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View Full Version : O/T but not really, ....


jelo
02-14-2012, 10:15 AM
I'm so upset!:sad1:

For two years I've been growing my hair out and it was mid-back length, with the intention of getting a perm so I would have long loose curls for our upcoming cruise..:rolleyes1

I had my hair app't on Saturday and at the salon where I go it's a differant person to perm that usually cuts my hair, I've never had him before..

So before he started he said that he needed to take a bit on length off the ends, already knowing that would probably be the case I was ok with it.

He had me stand up so he could do it, then sat me back down for my wash. Then he took me over to put in the rods.

After the perm was complete, my regular hairdresser gave me my style and I thought it looked a little short and I couldn't see any curls( I wear glasses)
I mentioned to her it looked like a perm that was 6 months old or so, and everyone at the front desk knew I wasn't too sure I liked it. The perm guy was called up and he said to give it a few days, wash it and it should bounce back to curls...:upsidedow And if I wasn't happy I should call him(he guarantees his work :rolleyes::rolleyes:) And he would make the layers a little shorter or re-perm.

Needless to say, I washed and used a diffuser with curl enhancing shampoo/cond. and mouse. It just looks like I slept with braids and took them out. There's some fullness, but no curl.

And the worst of it??? He took about 7 inches off, it's just at my shoulder!!:headache: My hair grows extremely slow, took two years to go from my shoulder to mid-back!!:eek:

So now he's going to want to cut more, which I don't want or re perm which I'm really scared about doing! My hair is fine, and I'm worried it will fall out then I'll look just gorgeous for this cruise!!:scared1:

I told him I wanted long loose curls like Taylor Swift-like...this is so far from what I had envisioned! He didn't listen to me at all, he had a bit of an ego and just did what he wanted....ugh!

Sorry everyone, I just had to vent to all my Dis-councellors who have helped my plan this trip for the last two years!!:grouphug:

Lainey321
02-14-2012, 10:22 AM
I hate when hairdressers have an attitude. It's your hair you know what you want.

I don't think I would re-perm right now. :hug:

AlexandNessa
02-14-2012, 10:30 AM
I feel your pain.

I have long hair, and it tool me FOREVER to find a hairdresser who understood that a half inch is a half inch. My stylist said that many hairdressers hate long hair because it takes longer to do. I only get mine trimmed every 10-15 weeks, just to keep my ends clean, and my stylist is ok with that. Many aren't.

So sorry not only you didn't get what you wanted, but now you seemingly have to live with it for a while. I would go back, but ask for a different perm person. I think you're more at risk for even shorter hair if you go back to the same guy. Personally, I wouldn't let that guy near my head again.

Good luck!

Gigi22
02-14-2012, 10:32 AM
I have fine hair too--whatever you do, don't reperm your hair at this point. It will get really damaged. I am afraid that you are pretty well stuck with what you've got right now for length, unless it is possible to put extensions in permed hair? I suggest you make an appmt. with your regular hairdresser--not ego boy--and find out what will be least damaging.

jdb in AZ
02-14-2012, 10:36 AM
Yeah, I wouldn't go back to him either. Since you have fine hair I'd be afraid of all those perm chemicals a 2nd time. You don't want frizz-fried!

bluejasmine
02-14-2012, 10:39 AM
I hate that! Dec 2010 I go to get a haircut with DD15 and DH, I had very long hair, I always had to stand to have it cut.

DD talked me into getting it cut and donating it to Locks of Love.. I asked how much they would need, they showed me where on my back my hair would end..

When she cut it, it was no where near where she had indicated in fact, it was over my shoulders!! I am still growing my hair back, I have fine hair as well, I wondered if I should get a perm like big chnky curls or spiral..

TnRobin
02-14-2012, 10:40 AM
Your stories bring up sooo many bad memories for me. I remember just before I was to fly out to California for my brothers graduation in the Navy, I went to have my hair done. I told the stylist that I was letting the layers grow out and to just make it neater. A few minutes later I see her lift my hair on the side and start to take the scissors to it. Before I could get out the word - NO LAYERS - SNIP. 1 year of work gone in a second.

That said, I know you will still look beautiful for your cruise. Talk to your favorite stylist and see what she thinks.

markuehl
02-14-2012, 10:42 AM
Sorry you did not get what you wanted but as a hairdresser i would have told you no perm will give you taylor swift curls wash a wear is really rare i believe she uses a rod style iron the kind with no clamp i would not recomend re perming due to damage and possibly over correcting like ending up with a big frizzy mess the good news though when you do curl it now it will be easier and last longer and for the record i really think it stinks he was not honest with you about how much hair he was cutting off i think if he had kept it longer he would have had to a spiral wrap and that is a long process if he didnt have time i am sure you would have rather rescheduled and kept your length.

jelo
02-14-2012, 10:49 AM
Sorry you did not get what you wanted but as a hairdresser i would have told you no perm will give you taylor swift curls wash a wear is really rare i believe she uses a rod style iron the kind with no clamp i would not recomend re perming due to damage and possibly over correcting like ending up with a big frizzy mess the good news though when you do curl it now it will be easier and last longer and for the record i really think it stinks he was not honest with you about how much hair he was cutting off i think if he had kept it longer he would have had to a spiral wrap and that is a long process if he didnt have time i am sure you would have rather rescheduled and kept your length.
Wow! I guess I'm not alone!
Thank you all!

Yes, I didn't think I'd get exactly like Tayor Swift, but something similar.....All thru the 80's my hair was wash and wear curls(anyone remember the 20 min. workout girls??) I loved it, wash, pic and go! I was sort of hoping for something a little less poodle like but close to it.

Had he told me he was going to cut that much off in the beginning, I would have said no...I would have kept the long straight hair. But I figured he was the "expert" :P

I am going to call back tomorrow when the boss is in, explain it to him. At best I'm hoping for the perm portion of my $$ back, I absolutely won't reperm or cut more.... sigh...

jelo
02-14-2012, 10:51 AM
Sorry you did not get what you wanted but as a hairdresser i would have told you no perm will give you taylor swift curls wash a wear is really rare i believe she uses a rod style iron the kind with no clamp i would not recomend re perming due to damage and possibly over correcting like ending up with a big frizzy mess the good news though when you do curl it now it will be easier and last longer and for the record i really think it stinks he was not honest with you about how much hair he was cutting off i think if he had kept it longer he would have had to a spiral wrap and that is a long process if he didnt have time i am sure you would have rather rescheduled and kept your length.
Wow! I guess I'm not alone!
Thank you all!

Yes, I didn't think I'd get exactly like Tayor Swift, but something similar..:rolleyes1...All thru the 80's my hair was wash and wear curls(anyone remember the 20 min. workout girls??:yay::yay:) I loved it, wash, pic and go! I was sort of hoping for something a little less poodle like but close to it.

Had he told me he was going to cut that much off in the beginning, I would have said no...I would have kept the long straight hair. But I figured he was the "expert" :sad1:

I am going to call back tomorrow when the boss is in, explain it to him. At best I'm hoping for the perm portion of my $$ back, I absolutely won't reperm or cut more.... sigh...

jetskigrl
02-14-2012, 10:52 AM
Oh no...I'm so sorry :( As soon as I read the part about not being able to see the curls, I felt bad. Perms are just the opposite. They look way too curly when they are first done and then relax after being washed a few times. I have very fine hair so my stylist has to use tiny rods to perm mine. I joke about being the only person that is happy to walk out of the salon looking like a poodle. But within a few days, those tiny curls have relaxed into big, loose ones. It sounds like that guy really did not know what he was doing. He either used the wrong solution, the wrong rods, or misunderstood what you wanted.

I agree with the others though that you should not have it permed again right now (I would fear it would damage your hair).

Using mousse and scrunching your hair may help with the body a bit more. And on a positive note, what perm there is in there should held retain any curls that you might add with a curling iron, etc.

markuehl
02-14-2012, 10:57 AM
I have another helpful hint if you want a perm your best bet is to find a older stylist who has been doing hair along time they are the ones who have the experience the younger ones dont have much experience when they want to school and most of their careers the perm was not very common flat ironing was like i am not very good at sets because when i started doing hair blow dry's were the way to go.

princessmom29
02-14-2012, 11:37 AM
Have you ever had it permed before? I have fine, straight hair and mine simply will not come out like you are describing from a perm, beleive me I have tried. It is imopssible. Perms simply do not take well, and this is often the case with fine hair. If I were to perm my hair, the results would be just want you described, and nothing short of cutting it really short would change that. It may be that your hair is just not suitable for the style you want.

jelo
02-14-2012, 12:05 PM
Have you ever had it permed before? I have fine, straight hair and mine simply will not come out like you are describing from a perm, beleive me I have tried. It is imopssible. Perms simply do not take well, and this is often the case with fine hair. If I were to perm my hair, the results would be just want you described, and nothing short of cutting it really short would change that. It may be that your hair is just not suitable for the style you want.
Yes, all thru the 80"s my hair was in a wash and go curl, my first perm was actually at two years old (my grandmother.....)
It is very curl resistant, but if the solution is left on for 30-40 min instead of 20....I think that's what they used to do, it's been awhile!

princessmom29
02-14-2012, 01:45 PM
Yes, all thru the 80"s my hair was in a wash and go curl, my first perm was actually at two years old (my grandmother.....)
It is very curl resistant, but if the solution is left on for 30-40 min instead of 20....I think that's what they used to do, it's been awhile!
Given enough time, I could get the 80's super curly perm to work too, but there was no in between. It was either poodle hair or no curl at all, and the poodle hair lasted less than half as long as it is supposed to before it fell out completely. I could just never get loose flowing curls. My hair isn't built for it.

jdb in AZ
02-14-2012, 02:06 PM
If you have a picture of how your hair looked in the 80's, take it to your stylist for show and tell.

CMJeanae
02-14-2012, 10:58 PM
No advice here (my hair's the opposite - already thick and curly around a face made for straight hair!) but lots of sympathy about the length. I can tell a hairstylist how short I want it, I can show them with my hand, I can bring a ruler and give them the exact inch, but it always winds up far shorter than I want. Worst was right before graduation - I went in knowing that I'd be happy with anything between my shoulder and my -ahem- "assets" in length. So I told her to cut it to my assets. Showed her. Showed her how much my hair shrinks when dry. Showed her on stretched out hair where to cut. Even with all that I left with hair above the shoulders. FIVE INCHES TOO SHORT!!! How does that happen?!? And don't get me started about high school when I wore it short and no stylist would believe me when I said I got cowlicks if they cut the right side too short. My high school years were spent with a hot iron and curlers permanently attached to tame those licks. Right now I've resigned myself to keeping my hair long and letting DH cut it when it's annoying. He does a far better job than anyone trained and that annoys me.

Good hairstylists who actually listen to me, where are you? How do I find you?

Alexander
02-15-2012, 05:51 AM
Personal question here, but do you have kids? I only ask because after I had my kids my hair changed dramatically. I always had pin-straight hair and now have a bit of curl in the back. Your hair may not be the same hair you had 25-30 years ago!

Also, if I let it get too long, the weight of my hair pulls it straight. I wonder if this is why he decided to cut so much off, so your own hair didn't pull it straight.:confused3

If you really want Taylor Swift hair, you probably would be best off setting it in hot rollers in the mornings. I work with a girl who does this and she has pretty, full curls all day long. Personally, I don't have the time for that!

jelo
02-15-2012, 07:57 AM
Personal question here, but do you have kids? I only ask because after I had my kids my hair changed dramatically. I always had pin-straight hair and now have a bit of curl in the back. Your hair may not be the same hair you had 25-30 years ago!

Also, if I let it get too long, the weight of my hair pulls it straight. I wonder if this is why he decided to cut so much off, so your own hair didn't pull it straight.:confused3

If you really want Taylor Swift hair, you probably would be best off setting it in hot rollers in the mornings. I work with a girl who does this and she has pretty, full curls all day long. Personally, I don't have the time for that!
I have heard of some womens hair changes after kids, I have two but my hair really is the same. Fine, but lots of it.

I don't think weight would be a big issue, as my hair is very fine and light and I keep it pulled back away from my face all day at work. Which I really cannot do now, as it's too short.

Believe me, I've tried everything to keep curl in my hair. I've slept with rollers, sock method, 425 degree curling irons, two brands of hot rollers and making hair app'ts for special evenings....none of it works. Within 1hr it's all out, so the last few years I've just kept a straight style.

I look good with curly hair, better than straight!! But I guess it's not to be....

jelo
02-15-2012, 08:01 AM
No advice here (my hair's the opposite - already thick and curly around a face made for straight hair!) but lots of sympathy about the length. I can tell a hairstylist how short I want it, I can show them with my hand, I can bring a ruler and give them the exact inch, but it always winds up far shorter than I want. Worst was right before graduation - I went in knowing that I'd be happy with anything between my shoulder and my -ahem- "assets" in length. So I told her to cut it to my assets. Showed her. Showed her how much my hair shrinks when dry. Showed her on stretched out hair where to cut. Even with all that I left with hair above the shoulders. FIVE INCHES TOO SHORT!!! How does that happen?!? And don't get me started about high school when I wore it short and no stylist would believe me when I said I got cowlicks if they cut the right side too short. My high school years were spent with a hot iron and curlers permanently attached to tame those licks. Right now I've resigned myself to keeping my hair long and letting DH cut it when it's annoying. He does a far better job than anyone trained and that annoys me.

Good hairstylists who actually listen to me, where are you? How do I find you?
Terrible isn't it? I think the lack of length bothers me more than the lack of curls!!

I figured because the perm specialist was a man, he didn't think it importance as to how I wanted to keep the length, he was thinking of the final outcome he wanted....but didn't consult me!

My hairdresser is really good about not cutting too much off...she gets it!! But it will take me far to long to ever grow this out again, so it probably won't happen.

Sounds like your husband is doing a great job, I'd just keep him doing it!! LOL!

markuehl
02-15-2012, 08:24 AM
as a stylist i always say i can always cut more but i cant put it back! and clients really appreciate it

msmayor
02-15-2012, 08:31 AM
I have heard of some womens hair changes after kids, I have two but my hair really is the same. Fine, but lots of it.

I don't think weight would be a big issue, as my hair is very fine and light and I keep it pulled back away from my face all day at work. Which I really cannot do now, as it's too short.

Believe me, I've tried everything to keep curl in my hair. I've slept with rollers, sock method, 425 degree curling irons, two brands of hot rollers and making hair app'ts for special evenings....none of it works. Within 1hr it's all out, so the last few years I've just kept a straight style.

I look good with curly hair, better than straight!! But I guess it's not to be....

This is probably why the perm didn't accomplish the look you wanted...your hair simply doesn't want to hold a curl. Not so much a bad perm, but just the nature of your hair. A stylist who hasn't worked with your hair for a longer period of time can't really know the characteristics of your hair and if the stylist who did the perm never worked on your hair before, they wouldn't really know exactly how the perm would 'hold'.

My daughter has a similar problem...it won't hold curls and it won't hold color. Even permanent color 'washes' out of her hair in just a few weeks. Talking to my stylist, she said there are just some hair types you have to learn to live with and accept that you can't get a style you may love in a picture.

miry
02-15-2012, 10:13 PM
I know that this doesn't really help with the perm situation, but I love the long loose curls also, I have tried perming my hair with spiral rods, fat rods, the super long rods that clip together on the end - all without getting the right style. What I have found that does work is washing my hair at night, rag rolling it before bed and finger picking it with a little bit of shine oil in the morning.

To make my rag rolls, I cut two large cotton towels - the kind you use to dry dishes - and cut them into seven strips each. I fold seven of the stripes over each other into small rectangles. the other seven I leave long. I use one of rectangle and one long for each curl. I fold the rectangle on the tips of my hair (like they do with the little papers when they are rolling your hair for a perm), center the long one in the middle and roll it up to the top of my head where I tie the long one into a knot to hold it in place. It normally takes me about 7-8 minutes at night and about 2-3 in the morning.

I hope that you are able to get the look you want and that you really enjoy your cruise.

jelo
02-15-2012, 10:44 PM
This is probably why the perm didn't accomplish the look you wanted...your hair simply doesn't want to hold a curl. Not so much a bad perm, but just the nature of your hair. A stylist who hasn't worked with your hair for a longer period of time can't really know the characteristics of your hair and if the stylist who did the perm never worked on your hair before, they wouldn't really know exactly how the perm would 'hold'.

My daughter has a similar problem...it won't hold curls and it won't hold color. Even permanent color 'washes' out of her hair in just a few weeks. Talking to my stylist, she said there are just some hair types you have to learn to live with and accept that you can't get a style you may love in a picture.
My hair is perm resistant, but it will perm...it just takes longer.

This salon seems to have a differant "specialist" for everything you go for, so my stylist is just a stylist, someone else for colour and another for perms...etc....The first time I called I asked to have the perm with my girl, and when I was told she didn't perm I actually didn't make the app't because I was worried about having someone who didn't know my hair. Then I decided to have a little faith and booked the app't.

I called and spoke to both the "boss" and the fellow who permed my hair. He wants me to come in on Saturday morning so he can see for himself what it looks like. They don't do refunds, but they will re-perm or whatever to make me happy.

I did tell him that re-perming isn't going to give me back the 7 inches he cut off, it might damage my hair and get shorter. He insisted there would be no damage....

I so wanted to remain calm and cool while talking to him about how upset I was with my hair, but of course I got choked up and felt like an idiot!

jelo
02-21-2012, 09:26 PM
Just got back from the hairdresser, and yes....he repermed it!:rolleyes:

It looks really good, looks healthy and the curls aren't tight....:thumbsup2

It's definately shorter, because he cut too much off last weekend, but he was really sorry and bent over backwards to make me happy today!:yay:

Thanks for all your input everyone, now that my hair is fixed I can move on with my packing etc... Only 13 days to go!!!:dance3::dance3::dance3::dance3::dance3::danc e3::dance3::dance3::dance3::dance3::dance3::dance3 ::dance3::dance3::dance3::dance3::dance3

BeeTeacher
02-21-2012, 09:59 PM
In our mall they sell a thin ceramic rod style curling iron. They did my daughter's hair to try it out and she looked all taylor swift like and the curls stayed in all afternoon even though he used no products whatsoever on her.

We were like "Sold!" until we saw it was $80...

They can be bought online, just google BABY CURL.

gichicdoc
02-21-2012, 11:58 PM
as a stylist i always say i can always cut more but i cant put it back! and clients really appreciate it

LOL! That's what my stylist says too! And every time she cuts my hair, she always has to cut my bangs a little shorter (at my request)!! But I love her to pieces and would never let anyone else cut my hair :lovestruc

Been where the OP is and never want to go there again. When you find a good stylist, you stick with her/him!!

Ariel224
02-22-2012, 12:41 AM
In our mall they sell a thin ceramic rod style curling iron. They did my daughter's hair to try it out and she looked all taylor swift like and the curls stayed in all afternoon even though he used no products whatsoever on her.

We were like "Sold!" until we saw it was $80...

They can be bought online, just google BABY CURL.

About 1/3 that price on a certain website that sounds like a large jungle located in South America. ;) I may have to get one for my daughter.....except that she's scared to use a regular curling iron, let alone something like this.

OP, glad your re-perm turned out good.

m&m's mom
02-22-2012, 04:33 AM
About 1/3 that price on a certain website that sounds like a large jungle located in South America. ;) I may have to get one for my daughter.....except that she's scared to use a regular curling iron, let alone something like this.

OP, glad your re-perm turned out good.

Let me guess - AMAZON.com :lmao:

OP- glad to hear the update and that they made it right.
Thankfully the sock bun works perfectly for me.

Lainey321
02-22-2012, 08:43 AM
(anyone remember the 20 min. workout girls??
YES! Did you have leg warmers too? :lmao:

markuehl
02-22-2012, 09:01 AM
gchicdoc i had to check if you lived in Chicago LOL you could be one of my clients they often force me to cut their bangs shorter!

jelo
02-22-2012, 09:13 AM
YES! Did you have leg warmers too? :lmao:
I did!! In every colour of the rainbow!! LOL! Aaah the 80's, can't beat it for style..:)

gichicdoc
02-22-2012, 10:01 AM
gchicdoc i had to check if you lived in Chicago LOL you could be one of my clients they often force me to cut their bangs shorter!

Nope. Metro Detroit. Stylist is at Tricho Salon in Novi, named Servetta - but don't everyone show up at once! I wouldn't want to have to work to get in to see her ;)

AmyBiff
02-22-2012, 01:21 PM
So glad to hear it worked out for you (even though you can't get your length back). Why, oh why, can't some of them listen?!

My stylist recently injured her back so my hair had gotten really long and I decided to cut it again. It's usually about chin length with some layering and it had grown to below my shoulders. Anywho, I had to find someone new as Gigi is still out of commission. I went for a cut, described exactly what I wanted. Came home with one solid layer at chin length and another layer almost at my shouders. :confused3 I felt kinda like a brunette Mrs Brady. Lived with that for about two weeks and went back with a picture of how my hair used to look when Gigi used to cut it. She couldn't get the right side to look good so she kept snipping away at it. Then she gave me bangs. Not the little side swept piece that I had in the picture, bangs. At then end of the torture, the owner comes over and looks at me and says, "I like it. It's... ... ... asymetrical." The left side is about chin length and the right is about an inch and a half shorter. :scared1: My hair parts on the right and I had this scraggly, 1/2 inch bang-things on either side of my part. And she made no effort to align the back layer that corresponds to the left side to the much shorter right side, so there's a huge step from the back to the right side. I have to focus on keeping the left side tucked behind my ear because that's the only way I look close to normal.

It's been since Dec 31, and I'm going to yet another new place on March 15. I wanted to give it enough time to grow a bit, but also fix it before vacation. Hope it doesn't turn into a "beward the ides of March" situation.

Moral of the story: sometimes even bringing a picture of yourself doesn't help. :sad2: