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View Full Version : Its official...Update #2 post 42


sdoll
07-18-2011, 10:35 PM
My husband will be losing his job. I actually feel a little relieved now that we know what is happening vs. speculating for months. So right now I am focusing on the things that really matter. We have a great family, We will be home more together, one of us will be home to tuck our boys into bed everynight, family dinner, my husband will be their for my son as he starts kindergarten in the fall. With unemploment we won't be too far behind from where we are at. (I think) we have a lot to learn because we have never been on unemployment before so we really have no idea.
Luckily I still have my job so we will keep plugging away. Scary!!

Leshaface
07-18-2011, 11:31 PM
My husband will be losing his job. I actually feel a little relieved now that we know what is happening vs. speculating for months. So right now I am focusing on the things that really matter. We have a great family, We will be home more together, one of us will be home to tuck our boys into bed everynight, family dinner, my husband will be their for my son as he starts kindergarten in the fall. With unemploment we won't be too far behind from where we are at. (I think) we have a lot to learn because we have never been on unemployment before so we really have no idea.
Luckily I still have my job so we will keep plugging away. Scary!!

I'm sorry to hear about your husbands job:hug:

But I'm so glad to hear that you're looking at the positive vs the negative. This is very inspiring. :flower3:

jsgrand0
07-19-2011, 12:15 AM
.

fireflymedic
07-19-2011, 07:31 AM
sounds like he was gone from home alot, hope he can find something that he wont have to travel so much. It hard having to be gone alot with young kids at home they change so fast and dont realy understand why dady cant be there

DebMcDonald
07-19-2011, 08:52 AM
:hug: Been where you are, but we didn't have any advance notice. It happened to my husband in February 2009 at that time he traveled for a living all over New England and I did home daycare, we immediately switched rolls and I went back to an old job that was available that offered health insurance and he stayed home with our kids while job searching. He ended up taking a job for alot less money in October of that same year. It was a long depressing time for him, but we got though. I think in the end, it actually brought us together from a family standpoint more than we were, having all that extra time with the kids made him realize what he was missing. He actually now really loves his job, but in the beginning I think he took it just to have something.

I made major changes to our financial lifestyle on day one. Canceled our newspaper delivery, decreased our phone service (canceled texting), downgraded cable, all in all I decreased our extra monthly expenses by $1400 a month, only shopped using coupons, didn't really stockpile, because that was additional money out of pocket that I didn't want to spend. I'm also embarrassed to say, but I put my kids on free lunch at the time through school and that itself was a saving of $300 a month, every little bit helps.

If you ever need an ear, please feel free to reach out. :hug:

puffkin
07-19-2011, 09:56 AM
We have been there as well except both of us lost our jobs within 2 months of each other.

We both got PT jobs immediately. It was very humbling to work retail coming from professional backgrounds but I think it made us better people in the long run. I worked evenings at Bed Bath and Beyond and he worked mornings at Target so we could always be available for DS. We could each work about 20 hours a week before our unemployment benefits were reduced so this brought in an extra $1000K a month.

I too made a chart with wants and needs for our regular monthly bills. I cancelled the paper, extra features on cable, etc. I did keep netflix and high speed internet though for job searching and for entertainment since we were home all the time.

Something else we did is take a modest amount aside for "fun" money. It was just $50/week but that was so necessary for our sanity. It allowed us to do so many things with our son that we otherwise never had the time to do while working. You would be surprised how far that $50 stretched every week and what a difference it made in our overall morale. We found so many low cost things to do in our area.

I think you are the right track. Just take a deep breath and realize that there are tons of people who are in similar spots or have been there that can help. The most important thing is to stay positive and supportive of each other during this time. It will pass :hug:

Mary•Poppins
07-19-2011, 10:01 AM
I am so sorry to hear about your husband's job loss. :hug:

You have a great attitude about it. Hope he finds a new job quickly.

princessmorgan
07-19-2011, 10:46 AM
:hug: I'm so sorry! We just went through this last month, and luckily DH was able to find a new job within the same company in a couple of weeks. It is a promotion and a job he really wanted, so it ended up being a good career move for him. You have a great attitude! Good luck!

lakelandgal70
07-19-2011, 11:04 AM
I'm sorry to hear about your husbands job:hug:

But I'm so glad to hear that you're looking at the positive vs the negative. This is very inspiring. :flower3:

Totally agree! More people need to try and have your attitude.

Shelly F - Ohio
07-19-2011, 11:16 AM
What line of work is your husband in?

What you learn from this experience will make you stronger. Come fall if your husband doesn't have a job, have him look for leaf raking jobs. We can always use an extra hand with that task!

Check to see if you qualify for food stamps. Every little bit will help.

If you don't already, now is a good time to use coupons. I manage to save $30 - $40 on every shopping trip.

kayrosek
07-19-2011, 11:18 AM
You have a marvelous attitude. The kind that will help get you through this. I was trying to tell a friend these same things just a little while back. Many years ago my husband lost a lucrative job the day before our wedding. We had three small children at home, one of whom was special needs and I was staying home to care for him. After the intial shock I chose to focus on the things you mentioned, the positives like the fact that he was home more and we had that time to make memories together. Like others have mentioned we cut back our bills but did take that time to find inexpensive things to do, both in and out of the house that gave us wonderful memories of time together while the kids were little. One of my favorite memories is of all five of us piled in mine and DH's bed watching a particular show every week. It was just the little stuff and having us all together

timmac
07-19-2011, 02:26 PM
I also want to compliment OP on the attitude and mindset going into this.

Too often on these boards I see posts about people who are having financial or life troubles of some sort, and their biggest worry seems to be what it might do to their credit rating. Understandable concerns, but completely overshadowed by the importance of keeping family healthy with a roof over their head and food to eat.

Whenever bad news hits, taking stock of what's really important, being realistic with our planning (as it seems you have done, since it was implied that you'd run some numbers already), is worth a lot.

sdoll
07-20-2011, 09:12 AM
We have been there as well except both of us lost our jobs within 2 months of each other.

We both got PT jobs immediately. It was very humbling to work retail coming from professional backgrounds but I think it made us better people in the long run. I worked evenings at Bed Bath and Beyond and he worked mornings at Target so we could always be available for DS. We could each work about 20 hours a week before our unemployment benefits were reduced so this brought in an extra $1000K a month.

I too made a chart with wants and needs for our regular monthly bills. I cancelled the paper, extra features on cable, etc. I did keep netflix and high speed internet though for job searching and for entertainment since we were home all the time.

Something else we did is take a modest amount aside for "fun" money. It was just $50/week but that was so necessary for our sanity. It allowed us to do so many things with our son that we otherwise never had the time to do while working. You would be surprised how far that $50 stretched every week and what a difference it made in our overall morale. We found so many low cost things to do in our area.

I think you are the right track. Just take a deep breath and realize that there are tons of people who are in similar spots or have been there that can help. The most important thing is to stay positive and supportive of each other during this time. It will pass :hug:

Not sure of our chances for work in retail. My husband and I are both retail managers. While we certainly would work any job (and have both worked for those specific retailers we met as managers at Bed, Bath and Beyond) I fear we are "over quilified" a word I hate in these days. But he has deifinatly put out feelers at our previous companies. We have been cutting way back for a while but we can cut more and will cut more. This just seems so unbelievable. But i know this is real!!

ilovemk76
07-20-2011, 09:31 AM
Did your husband work for Borders?

sdoll
07-20-2011, 12:44 PM
You guessed it!!!

ilovemk76
07-20-2011, 12:51 PM
You guessed it!!!

What do I win! ;)

Good luck.

klmall
07-20-2011, 01:11 PM
Just wanted to say that ever since I first read this post yesterday I have been thinking about you and your family. I am so sorry about his losing his job and even though you knew it was coming it is still an adjustment I'm sure. DH is retired and I retired, stayed home for one year and then went back to work to help cover expenses. Our DS landed a great job after graduating from college in 2008 but was downsized and has been unemployed since December 2009. He has really tried hard but not found anything and is becoming a little depressed I think! Luckily he still lived at home and had a nest egg but we can't move on until he does! This recession has really changed so many lives.

Anyway, here's hoping that DH finds some work and we are here at the DIS for you!

Aisling
07-20-2011, 05:13 PM
I hate reading posts like this, they make me so angry and depressed. It's "oh God, not another one". There's hardship everywhere I look. OP, you are my hero with your attitude. I pray that he gets another job SOON, a GREAT one.


I also want to compliment OP on the attitude and mindset going into this.

Too often on these boards I see posts about people who are having financial or life troubles of some sort, and their biggest worry seems to be what it might do to their credit rating.


I was worse! I worried about having to downgrade our cable! I disgust myself now. I never had to worry about money, but with the economy the way it is now we have to tighten our belts very much and I didn't want to let the luxuries go. I didn't even SEE them as luxuries, but as necessities! If anything, this economy (and this board) has taught me a BIG lesson in priorities and what really matters in life. We'll all get through this. :hug:

Yesterday was my DHs birthday, and instead of spending $20 on a cake, I baked one for $5 and everyone was happy!

HugsForEeyore
07-20-2011, 11:54 PM
Did your husband work for Borders?

You guessed it!!!

Just wishing the best of luck to the OP! I also work with books (I am a librarian) and it's pretty clear the ebook contributed to the demise of Borders, and will eventually kill most places that deal with with physical books. (At times, you could almost rename the Budget Board the "Nook/Kindle Board" since there are so many threads about how everyone is getting an e-reader). I suspect I will be unemployed a some point in the future as libraries and book stores become more and more obsolete.

I am saving my money now, but have no clue what other fields of work I could go into in the future, or what degrees if any I could earn that would lead to more employment. Scary world out there. No easy answers.

I do admire the OP's optimism - hope the new job comes along quickly!

njmom47
07-21-2011, 11:40 AM
:hug: To OP. DH was reduced from full-time to part-time at his job and collected partial unemployment in 2009. The best thing that came out of this situation was that he was home with the kids; ds especially benefitted from him being around more often. Thankfully, I work full-time and pay our health benefits. DH did actually find a full-time job in his field after a year or so (working 3rd shift:scared1:) and is still working part-time at his previous part-time job. It certainly does make you rethink your priorities.

disney<333
07-21-2011, 11:34 PM
I'm so sorry to hear this! I will keep you and your family in my thoughts!!:goodvibes

sdoll
07-22-2011, 11:04 PM
Just wanted to say that ever since I first read this post yesterday I have been thinking about you and your family. I am so sorry about his losing his job and even though you knew it was coming it is still an adjustment I'm sure. DH is retired and I retired, stayed home for one year and then went back to work to help cover expenses. Our DS landed a great job after graduating from college in 2008 but was downsized and has been unemployed since December 2009. He has really tried hard but not found anything and is becoming a little depressed I think! Luckily he still lived at home and had a nest egg but we can't move on until he does! This recession has really changed so many lives.

Anyway, here's hoping that DH finds some work and we are here at the DIS for you!

Your post makes me so sad for your son. I can't even imagine the struggle recent grads are having. These are not easy times. I will keep him in my thoughts these should be fun years for him not stressful. Crazy times

sdoll
07-22-2011, 11:18 PM
OP here. I just wanted to thank everyone for your support. It is so amazing how much strength you gain from complete strangers. I really appreciate it. It has been wierd week. So many people asking if we are ok. That almost makes it harder. I feel for my husbands assocaites he works in Ann Arbor where Borders started. Some of his assocaites have worked there for over 20 years. So sad.
Yesterday my boys had a scheduled well visit with their Ped. While there I realized that I needed to try and get them into every Dr. I will be able to move them to my plan at work but we had hit our deductable and wil have to start all over with my plan which is not nearly as good. So today we made eye drs appointments for the whole family. I made a bad choice though. I had our family on my insurance plan from Jan through April. We had hit our deductable in Feb. In april I moved my DH and DS's to DH's plan because the coverage was way better than mine and it covered my DS speech therepy. So it was worth it to hit the deductable on that too. Well we have to switch back and guess what? We have start the deductable over again when we switch back to mine. That seems so wrong to me. Its the same company. So we gambled and lost on that one. My youngest son has had 3 ear infections this year and had fluid in his ears when we went yesterday. We will go back in 3 weeks and see if fluid is still there. If it is we might have to do tubes. So we will be racing the clock if he needs tubes to get it on our current plan. So frustrating.

Thanks again for your support. I am so thankful for your thoughts and prayers.

nunzia
07-23-2011, 12:22 AM
You guessed it!!!

Oh..I'm so sorry...I don't know where you live but Hastings still seems to be doing OK (so far) and I tell you, management could use a good person with your DH experience. Headquarters is in Amarillo TX, but we have 155 stores (ahstings is in small markets that couldn't support a Borders or Barnes & Noble. We have books, video, music, games, lifestyles, coffee bar, etc..sale and rent and we buy used product). I work there as a second job part time and have been there 10 years..still a decent company although we've been losing alot of extras..
You have a great attitude and spirit. Hang in there.

tweedlemom
07-23-2011, 07:15 AM
:hug: My husband's company just got bought out. Some employees will stay, others will be cut. We have no idea if he will stay and have been given no timetable whatsoever. I hope my outlook can be as positive as yours, should he lose his job.

sdoll
08-01-2011, 08:58 PM
Today my husband got a new job offer. It is with a great company with opportunity for advancement. He is starting at a more entry level position and will take a pay cut. It is one we can live with and as I mentioned there is plently of room to grow. It is about 20 mins from home compared to 1hour and 15 mins so that is nice and since it is entry level he will be punching the clock for the 1st time in 15 years. So he only has to work 40 hours a week compared to the 55 hours he has been working. We feel very blessed to have this opportunity. We are both in retail management and we think it will be a nice reminder to go back and start on the front lines. By no means are we above that. I am so happy with this news and feel that we are very lucky to have it. The media has been so scary and we are in a very crippled area as far as economic recovery. I will continue my prayers for everyone else that is still searching and appreciate everyone that kept us in their thoughts!

Soben
08-01-2011, 10:00 PM
So glad to hear it!

AmandaRG
08-01-2011, 10:07 PM
Good to hear!

flateacher
08-01-2011, 10:26 PM
I was reading through the posts and was so happy to see that the last post said that your husband had a job offer and will start his new job! :) I am relieved for you (and at the same time admiring your great attitude!)

We went through the same thing 2 1/2 almost 3 years ago. My husband was laid off (no warning ) :confused3

We had to survive off of my teachers salary and his unemployment. He was making WAY more than me - so the cut in pay was an adjustment. But like you and others have said we have other things to be thankful for. And some of the best memories are of those times when we were making our own movie nights! :)

(I also read the post about the insurance and all - so sorry to hear that. It really is unfair that you end up hitting the limit twice! Happened to us too!) :sad1: I can say we ended up looking into independent insurance and it was cheaper than with the school! go figure!

travelbug
08-01-2011, 10:31 PM
Great news about the new job! Best wishes to you and your DH. :)

java
08-01-2011, 10:33 PM
So good to read. It gives me hope.

ThisIsTheYear
08-01-2011, 11:01 PM
Today my husband got a new job offer. It is with a great company with opportunity for advancement. He is starting at a more entry level position and will take a pay cut. It is one we can live with and as I mentioned there is plently of room to grow. It is about 20 mins from home compared to 1hour and 15 mins so that is nice and since it is entry level he will be punching the clock for the 1st time in 15 years. So he only has to work 40 hours a week compared to the 55 hours he has been working. We feel very blessed to have this opportunity. We are both in retail management and we think it will be a nice reminder to go back and start on the front lines. By no means are we above that. I am so happy with this news and feel that we are very lucky to have it. The media has been so scary and we are in a very crippled area as far as economic recovery. I will continue my prayers for everyone else that is still searching and appreciate everyone that kept us in their thoughts!

That's great news! The best of luck! :woohoo:

Leshaface
08-01-2011, 11:13 PM
Awesome! :woohoo:

bumbershoot
08-02-2011, 12:12 AM
Congratulations!

ilovemk76
08-02-2011, 07:35 AM
This is good news!

So many want their same pay and job and as a result miss a great opportunity.

nunzia
08-02-2011, 07:59 AM
Great news!! :)

Gr8t Fan
08-02-2011, 10:53 AM
Awesome news!!!!

njmom47
08-02-2011, 02:04 PM
Good to hear (except the insurance part, grrr).

Hardy
08-02-2011, 03:38 PM
So sorry for your dh's job loss....it sounds like you've gotten great news though!

Just wanted to share that my husband is a retail manager as well, and was previously working for Circuit City, when it became clear things were not going well there, he had to leave and went to another company, taking a significant pay cut. Now a few years later he has worked his way up to store manager and is making more than ever. CC closing was a sad time, but it all really worked out for the best as he was able to grow more within this company. Best of luck to your family!

BTW - my dh works for a borders competitor and would happily hire on great borders employees, but we do not have any borders stores in our area. I hope everyone affected can find replacement jobs quickly.

Kimber
08-02-2011, 06:58 PM
My husband has been out of work for over two years and just got a job as well starting Monday! Less money and crazy hours but we are handful to have it. My job was enough to keep us going without too much hard ship' but like everyone else said it puts into perspective what really matters. Best wishes to all still job hunting.

Aisling
08-03-2011, 01:37 AM
Very good news!!!!!!!!!

sdoll
08-16-2011, 11:16 PM
I can't believe I am writing this..... But today my husband received another job offer. It's an amazing offer with a great company!! And it is.... are you ready a 30% increase. I can't even begin to explain how good it feels to write this. The money is amazing but honestly the confidence my husband feels about himself is worth more than anything else. It is nice to be wanted. Just when you think the door closes another one opens. We are very blessed today. The best part there is no gap in employment. I will continue to pray for everyone that is still searching. Don't give up!!

bumbershoot
08-16-2011, 11:33 PM
...the confidence my husband feels about himself is worth more than anything else.

It really is, isn't it? Congrats to him (even if he doesn't take the new offer)!

travelbug
08-17-2011, 05:57 AM
I can't believe I am writing this..... But today my husband received another job offer. It's an amazing offer with a great company!! And it is.... are you ready a 30% increase. I can't even begin to explain how good it feels to write this. The money is amazing but honestly the confidence my husband feels about himself is worth more than anything else. It is nice to be wanted. Just when you think the door closes another one opens. We are very blessed today. The best part there is no gap in employment. I will continue to pray for everyone that is still searching. Don't give up!!That is wonderful news! Thanks for sharing it with us. :yay:

JoiseyMom
08-17-2011, 11:16 AM
Congrats!

TRICKY_TINK
08-17-2011, 12:20 PM
Whoohoo....awesome! A thousand pounds off your shoulders....must feel great! Congrats :)

bettymae1121
08-17-2011, 12:28 PM
I can't believe I am writing this..... But today my husband received another job offer. It's an amazing offer with a great company!! And it is.... are you ready a 30% increase. I can't even begin to explain how good it feels to write this. The money is amazing but honestly the confidence my husband feels about himself is worth more than anything else. It is nice to be wanted. Just when you think the door closes another one opens. We are very blessed today. The best part there is no gap in employment. I will continue to pray for everyone that is still searching. Don't give up!!

That is SO awesome!!!! Congrats!!!! :yay:

Leshaface
08-17-2011, 02:06 PM
I can't believe I am writing this..... But today my husband received another job offer. It's an amazing offer with a great company!! And it is.... are you ready a 30% increase. I can't even begin to explain how good it feels to write this. The money is amazing but honestly the confidence my husband feels about himself is worth more than anything else. It is nice to be wanted. Just when you think the door closes another one opens. We are very blessed today. The best part there is no gap in employment. I will continue to pray for everyone that is still searching. Don't give up!!

This is GREAT! I'm very happy for you guys :goodvibes