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View Full Version : 8 Graduations and 2 Confirmations...what to do?


nilseks
04-08-2010, 02:26 PM
I need some input. DH is one of 5 kids; there are 19 neices and nephews on his side. Between all of those kids, there are 8 graduations (some from grade school, 2 from high school, 2 from college) and 2 Confirmations this year. Usually we have 2 or 3 of these events going on each year, but not TEN! And they are all within 1 month of one another. Normally I give $50 for graduations (which honestly, I don't feel like that is enough for a college graduation gift) but I can't afford to pony up $500 for all of these events.

I wish I could come up with some meaningful gift ideas that would be cherished AND help me save money. Or at least come up with some kind of alternative to shelling out all this cash.

Any thoughts/tips would be greatly appreciated.

andrews_dad
04-08-2010, 02:59 PM
Tip: Take out a 2nd mortgage! :rotfl:

clori
04-08-2010, 03:03 PM
Do you really need to give cash for a grade school graduation? Do you live close enough that you could do a cheaper activity with the younger kids rather than give money? For confirmation is there a special religious gift you could give that would cost less?

sksjasams
04-08-2010, 03:06 PM
I wouldn't think a gift for grade school graduation would be necessary - just a nice card, and maybe a small i-tunes gift card if you really wanted to give a gift.

I think the trouble you are going to run into is changing the gifts you give mid-stream in a family. If you have always given each child a standard monetary amount, it will be hard not to do the same for other kids, especially one's in the same family.

I would start setting aside $100/month now so that you won't have to come up with all of it at once.

mrsklamc
04-08-2010, 03:07 PM
I wouldn't think a gift for grade school graduation would be necessary - just a nice card, and maybe a small i-tunes gift card if you really wanted to give a gift.

I think the trouble you are going to run into is changing the gifts you give mid-stream in a family. If you have always given each child a standard monetary amount, it will be hard not to do the same for other kids, especially one's in the same family.


This. both things.

monorailsilver
04-08-2010, 03:09 PM
Well....

For the grade school ones, I wouldn't expect much if anything as a parent for my kids. Can you give them $25 saving's bonds? Or heck an itunes gc or some other gc. I would not spend much more then $15-$20 even if they are family. And that might be even more then I would want to spend.

The HS ones I would give the $50 or a $50 saving's bond.

And the college ones, maybe a bit more or a pen or something that has to do with their major which may be cheaper then just giving $$$.

Confirmations, hmm...savings bond...notice my trend?

ceecee
04-08-2010, 04:04 PM
No grade school gift...also I certainly didn't get any gifts for graduation from college either. As for confirmations we are protestant and don't do that.

scooterpig
04-08-2010, 04:14 PM
Grade schoolers get cash graduation gifts? Sheeesh, I'm living in the wrong neighborhood! :rotfl2:

englishteacha
04-08-2010, 04:22 PM
I am the youngest of 8 sibilngs. I have over 20 nieces and nephews. There's no way I can give expensive gifts! Next summer we have 3 high school graduations, my own Graduate School graduation, and 2 weddings. Thank goodness we don't do anything for grade school graduations, 8th grade graduations, etc.

For confirmation (I am also protestant, but confirmation is kind of a big deal in our family, protestant or not), I received a lovely silver necklace. I know it wasn't particularly expensive but it meant a lot to me and I wore it all through high school (I was confirmed at the end of 8th grade). If it's a girl being confirmed, I'd get her pretty earrings or a necklace. For a guy, maybe a new wallet?

I say give frugal gifts for confirmation, a card for the little ones with grade school graduations (maybe a McD's gift card for their own Happy Meal?), and $25-50 for the high school/college grads.

Piecey
04-08-2010, 04:33 PM
I think I'd ask if the grade school kids had college savings plans... if they did, I'd ask for the info to make a deposit and let the parents know I'd do it before the end of the year (thus allowing more time for me to come up with the funds to do so). I'd give the kid a card and go on with my life.

nilseks
04-08-2010, 04:37 PM
Thanks for all the input!

I should clarify that when I say 'grade school', I mean 8th grade. I do not spend as much on those events but there has been a precedent set in our family and it's hard not to follow it. The frustrating thing is, my kids are the youngest and there's a pattern that has already been set...everything is a big hullaballoo for the older kids, but by the time my kids get around to doing something (for example, my son's first communion last year) it's kind of a 'been there, done that too many times' attitude. But yet, like a said, a precedent is set, and I feel the pressure not to be the only family showing up at a party empty-handed.

I was looking on etsy and found a few nice items for the girls. Boys are harder, maybe I will just do itunes cards for some of the younger ones.

wdwfan16
04-08-2010, 04:38 PM
I need some input. DH is one of 5 kids; there are 19 neices and nephews on his side. Between all of those kids, there are 8 graduations (some from grade school, 2 from high school, 2 from college) and 2 Confirmations this year. Usually we have 2 or 3 of these events going on each year, but not TEN! And they are all within 1 month of one another. Normally I give $50 for graduations (which honestly, I don't feel like that is enough for a college graduation gift) but I can't afford to pony up $500 for all of these events.

I wish I could come up with some meaningful gift ideas that would be cherished AND help me save money. Or at least come up with some kind of alternative to shelling out all this cash.

Any thoughts/tips would be greatly appreciated.


First skips the stupid grade school ones. That brings it down to $300.

I would still skip 8th grade. But if you did for all the others than you should do for them too and in the same denomination.

tommya60
04-08-2010, 04:40 PM
Well, if you have already given gifts for grade school graduation, you are stuck. Changing mid-stream is hard on everyone. I'd do small i-tunes for gradeschool (if you HAVE to do somthing), either i-Tunes or Barnes and Noble for high school graduation (they sell textbooks for colleges) and a Target card for the college grads. If you start buying them now at least you can spread it out over several months.

FoundMyPrince
04-08-2010, 05:11 PM
I'd skip buying anything other than a card for the 8th grade graduations.

Perhaps for the high school or college graduations, you and the other siblings could go together and buy a nice larger gift for the neice/nephew?

And, we're protestant and I am no help on the confirmation part...kind of clueless on that one.

amylevan
04-08-2010, 06:15 PM
I have often put together baskets of things a college student will need for dorm life for high school graduates (well actually I use a crate instead of a basket since crates are indespensible for college students). Think mugs, a melamine plate/bowl/glass set, bulletin or white board for door, quarter dispenser, picture frames...The basket can be put together rather cheaply if you shop sales and hit target/walmart.

For college graduation, money is really the best bet.

I wouldn't do grade school, but if needed, maybe a savings bond? Gift cards for Itunes or maybe movie tickets?

For confirmation, female - maybe jewelry? You could probably find a nice looking necklace or earrings for reasonable. Male - I'm back to thinking Itunes or movie tickets.

ziggystardust
04-08-2010, 06:34 PM
i feel your pain. I have 6 weddings from may - aug. 2 i'm in (1 my sister and 1 my best friend) and 3 of those, my boyfriend is in. So needless to say, i will be attending all of the showers, if not throwing them. plus i just moved. the expense is killing me.

scooterpig
04-08-2010, 06:35 PM
I understand the precidence thing..and I think you're doing the right thing. I can often find nice, meaningful gifts in a very affordable price range if I search the web long enough. Try also Amazon, and keep your eye on the Ebay daily deals.

PaulaSue
04-08-2010, 06:45 PM
OP, why give to the kids not really graduating? I would only give to one graduating from HS and College. Too many people expect presents for not big life events...IMO

Pastamom
04-08-2010, 06:50 PM
Do you or can you get some photos of the grads (esp the younger ones)? You could get them a nice photo album leaving some pages blank for the next chapter in their life. My DS's are always getting random photos from school/friends etc. They (and so do I) love having a place to put all of them. You could write a nice note or find a poem, or include the book Oh the Place You'll Go by Dr. Suess - It's a classic for grads.

Rosiekins
04-08-2010, 06:52 PM
My 2 very favorite gifts when I graduated were a woven blanket (the kind towns sell to make money) that had this historic town park near where I grew up on it and my towns name, I clung to this thing when I moved because I was homesick lol and a Beautiful leather journal. I still have and cherish both. I know you can get the journals and Barnes and Noble from about $15 to $45 depending on the one you pick.

We give all the graduates we know the same thing A leather complete works of William Shakespeare with a bookplate in it congratulating them and telling them we hope this a start to a great library. We have gotten so many thanks and positive feed back over this gift. Really nice ones are $20 at Barnes and Noble. How about pretty (or handsome)cross necklaces, bracelets or earrings for the conformations and invitations to lunch with you (if they are close) for the grade schoolers? I guess what I am saying is find something special and unique, it doesn't have to cost a ton but it will be remembered.

mom4graceandlogan
04-08-2010, 06:59 PM
The confirmations should be easy. Do something from your local christian bookstore. Lots of necklaces, bracelets with inscriptions or sterling silver bookmarks with inscriptions for 15-25 dollars. I got my daughter a girls' Bible for her elementary graduation from Christian school. It had a cool girly cover, storage case and a special section on how to deal with girl issues, peer pressure etc. with bible verse references. SHop now, Graduation is a busy time for them and things will be more picked over. Got the Bible on sale for $15.00. I have never heard of 8th grade graduation gifts. not popular here. I would think $25.00 would be the absolute max for me if they did do them. For high school if they are going away to a dorm find out dorm colors and do some sort of storage container with dorm supplies. Assuming they are going to college. I got towels and twin sized sheets that I really liked. For college Grad. probably money. I got a great pen that I used for years.

SunnieRN
04-08-2010, 07:36 PM
Eight grade graduations:

A movie gift certificate

A water park 1 day pass

McDonalds, Subway or other type gift cards

The theme here to me is that usually their friends will be out and about and it gives them a chance to do something without asking Mom and Dad for the money.

Confirmation: A cross, necklace, watch, Book or a new bible(but usually MORE than 1 is received), a Christian novel or a gift certificate to a favorite.

High School: If college bound, find out an item they need. I got my niece a book light, a blanket and various notepads, pens and a snack basket. About $60 I think. She loved it and would call me when she ate the snacks. lol

If work bound, a piece of clothing that would be appropriate for work is always nice. There are usually great buys online for this kind of item.

College graduation: My same niece has asked for $$ from everyone so she can furnish her first apartment. This is easy as she has very varied tastes in what she likes/dislikes. I was going to get her a night at a bed and breakfast, so this will be MUCH easier. For my other relations I have done a pinata, filled with nickels, dimes and quarters, in the amount I wanted to give (saved for about a year), gift certificates for their favorite restaurant, a pen/pencil set, and a box with a brick in it and rolled up $1 tied with ribbon and put in the box and wrapped. Do you have any idea how long it takes to do this? lol

Anyway, whatever you think they will like will probably be a hit. II prefer non money gifts as it doesn't focus on the amount, but on the time and care you put into it!

sk!mom
04-08-2010, 07:52 PM
A grade school graduation would get nothing from me unless I was actually invited to some type of party (do parents actually throw parties for such a small milestone?) even then I would give a very small token- maybe marble slap gift card- kick off the summer break with ice cream.

High School calls for something more but still reasonable. I like something to be used for college if they're going.

College is when I'd give a large gift and I'd save my money for that.

RumpleMom
04-08-2010, 09:00 PM
For high school graduates make a blanket for studying- knit, crochet, quilt or the fabric store has no-sew fleece blankets you can make for about $20.

For college graduates make a collection of simple recipes, maybe family favorites, to help them with cooking on their own.

Grade school graduates- we don't do anything.

nilseks
04-08-2010, 09:29 PM
Thanks so much for all the great ideas. I definitely love the personal gifts. Totally love the leather journal idea and some of the others that were mentioned as graduation gifts.

And yes, they DO have a party for the ones who are graduating 8th grade, that's why I have to give a gift. For example, in one household, there is are twins graduating 8th grade, one son graduating high school, and another graduating college (yep, it's true!). So they will have one party for all of them. I can't walk into a party that's for all of them, and only have gifts for 2 of them, ya know? But I've got some great ideas now that will help me save money. Thanks!

Cooky
04-08-2010, 09:54 PM
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