanks folks! It's great to have obvious humor recognized. I posted yesterday on another thread inquiring about shipping things to WDW before a visit and I guess my joke just wasn't funny because it was ignored totally...And I thought it was at least a little funny!;)

cindyfan
09-28-2003, 11:56 AM
ROTFL!!!:Pinkbounc

We are due to check in to the Poly on Sat.....you really have me worried now............
We lost "Sally the 1st" off the golf cart thingy last trip!!!:eek:
She just rolled right into the lagoon!!!:eek:
I better head to Target for a leash so we don't lose Sally the 2nd!!

Thanks for the laugh!!!
Can't wait til Saturday!!!!!!!!!:Pinkbounc

Oliviaclare
09-28-2003, 09:12 PM
Wonderful job, Peter, and with great style, also!

CatOne
09-28-2003, 09:21 PM
Ah, dear Peter..not ignored, just waiting for the right moment. I was actaully wondering why you hadn't mentioned not receiving your piano at check-in and the obvious outrage it must have caused. I for one think it is ludicrious a man can ship himself home via plane but they won't allow you to ship a piano!!! What nerve! LOL!! Hoping to do the Poly next visit, I'll remember to hang on tight to dd....unless of course she is making me crazy and then.....hahahahaha (maniacal laughter ensues)


CatOne

Peter Pirate
10-01-2003, 01:16 PM
As long as I wsn't being ignored...Thanks.

Well, I'll seriously be making a trip to WDW later this month...Who knows what may come of that!:jester:

MinnieGi
10-01-2003, 04:16 PM
Peter Pirate glad to see you back! I've read other trip reports of yours too - so I knew I was in for a laugh when I saw your name. :jester:

A trip later this month you say - we'll then I'll look forward to that report as well.

DZNEEXPERT
10-01-2003, 05:17 PM
This has all better be a huge sarcastic joke. I'll just leave it at that. LOL

MAGICinMYHEART
10-01-2003, 07:39 PM
Loved your report (poor Maggie) and poor Songbert, Must have thought you had lost it. Can't wait to read your next trip report......Now I have to find the post about your piano.

pirate:

Peter Pirate
04-08-2005, 03:13 PM
Someone was looking for this...I swear!
pirate:

BONZO
04-08-2005, 05:41 PM
...that'll do for me!


So - where to next me hearty ?

TigrLvsPooh
04-08-2005, 06:18 PM
Great! LOL ;) Thanks for digging this up for me. ;) I could have sworn you had another too that talked about horror of watching Wishes from the Poly beach?? Might have it confused though. :)

Vivianne
04-08-2005, 06:22 PM
:teeth:

You are very creative!

nwdisgal
04-09-2005, 03:53 AM
Oh! Another one! Almost fooled me again. I give you credit for being able to dig these things out of the archives...You never mentioned running into Ukulele players doing rap. What about centipedes that crawled into your bed to keep warm and the gecko with his mating call scurrying along the railing of your lanai. Did the CM's greet you in Pidgin? Were you escorted to your room in a rusted out Trans Am, oxidized down to the primer? Better yet, a rusted out Datsun pick-up truck? Are you sure you stayed at the Poly? I'm not buying it Mr. pirate: ;)

cindyfan
04-09-2005, 11:50 AM
You guys are great!!!
I am sitting back remembering all the fun threads I have been part of over the last 5 1/2 years!!!
WOW..... :banana:

BTW....how is Maggie doing these days? Has she finally learned to hold on when those crazy drivers get behind the wheel at the Poly?

Wish I was going back to the Poly....but CSR will still be awesome!!

Ladyhawke10
05-04-2005, 01:47 AM
So are you planning a trip back yet? ;)

patrenoe
05-04-2005, 11:27 PM
Thanks for the laugh. Unfortunately, I have seen this type of behavior. :moped:

Buzz'sBetterHalf
08-03-2005, 09:28 PM
Thanks again!

Aalore
08-03-2005, 10:36 PM
That was funny and entertaining!

kerry34
08-03-2005, 10:54 PM
MOST EXCELLENT SENSE OF HUMOR!!! I have to say after starting reading this post, I nearly had an asthma attack. My DH just convinced me to switch to the POLY today for our trip at Christmas. I am telling you my heart almost stopped!! :faint:

BostonTink85
08-04-2005, 12:43 PM
OH MAN! that was great :rotfl: :rotfl2: :rotfl: :rotfl2: :rotfl:

You had me going for a minute, up until about the Gucci bag thing and I was like no way is this guy serious ! :rotfl:

tone.def
08-04-2005, 12:58 PM
Wow - that was hilarious!!!!

I was reading the trip report thinking to myself "no one can really be this mean and demanding???!!!"

Good job - now tell me, was Hawaii that bad and did you really only stay one night?

dolphin01
04-05-2006, 07:50 AM
Here's another :lmao: :rotfl:

tlcintheberry
04-05-2006, 08:20 AM
Some people are never satisfied and that sounds like you. You guys sound like my neighbor, always complaining and looking for the negative in things. What did you want???? I dont think a 20 min wait is all that bad and they did try to comp you every time you gripe and complain. I bet they could not wait to get you out of there. Sorry but that is my opinion. Are you ever satisfied with anything????

Buzz2001
04-05-2006, 08:46 AM
Some people are never satisfied and that sounds like you. You guys sound like my neighbor, always complaining and looking for the negative in things. What did you want???? I dont think a 20 min wait is all that bad and they did try to comp you every time you gripe and complain. I bet they could not wait to get you out of there. Sorry but that is my opinion. Are you ever satisfied with anything????You do realize this is a joke post, right? :rotfl2: :lmao: :rotfl:

Grumpy'n'Goofy
04-05-2006, 08:49 AM
:rotfl2:

ummh, it's sarcasm

eeyore45
04-05-2006, 08:55 AM
aairg pirate: How did I miss this?!! :rotfl: Thanks for bumping it up!!

And how was the view? I've heard you can see the fireworks, I cant believe you neglected to inform me of the views!!

:woohoo:
Keep 'em comin pirate:

johnvree
04-05-2006, 09:34 AM
You do realize this is a joke post, right? :rotfl2: :lmao: :rotfl:

What??? I've been refusing to go to WDW and going to Six Flags for the last three years, and this was a JOKE?

molly1206
04-05-2006, 09:38 AM
Are you for real? Is your last name Kennedy or Rockefeller? Give me a break.

TommyTutone
04-05-2006, 09:54 AM
Are you for real? Is your last name Kennedy or Rockefeller? Give me a break.

Wow, so a thread is brought back from the dead after two and a half years (and who thought that was a good idea in the first place?), and not only do you not detect the sarcasm in the OP, but you also fail to read any of the other 100 posts commenting on the fact that it was sarcasm? :rolleyes2

grimley1968
04-05-2006, 10:20 AM
People, people! A lot of misunderstandings could be cleared up so easily if you'd just attempt to read ALL of the posts in any given thread before rushing to attack the OP. If you'd done this, you could have saved yourself much embarassment. And they didn't even need to read 100 posts like the above poster mentioned. Read a mere 50-something posts, most of them just one or two sentences each, and you would have gotten the bigger picture. Although if a debate thread has 100 posts, you should try to read all of them before jumping in, because it's almost a guarantee some other schmuck 45 posts before you said the exact same thing you want to say now.

:lmao:

There's a lesson in this, right? :rotfl2:

molly1206
04-05-2006, 02:58 PM
I'm not a bit embarrassed by my post. I just don't have the time to sit here and read 54 posts, but obviousely some people do if they have the time to type a 5 paragraph joke.. Which is not the bit least funny.. quite dumb if you ask me.

TommyTutone
04-05-2006, 04:22 PM
I'm not a bit embarrassed by my post. I just don't have the time to sit here and read 54 posts, but obviousely some people do if they have the time to type a 5 paragraph joke.. Which is not the bit least funny.. quite dumb if you ask me.

Well, I certainly cannot speak for Grimley, but I for one certainly appreciate your well thought out reply as it added all sorts of value to the thread, especially when you don't waste time reading the replies and 'getting up to speed'. Aces! :thumbsup2

tlcintheberry
04-05-2006, 04:26 PM
You do realize this is a joke post, right? :rotfl2: :lmao: :rotfl:

Oops!!! Sorry, I tend to take things as they are and it seemed real. You know they do have people in the world like the complainers. My neighbor is one of them. Geez... I am so glad it is only a joke. I was getting upset with someone dissing WDW. lol

Dana49
04-05-2006, 06:14 PM
OMG, I love this thread. I loved it a few years ago and it's still good! Thanks for bringing it back. :rotfl2:

Alicnwondrln
04-05-2006, 06:19 PM
:lmao: :rotfl2: :lmao: :rotfl2:
toooo funny

PamNC
04-05-2006, 07:50 PM
Ya'll so crazy! I personally thought it was hilarious. I believed it for about 2 seconds...but it became obvious that it was a sarcastic joke.

In defense of some the others that didn't read all the replies...I have to admit I don't always read the replies before I post. It just depends on how much time I have.

PamNC

Luvamouse
04-05-2006, 08:06 PM
to read the whole 3 pages (phew! tired just thinking of it), you could at least read the OP. I think the dog falling off the golf cart, the continual upgrades, the CM firing and the Gucci luggage were dead giveaways. I for one thought it was hilarious given some of the posts I read here.

I am going to be searching for more of Peter Pirate's reviews right now. I needed a laugh and some people need to not take life so seriously. I mean, we are all infatuated with a giant rodent, right?

Congrats to those who could admit to having been sucked into the story. (tlcintheberry)

:rotfl2: :rotfl2: :rotfl2:

Jeanny
04-05-2006, 08:13 PM
I'm not a bit embarrassed by my post. I just don't have the time to sit here and read 54 posts, but obviousely some people do if they have the time to type a 5 paragraph joke.. Which is not the bit least funny.. quite dumb if you ask me.

then why did you even bother to open the thread???

molly1206
04-06-2006, 07:46 AM
oh the maturity of these posts.... Because its titled "Just back from Poly", and since I am going in 2 weeks, it kind of caught my attention. But then to read a 5 paragraph complaint had me all revved up and ticked off, I really didn't feel like reading the other 53 after it. There is your explanation.

chrissyc
04-06-2006, 09:26 AM
HAHAHAHA! Love these posts!

Jeanny
04-06-2006, 10:43 AM
oh the maturity of these posts.... Because its titled "Just back from Poly", and since I am going in 2 weeks, it kind of caught my attention. But then to read a 5 paragraph complaint had me all revved up and ticked off, I really didn't feel like reading the other 53 after it. There is your explanation.

You didn't HAVE to read all 53 posts.... you could tell just from the first page. Heck, I could tell just from the OP it was a joke.

Allison
04-06-2006, 11:06 AM
Some people are never satisfied and that sounds like you. You guys sound like my neighbor, always complaining and looking for the negative in things. What did you want???? I dont think a 20 min wait is all that bad and they did try to comp you every time you gripe and complain. I bet they could not wait to get you out of there. Sorry but that is my opinion. Are you ever satisfied with anything????

Here is some advice for you-lighten up and never only read the first post.

molly1206
04-06-2006, 01:08 PM
Okay..

Lilolvr
09-05-2006, 11:23 AM
needed a laugh. sounds like some of the recent return posts I've read. :rotfl2: :lmao: :rotfl:

helenm29
09-05-2006, 12:32 PM
O.K. I thought we'd seen it all in your last post but NOOOOOOOOO! You have a gift here...you should write for a living! :rotfl: :rotfl: Helen