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NYCDiane
01-27-2012, 09:19 PM
I've been thinking about letting my DD be an authorized user on 3 of my credit cards (all very low balance cards). The reason I want to do this is because down the road (in August) when she wants to go shopping for school clothes (entering HS) with her friends, I don't want to be tagging along. I also don't want to give her cash that she could lose (or not get correct change).

My thought was to get her her own card, let her use it (tell her there's only $100 on each card), and then take them back and put it away until the next time she needs new things.

Has anyone else done this? Any opinions on this?

englishteacha
01-27-2012, 09:21 PM
Personally, I wouldn't. Perhaps a prepaid card would be a better option.

elgerber
01-27-2012, 09:23 PM
I have both of my kids as users on one of my Disney Visas. My kids are very trustworthy and have never charged anything they shouldn't have. I did it so if I sent my son to the store for milk or something, or if they went somewhere with friends i was paying for, I didn't have to have cash handy or worry about it falling out of their pockets or something. Its worked fine, and never been a problem in any way.

Marionnette
01-27-2012, 09:27 PM
I've been thinking about letting my DD be an authorized user on 3 of my credit cards (all very low balance cards). The reason I want to do this is because down the road (in August) when she wants to go shopping for school clothes (entering HS) with her friends, I don't want to be tagging along. I also don't want to give her cash that she could lose (or not get correct change).

My thought was to get her her own card, let her use it (tell her there's only $100 on each card), and then take them back and put it away until the next time she needs new things.

Has anyone else done this? Any opinions on this?
I added each of my kids to one card. Each of them is on a different card so that I can tell who is charging what. No chance of blaming one of the other kids for using the card inappropriately. But the cards are under my name and they have the full credit limit on them. And they didn't get access to those cards until they were driving. They weren't young teens.

My only question would be, if you cannot trust that your daughter is capable of ensuring that she receives the correct change from a purchase, how can you expect her to keep track of her spending limit? Especially when the limit is as low as $100. If you only want to do this for back to school shopping and that's it, then maybe a Visa gift card would be a better idea.

MickeyManiac
01-27-2012, 09:32 PM
If your child is trustworthy I see no problem with it. The first time my DS needed gas and DH and I weren't in the area I decided to add him to my Disney Visa. He was given some basic rules and told any unauthorized (by me) charges would result in me removing him from the card. Easy come...easy go! ;) But we have not had a problem and I get the reward points.

cornflake
01-27-2012, 09:34 PM
I don't get the three cards and lying about the limit thing.

I mean first, she'd really believe that your credit cards have $100 limit? Why would she believe that? Why would anyone believe that?

Second, so you're charging her with like, thinking about if she finds a $101 coat, she can't actually get it, or she's got to add stuff up to make sure she doesn't go over by a penny, keep track of tax, etc.?

Third, as above, if you can't trust her to that extent or to the extent that she'd give you back your change, maybe this isn't the best idea at all - are you sure she'd even buy clothes?

NYCDiane
01-27-2012, 09:52 PM
I don't get the three cards and lying about the limit thing.

I mean first, she'd really believe that your credit cards have $100 limit? Why would she believe that? Why would anyone believe that?

Second, so you're charging her with like, thinking about if she finds a $101 coat, she can't actually get it, or she's got to add stuff up to make sure she doesn't go over by a penny, keep track of tax, etc.?

Third, as above, if you can't trust her to that extent or to the extent that she'd give you back your change, maybe this isn't the best idea at all - are you sure she'd even buy clothes?

I never said I don't trust her. I trust her completely. I also never said I was worried about her not giving me the change -- what I said was that I was worried about her getting the correct change at the store since not all store clerks are trustworthy, especially when they see younger teens come in unsupervised.

The three cards are for three different stores.

About her believing the credit limit --- doesn't matter. If I tell her you can only charge $100 per card, that's what she would do. I'm sure if she found "THE" coat and it was $101, she would call me and ask if she could get it.

I don't get your last comment " are you sure she'd even buy clothes" What does THAT mean???

I don't see any constructive input from you on this topic at all. I'm wondering why you even bothered posting???

NYCDiane
01-27-2012, 10:06 PM
Thank you for all the great replies and advice.

I thought about a prepaid, but I'm thinking if I give her 1 card with a $300 limit, she might spend it all in one store. My thought was $100 at each store this way she'll be able to get a variety of styles.

I still have a few months to think about it. :)

Thanks again!!!!!!!

cornflake
01-27-2012, 10:13 PM
I never said I don't trust her. I trust her completely. I also never said I was worried about her not giving me the change -- what I said was that I was worried about her getting the correct change at the store since not all store clerks are trustworthy, especially when they see younger teens come in unsupervised.

The three cards are for three different stores.

About her believing the credit limit --- doesn't matter. If I tell her you can only charge $100 per card, that's what she would do. I'm sure if she found "THE" coat and it was $101, she would call me and ask if she could get it.

I don't get your last comment " are you sure she'd even buy clothes" What does THAT mean???

I don't see any constructive input from you on this topic at all. I'm wondering why you even bothered posting???

I'm not the only one who read not get correct change as you not getting it back from her.

The are you sure was because it seemed like you were setting up multiple stopgaps instead of just getting her one of your ccs and handing it to her and telling her what she was allowed to spend. One assumes - and again, I'm not the only one - you had some reason to feel you needed that many controls over it. Like, maybe she's not ready to be allowed to shop on her own if this much is a concern that you'd need this many controls.

I posted because.. .you asked!

I was given a cc before I started h.s. too, to keep (unless I ran up unauthorized charges and didn't pay for them), so I could shop by myself and if I needed money and etc. It was just... 'here's a card. If I don't tell you you can buy x, y, or z, you'd better have cash in hand when the bill comes or you'll never see that card again.'

LJSquishy
01-27-2012, 10:16 PM
Your daughter is obviously fairly responsible and trustworthy or else you wouldn't even be considering adding her to any of your credit card accounts. When I was younger I was very responsible and would never charge anything to my parents account without their consent.

I do think using a credit card is safer for you both than giving her cash. I wouldn't worry so much about the cashier giving back the correct amount of change, but I would worry about her accidentally losing or dropping the cash, especially since she will be out having fun with her friends. It is much easier for her to keep track of one card.

I probably wouldn't add her to all three of your accounts, as having her carry around three cards is a bit confusing and she may forget which ones she has already used (you mentioned telling her she could spend $100 on each card). If she is responsible enough to go shopping on her own and use your card to pay for her clothing, then she is responsible enough to figure out how to ration her $300 total limit throughout various stores.

I think it is great that you have a daughter who you can trust, and she is mighty lucky to have you as a parent who will give her the freedom and ability to make her own responsible choices. :)

Tink-aholic
01-27-2012, 10:21 PM
My 16 yo son is on my card that technically has no limit. He runs errands for me now that he wouldn't have been able to before, like pick up prescriptions, groceries, fill up the tank, etc.

If you would let your kid drive your car (worth thousands), why would you only let them use a prepaid card?

The best part is my son's ss# is also attached to this card, so that he will have several years of perfect credit by the time he leaves high school. ;)

NYCDiane
01-28-2012, 05:05 AM
I'm not the only one who read not get correct change as you not getting it back from her.

No, actually you're the only one who said that. The one other person who mentioned it said that if I'm worried about her getting the correct change from a cashier....... NOT that I said I was worried about her not giving me the correct change.

The are you sure was because it seemed like you were setting up multiple stopgaps instead of just getting her one of your ccs and handing it to her and telling her what she was allowed to spend. One assumes - and again, I'm not the only one - you had some reason to feel you needed that many controls over it. Like, maybe she's not ready to be allowed to shop on her own if this much is a concern that you'd need this many controls.

I subsequently explained: three stores, three cards.

I posted because.. .you asked!


I asked for advice/opinions, not for someone to completely misunderstand my post and then make some asinine accusation against my daughter: are you sure she'd even buy clothes?

NYCDiane
01-28-2012, 05:06 AM
Your daughter is obviously fairly responsible and trustworthy or else you wouldn't even be considering adding her to any of your credit card accounts. When I was younger I was very responsible and would never charge anything to my parents account without their consent.

I do think using a credit card is safer for you both than giving her cash. I wouldn't worry so much about the cashier giving back the correct amount of change, but I would worry about her accidentally losing or dropping the cash, especially since she will be out having fun with her friends. It is much easier for her to keep track of one card.

I probably wouldn't add her to all three of your accounts, as having her carry around three cards is a bit confusing and she may forget which ones she has already used (you mentioned telling her she could spend $100 on each card). If she is responsible enough to go shopping on her own and use your card to pay for her clothing, then she is responsible enough to figure out how to ration her $300 total limit throughout various stores.

I think it is great that you have a daughter who you can trust, and she is mighty lucky to have you as a parent who will give her the freedom and ability to make her own responsible choices. :)

Thank you for your great post! :)

BridgetBordeaux
01-28-2012, 06:30 AM
As Tink-aholic said, your child will also start to develop a credit file and that will be very helpful when they apply for their first card on their own. We have a USAA cc and they encouraged us put DD on the acount as an authorized user. Between that, and our DD's teen checking account, she should be in good shape credit wise when she goes out on her own in life (from a credit standpoint).

Green Tea
01-28-2012, 07:32 AM
I just gave my DD my card to shop with. She was never not able to use it.

Green Tea
01-28-2012, 07:34 AM
As Tink-aholic said, your child will also start to develop a credit file and that will be very helpful when they apply for their first card on their own. We have a USAA cc and they encouraged us put DD on the acount as an authorized user. Between that, and our DD's teen checking account, she should be in good shape credit wise when she goes out on her own in life (from a credit standpoint).

Everyone here says this, but my child had their own checking account for 7 years and had a card in their name for 4 years as an authorized user on my card and when they graduated there was still an empty credit file. Maybe different banks report different things to the agencies. I'm not sure.

sunshinehighway
01-28-2012, 08:02 AM
American Express has a pretty good prepaid card. There's no monthly fees and no reload fees. You can even sign up for a card for her so its in her name but you control it. It also comes with the protections Amex gives real credit cards.

From what others have said, it sounds like putting her on your card may not do anything for establishing her credit.

Maybe a prepaid card is a good way to test the waters. You'll see how she does with a card. Once she shows you how she handles it, you can put her on your accounts.

PlutoPony
01-28-2012, 08:19 AM
We added our son to one of our CC's after he got his driver's license, so he has a card with his name on it. He knows we check the bill carefully each month and understands that unauthorized spending will be caught and there will be consequences. Hopefully by the time he goes to college in a few years he'll have a decent understanding of how much things really cost and how much they add up. My biggest concern with him having a CC is the kid making sure it doesn't get lost or stolen and used by an unauthorized user. Since he doesn't actually use it very often we're trying to get him in the habit of checking regularly to make sure it's still in his wallet, not simply out of sight out of mind kwim?

prncess674
01-28-2012, 08:45 AM
I would just give her one or two cards. The $100 on each sounds strange. Also is $300 her summer clothing budget? I would not trust a 13 year old to pick out a complete useful wardrobe. I would maybe give her $100 so she could buy something that she absolutely loves, but then I would go back with her later to try on all the things she liked while window shopping with friends. I also think most young teens would see $300 as a "spend to" amount rather than a budget. Would she try to spend every last penny.

phred52
01-28-2012, 09:18 AM
What we did is just a bit different. When our dd's were young teens, I opened a new disney visa credit card in MY name with dd's name also on as an authorized user. Then when the cards came in the mail we sat at dinner and had a family discussion about it all, the responsibility .... yackity yack yack. then I CUT UP the card with MY name on it and gave the other card to dd. Showing her that absolutely everything that was charged to that card was her responsibility. Did this for both dd's two years apart.

If I wanted dd to buy me something and she used "her" credit card, I paid her in cash and she kept track of it all.

Do you know, never once was there an issue. NEVER! Now, both dd's are out on their own, those original credit cards are long gone and they are using their own disney visa's. :goodvibes

veraletta
01-28-2012, 02:11 PM
I did this with all three of my children and would never do it again.
All three of my children worked at the age of 16 and had saving account which
they seemed to be responsible with.
I found out the hard way that a credit card was too easy for them to charge anything they wanted.
The oldest was responsible but the other two were not.
middle child even graduated at the age of 17 and went to college while in high school. In one month she charged almost 2k on my credit card, which when the bill came in I did make her pay it all off and took charge card away.
So lesson learned, so I thought, I waited until my youngest was out of high school and was working, a full time job.

He was just like his sister and over charged but took him a few years, so took him off my credit card. Well because he was on my credit card for some time, he was able to open three credit cards in his own name. Which he ended up charging over 14k.

He is now in the Air Force and paying them all off. I think some people can do good with credit cards, while other seems to buy everything and end up owing a lot of credit debt. While it is a good way for them to built up their credit, down side is that it sometime teaching them they don't have to wait and save for the things they want.

cornflake
01-28-2012, 02:18 PM
No, actually you're the only one who said that. The one other person who mentioned it said that if I'm worried about her getting the correct change from a cashier....... NOT that I said I was worried about her not giving me the correct change.

I subsequently explained: three stores, three cards.

I asked for advice/opinions, not for someone to completely misunderstand my post and then make some asinine accusation against my daughter:

If you're worried about her ability to shop independently to this extent, again - that she can't get the correct change/won't know what the correct change is/won't look/etc., won't shop for different things unless she's only given three store cards, otherwise she'd just buy everything in one place, etc., etc. - perhaps she's not ready to be allowed to shop on her own.

Also... opinion doesn't mean 'people to agree with me.'

minnie1928
01-28-2012, 03:00 PM
As Tink-aholic said, your child will also start to develop a credit file and that will be very helpful when they apply for their first card on their own. We have a USAA cc and they encouraged us put DD on the acount as an authorized user. Between that, and our DD's teen checking account, she should be in good shape credit wise when she goes out on her own in life (from a credit standpoint).

Being an authorized user no longer builds credit for that person. Years ago, yes...but within the past few years they changed that. I believe it had to do with the fact that an authorized user is not actually responsible for the debt, the primary cardholder is and that is who earns the credit history.

Also, while having a checking account will provide some history for opening another deposit account (if the bank reports to Chexsystems or a similar program), it won't provide any credit history. Quite simply, credit is not involved in a checking account so there's no credit history to report.

Personally, to the OPs original question...I don't see what the big deal is. If she trusts her daughter, then let her use the cards. However, I wouldn't necessarily assume that she'll need 3 separate cards at 3 separate stores to get what she wants. What if the first 2 stores don't really have anything? Then she's stuck with $100 at store #3. I would either give her the cash or a prepaid visa card. She could lose either one and she could be overcharged (the equivalent of getting incorrect change) on either one. Now, that I think about it...I think I would just go cash/prepaid. It's less hassle than having her added to your store credit cards and if the store cards were lost that could open a whole other can of worms.

Tink-aholic
01-28-2012, 03:31 PM
Being an authorized user no longer builds credit for that person. Years ago, yes...but within the past few years they changed that. I believe it had to do with the fact that an authorized user is not actually responsible for the debt, the primary cardholder is and that is who earns the credit history.Also, while having a checking account will provide some history for opening another deposit account (if the bank reports to Chexsystems or a similar program), it won't provide any credit history. Quite simply, credit is not involved in a checking account so there's no credit history to report.

Personally, to the OPs original question...I don't see what the big deal is. If she trusts her daughter, then let her use the cards. However, I wouldn't necessarily assume that she'll need 3 separate cards at 3 separate stores to get what she wants. What if the first 2 stores don't really have anything? Then she's stuck with $100 at store #3. I would either give her the cash or a prepaid visa card. She could lose either one and she could be overcharged (the equivalent of getting incorrect change) on either one. Now, that I think about it...I think I would just go cash/prepaid. It's less hassle than having her added to your store credit cards and if the store cards were lost that could open a whole other can of worms.

Bank of America credit cards allowed me to include my DS's SS# so that he is building credit. It cuts both ways, though -- if I were to default, then it would hurt him, too. But that won't happen because I pay it off every month.

minnie1928
01-28-2012, 03:41 PM
Bank of America credit cards allowed me to include my DS's SS# so that he is building credit. It cuts both ways, though -- if I were to default, then it would hurt him, too. But that won't happen because I pay it off every month.

In that circumstance he's not an "authorized user" he's a co-owner on the account. He's as liable as you are.

ZehnJahren
01-28-2012, 06:02 PM
While I understand your point of view, OP, I think giving your daughter access to your credit card when you can't even trust her to get back exact change is probably not the best idea.

If you have such unscrupulous characters working at the shops around you that they might short her by $20 or $30 when she uses cash to pay for her items, imagine how they could trick her when she's using a credit card. Further, she's no more likely to keep a close eye on a card than she is on cash. It can be dropped or forgotten just as easily.

I would think, in this case, either cash (which she should be able to handle at her age, and if she cannot then the consequences would be an excellent learning tool) or a prepaid debit card (with the ability to cancel it if she does drop or lose it) would be the best choices for you.

NYCDiane
01-28-2012, 10:47 PM
Lots of great answers and advice here. I like that prepaid AmEx in her name. That's something I'm thinking of.

I might just do this: give her the cards (or the prepaid AmEx), go with her to the store (much as I don't want to :eek: ) and kind of "guide" her with the card, etc and see how she does. I've already sent her into my bank's ATM with my card to get money (after teaching her) and she did fine with that (made sure to take the card, receipt and money!). I guess I'll teach her how to use cards, too.

She's responsible, though, and I'm sure she'll be fine after I teach her at one or two stores.

NYCDiane
01-28-2012, 10:48 PM
In that circumstance he's not an "authorized user" he's a co-owner on the account. He's as liable as you are.

Absolutely. If you ever become delinquent on that account, he is just as responsible for it and they will go after him.

pigletto
01-28-2012, 11:25 PM
My first response was "OMG NO!!".
Then I read the responses and really thought about it. My dd is going to be 15, saves her own money very responsibly, and is extremely trustworthy in all other aspects.
It's just that she's still a kid in many ways, and does many kid things like losing her exam card and me having to rush it to her the other day. Printing out her homework assignment and walking out the door without it, a room that looks like a bomb went off.
I trust her, but to me credit cards aren't somewhere I want to go with her right now. It doesn't seem all that necessary I suppose. I go shopping with her, or give her some cash. She rarely does all of it at once anyway.

I am not sure why I feel so strongly against it, I just don't think we're there yet. To me, allowing her to use my credit card is for when she's driving and has a job beyond babysitting and is a few years older.:confused3

cornflake
01-28-2012, 11:38 PM
My first response was "OMG NO!!".
Then I read the responses and really thought about it. My dd is going to be 15, saves her own money very responsibly, and is extremely trustworthy in all other aspects.
It's just that she's still a kid in many ways, and does many kid things like losing her exam card and me having to rush it to her the other day. Printing out her homework assignment and walking out the door without it, a room that looks like a bomb went off.
I trust her, but to me credit cards aren't somewhere I want to go with her right now. It doesn't seem all that necessary I suppose. I go shopping with her, or give her some cash. She rarely does all of it at once anyway.

I am not sure why I feel so strongly against it, I just don't think we're there yet. To me, allowing her to use my credit card is for when she's driving and has a job beyond babysitting and is a few years older.:confused3
I think it probably depends on lifestyle and the kid. I was out all the time by myself and shopping by myself for all sorts of things, as were most of my friends by the time we started h.s., so it was just simpler to give out a parental cc. Most of my friends had one - both for the authorized purchases like clothes or haircuts and for 'pick up X at the market.'

If that's not your kid, then it's less necessary. I will say the room and stuff I don't think are necessarily connected. If she's not trustworthy with cash, like if she forgets that or messes up, then I'd be wary but I know plenty of kids with cyclone rooms who are all 'oooh, forgot my notebook' who still don't mess up monetary transactions - same as they might forget to load the dishwasher but wouldn't forget to feed their sibling, they know what's serious. If they'd forget to feed the sibling, perhaps not ready! :lmao:

mistysue
01-29-2012, 07:08 AM
I had a friend in high school whose parents gave her a credit card. She was ALWAYS responsible about it- until a couple years after she got it, that one day when she went into a pet store and bought me a cat as a present. A non-returnable $300 cat.

She couldn't have it because of allergies, my parents didn't agree to it, it's not like they could make my parents pay them back- she bought it as a gift. They just had a $300 cc bill and the girl had no job, so no way to repay them the money.

Nearly every person with a cc will eventually do something irresponsible like this, even if it's buying her friend some new jeans because the friend can't get them. If you hand out a credit card, I would just be prepared for it. Even adults will eventually do something irresponsible. (for all the budget boarders who always jump in to say they've never been irresponsible, :rolleyes: you are NOT the average person)

NYCDiane
01-29-2012, 10:50 AM
Nearly every person with a cc will eventually do something irresponsible like this, even if it's buying her friend some new jeans because the friend can't get them. If you hand out a credit card, I would just be prepared for it. Even adults will eventually do something irresponsible. (for all the budget boarders who always jump in to say they've never been irresponsible, :rolleyes: you are NOT the average person)

I know I have!!! (and for those who CLAIM they never have ---- okay, we believe you! :rolleyes: )

LOL!

pigletto
01-29-2012, 10:56 AM
I think it probably depends on lifestyle and the kid. I was out all the time by myself and shopping by myself for all sorts of things, as were most of my friends by the time we started h.s., so it was just simpler to give out a parental cc. Most of my friends had one - both for the authorized purchases like clothes or haircuts and for 'pick up X at the market.'

If that's not your kid, then it's less necessary. I will say the room and stuff I don't think are necessarily connected. If she's not trustworthy with cash, like if she forgets that or messes up, then I'd be wary but I know plenty of kids with cyclone rooms who are all 'oooh, forgot my notebook' who still don't mess up monetary transactions - same as they might forget to load the dishwasher but wouldn't forget to feed their sibling, they know what's serious. If they'd forget to feed the sibling, perhaps not ready! :lmao:

You are right. It really does depend on the lifestyle of the kid in question too. We're in a somewhat rural area, so shopping trips always involve a parent driver for one. For two, she wears a uniform and is still pretty content to let me buy most of her weekend clothes. It's gotten to the point where we look online together and she says "Yes" or "No" but we end up ordering most of it. So I guess it just hasn't come up.

She's thinking of a few international school trips during high school. One to Italy, for example. I can totally see allowing her use of my credit card for that. I guess it just really hasn't come up for us. Her friends have their own money usually from part time jobs and they mostly hang out at each others houses.

Sorry to take over your thread OP. It's not that I think it's inherently wrong, I had just really never considered it at all because nobody she knows does it.

I would say in your case that either she's responsible enough to have use of the card or she's not. I would probably think twice if I had to jump through hoops like 3 different cards and misleading her about the limits. When she's ready she should be all ready IMO.

iheartpeterpan
01-29-2012, 02:26 PM
When my son turned 16 I put him as an additional on one of my CCs, so that he would have a card with his own name on it to buy gas, or other things I sent him to buy. He is responsible andI trust him. He also knows that he will be one dead duck if he ever uses it for something that he's not supposed to. It depends on the kid, I suppose. He has never charged anything to it that he wasn't supposed to, so it works for us. He also has his own checking account, which he manages on his own with his own money, and his own debit card tied to his checking account - which he uses for his personal expenses.

I think it's very important for kids to have these experiences while they are still in my house and I can still guide them - rather than have no clue about personal finance and be thrown into it after they leave. Which happens far too often IMO.