Theoretically, would there be anything wrong with giving a HORSE a BEER to drink????? [Archive] - The DIS Discussion Forums

SideshowBob

10-21-2002, 12:02 PM

Last night, SideshowBob was wandering around after attending the "Food & Wine Festival" at Epcot (which was QUITE outstanding, by the way) ....

Happened to be carrying a couple of beers with, in the big plastic All Star Cafe kind of cups that you get at Orlando Rays games, at the Wide World of Sports..... when spotting out in a pasture a couple of large horses (behind a split rail kind of fence).

So.... SSB starts neighing (sp?) at the horses... and sure enough... the smaller of the two comes sauntering over. Then SSB thinks, er, um.... what the heck do I do now. Knew that I had apples.... but a good long walk back to get them. When a kid, SSB once had a HUGE horse named "London" bite me so hard on the shoulder, that I was bleeding like a stuck pig (is that not a horrifying expression, or what!)

So.......... the other BIG horse comes up to the railing now. Having VERY bad memories of what happened earlier in life when a monster horse came up to SSB.... decide that there is just one course of action....

GIVE THE HORSE ONE OF THE BEERS!

SSB remembers seeing one drink one in a movie once (can't recall the flick name).... so knew that it could be done. Sure enough, put the cup up to the horse's mouth (er, um... isn't that some other expression?) .... and the horse CHUGS the beer.... swear!!!

The horse, let's call her "Bonnie", then snorts! And makes some other noises, but seems to have liked it. SSB is kind and all, but no way that I was parting with the second beer. THEN, I start wondering..... "Do horses burp?" .... I always remember the exploding seagull stories from youth, about the alka seltzers and all... and wonder.... is the horse going to explode, or sumpin'?

Having this thought.... decide best to "get the heck out of Dodge", and scurry across highway 535!!!

PS: No evil jokes, SSB has dirt on a lot of you... hehe. ;) ;) ;)

Deb in IA

10-21-2002, 12:06 PM

SSB, SSB, SSB, you DO have the most interesting encounters!

Sorry, I can't answer your question. I'll let the experts (DocRafiki, DixieDreamer, or ahnalira, or other "horse" people out there) handle it.

By the way, why did you have 2 beers??

browneyes

10-21-2002, 12:08 PM

I wouldn't want to be around if a horse burps up beer. EW!

ratsrule

10-21-2002, 12:10 PM

Well you can lead a horse to a keg, but ya can't make him drink

gemmie214

10-21-2002, 12:11 PM

You gave away your beer? Hmmmm, wanna hang out;)

pumba

10-21-2002, 12:13 PM

they boarded at a track near her area....so this one horse had a beer with the guys every saturday evening.....he drank a whole miller ....what ever kind that was.....well this big horse lived forever at the race track even after his racing days were over...cause he was "ONE OF THE GUYS"...I think that the horse was only a one can man though

Poohlovr

10-21-2002, 12:32 PM

I'm still finding it hard to believe that you actually gave one of your beers away. :rolleyes:

Jeff in BigD

10-21-2002, 12:46 PM

Well horses do like barley, right?

Originally posted by Deb in IA
By the way, why did you have 2 beers??
I think the answer is probably "I have 2 hands, you know", at least that's my usual answer. :teeth:

Marla Hellwig

10-21-2002, 12:54 PM

Well I haven't heard of stories of exploding horses around the lemonaide stand - so I am guessing you are safe for now SSB - me thinks maybe you should keep your beers to yourself in the future

oldkicker

10-21-2002, 12:56 PM

I think it's just fine.

Especially if it's PBR or Bud.

Of course then the real trick is finding a horse who'll take 'em. :)

catsrule

10-21-2002, 01:00 PM

very glad simba decided to stay home yesterday.:teeth:

glo

10-21-2002, 01:07 PM

YOU gave away a beer????

Was it an oil can? That could make the difference you know...

I still can't believe it....were you feeling ok???

Towncrier

10-21-2002, 02:06 PM

As long as you didn't give the horse one of those Viking beers from Norway, I think everything will be just fine.

BTW - Horses can burp, they just cannot vomit. :earseek:
Rabbits cannot vomit either. I heard this on a radio during the "impossible question" portion of the drive-time progam.

Feel free to file that under "Too Much Information".
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Beauty

10-21-2002, 02:18 PM

ROTFLOL! My DH hardly ever reads the DIS but when he sees a post or I tell him about a post from SSB he stops and reads......thanks for the laugh!! I'm sure the horse will be fine, and likely your best buddie if you ever cross her path again.

Mickeyfaniam

10-21-2002, 02:20 PM

it does pay to carry TWO beers...right Bob?? :teeth:

10-21-2002, 02:21 PM

Where were you walking, with two beers, in cups, where you would find two horses? Isn't there an open container law in Florida? I never know what adventure you're going to have. I hope the horse is okay. But, since beer's made of barley, I'd assume it okay. Sorry about your previous horse experience though, do you feel better now?

DaisyDebbie

10-21-2002, 02:53 PM

I'll bet you made that horses night :teeth: He'll be looking for you again :)

PandyPaws

10-21-2002, 03:46 PM

Should we expect to see him at DATW?? Is this or new mascot, or sumpin??? ;) :teeth:

NHAnn

10-21-2002, 03:54 PM

Bob Bob Bob
ROTFLMAO

I will ask my local equine expert (DD), what she thinks. Considering the weight of a horse I wouldn't think a beer could have much impact on the blood/alcohol level.

You are tooooooo funny. :teeth: :teeth:

charlie,nj

10-21-2002, 04:05 PM

Beer drinking horses are corn cool!

Debi

10-21-2002, 04:09 PM

Ditto what NHAnn said - given the weight of the horse, I doubt a beer (or in this case, 2) could have much of an imapct on the horse. However, this does make a person wonder: What happens when a horse gets drunk? What does a drunk horse look like? :)

denisem

10-21-2002, 04:22 PM

Don't know about horses, but expensive Japanese cows drink beer regularly:

Kobe Beef (http://www.foodreference.com/html/artkobebeef.html)

Denise < --- has been waiting for YEARS to use this useless piece of trivia ;)

Towncrier

10-21-2002, 04:24 PM

CookieGVB

10-21-2002, 04:38 PM

You must've been carrying some of these: ;)

http://bfcgroup.com/helluvatough/cgi-bin/bttlebanner.jpg

CRB#33

10-21-2002, 04:45 PM

OMG!

I am ROTFLOL!!

You have GOT to be kidding!

Beer? Mr. Ed???? Burping horses!

BWAAHAHAHAHAAA:p :p :p

WebmasterAlex

10-21-2002, 05:22 PM

Horse walks into a bar, orders a beer, sits down at one of the tables, and starts reading his paper.

The bartender is a bit shocked by all this, but pours the beer, and brings it over to the horse, who proffers a ten dollar bill for it. Now the barman figures the horse isn't that bright, so he decides to pull the old 'short-change' trick on him. He duly goes back to the horse with 1 dollar. The horse doesn't say a word.

The horse eventually finishes his beer and goes up to the bar to order another. Says the bartender to him, "Y'know, we don't get many horses in here."

To which the horse replies, "At nine dollars a beer, I'm not surprised!"

Patrick IL.

10-21-2002, 05:25 PM

I have to respect a horse who drinks beer :) Was it an oilcan?? May be the horse could come to DATW?

TennVolTony

10-21-2002, 05:31 PM

Now hold on just a minute here SSB! I've been to EPCOT...and I have YET to see a horse, let alone 2 horses.:rolleyes: How many beers did you say you had?? I've seen some strange things but NEVER horses after drinking a couple at EPCOT..... ;)

Pandy...I can see SSB riding up on a drunk little horse in Sponge Bob shorts ( the horse will have the shorts on) and SSB's feet dragging the ground as he rides in! The horse says "I found BIG FOOT"!! "Now gimme another FOSTER'S!!"

And SSB...Bonnie may not like being called a horse.....and It won't matter HOW MANY beers you THINK you had.... :D

SSB...are you sure you weren't at a baseball game somewhere??
How many fingers am I holding up???

:p

JohnTBap

10-21-2002, 06:05 PM

Dude, you wasted a BEER!!! :mad:

Mermaid02

10-21-2002, 06:11 PM

I hope you offered ALL the horses beer..... manners Robert manners!:rolleyes:

Val

10-21-2002, 06:18 PM

Don't know about beer- but on New Year's Eve we always give a little of the bubbly to our horses......just a snort though! Don't want to deal with hung-over horses! Ugh! think about mucking out THOSE stalls!!!!

And yes, I swear I have heard our horses burp!

Zurg

10-21-2002, 06:28 PM

ROFLOL

So SSB is two fisting it when he sees horeses at the Food & Wine festival? drinking beer?

Ahhhh... Bob... how many had you pounded back before you saw these horses?

Anyone want to bet this was a couple of college interns is Tapestry costumes and old Bob wasn't thinking/seeing too clearly.

SonjaB

10-21-2002, 07:52 PM

We'll raise up our glasses
against evil forces
singin'
Whiskey for my men
Beer for my horses.....

SSB has the best adventures! http://www.disboards.com/images/smilies/teeth.gif

But I can't believe he gave up a BEER!!!!! :eek:

Michelle

10-21-2002, 08:27 PM

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU, SSB, for the biggest LAUGH I have had in a long time! :teeth:

A horse is a horse
Of course of course
And no one can talk to a horse,
Of course
That is, of course
Unless the horse
Is talked to by SSB!

;) :p

Dan Murphy

10-21-2002, 10:56 PM

:teeth:

PandyPaws

10-21-2002, 11:29 PM

Not to worry, SSB, apparently it's safe :p
Ghost, the Champion Beer Drinking Horse (http://www.atlanticbreezes.com/oc-athlete.htm)

In fact:

Sultan drinks 15 pints a day (http://www.moggies.co.uk/wybi/sultan.html)

<IMG SRC=http://www.moggies.co.uk/wybi/sultan.jpg>

"Draught horse Sultan lives up to his job title by downing up to 15 pints of beer a day.

The big black shire waits in pub car parks while owner Simon Powell nips to the bar.

Then he steadies each glass with his teeth and guzzles the contents in 20 seconds flat.

The 11-year-old gelding likes a tipple as he and Simon head home to Shackerstone, Warwicks, from cart horse displays at farm shows across Britain.

Simon said: "I love people’s faces when he grips the glass and swills his tongue round inside."

"He likes lager, Guinness or bitter and he’s such a whopping beast a few now and again do him no harm. The only problem is he never buys a round!"

An RSPCA spokeswoman said: "Beer contains barley and grain. It’ll do no harm in moderation."

:teeth: :teeth: :teeth:

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WillyJ

10-21-2002, 11:37 PM

I'd think giving a horse a beer or two would be fine Bob. . . now whiskey- that would be just wrong!! :eek:

;)

:teeth:

betz

10-22-2002, 05:50 AM

Let me see if I understand this story correctly.
First you are at the food and wine shindig, then somehow you are wandering on highway 535 with carrying a couple of beers big plastic cups.
This is the first place I am stumped. Why are you wandering on a highway with two monolith beers?

Then after you encouter the Big Horse, you name her Bonnie. All of a sudden in the midst of your wanderings upon a highway you are on a first name basis with a horse named Bonnie and you buy her a drink? This again is rather odd, until I realise you would rather buy Bonnie a Beer than to be bleeding like a stuck pig again.

To answer your question, sure a real horse can drink a beer, but I would not waste a good ale on a Bonnie Horse.

My final question to you would be, after you "decide best to "get the heck out of Dodge", and scurry across highway 535!!!", what did you find on the other side of the highway?

SideshowBob

10-22-2002, 09:09 AM

Some most intriguing, er, um.... "comments", from my friends!! ;)

Yes, the "highway" dealee was AFTER the "Food and Wine" festival, so SSB is pretty darn certain that it really WAS a horse, or two.... :) ... did grow up in the country, you know.... ;)

Well, Ms. BumbleBee Betz (or Bets), after crossing the highway, SSB discovered some of those DARN political big old metal signs that clutter up the roadway, so started slinging them like frisbees out into the open country. (NOT toward traffic.... haha)

The big debate that SSB had LAST night, was which darn cup, was the one that the HORSE drank out of!!!! They looked the same, so decided to just go ahead and take my chances!

ACK!!!!!

:)

glo

10-22-2002, 10:11 AM

Ok, remind me to never ever EVER drink anything from anything that SSB has in his hands. A horse might have drunk out of it :eek:

Still, I can't believe you gave the horse your beer...and we don't know if it is an oilcan....and why did you stop and look at the horses anyway???

betz

10-22-2002, 10:22 AM

Umm, Bob. You are not upset about anything.
Throwing signs, drinking from the horses mouth, wandering alone (or with 'Bonnie Horse') along long stretches of highway ...

SideshowBob

10-22-2002, 11:10 AM

No, just a great night for a long walk!

Well, SSB does HATE those signs that clutter the highway, and almost every place you stop for a stop sign in Orlando. If not the politcal ones.... you have all of those "houses by" type ones also. Not certain why they are not illegal. See pickups with literally hundreds of them at a time, putting them out.... why is that not littering??? Oops... on my soapbox, or stand, or whatever... :) :) :)

Brisully

10-22-2002, 12:45 PM

Mr. SSB, I have a question.....

If one were to arrive at DATW IV, dressed in a horse outfit, would it be wrong to assume that Mr. SSB would procure drafts for said horse all evening????

:smooth: :cool:

SonjaB

10-22-2002, 12:55 PM

Guess it depends on which end of the horse one came dressed as, Bris... ;) ;) ;)

http://www.disboards.com/images/smilies/teeth.gif

Towncrier

10-22-2002, 01:38 PM

I call heads!!!!!!
(Phew - That was close)

And remember: You can lead a horse to Fosters, but you can't make it drunk.

Brisully

10-22-2002, 01:59 PM

Originally posted by Towncrier
[B]I call heads!!!!!!B]

Aww, mannnn!!!!!!!

Debi

10-22-2002, 02:19 PM

Bri, that's a good idea in theory, but what happens when 30+ DISers show up in horse costumes? Will SSB buy adult beverages for all 30+ horses? :)

SideshowBob

10-23-2002, 08:33 AM

Methnks that we would have to go to "Trough Style" drinking for that many "horses" !!!

How much does a trough of beer cost? Hrmmmmm......

;)

JesNJakesMom

10-23-2002, 08:47 AM

While growing up we had quite a few horses. One in particular absolutely LOVED beer! If she saw the bottle she'd bother the heck out of you until you gave it to her. She'd actually take the bottle from you between her lips and put her mouth in the air and chug the entire bottle. I was always surprised she didn't break the bottle with her teeth or something. She was a fine horse other than that!

Towncrier

10-23-2002, 09:45 AM

NOTE TO SELF: Make sure to drink from the trough with the beer!!

SideshowBob

02-23-2004, 02:49 PM

Wish Mr. Alex had not given us back the "Search" option...

SSB has been having a great time looking at threads over the last few years!!!

Never "heard" the sound on this one... haha!!!!

KristaTX

02-23-2004, 03:03 PM

Wow - this is an old thread.

Originally posted by Towncrier
BTW - Horses can burp, they just cannot vomit. :earseek:
Rabbits cannot vomit either.

I'm glad to know that John has always been a source of helpful information :teeth:.

Krista

Towncrier

02-23-2004, 03:04 PM

But they never ask those kinds of questions on Millionaire. :(

Dan Murphy

02-23-2004, 03:05 PM

Originally posted by SideshowBob
Wish Mr. Alex had not given us back the "Search" option...

SSB has been having a great time looking at threads over the last few years!!!

Never "heard" the sound on this one... haha!!!! Be careful what you search for, SSB. :eek: :teeth:

KristaTX

02-23-2004, 03:19 PM

Originally posted by Towncrier
But they never ask those kinds of questions on Millionaire. :(

You just wait - I bet we hear a question about animal vomit sometime soon :)

Krista

Towncrier

02-23-2004, 03:23 PM

Only if you force them to eat ancho peppers with their beer.

BambiTamby

02-23-2004, 09:49 PM

<marquee direction="right">http://www.boomerweb.net/users/**********/ssbhorsiedrunk.gif </marquee>

WebmasterAlex

02-23-2004, 10:01 PM

we all know that SSB is a kind man and a wonderful purpose... I think that I should make his wishes come true....

KristaTX

02-23-2004, 10:02 PM

Nah. . .

Pin Wizard

02-23-2004, 10:04 PM

LOLOL! As if the story weren't funny enough, you had to add the sound effects! When I saw the thread, I thought...uh oh! He's making Toby Keith's song come alive!!!

Toby Keith with Willie Nelson
Beer For My Horses

Well a man come on the 6 o’clock news
Said somebody’s been shot, somebody’s been abused
Somebody blew up a building
Somebody stole a car
Somebody got away
Somebody didn’t get too far yeah
They didn’t get too far

Grandpappy told my pappy, back in my day, son
A man had to answer for the wicked that he done
Take all the rope in Texas
Find a tall oak tree, round up all of them bad boys
Hang them high in the street for all the people to see that

Justice is the one thing you should always find
You got to saddle up your boys
You got to draw a hard line
When the gun smoke settles we’ll sing a victory tune
We’ll all meet back at the local saloon
We’ll raise up our glasses against evil forces
Singing whiskey for my men, beer for my horses

We got too many gangsters doing dirty deeds
We’ve got too much corruption, too much crime in the streets
It’s time the long arm of the law put a few more in the ground
Send ’em all to their maker and he’ll settle ’em down
You can bet he’ll set ’em down ’cause

Justice is the one thing you should always find
You got to saddle up your boys
You got to draw a hard line
When the gun smoke settles we’ll sing a victory tune
We’ll all meet back at the local saloon
We’ll raise up our glasses against evil forces
Singing whiskey for my men, beer for my horses

Justice is the one thing you should always find
You got to saddle up your boys
You got to draw a hard line
When the gun smoke settles we’ll sing a victory tune
We’ll all meet back at the local saloon
We’ll raise up our glasses against evil forces
Singing whiskey for my men, beer for my horses