I think I will stop dating for a while...

[WebmasterBarry]

The last date broke the camel on the straw's back. The person wrote a few e-mails and never did again. :( This always happens to me. They seem to be interested, but after a few e-mails or phone calls, I get no replies. I tried to do follow-up "How have you been?" messages, but no replies to those either.

So I've decided to temporarily retire from dating. I think I've been trying too hard. I've used the personals and failed miserably. I tried to meet people in person, but no luck at that. I even had an interest towards some people here, but no luck either.

I won't be working so hard to find someone. If someone does come along and it's right, I might date again. For right now, though, it's time to concentrate on me. Maybe I ought to spend more time on roller coasters. At least we both will love each other.

[browneyes]

:( How sad. Maybe you'll meet your dream lady tomorrow. Good luck.

[olena]

Poor Barry......*HUGS*

[TigerBear]

Trying too hard never helps. I bet you will meet her one day - here's to hoping its sooner and not later. :D

[vickyBaby]

Awww Barry. You are such a sweetie. The right girl is out there. Don't try so hard and you will find her or she will find you :)

[A kid at heart]

That song keeps running thru my head, Looking for love in all the wrong places, looking for love in too many places...........

[JasonLyons]

women are bad, thats when there really good ;)

[Saffron]

Uh oh Barry! As soon as you take time for yourself, as soon as you start doing the things you want to do, as soon as you start planning things that don't include someone, as soon as the last thing on your mind is dating ................ you'll meet her! LOL!! That's what seems to happen!! :)

[WDWHound]

I know what you are feeling. Your dating life sounds like most of my dating life. I wasn't looking when I found my wife. We were both working a haunted house when we met. It took me completely off gaurd becuase I had given up on looking for a date. One day earlier I would have told you there was no one out there for me.

The standard advice (and I know I got very sick of hearing it) is true. Relax, be yourself and try not to try too hard. I know its hard to beleive today, but it really could all change tomorrow.

[Dan Murphy]

Just letting you know I wish you my best, buddy. Don't give up. Looking forward to seeing you in December, Barry.

[Mickey's sunshine]

Aww, I am sorry Barry. Like the others say, dont give up your lady is out there. One day you will find her, and yes I hope that it will be soon. Just go out and have some fun, you will find her when you least expect it. :) Good luck. {{hugs}} You can always hang out with us crazy Tampa girls till you find the right one. Wait, we are all coaster chickens. Maybe that is not such a good idea.

[Disney Doll]

Barry, I met my DH when I was absolutely NOT looking!!!!! I had been through a difficult relationship with a guy and we had broken up about a year prior to my meeting DH. That whole year, I hung out with my friends, travelled and did what I wanted to do. A friend had DH and I over, I was just looking for a fun evening, and here we are 14 years later(11 of them married!). Make your life, and someone will join you in it when the time is right.

[A kid at heart]

Have you checked to make sure that you're doing things right? Like showering before the date? Using a good deoderant, brushing your teeth? Not putting on too much of that cologne? If you're not doing these things, that can turn a woman off ya know!
LOL

[EROS]

Barry, my sources tell me that HEIDI is going to be coming through Florida soon. She LOVES fast rollercoasters and a slooooooooooow touch;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ........

http://members.v3space.com/wildwill/heidi_klum/hk2.jpg

[shep]

OMG...EROS posted a fully clothed woman..:eek:
Maybe this is a sign Barry..:)

[JohnTBap]

LOL WAGS!!!! :):):):)

[catsrule]

It will happen when you least expect it.

[TIGGERSMOM]

Baryy - Someday your princess will come.

Hang in there. Enjoy your friends and relax. Right when you least expect it there she will be.

[Boo'sMom]

Hang in there Barry...when you're not looking....POWWWWWWW

[Jeff in BigD]

Barry - I believe you may have the wrong MO when it comes to dealing with women. At the end of the date give them the standard line of "I had a great time & I'll call them." Don't call for a 7-10 days. They'll be iritated that you haven't called before, yet intrigued that you aren't falling all over yourself for them.

Calling the very next day or two seems a little needy or clingy & that's never a good thing. I'm not saying to be rude or aloof, but don't let them think that they're the primary focus of your life. This is important for 2 reasons: 1 - it lets them know right off the bat that you have a sense of self-worth & won't be taken advantage of or walked all over; 2 - if things don't work out they won't think you'll be so upset that you'll do a swan dive off of the nearest sky scraper.

I went through a period of non-dating & while I did have more energy to focus on creative things & learned a lot about myself, I was also very lonely. Monks could use that time in my life as a model & there were more then a few opprotunities I missed because I was totally out of the looking mindset & was oblivious. While I do think it's a good idea to not constantly think about it or go to every place looking for "the one", it's still important to keep your eyes open - just in case. :)

[Cindy B]

Barry.. poor guy...


It will happen, truly it will.

I had no idea when I was doing cast stuff for Rocky Horror, that I would meet my husband... I was just busy hanging out with friends, and doing my thing.. and well 11 years later, you know..


But I do have to disagree with Jeff's not calling advice. I personally liked a phone call a day or two later. The aloofness made me MAD! It comes across as selfish, but again thats from a womans perspective.


Be yourself Barry! Thats all, don't worry, and it will come.

[vickyBaby]

Originally posted by Jeff in BigD
At the end of the date give them the standard line of "I had a great time & I'll call them." Don't call for a 7-10 days. They'll be iritated that you haven't called before, yet intrigued that you aren't falling all over yourself for them.


Ummm, Jeff, 7 to 10 days??? They'll be "irritated" is putting it lightly (and, might find someone else to date because the first date was not showing interest). I understand the "Hard To Get" play and waiting a few days, but don't get yourself "Kicked To The Curb."

Ugh, I hate head games.

[vickyBaby]

Originally posted by Cindy B
I had no idea when I was doing cast stuff for Rocky Horror,

It's astounding;
Time is fleeting;
Madness takes its toll...

(Vicky hijacks the thread)

[Cindy B]

LOL Vicky!

Yes, a former Magenta/Janet/and other things speaks...

Seriously though, there were two couples that I am aware of that met at the show and got married. My other friends kept on saying "I've got to go"

[Jeff in BigD]

Originally posted by Cindy B
But I do have to disagree with Jeff's not calling advice. I personally liked a phone call a day or two later. The aloofness made me MAD! It comes across as selfish, but again thats from a womans perspective.
Like I said, he shouldn't be aloof. It just seems his current MO wasn't working out for him & I was suggesting another he might want to try.

[luvdsny]

Barry, here is some advice...........Speak Louder! She probably just got tired of you not saying anything....when in fact, she just couldn't hear you. ;) :p Oh, and don't take unflattering pictures of her (and especially don't post them on any boards ;) ) but do say 'nice' and 'complimentary' things...Oh, and you have to mean them. ;) Okay, now you're armed with the good stuff! ;)

[Cindy B]

Tia... too funny about the pictures comment...

I'm sure with his next movie there will be doozies of me in them...

[Jeff in BigD]

Originally posted by vickylan
Ummm, Jeff, 7 to 10 days??? They'll be "irritated" is putting it lightly (and, might find someone else to date because the first date was not showing interest). I understand the "Hard To Get" play and waiting a few days, but don't get yourself "Kicked To The Curb."

Ugh, I hate head games.
Ok maybe 7-10 is extreme (you don't want them to forget your name), but I know plenty of guys who call the very next morning or even worse, later that night. I agree that head games suck. I don't think waiting a few days is playing head games though. Acting completely interested, then completely disinterested & back & forth are head games.

[Cindy B]

Yes, 1-2 days is acceptable for a call back in my book. The same night, that is well, a bit much..

And a card goes a long way. I've seen many guys in our church do that, write a small card saying how much they enjoyed the date, etc... and the women go CRAZY over that.

[Tony-NJ]

I agree with the others who say you will meet that special someone when you least expect it. That's how it happened for me. And so many others I know.

Good luck! ;)

[figmentvi]

Yup Barry....dating is like my golf swing. Try too hard and you don't get anywhere.

Hang in there........your perfect match is out there.

[Serena]

Be yourself, Barry. :D

[helenabear]

Aww Barry... I think what most said was good advice. Don't try too hard and relax because when you least expect it is when the right one comes along (that's what happened with my DH and I). And of course just be yourself. I am sure your right lady will come along soon!

[TigH]

Good luck! Dating sucks! I met my husband the day after I declared that I wasn't going to date losers anymore. I also made a list of all the qualities I wanted in a person (and some that I didn't want). It was a miracle!!! :D

Take some time off, be good to yourself, live your life HAPPILY as a single person and when you least expect it, a new friend will arrive in your life and you'll both fall in love. Yep! It's true!!!

P.S. Just read some of the other respones. Don't listen to Jeff. If you like someone and you think they like you, then CALL! Playing games is immature and could ruin things. Just be yourself!

[Mamu]

Barry while I have never entered the world of dating. Got married right out of Highschool. I have many single friends. I hear the same thing from them.

I can only say someday the right person will walk into your life. Probably when you least expect it. I have a friend who is in his forties and had given up on dating. This past year a woman has become a very important part of his life. He wasn't looking it's something that happened.

Barry Mrs Right is out there, somewhere.

[WebmasterBarry]

Thanks for the kind words. All I feel is hate now, but I think it will soon pass.

I feel foolish for falling for a DIS'er (who shall remain nameless). It was a big mistake. :(

[browneyes]

Tis better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.

We're all only human, Barry. I'm sorry you got hurt by whomever. I hope you get to feeling better soon.

[TigerBear]

Barry, believe me, everyone feels foolish at one time or another when it comes to dating. Don't let it get you down. Learn from it and move on. You obviously have a lot to offer a woman. It just needs to be the right woman. When it is, you will know and she will know.

[WillyJ]

Now c'mon buddy; there's no need to feel so down on yourself or anyone else. . . dating is like hitting the casinos- you're going to pick the wrong game and end up losing almost everytime, but when you're finally at the right place at the right time and you hit the jackpot, you're set for life. . :) :) :)

I'm no longer looking myself, so I can give you one of my best pick-up lines. . . ;)

Dress nice, walk into a bar, whip off your sun glasses, then look around and say in a loud voice; "Man, I haven't been in this joint since I won the lottery. . . "

Trust me bro; you'll get plenty of attention. . . ;) :teeth:

[Buckalew]

Barry,
I'm sorry that you are feeling mad and sad. I'm sorry that you were hurt or that you feel like a fool because of an experience here. But remember, you always have me to make yourself feel like less of a fool. I mean, how many times have I played the fool right here on these boards??LOL

I hate the ol' saying about trying to hard etc. but, alas, tis true. I am sure you are a great person with a lot to offer someone deserving of your love. Remember, the good Lord knows who she is!! (well, what did you expect to hear from me? ;) )

{{{hugs}}} and good luck!

[Jeff in BigD]

Originally posted by WillyJ
Dress nice, walk into a bar, whip off your sun glasses, then look around and say in a loud voice; "Man, I haven't been in this joint since I won the lottery. . . "

Trust me bro; you'll get plenty of attention. . . ;) :teeth:
I think I might use that one myself. :)

[Pooh93]

You will find the right person and look back and all of this and think "why was I so worried?" I could tell you some things I did when I was single that were really foolish, but there were so many of them, they'd probably shut me down for having too long of a post!;) Don't be too hard on yourself and keep on posting right here! Don't ever apologize for being yourself! There are alot of nice, young gentlemen here and you are one of them!:)

[marlasmom]

Oh Barry = we'll be living in Florida in 3 weeks. And - I have a daughter------

[Krisu]

Just go on with your life and concentrate on doing what you like to do. Important to find someone with similar interests. It's always when you least expect it. It could be someone you already know but never thought of asking out!

[WebmasterBarry]

Originally posted by marlasmom
Oh Barry = we'll be living in Florida in 3 weeks. And - I have a daughter------

I really shouldn't, but is she over 18? Does she like roller coasters and would travel around the country to ride them?

:jester:

Well, on another subject, if the unnamed DIS'er appears at DIS Con II, I may have to stand on the other side of the room.

[J&D]

Barry-
I received this e-mail after reading your thread, and I thought of you.

1. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.

2. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

3. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.

4. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them.

5. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.

6. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.

7. Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.

8. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.

9. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.

10. There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next time around.

11. Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you.

12. Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.

:D

[abaldacci]

STOP LOOKING AND YOU'LL TRIP RIGHT OVER HER.

[WebmasterBarry]

Thanks for the replies. I think my heart has been bruised enough that I need a break.

BTW, do you ever get feelings to go back to an ex? Just curious...

[SonjaB]

Barry, the others are right. Take care of Barry for awhile, do nice things for yourself, get involved in something you're interested in, expand your personal horizons and when you're not looking for her......there she'll be. You're such a nice guy, generous, sweet......you have a lot to offer, the timing just isn't right yet. She's out there making her way to you, give her time to arrive. I promise it will be worth the wait. :)

[A kid at heart]

BTW, do you ever get feelings to go back to an ex? Just curious...


__________________

I do.

[#1 Disney Fan]

{{{Hugs}}} Barry. :( So sorry things are looking glum for you right now. You're a good person... keep smiling. I really like the quote that J&D posted... "Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile." :)

Take care of yourself. I'm in a similar spot tp you, single and lonely, so I know how that feels. It stinks. Big time. So being in a similar spot I don't have too much advice for you, but hang in there Barry, you'll get through this. And easier said than done, but try not to worry about it. I'm sure one day in the (hopefully not so far off) future you'll be posting that you feel like the happiest guy on earth. :) :) :)

For your question "BTW, do you ever get feelings to go back to an ex?" I can take that two ways. Do you mean "do you ever have feelings to go back to an ex that you broke up with" or "do you ever have feelings to go back to an ex that broke up with you?" For the second question (an ex that broke up with you), yes I absolutely 100% have feelings to get back together again. More than you could imagine at times. Since he broke up with me though, that's not really my call, but yes, the feelings are so there.

As hard as it is, try to be happy Barry. Hang out with friends, do things by yourself for you, whatever it is that makes you smile.

Another {hug}.

[Cindy B]

Barry, it will work out, when you least expect it..

As for ex, well, hard to say.
It all depends on the ex, and how the relationship was.
Did it end friendly? Do you still talk?

Think long and hard about ex's, I've done that, and it was sad because we were friends, and then became "weirded" out after dating again...

[Poohbear123]

Don't feel bad, my 19 year old DS has just ended a relationship of 2 years.:( He even left home, got an Apartment and has been living with her for 5 months. However, when his money ran out, and she had to get a job, all of a sudden she met "someone else" and doesn't want to live with him anymore.:mad: Now he is stuck with an Apt. he doesn't really like, but has to stay there another 7 months, as that is when the lease is up.:rolleyes: He said the same thing you said: "He's giving up on women for awhile." I will be at Dis Con and I will be glad to stand on the same side of the room with you!;)

[ugadog99]

With my bad experience (two abusive drunks:( ), I doubt I will EVER date again. I would love to have a good friend to spend time with and someone to talk to. However, I have given up finding the "right" person. So, no dates here, either!