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cjnix29
01-27-2010, 02:28 PM
I just got off the phone with a friend of mine who has a 2 month old baby. They are up to their eyeballs in debt, for many reasons....(please, no comments about this part please)....she has been breastfeeding, and wants to continue, but wants to pump and use bottles if she can, simply because she would like to take a shower every once in awhile, and that is clearly not happening right now. They have tried two different kinds of bottles, but the baby screams. So she is going to try to experiment, but can't afford to go out and buy 8 differnet kinds to try, especially since it's almost impossible to buy just one in a package. Any suggestions? Is there a great website to get them, or any great coupons, discounts that anyone knows of? I am going to start sending her diaper coupons, etc. But not sure about this one.

JGoin
01-27-2010, 02:30 PM
What about her local Craig's List? Or is there a consignment sale or store around her? I've found Avent bottles through someone who was selling some-3 bottle pack in brand new in packaging for $5--- HTH!

a1tinkfans
01-27-2010, 02:43 PM
OH, I wish we could buy them for her. But is there a church, organization that could help her out...I do not like to buy any knock off stuff , especially for babies, too much risk involved...I wish I had an answer for you. Its hard enough having a baby and debt and having to worry about cost is just another cross to bear....:hug:
I am keeping her in my prayers...............:grouphug:

mjkacmom
01-27-2010, 02:44 PM
I had a ds who hated most bottles (and he was bottle fed, not bf). Avent worked for him, and others have had good luck with Dr. Browns, I believe. Both aren't cheap - maybe find used, and buy new nipples? Although she won't need many if she's still bfing. Maybe she can borrow from a friend temporarily just to check one out? I tried every bottle I could find in the grocery store, but nope - had to go to a baby store.

rparmfamily
01-27-2010, 03:05 PM
Is she on WIC? She may be able to get a pump thru them. As for bottles, Craigslist is great. She could post asking for some for cheap. Good luck to her and kudos to her for nursing!

I hope she has the knowledge and support to pump and nurse. It can be tricky!

cjnix29
01-27-2010, 03:17 PM
Thanks for your kind words. This is her third, and it wasn't planned. She had already gotten rid of all her supplies from her previous two. She's a nurse, but hasn't been able to work during her pregnancy. And still can't go back yet. So she and her husband have been struggling. I will have her post a request on craigslist. I checked my local one, and not much is there.

Tinkerbelle99
01-27-2010, 03:30 PM
I breast feed our DD and getting her to take the bottle (as I had to return to work) was difficult. She didnt care for them, but finally found one she liked, Avent.

More than the bottle type, babies who are breastfeed, prefer the breast and it will take some getting used too for them to make the switch. sometimes its not the bottle/nipple brand she is rejecting, its probably the the whole bottle feed episode altogether.

What we did was ... I never gave her the bottle myself, the bottles were given to her by DH and then my mom, as she watched our DD while we worked. She fussed at first, but hey, when your hungry - your hungry. And we kept this routine the entire time. I never bottle fed her...I breastfeed when I was home, and faithfully took my pump to work everyday to ensure she had breastmilk available at all times.

I hope she is able to find something that works, its hard...but well worth the effort!

babycheapskate.com is a great site to find baby bargains, but they also run a site freepeat.com (sorta like freecycle, i think). and she may be able to find some assistance there.

Good luck!!

labdogs42
01-27-2010, 03:35 PM
My son was breastfed and I was able to shower quite frequently. I think she's exaggerating a bit. It is such a waste of time and energy (IMO) to pump and put breastmilk in a bottle when the perfect delivery system is already attached to your body. If she isn't working, I see no need for bottles. But, if she insists, I guess I'd check into WIC. I would HOPE they would provide or help with these supplies (like a pump) just like they provide formula for babies. As for bottles, my DS used the Playtex Nursers when I went back to work and had to pump. They were great, but they do require the purchase of the liners. I don't know about any of the other bottles. Is she going back to work soon? Is that why she needs bottles? If not, she really should just consider BF exclusively and showering when the baby naps. That's my two cents!

All American
01-27-2010, 03:46 PM
I formula-feed my baby (3 months) and use the Dr. Brown's bottles (did with my first baby as well). I love them! They are not cheap (but worth it--no gas or fussiness) and are, at first, a pain to clean. However, once you get a good system going, it's not too terrible. (I keep a tub by the sink, rinse the bottles when done, and set them in the tub until I clean them.) Since her baby is getting older, she could get by with a probably 3 or 4 bottles (thus saving some money) and clean them throughout the day.

chocovrdmicears
01-27-2010, 03:51 PM
My son was breastfed and I was able to shower quite frequently. I think she's exaggerating a bit. It is such a waste of time and energy (IMO) to pump and put breastmilk in a bottle when the perfect delivery system is already attached to your body. If she isn't working, I see no need for bottles. But, if she insists, I guess I'd check into WIC. I would HOPE they would provide or help with these supplies (like a pump) just like they provide formula for babies. As for bottles, my DS used the Playtex Nursers when I went back to work and had to pump. They were great, but they do require the purchase of the liners. I don't know about any of the other bottles. Is she going back to work soon? Is that why she needs bottles? If not, she really should just consider BF exclusively and showering when the baby naps. That's my two cents!

Wow! Really? How many children do you have? This is her third. I had 2 in 2 years and there were MANY MANY times that showering in peace was not at option for me. And um.. ok...you think it is a waste of time and energy and you see no need for bottles...but I thought this thread was about someone else needing help..not asking for opinions on the fundamentals of breastfeeding..:rolleyes1

onyx8
01-27-2010, 03:55 PM
Gerber makes bottles that cost 99 cents each - you can get them at Target. They sell them in singles, 9oz and 5oz. Good luck!

labdogs42
01-27-2010, 03:55 PM
Wow! Really? How many children do you have? This is her third. I had 2 in 2 years and there were MANY MANY times that showering in peace was not at option for me. And um.. ok...you think it is a waste of time and energy and you see no need for bottles...but I thought this thread was about someone else needing help..not asking for opinions on the fundamentals of breastfeeding..:rolleyes1

I have one child. I don't think that has any bearing on the question. I thought the OP said the woman coudn't shower because she was BF, not because she was running after her other kids. Pumping takes time, too. As much time or longer than just feeding the baby. I know, I have done it. So, I don't see how pumping and feeding the baby bottles will free up time for showering. That was my point.

I didn't think I was making the thread about me, I was sharing my experience and recommendations (in case you didn't notice, I did recommend some bottles). Sorry you were so terribly offended by that.

onyx8
01-27-2010, 04:01 PM
Also, tell your friend to leave the house while someone else offers the baby a bottle. Sometimes just having mom anywhere nearby will prevent the baby from taking the bottle.

tinker&belle
01-27-2010, 04:28 PM
Wow...I feel for her. I had two in two years and younger DD was unable to breastfeed due to her cleft palate. I pumped milk for her and which took SO much time. The only reason I got a shower was my mom and DH made giving me that 15 min a priority.

My oldest was a breastfed baby and she liked the Playtex nursers. You can get Target brand liners for these which are much cheaper and I found they were just as good.

For the PP who said she didn't see any use for bottles, I am a bf advocate. I REALLY am. I had a lactation consultant and went to extreme measures with my oldest who had difficulty nursing and made nursing happen. I went to LLL meetings. I pumped tirelessly for my youngest since she physically could not do it without turning blue from lack of oxygen.

I understand that in a perfect situation exclusive BF is ideal. With each child in the family it adds another diminsion. This is a mother of three. If she needs a break every now and then it is good she can identify this need and not allow herself to sink into a level of PP depression and be able to care for herself and her children.

HelenePA
01-27-2010, 06:03 PM
I have 4 kiddos, dh works 70 hrs a week I'm alone pretty much all the time.. my 1 yr old is still breastfeeding and I'm able to shower. :) Anyway he's NEVER NEVER liked a bottle. NEVER. The very few times he took one he used the Avent ones. He uses sippys now! He hated the playtex ones but my others like those.. going to sound strange but tell her to look at her nipples (can I say nipples?) and try to find a nipple/bottle combo that looks like hers. Also if she can't find any on craigslist try freecycle.org have her post and ask for a few bottles to try out.. I would buy new nips though.

Shmily1
01-27-2010, 06:43 PM
DGS6months has tried several different types of bottles and he prefers the ones from Walmart that are the cheap ones (like 3 for $4 or can be bought individually for a little over $1). They have different designs on them like butterflies, the word baby, etc on them. The nipples are a little smaller and the flow is not so easy and doesn't choke him out like most others do. We have tried Avent, Dr Browns, Nuk, Soothie, and Playtex. The Playtex ones are the next best for him.

No snide comments here about having time to herself. I can totally see the good of having someone else giving the baby a bottle while she relaxes in the shower. It is also good for the mom to have some quiet time for her own sanity. I do agree that if the baby doesn't want the bottle with the mom in that part of the house, she may have to go to a different part of the house until the baby gets use to taking a bottle. DS19 would not take a bottle from anyone if I was near enough for him to smell me! :lmao:

Good luck to her.

cjnix29
01-27-2010, 06:55 PM
Thank you for the suggestions. The kind words are appreciated. The snarky remarks are precisely why I hesitate to write things on this board. Why is it that people have to pass judgment on others,especially when you dont' know all the circumstances? Don't understand it. But I really do appreciate the suggestions.

mspencer
01-27-2010, 07:10 PM
I too think it's great she realizes she needs that break. I also think it's better to get her baby used to an occasional bottle now than to wait. I tried within the first month or so with my little one so she didn't fight it and found that Avent also worked with her. I think the nipple is supposed to be more natural like a mother. I did a lot of searching on the internet to see what types of bottles are supposed to work best for babies who are also breastfed. I did enjoy the time I spent with my youngest nursing, but it can be exhausting being the sole person responsible for nourishing your child...especially when there are 2 more to care for. Good luck to her and whatever decisions she makes for her family are the best for her and her situation...always remember that.

Ephany
01-27-2010, 07:12 PM
In addition to freecycle and craigslist, try ebay or yardsales. Or maybe a local children's consignment shop or thrift store might have a varied selection so she can try different brands for an affordable price. They'll have to buy new nipples, but it's better than buying the whole system new. :goodvibes

tessiemez
01-27-2010, 07:19 PM
Does she already have a pump? If not, see if she can test out a rental pump (you can find certified rental pumps on the Medela website) or get a cheapie handpump to try out before she spends too much money, just because many women aren't pump-friendly. I know lots of women that pumps worked great on, but quite a few women who bad luck with pumps, and ensured that all the pump parts were sized properly--they would have to pump for twice as long to get maybe half as much as a normal feeding would provide. It's simply because a pump is not as effective as the real thing.

That being said, she may want to try the soothie bottles. They're relatively inexpensive and I've known many BF'd babies that like them. They're available at Wal-Mart.

ETA: I feel for her, trying to find time to herself to do something as simple as take a shower. All parents are different--so some on here may have been able to easily find time--but it's not so easy for some to get a break. I had a friend whose baby would cry every time the shower ran, and who would magically wake up from the deepest sleep if the mom got food near her mouth. I witnessed it myself. Amazing!

Mrs. Charming
01-27-2010, 07:20 PM
Gerber makes bottles that cost 99 cents each - you can get them at Target. They sell them in singles, 9oz and 5oz. Good luck!

They're just fine as far as bottles go. We started using those awhile after DD was born... LOL after we bought all the leaky, expensive, hard to clean bottles.

I have found no point in buying the super expensive ones!

tinker&belle
01-27-2010, 07:30 PM
They're just fine as far as bottles go. We started using those awhile after DD was born... LOL after we bought all the leaky, expensive, hard to clean bottles.

I have found no point in buying the super expensive ones!

We have used these with the younger DD since her special premie nipples fit on them.

They are fine if the baby likes a regular size nipple. The Avent ones and Playtex ones are the larger variety.

I was at Target the other day and they had a bottle shaped like a breast. I thought this was a great idea for a baby transitioning to bottles, but they were pretty expensive.

**eeyore**
01-27-2010, 07:30 PM
Thank you for the suggestions. The kind words are appreciated. The snarky remarks are precisely why I hesitate to write things on this board. Why is it that people have to pass judgment on others,especially when you dont' know all the circumstances? Don't understand it. But I really do appreciate the suggestions.

I don't think there were any snarky comments. Personal opinions, but I don't think anyone was trying to be rude.

hippiemama76
01-27-2010, 07:35 PM
If it's just an occasional shower here and there, it's really quite easy to hand express milk. Also, many LCs suggest using an alternative feeding method to bottles so there is no nipple confusion. Moms have used shot glasses (the babies kind of lap the milk like a kitten would), a medicine dropper, a spoon, etc.

If you would like some more information, PM me! :)

labdogs42
01-27-2010, 07:49 PM
I don't think there were any snarky comments. Personal opinions, but I don't think anyone was trying to be rude.

Thanks. I certainly didn't think my post was snarky (I'm assuming it was my post that was perceived this way). I was actually trying to be helpful.

cjnix29
01-27-2010, 07:50 PM
She does have a pump, she just can't get baby Ruby to take anything she has pumped. She's just started to try, she just wants the option so that she can get some help, and so that her husband can actually feed the baby.

adisneymama
01-27-2010, 07:54 PM
I'm not sure what kind of bottles she is using but it may just be the nipple. Neither one of my kids would take a silicone nipple. I could only use latex. Maybe have her see if she can find some latex nipples to work with her current bottles. That made the world of difference for us! G/L!

eeyorethegreat
01-27-2010, 08:34 PM
I think she may have to try various bottle types realistically she may need to buy several until she finds on that the baby will accept. She should try giving the baby to Dad and taking a shower let him try like others have said while she is not available. This is a good way to start and if the baby doesn't like that particular bottle (keep trying on it a few times). I am guessing the reason is more than just that she has a hard time taking a shower. Having had 4 kids in 5 years, I was always able to take a shower. Sometimes I would have all the kids in the bathroom with me while I did it but I was able to get clean. If it is just about the ability to shower, she could nurse the baby prior to taking a shower or when the baby is sleeping. Even if she wants to go out with out the baby for an hour or two the baby will be fine with out her. She can nurse before she leaves and even if the baby cries while she is gone, the baby will really be ok. A couple hours away will do them both some good. I am sure she will find a bottle the baby will take.

Ava
01-27-2010, 08:52 PM
She does have a pump, she just can't get baby Ruby to take anything she has pumped. She's just started to try, she just wants the option so that she can get some help, and so that her husband can actually feed the baby.
Our BF DD had trouble taking a bottle too. We introduced her to one at around 2 weeks old and she took it fine, then at around 7-8 weeks old she just decided she didn't like it any more. She tried on & off for months until she finally started taking it again at around 5 months old. The bottle she ended up taking was the Nuby Natural Touch so we've stuck with that one, but honestly I don't know that it had a whole lot to do with the type of bottle. I think she was just ready to be able to switch between breast & bottle at that point.

I would tell your friend to get a bottle with the wider nipple (the ones supposed to be more like the breast) but don't go crazy buying different types. Also have her leave the house & someone else offer the bottle to the baby. That could help as well.

MrsPete
01-27-2010, 08:54 PM
My health insurance bought me a hospital-grade breast pump. It was really effective, but I didn't use it much. It was so much more work than simply nursing. By the time you pump, warm the bottles, feed the baby, then wash the bottles . . . you've put in about three times as much time as simply nursing.

Really, pumping only makes sense when you're working and are away from the baby.

I suspect the real problem is entertaining the two older kids while she nurses. At two months, she's undoubtably spending a great deal of her day feeding the new baby, and if her two are anything like my oldest, they're probably a little resentful of the intruder who's taking up mom's time -- for a time, my oldest was HORRIBLE while I was feeding her sister. When my husband was home, it was fine: he played with her or read to her; all she wanted was some attention. But while we were home alone during the day, it was a problem!

Could your friend put together a "quiet box" of coloring books, Viewmaster toys, etc. for the older ones and encourage them to sit quietly with her while she nurses? These things, of course, would ONLY be available during baby's feeding time. Or how about books on tape from the library? Or could she make a point of rewarding them with a sticker or something every time they behave while she's feeding the new baby? When they earn X number of stickers, they earn a trip to the park or the library. Or could she withhold TV from the older ones EXCEPT for the baby's feeding time?

Donnainnj
01-27-2010, 09:09 PM
I never had a problem with the bottle itself, it was always the nipple shape that would make or break their bottle feeding. The little time my youngest used a bottle (while still nursing) we did well with Nuk orthodontic silicone nipples. They could fit on the cheap/safe bottles I found at target (or any other regular bottle) as pictured here
http://www.amazon.com/NUK-Silicone-Orthodontic-Nipples-Slow/dp/B002KAR786
I do believe I had to increase the size of the whole and add a couple more as he got older.
Donna

All American
01-27-2010, 11:08 PM
She does have a pump, she just can't get baby Ruby to take anything she has pumped. She's just started to try, she just wants the option so that she can get some help, and so that her husband can actually feed the baby.

I think it's great she realizes she needs help and is willing to find it. It's so hard when babies are little; you just get so exhausted. I hope she can figure something out, and for what it's worth, my husband took our baby at midnight last night and fed her. I was so tired I could barely walk. I loved that he could help in that regard, and I know he enjoys feeding the baby now and then. It's how he bonds with them until they are old enough to play video games. :rotfl2:

WendyLovesPeter
01-27-2010, 11:41 PM
I am currently breastfeeding my 5th, and she is so non bottle.... we have tried! I am not currently "needed" at work, so I rolled my 12 wks into 20 wks off - more time than I planned, but works o.k. for this situation. Anyway...... I have had the best luck with NUK orthodontic nipples. The hole is not at the tip -it is on the side and you face this side up in the mouth. they worked for 4 of the kids... I don't have this one convinced yet. I don't recommend the MAM - my young one is horrified and offended when my husband tries to offer this one.

As far as the shower debate... something I do when necessary is take the baby in the shower with me. i put her on her little tub cot at the far end of the tub, and I pick her up and put her down as necessary so we both get out bath and I don't have to worry that she is out in the other room screaming or missing me. It is actually quite soothing for her.... she completely relaxes in my arms - of course the water isn't spraying at her head or face. this practice may raise some eyebrows here, but I don't really care. And, sometimes you have to get creative to get it all done with large families..

JennsBabySky
01-28-2010, 12:15 AM
Your post brings back so many memories. My DD would not take a bottle. I tried EVERY kind on the market place. Well, actually grandma and DH tried everything. After a couple weeks of constantly offering the bottle (once I went back to work), DD finally started drinking from the bottle. In the end, she ended up using the Avent, but I honestly think the issue for her was not the bottle type, just merely the fact that it was a bottle. I tried every kind of bottle that I could find, even tried a spoon and any suggestions that were remotely reasonable.

I don't have any great advice, but I probably wouldn't invest in more types of bottles if I were ever in the same situation again. It just required a ton of patience. I wish I had some miracle solution!

Good luck!

rparmfamily
01-28-2010, 12:33 AM
My nearly 8 mo old has also never taken a bottle. We've tried. No dice, the girl knows where the good stuff is LOL. I wish she'd take a bottle on occasion so I could go to scrapbook night or to a movie with friends. But, she's 8 months and soon enough she won't be so dependent on me for food. It really does go by so fast. :(

I have 3 children and shower daily before I take them to school at 7:25am (the older 2), so I put baby in the bouncy right in the bathroom and jump in quickly! When DH is home he takes her and then I can take a long hot shower LOL!

It is hard when it's your first (not sure what number baby this is) or the baby is a fussy one.

Good luck to her!

disneymarie
01-28-2010, 02:51 AM
I just got off the phone with a friend of mine who has a 2 month old baby. They are up to their eyeballs in debt, for many reasons....(please, no comments about this part please)....she has been breastfeeding, and wants to continue, but wants to pump and use bottles if she can, simply because she would like to take a shower every once in awhile, and that is clearly not happening right now. They have tried two different kinds of bottles, but the baby screams. So she is going to try to experiment, but can't afford to go out and buy 8 differnet kinds to try, especially since it's almost impossible to buy just one in a package. Any suggestions? Is there a great website to get them, or any great coupons, discounts that anyone knows of? I am going to start sending her diaper coupons, etc. But not sure about this one.

I always went with platex nursers, especially for freezing milk to have on hand.

Check at the pediatricians office they often have ready to feed samples.

Email to companies asking for coupons or samples for a colicky baby,

Generally it is not the bottle/nipple, a breast feed baby wants the skin, the smell the nipple goes between the tounge and roof of the mouth and whole entire different feel.

Another thing, my bf babies had a two week cycles, of nonstop nursing to increase the stimulation to make more milk. During the time, they were an appendage hanging from my chest.

I can sympathise with her I had two like that. One was 9 months, the first 6 months until some ceral and fruit were introduced; the other was 2 yrs and 10 months, well the last year was milk only because of allergy to all formulas. I even had to keep a no milk diet, but I am lactose intolerant too.

But at 2, yes I said it would never happen, she crawled under my shirt, whipped it out saying mine, YIKES.....

But the first year was tough, it got easier, but not great to try and do anything. I had to get back to work.
I was a police officer, had a break in the shift to run home and nurse, taking off a gun belt and bullet proof vest is not fun.....
I had to pump at work too.

One night on a stake out I had to tell the coworker if it lasted much longer I would be in real rough shape, quizically he looked at me. I tried to tell him soon I would be leaking all down my uniform. I was lucky to get a back up and ran to a mini mart to milk them out...
Mean while a kid at home was not happy and dad had to drive her around in a car...
Mind you we were., 41 and 49 years old. The others were not near as bad.

tinker&belle
01-28-2010, 06:27 AM
I remembered something else someone in a similar situation told me when I was pregnant with first DD. She could try wearing a t-shirt for a little while and then have the person feeding the baby hold the t-shirt where the baby can smell it while they are giving her a bottle.

labdogs42
01-28-2010, 06:32 AM
As far as the shower debate... something I do when necessary is take the baby in the shower with me. i put her on her little tub cot at the far end of the tub, and I pick her up and put her down as necessary so we both get out bath and I don't have to worry that she is out in the other room screaming or missing me. It is actually quite soothing for her.... she completely relaxes in my arms - of course the water isn't spraying at her head or face. this practice may raise some eyebrows here, but I don't really care. And, sometimes you have to get creative to get it all done with large families..

That is a great idea! Never thought of that one! I used to put my DS in a bouncy seat in the bathroom and leave the shower curtain partially open so he could see me. Your idea is even better!

luvsJack
01-28-2010, 07:19 AM
I didn't breast feed but I find the debate of weather the woman should be able to take a bath without using a bottle or whether there is any reason to give the baby a bottle a bit silly. Why do women insist on judging each others parenting styles?

I know plenty of women who bottle fed exclusively and still had a hard time finding any time for themselves. And I would think that is what this mother wants; not so much "getting clean in a shower" as the time alone to rejuvenate. The ideas of putting the baby in eye sight or in the shower are great in a pinch (and I have done both) but just doesn't give the mom the two minutes of alone time that she probably really needs.

Like I said, I didn't breast feed but when we had babies at the daycare that did, their mom's mostly used the Playtex bottles with the liners. I know she can't run out and buy a whole set of one kind just for it not to work; but I think I would buy one each of two different kinds and then try. It will probably take several times of introducing a certain bottle before the baby adjusts to the nipple. Maybe she could ask her ped for a suggestion too.

Either way she should never, ever feel guilty of needing time away from the baby or for giving the baby a bottle (even if it has that evil formula in it instead of breast milk :scared1:!). She is human and has needs like everyone else and babies have thrived with bottles of breast milk for years; no reason to think her child will be any different.

fatuhiva
01-28-2010, 07:55 AM
Both my boys HATED bottles & it was a HUGE struggle when I went back to work. In the end the Avent bottles ended up being the best fit for us.

In addition to trying different nipples/bottles tell her to try all different scenarios when feeding the baby a bottle. Sometimes they know mom has the good stuff & won't take a bottle from her or if she's in the room, but will from dad if mom's not around. Other times they will only take a bottle from mom - somehow they've associated milk with mom. Sometimes they'll only take formula from a bottle since it tastes different. Babies can be such obstinant creatures, LOL. My oldest son wouldn't take a bottle while being held - he had to be under his Pooh arch toy. Weird, I know, but he would be mesmerized by Tigger & didn't pay attention to the source of his milk. Neither of my boys liked thawed breast milk and one of them would only drink milk that had never been frozen.

Not being snarky here at all, but for me the whole bottle issue was extremely stressful. If I hadn't had to leave my sons two days a week for work I would have prefered to nurse exclusively and have someone help in another way to give a break. It would have been so much easier.

fatuhiva
01-28-2010, 08:00 AM
I forgot to add, I had a friend whose daughter never took a bottle, but she did finally drink breast milk from a sippy cup at 4 months. It was an Avent sippy cup that had a soft spout thing.

fatuhiva
01-28-2010, 08:04 AM
As far as the shower debate... something I do when necessary is take the baby in the shower with me. i put her on her little tub cot at the far end of the tub, and I pick her up and put her down as necessary so we both get out bath and I don't have to worry that she is out in the other room screaming or missing me. It is actually quite soothing for her.... she completely relaxes in my arms - of course the water isn't spraying at her head or face. this practice may raise some eyebrows here, but I don't really care.

Been there, done that, think it's a great idea. Before they were mobile they were in a bouncy seat right next to the shower. Once they could sit up, they sat in the corner of the shower, out of the spray, happily playing with a few bath toys.

mjkacmom
01-28-2010, 08:11 AM
Wow! Really? How many children do you have? This is her third. I had 2 in 2 years and there were MANY MANY times that showering in peace was not at option for me. And um.. ok...you think it is a waste of time and energy and you see no need for bottles...but I thought this thread was about someone else needing help..not asking for opinions on the fundamentals of breastfeeding..:rolleyes1

Well, I think she just needs a break. However, I had 5 kids in 7 years, and never had a problem getting a shower in after the first. Besides the fact that I got all of them on a regular nap schedule between 2 - 6 months (depending upon the child), I could always leave them in the crib, and shower, and the worst case scenario was they would cry (I always started the shower when they were sleeping, and having lived through the water shortage in the 70's, still take a fast shower).

I understand that having young children is hard, but I never understood why a SAHM couldn't take a shower. :confused3

Zeebs
01-28-2010, 09:47 AM
I didn't breast feed but I find the debate of weather the woman should be able to take a bath without using a bottle or whether there is any reason to give the baby a bottle a bit silly. Why do women insist on judging each others parenting styles?

I know plenty of women who bottle fed exclusively and still had a hard time finding any time for themselves. And I would think that is what this mother wants; not so much "getting clean in a shower" as the time alone to rejuvenate. The ideas of putting the baby in eye sight or in the shower are great in a pinch (and I have done both) but just doesn't give the mom the two minutes of alone time that she probably really needs.

Like I said, I didn't breast feed but when we had babies at the daycare that did, their mom's mostly used the Playtex bottles with the liners. I know she can't run out and buy a whole set of one kind just for it not to work; but I think I would buy one each of two different kinds and then try. It will probably take several times of introducing a certain bottle before the baby adjusts to the nipple. Maybe she could ask her ped for a suggestion too.

Either way she should never, ever feel guilty of needing time away from the baby or for giving the baby a bottle (even if it has that evil formula in it instead of breast milk :scared1:!). She is human and has needs like everyone else and babies have thrived with bottles of breast milk for years; no reason to think her child will be any different.


I personally don't think anyone was judging, it is just that when someone doesn't express the same opinion it is considered judging.

I also, find expressing more hassle than it is worth, I still have to spend the time doing it, when I could be just feeding the baby and then using hubby to entertain bubs when he is home. While I have my shower/break what ever.

That said I don't give two hoots if someone wants to bottle feed.

But I don't think in most cases it is the bottle that is the problem or the teat it is just the fact it isn't the breast. People say they tried heaps of bottles until they finally found one that the baby would take. Baby most likely got to that last bottle and thought yeah why not I will take the milk I am thirsty enough today, bottle having no bearing on the situation could have been the very first bottle being used again it wouldn't have mattered.

To the OP, your poor friend is probably shattered and with a baby at 2 months they will have been feeding constantly which I think gets even the biggest pro breast feeders down, it will pass........ it just doesn't seem like it when you are in the situation.

If using a bottle is what she wants to do just get her to keep trying, not keep spending money on lots of different bottles.

With regards to the shower, I use to put bubs in the bathroom with me. Heck I have two kids now and another one on the way, I can't remember the last time I had a shower or used the toilet when one or both kids didn't come in and ask something very very important ;)

Kirsten

luvsJack
01-28-2010, 10:15 AM
I personally don't think anyone was judging, it is just that when someone doesn't express the same opinion it is considered judging.

I also, find expressing more hassle than it is worth, I still have to spend the time doing it, when I could be just feeding the baby and then using hubby to entertain bubs when he is home. While I have my shower/break what ever.

That said I don't give two hoots if someone wants to bottle feed.

But I don't think in most cases it is the bottle that is the problem or the teat it is just the fact it isn't the breast. People say they tried heaps of bottles until they finally found one that the baby would take. Baby most likely got to that last bottle and thought yeah why not I will take the milk I am thirsty enough today, bottle having no bearing on the situation could have been the very first bottle being used again it wouldn't have mattered.

To the OP, your poor friend is probably shattered and with a baby at 2 months they will have been feeding constantly which I think gets even the biggest pro breast feeders down, it will pass........ it just doesn't seem like it when you are in the situation.

If using a bottle is what she wants to do just get her to keep trying, not keep spending money on lots of different bottles.

With regards to the shower, I use to put bubs in the bathroom with me. Heck I have two kids now and another one on the way, I can't remember the last time I had a shower or used the toilet when one or both kids didn't come in and ask something very very important ;)
Kirsten

Tell me about it! (bolded part) My youngest is 11 and she still will come "find" me when I am taking a bath and if not her the dog stands at the door and whines!!

maraki527
01-28-2010, 12:13 PM
My lo was bf for a few weeks before we started introducing the bottle to her. We use the Avent bottles. They are pretty expensive and I have found them at Discount Drug Mart (dont know if you have one by you) I have also found other brands reasonably priced at Big Lots.

Shmily1
01-28-2010, 02:37 PM
Tell me about it! (bolded part) My youngest is 11 and she still will come "find" me when I am taking a bath and if not her the dog stands at the door and whines!!

OK now here's the bad news... it never stops!!! DD18 still comes in and just has complete conversations! :rolleyes1

ZPT1022
01-28-2010, 11:34 PM
Tell me about it! (bolded part) My youngest is 11 and she still will come "find" me when I am taking a bath and if not her the dog stands at the door and whines!!

LOL!! On the occasion that I actually grab a book or magazine and get a nice bath, inevitably someone desperately needs something. DH tries to give me my time, he will hear them in there and shout to them to come bug him instead- I think they are just bothered that I might have time alone from them. If I wait til the kids are in bed, one of the cats comes in :laughing:



OP, having nursed three kids myself, unfortunately I agree that it may just be the bottle itself that's the problem. Not the type of bottle rather, but just the baby being upset it's not Mom. When we did have better luck with bottles, we used Avent or the Playtex with the drop in liners. GOod luck to your friend, she deserves 20 minutes a day to herself (at least!)