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View Full Version : Believe me, I am thrilled they are safe..


newmousecateer
08-01-2002, 03:37 PM
But could someone please tell me why a 16 and 17 yr old girls are out until 2:00 a.m.? :confused: :confused:

Would you let your daughter stay out that late at that age?

Mary Jo
08-01-2002, 03:44 PM
<font color=navy>I think I'd be safe in betting that their parents don't let them out that late again anytime soon...

gemmie214
08-01-2002, 03:44 PM
I couldn't stay out till 3 am when I was in my 20's and living at home. They couldn't sleep and hey their house their rules:)

luvwinnie
08-01-2002, 03:49 PM
It depended on what I was doing...I was always dependable and responsible, and all that. So, yes was sometimes out until 1 or 2 at 17. Once you hit 18, if you go away to school, your parents have no control over what time you get in.

luvwinnie
08-01-2002, 03:51 PM
this could have happened at any time really.

wvjules
08-01-2002, 03:52 PM
Yes, I think when my DD is 17 I'd let her stay out until that late.

newmousecateer
08-01-2002, 03:57 PM
Thanks for the input everyone. I was just curious. After reading the thread "how old are you" I realize I am a LOT older than a lot of people here on the DIS. ;)

It's just that I was never allowed to stay out that late. My curfew if I remember correctly was 11:30, sometimes midnight. I guess "back in those days" LOL that was kind of the norm for girls, so I guess with changing times, changing curfews.

Beauty
08-01-2002, 04:03 PM
I was allowed to stay out that late my senior year of high school. We had senior parties etc....and actually we never did anything that bad. I don't find it odd them out that late actually. But I think this could happen anytime too. Until my senior year my curfew was always 11:30 unless I called my mom and asked to stay later. I was always open and honest with my mom and she gave me more priveledges because of my honesty. For example I would tell her, mom I'm going to a party yes there will be drinking but I don't like beer so don't worry. I guess honesty with mom was the best way to go.

DocRafiki
08-01-2002, 04:04 PM
Like someone said, that's almost college age. I started college at 17, so.... no curfew (except when I returned home during weekends). I don't think that going from a midnight curfew when you're living at home one day - to no curfew when you move out the next day - is a very logical transition.

nativetxn
08-01-2002, 04:07 PM
I didn't allow my son to stay out that late when he was 17 and if I'd had a daughter, I wouldn't have allowed it for her either. But I'm older than most of the parents on this board, I may just be old fashioned.

Kallison
08-01-2002, 04:21 PM
Well my parents didn't allow it, but I did it anyway. I had a nightlight in the hallway I was supposed to turn off, signifying I was home. My brother used to go upstairs after my parents went to bed and turn it off for me.

Muffin
08-01-2002, 04:40 PM
I'm with Kallison on this one. I wasn't allowed out that late either, but I stayed out that late and even later.

Jeff in BigD
08-01-2002, 04:41 PM
Pretty much from the time I could work, I did, so getting home after 11pm on a school night was pretty normal.

During the summer I didn't really have a curfew, but my folks trusted my judgment & knew that I could take care of myself in not-so-great circumstances.

Actually during summer time I was allowed to stay out pretty late (as long as it was at a specific place) in Jr. High. My 7th & 8th grade year almost every weekend I was at DL until it closed at 12 or 1am.

GEM
08-01-2002, 05:09 PM
When I was that old I was allowed to stay out pretty much as late as I wanted in the summer time. As long as I told my parents who I was going to be with etc., they didn't impose any kind of curfew on me. They just asked me to call home every so often if I was going to be out really late.

Pooh93
08-01-2002, 05:15 PM
I may just be old fashioned.


I was never allowed out that late in high school ever.I didn't start staying out that late until I was in my early 20's. Guess my dad was old fashioned. I'm glad he was. But maybe that's why I was a later bloomer!!;) ;) Lol Of course, for a couple years there, I made up for lost time!!;) ;)

Don't know how hold you are newmousecateer, but I'm 40.

WDWHound
08-01-2002, 05:17 PM
My curfew was 10:30. On rare occasions (such as prom night). I could get it extended if I called and asked. This remained true 18 and out of High School.

My parents said there was no good reason for a teen to be out later than 10:30 in most cases. Thinking back on it, I agree with them.

Beanie
08-01-2002, 05:21 PM
I never had a curfew when I was in high school...Of course, I live in a very small town and there is not much trouble you can get into anyway!:rolleyes: ;) My parents trusted that I was making the right decisions and as long as I let them know who I was with, they were fine! :)

Poohbear123
08-01-2002, 05:23 PM
and my curfew was 12:00 midnight! Not that I dated much anyway, but my DD was 1-2am on weekends, and sometimes she would stay out till 3-4am:rolleyes: . (One of the reasons WHY she left home, didn't like the "rules.") My DS ONLY stayed out till 3:00am ONE time, and he caught Heck from ME! He was 17 at the time, when he turned 18, if he stayed out till 1:00 that was long!:rolleyes:

disneyjunkie
08-01-2002, 05:48 PM
I'm 34 and think that's way to late for a 16 year old to be out. As a teen I had to be in the house by 10:00. After I graduated from HS it went to 11:00, I could stay out later, if I called my parents and let know where I would be.

When I was away at college I stayed out as late as I wanted. When I came home for break is was back to the rules of the house.

Lola
08-01-2002, 06:00 PM
Just some younger input here .. I'm 16 and will be a senior in September. During my junior year and now into this summer, my curfew is 11:00 .. Some of my friends have a 12/12:30 curfew, while others don't have a set one. Sometimes I get SO mad b/c I have to be home "so much earlier" than everyone else, and I miss everything good lol .. But "there's no reason why a 16 year old girl needs to be out later than 11.." Even though I see it as unfair, my mom is only looking out for me .. I'd rather have "overprotective" parents rather than "underprotective."

newmousecateer
08-01-2002, 07:05 PM
Lola

Appreciate the input from someone who is "there" You sound like you appreciate your curfew - kind of "tough love" from your parents that suits you.

Pooh93

I am 53. I guess that is where my old fashioned thinking comes from (the dark ages)

The reason I ask, DS and DIL have signed a paper that if anything happens to both of them, they want me and DH to raise DGD (almost 7). Couldn't think of a better compliment than that!

I was thinking, if we were raising her, what curfew would we give her? (DH probably wouldn't let her out of the house LOL)

Again, thanks for the input everyone.

:D

bsnyder
08-01-2002, 07:17 PM
One of the greatest things that has happened since I was a teenager is that the State of Florida now has a law that 16 year olds can't be driving past 11:00! At age 17 it goes up to 1:00.

Even though I'm usually not an adovcate of governmental intervention into our private lives, I love this new law. The state sets the curfew and I don't have to be the bad guy! ;)

That being said, if I didn't have that excuse, I think the curfew for my 16 year old should be no later than 12:00. For my older son, who is 18, and going to college in a few weeks, he did not have a curfew this summer. The latest he's stayed out is 1:45.

helenabear
08-01-2002, 07:23 PM
I'm a younger one (25) and honestly the only time I think a 16 or 17 year old should be out that late would be on a special occasion like prom. I grew up in a city (suburb of a big city really) that had a legal curfew of midnight and it was enforced very strictly too I might add. So that was my curfew. When I turned 18, the curfew was lifted and I only stayed out until maybe 12:30 or 1:00 am. Only when I started working a night shift in college did I stay out until 2-4 am, but that was because that was my sleep schedule and more understandable (of course I'd also be working until 7 am most of the time so I'd come home at 7:30 at points from work thogh). Call my old-fashioned for my age, but I think curfews are a good thing and should be enforced as long as the kid lives at home if the parent wants to make them have one.

ugadog99
08-01-2002, 08:30 PM
I was thinking the exact same thing. How could they be out that late/early? I was never allowed to stay out like that and my girls won't be allowed, either. I guess I'm just old-fashioned...or maybe I'm just OLD! :rolleyes:

PamOKW
08-01-2002, 11:19 PM
It seems like a lot of high-school kids have privileges more along the lines of what college age kids used to have. They go off in groups (no chaperone) on spring break trips, they go to clubs (suppossedly with wristbands for not drinking), set their own curfews, etc. I'm not sure how or why this all came about. I think it may partially be the way teenagers are portrayed on TV. You never see a parent around.

I heard this evening that the girls were alive but they have been raped by the captor. Pretty awful experience for them. :(

aahmom1
08-01-2002, 11:59 PM
No way will my kids be allowed to stay out until 2 a.m. There is absolutely no reason for them to be out at that hour, not to mention I wouldn't want my kids on the road with all the drunks leaving the bars at 2 O'clock in the morning.

Mamu
08-02-2002, 06:19 AM
All my children had a curfew, it did vary with age and with the time of year.

Now I'm not saying they always kept the curfew and there were times when punishments were handed out.

I have no idea why these girls were out so late, could be a late movie or some other reason, no judgement cast but I do think it was a little late for a week night.

Cindy B
08-02-2002, 06:27 AM
I never did either, I was engaged to my DH, living at home, and still had a curfew... (and I was 19 then!)

Especially at 17 years old, thats really really late, and inappropriate.


(I guess I am old fashioned as well, but I'm 31!)

believe
08-02-2002, 06:58 AM
The only time I stayed out late was if I worked that night. I still came straight home from work. I didn't want to answer to my Dad so it was easier to just obey the 'unspoken' rules.
Once I met DH, I was 19, that went out the window.
My DDs will have a curfew when they are older and it will NOT be 1 or 2am.

browneyes
08-02-2002, 07:15 AM
I only stayed out that late when I was at that age if our basketball games were far away and the games went into overtime or something.

I never had a curfew.

danacara
08-02-2002, 07:57 AM
This is a "pick your battles" type parenting decision. If you have a good kid, what difference does it make whether the curfew is 12, 1, 2? Also, do you want to stay up all night enforcing a curfew? None of the five of us ever had one. "We trust you. Act responsibly" always worked for us.

TeresaNJ
08-02-2002, 08:07 AM
I really never imposed a curfew on my two sons who are now 21 & 22, but they usually never went anywhere except a friend's house, and usually all the kids were always at our house, but my DD is another story. She is 16 and thinks she should be able to do whatever she wants. She gives me the line that she has good judgment and is responsible. I don't think there is any good reason why teens have to be out past 12:30/1am. Most movies are over by then, and where else is there to go at that time? If she is at a friend's house and they are just watching TV or a movie then I'll agree to 1am, but she has to call me from the house and I have to know that there is a parent there. Sometimes her and her friends are here, and if they are watching a movie and it is late, they'll all sleep here, but they have to let their parents know where they are. Last night she didn't get home until 2am, so now she's grounded, as I feel she took advantage of me. I guess she wasn't counting on me waking up before she got home. She was with her two girlfriends, one of whom is 17 and drives, and they were at another friend's house. My DD doesn't see anything wrong in coming home at 2am. I told her nothing good can come of being on the road at that time when all the drunks are out, and people who are half-asleep are driving. She is definitely giving me gray hairs.

On the other hand, my father was so strict that I think I had to be home by midnight when I was engaged! He would actually sit in the recliner where he could look out the front door and wait for me to come home. He would not go to bed until I was in the house. Now I understand where he was coming from, as I really can't sleep until I know DD is home, but at the time it use to make me so mad.