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Deb in IA
07-13-2011, 11:33 AM
OK, I know this has the potential of becoming argumentative, so I really hope we can keep it civil.

I'm interested in whether parents impose any type of "curfew" on their teens on the cruise. Not necessarily what the DCL does.

While I want our kids to have their freedom and to be able to have a good time on their own, and make friends, I also don't want them to be up all night long and sleep away the entire day.

Now, both our kids are pretty good kids. Not big into the party scene, don't drink and don't want to drink, don't smoke, etc. DS is 16, DD is 20. DS is more outgoing and adventurous, DD is more reserved and shy.

I was thinking of requesting that they be back in our stateroom by 1 am, and by midnight on the nights before we go to Castaway Cay, because they want to run the 5K early in the morning.

What do you think? Is that reasonable?

smootenloopers
07-13-2011, 12:08 PM
OK, I know this has the potential of becoming argumentative, so I really hope we can keep it civil.

I'm interested in whether parents impose any type of "curfew" on their teens on the cruise. Not necessarily what the DCL does.

While I want our kids to have their freedom and to be able to have a good time on their own, and make friends, I also don't want them to be up all night long and sleep away the entire day.

Now, both our kids are pretty good kids. Not big into the party scene, don't drink and don't want to drink, don't smoke, etc. DS is 16, DD is 20. DS is more outgoing and adventurous, DD is more reserved and shy.

I was thinking of requesting that they be back in our stateroom by 1 am, and by midnight on the nights before we go to Castaway Cay, because they want to run the 5K early in the morning.

What do you think? Is that reasonable?

I think it is completely resonable for you to be a responsible parent. :) I'm assuming you have paid for the cruise for both children. My father always used to say, "my house, my rules" and that we were welcome to make our own rules when we were on our own. Seems it ought to apply here, too.

Perhaps you could give some lessons to the parents out there that let their children do whatever they want, whenever they want.

Angelic Jennifer
07-13-2011, 12:53 PM
At 20, that seems a little early ... Not so much for the 16 year old. I would think the older one should be able to regulate herself (if she wants to run the 5k, she's old enough to get herself up and get there on time - surely you don't also keep her on task for college/work?).

Regardless of what anyone thinks, you're paying, and you're the parent. You make the decisions that are right for your family.

MrsScooby
07-13-2011, 01:19 PM
At 20, that seems a little early ... Not so much for the 16 year old. I would think the older one should be able to regulate herself (if she wants to run the 5k, she's old enough to get herself up and get there on time - surely you don't also keep her on task for college/work?).

Regardless of what anyone thinks, you're paying, and you're the parent. You make the decisions that are right for your family.

Ditto:thumbsup2

We told our DS17 he had to be in as soon as the teen club closed. No wandering around the ship allowed. No problems :goodvibes

We wouldn't let him sleep in too late because it interfered with the work of the stateroom host. The benefit of having natural light was that often all we had to do was open up the curtains to get him up in the morning:rolleyes1
Sometimes we'd bring in some breakfast (pastries, fruit and orange juice) and having some food there helped wake him up as well.

He was usually up between 9 and 10 in the morning:confused3

Deb in IA
07-13-2011, 03:03 PM
Ditto:thumbsup2

We told our DS17 he had to be in as soon as the teen club closed. No wandering around the ship allowed. No problems :goodvibes

We wouldn't let him sleep in too late because it interfered with the work of the stateroom host. The benefit of having natural light was that often all we had to do was open up the curtains to get him up in the morning:rolleyes1
Sometimes we'd bring in some breakfast (pastries, fruit and orange juice) and having some food there helped wake him up as well.

He was usually up between 9 and 10 in the morning:confused3

I should add that our DS could probably sleep through a tsunami. Getting him up in the mornings is like pulling a rabbit out of a hole. The light is not going to do it, and he doesn't usually eat breakfast. He could easily sleep to 2 pm if allowed. :rolleyes:

MinnesotaMouseketeers
07-13-2011, 03:08 PM
When my DS brought a friend along we made the rule: If you are not up in time when our room attendant comes through to make up the room, you two are in charge of making it up "perfectly" along with towel animals :lmao::rotfl:

Actually they are great kids and latest they came back into the stateroom was around 1:00 am when they went to a movie.

I don't think it's is wrong to set rules :thumbsup2

Deb in IA
07-13-2011, 03:20 PM
When my DS brought a friend along we made the rule: If you are not up in time when our room attendant comes through to make up the room, you two are in charge of making it up "perfectly" along with towel animals :lmao::rotfl:

Actually they are great kids and latest they came back into the stateroom was around 1:00 am when they went to a movie.

I don't think it's is wrong to set rules :thumbsup2

LOL!!!!

Thanks. I was just trying to see what some "other kids" do, so that our expectations are not way out of line with everyone else.

never2muchdisney
07-13-2011, 04:00 PM
Now, both our kids are pretty good kids. Not big into the party scene, don't drink and don't want to drink, don't smoke, etc. DS is 16, DD is 20. DS is more outgoing and adventurous, DD is more reserved and shy.

I was thinking of requesting that they be back in our stateroom by 1 am, and by midnight on the nights before we go to Castaway Cay, because they want to run the 5K early in the morning.

What do you think? Is that reasonable?

I qualify for a “senior” discount in some restaurants, so this opinion is coming from an old lady.

Your 16 year old is still a kid and should have a curfew as well as check-in with you several times daily. :crazy:

Your 20 year old is an adult and at this point in her life, she should be taking responsibility for herself, like adults do. Especially since the recognized adult age on the ship is 18 years old.

Does it matter who pays for the cruise? If my kids pay for my cruise, do they have the right to determine when this old lady should be in bed? Nah, I would be grateful for the ticket aboard, but as an adult, I can decide what time to stop hanging out in the adult section on the ship. :woohoo: It's vacation! Let's Dance!

MrsScooby
07-13-2011, 04:25 PM
I should add that our DS could probably sleep through a tsunami. Getting him up in the mornings is like pulling a rabbit out of a hole. The light is not going to do it, and he doesn't usually eat breakfast. He could easily sleep to 2 pm if allowed. :rolleyes:

:rotfl: Mine is very much like that at home. During the school year he has to be up at 6:00 am to catch the school bus and swears he can't get to sleep before midnight:rolleyes: Often refuses breakfast as well.

On our recent cruises he has been easier to get up:confused3

On our 2008 cruise we did have some issues with him sleeping late (he was 14 at the time), but 2010 and 2011 cruises he has been waking up easier:confused3

At 16 he is young enough to set guidelines, but like previous posters have noted, sleeping in is a part of vacation fun too...it just doesn't have to mean sleeping in the whole morning.

Good luck:thumbsup2

sftnslky
07-13-2011, 05:46 PM
Ditto:thumbsup2

We told our DS17 he had to be in as soon as the teen club closed. No wandering around the ship allowed. No problems :goodvibes

Ditto, as soon as the clubs closed they had 15 minutes to be back in the room. Gave them the 15 so they could run up and grab some hot chocolate and a pizza slice :rotfl: Our twin boys had to be in by 10...and most nights they didn't even make it that long. On our next cruise they will be 11 and we will still say 10Pm, but I have a feeling they will be pushing it right up till 9:59 and 59 seconds :rotfl::rotfl:

cyclenut
07-13-2011, 06:07 PM
We're not imposing any such curfews on our kids, but it might not be a bad idea to at least *suggest* some reasonable times given the shore excursions we have planned. It is not at all unreasonable for us to go over their plans with them and suggest a time that they get back to their stateroom based on the schedule.

We have DD-22, DS-20, DD-18, DD-16.

We chose to have our own room. We couldn't get a single room for 6 anyway, so they won't be bothering is when they come in and we won't even know about it since they are on deck 1 and we are on deck 6.

In your case, you can also tell them that the reason for the curfew is that they will be coming into your stateroom and you don't want to be disturbed.

insureman
07-13-2011, 06:38 PM
Our daughters, 14 and 15 could stay at the teen club until closing however they had to call my wave phone at closing and I would meet them outside of the club and escort them back to the stateroom. I really didn't want them walking from forward to aft by themselves at 2AM, a little protective maybe but I have no idea who is roaming the ship at that time. The link below has been posted before but it is just a reminder that you don't know who is on board the ships.

http://news.travel.aol.com/2010/09/27/man-pleads-guilty-to-sexually-assaulting-girl-on-disney-ship/

MDTerp
07-13-2011, 07:01 PM
Our DD will be 14 on our Med cruise next week. On past cruises, we gave her a curfew - usually between 12 & 1 am. This time because the trip is sooo port intensive and we need to be off the ship early, it will probably be earlier on nights before port calls (most of them) :goodvibes

She's always been responsible and we've always met her "new" friends that she meets and hangs out with.

skoi
07-13-2011, 09:08 PM
For our now 17 yo dd the rule has been, since about 14, come back to the room as soon as the club closed. Same for ds now 13, from the time he was about 11. They had to wake us up when they returned, because with 6 of us, we need connecting rooms.

Ds is an early riser, dd not so much. But dd didn't want to "sleep all day and waste time" so she asked to be woken up for breakfast, by 8 at the latest. So even though we set a late curfew, we were all passed out by 11 on most nights. :lmao:

wilma-bride
07-14-2011, 06:42 AM
My DDs were 15 and 16 the last time we cruised. They had their own room (next to ours). We didn't actually impose any rules as far as coming back to the room but I made it clear that they weren't to go wandering around the ship late at night. We were only on a 3-night cruise and all three nights they were back in the room by 1am (pretty much as soon as the teen club closed).

On pirate night, the younger one was feeling unwell so chose to hang with us instead of going to the teen club. That night, the older girl came back early to check on her sister, who was feeling better so they went up to the club for the final hour together, then came straight back.

I think it's nice for them to have some freedom but I don't think teens should be roaming the ship late at night/in the early hours of the morning. As far as I'm concerned, if the clubs are closed, they should be in their rooms (unless they are somewhere with their parents, of course).

bigmama101
07-15-2011, 03:14 PM
We will be crusing again this summer and yes my DD15 will have a curfew as well as having to check in with us during the day. (on port days we will be together) The rules do not change just because we are on vacation. As for DD18 and off to college in the fall will be reminded of being responsible and to keep her self safe, as well as a suggested time of being in her cabin. I tell my kids nothing good happens after midnight.:lmao:

TXDCLfan
07-15-2011, 03:51 PM
We will be crusing again this summer and yes my DD15 will have a curfew as well as having to check in with us during the day. (on port days we will be together) The rules do not change just because we are on vacation. As for DD18 and off to college in the fall will be reminded of being responsible and to keep her self safe, as well as a suggested time of being in her cabin. I tell my kids nothing good happens after midnight.:lmao:

:thumbsup2:thumbsup2

rlgoodin
07-15-2011, 04:03 PM
We've been on a couple of cruises and have a 15 year old boy. We'll be going on another 7 night in September and pretty much let him go where he pleases, but he always stays out of trouble and makes it back before midnight.

I think as it gets late, the places all start emptying out and there is much less to do which promotes the teens going to sleep earlier. I guess it really just depends on how responsible the teen in question is.

Deb in IA
07-15-2011, 05:35 PM
Thanks to all who have responded!

So, I will tell 16 yo that a midnight curfew is NOT out of the norm, and that many other families do something similar.

(That way, I'm not the mean mom with unrealistic expections, you see . . . ;))

skoi
07-15-2011, 05:36 PM
We've been on a couple of cruises and have a 15 year old boy. We'll be going on another 7 night in September and pretty much let him go where he pleases, but he always stays out of trouble and makes it back before midnight.

I think as it gets late, the places all start emptying out and there is much less to do which promotes the teens going to sleep earlier. I guess it really just depends on how responsible the teen in question is.

Now I haven't seen this. In fact, on our last few cruises, dd said the other teens stayed out long after the club closed, moving from place to place on the ship and hanging out. They didn't understand why she didn't go with them. They would show back up after lunch, saying they had just woken up. Maybe it's just the groups we've cruised with. :confused3

Deb in IA
07-15-2011, 05:56 PM
Now I haven't seen this. In fact, on our last few cruises, dd said the other teens stayed out long after the club closed, moving from place to place on the ship and hanging out. They didn't understand why she didn't go with them. They would show back up after lunch, saying they had just woken up. Maybe it's just the groups we've cruised with. :confused3

See, to me, that is not acceptable behavior - at least, not for us.

DMMarla07860
07-15-2011, 06:42 PM
Now I haven't seen this. In fact, on our last few cruises, dd said the other teens stayed out long after the club closed, moving from place to place on the ship and hanging out. They didn't understand why she didn't go with them. They would show back up after lunch, saying they had just woken up. Maybe it's just the groups we've cruised with. :confused3
I'm not a teen anymore, but as a teen in 2002 and 2005 when I cruised I saw this happen, and I did it myself. From the time I was 18 in 2006 I got to go to the college club and every cruise since then I've been hanging out with people I have met till 3:00am at the latest and we go from place to place and we have seen other teens go from place to place, in March 2010 it was the worst one for teens staying out late

tomspixie
07-17-2011, 03:39 PM
Our Disney teens have a 2AM curfew. 2 are in college, and the other 2 are 15 and 17. They have been on so many cruises that they don't do much in the teen club. They love their karaoke and basketball. The crew often play basketball late after their shifts...my kids LOVE getting to challenge them.
They are respectful kids...but do like having fun. They would like to stay out later--to do nothing, or play ball, but they realize we aren't asking much by having them return to their cabin.:)